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Re: What Grates Against Your Nerves?

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Well you would like my father's restaurant. He has a room for

families with children and they are required to sit there, like it or

leave! Some love it, some hate it (both on the parents' side and the

patrons without kids' side.) If you ever go to Door County, Wisconsin

(the getaway place for many Chicagoans) it is there.

>

> Re: Re: What Grates Against Your Nerves?

>

>

> In a message dated 8/26/2006 1:34:46 PM Eastern Standard Time,

> lemnosforge@... writes:

>

> Kind of extrapolating from the gum snappers- people who smack with

> their mouth loudly when eating ...especially when drowning out the

> tv set even!... I knew a high-rated chess-player undiagnosed aspie-

> type-ish ex-roommate who used to do that. It seems to me in some

> vague way I can't quite articulate that there is something about

> mouth-generated noise-sounds that is particularly distracting and

> annoying.

>

> Heph

> Mouth noises are very annoying, which is why I prefer to eat alone.

> If I'm at a restaurant, I'll try to sit where I'm not facing

others,

> which isn't easy since I like to sit where I can see the door and

> where people can't get behind me. If I'm with my mother, I can

> usually get her to sit in such a way that she blocks people with

> particularly annoying eating habits.

>

>

>

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>

> " In some cases I think there isn't really any one single correct

action- just an overall impression the interviewer gathers. The only

thing that would really matter to me as the interviewer is - do you

treat the waiter with respect? Oh yeah, and do you smack and loud

noises when eating. (Humor...mostly.) "

>

I agree. As a child I learned the proper etiquette but thought some

things were fussy and an attempt to make a separation between the

ones who thought they were high class, above others. I refused to do

certain things.

If I were interviewing I would look at etiquette on the part of an

interviewee as possibly being respect on their part, though depending

on how they were doing it (respect? or fakely sucking up?).

I always look at how people treat the waiter. I know some forget

they're a person, so I'm not dogmatic about it, but I do notice it

and if someone is very nice to the waiter, I look at that person in a

much more favorable light than if they aren't.

As to smacking of food...ugh.

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I've been to Door County. It is beautiful up there, and some of my

best memories come from a time I spent up there for a week with my

parents and a friend of the family.

Tom

Administrator

Well you would like my father's restaurant. He has a room for

families with children and they are required to sit there, like it or

leave! Some love it, some hate it (both on the parents' side and the

patrons without kids' side.) If you ever go to Door County, Wisconsin

(the getaway place for many Chicagoans) it is there.

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You might not look favorably on me. I don't like waiters or waitresses

that are too attentive.

They should take my order, bring my food, make sure the water glasses

are filled, give me my check, and that's it.

I hate when I am having a deep conversation with someone and a waiter

or waitress will ask if everything is okay. If it wasn't I would call

them over and tell them so. And furthermore, everything was fine UNTIL

I was interrupted.

I would make a poor waiter I suppose. I can remember reading in one of

the forums I used to belong to that an Aspie got fired as a waiter

because he treated his customers EXACTLY the way I like to be treated

by waiters and waitresses in restaurants.

I think I told him that if I were filthy rich, I'd hire him as my

personal waiter.

Tom

Administrator

I always look at how people treat the waiter. I know some forget

they're a person, so I'm not dogmatic about it, but I do notice it

and if someone is very nice to the waiter, I look at that person in a

much more favorable light than if they aren't.

As to smacking of food...ugh.

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>

> " You might not look favorably on me. I don't like waiters or

waitresses

> that are too attentive. "

The best ones are those that you don't even know they are there, and

who know the right time to come by, unobtrusive and efficient. They're

usually at the finer restaurants though. For everyday dining, we're

stuck with whatever we get!

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>

> " I've been to Door County. It is beautiful up there, and some of my

> best memories come from a time I spent up there for a week with my

> parents and a friend of the family. "

I love it. Even though it's a resort area, it's still beautiful. The

locals fight to keep it that way.

I know the city where you live must be crowded--it was in 1980 when I

worked there one summer (my parents had an office there). I'm sure you

feel the need to get away often.

>

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I'm got some of the earmuff style ear-protectors too. I got my at the TruValue hardware store though. They are really nice to have if the neighbor's dog gets barking or whatever. I also have a folding travel pair that I take on trips with me.

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I have ear protectors that people usually wear when using heavy

machinery. They are good for getting rid of most sounds, but you

always hear a few things. I would prefer ear protectors to not being

able to hear at all though. With them, I can hear when I want and

not hear when I don't want.

Tom

Administrator

Ear-protectors (a good thing)...Don't recall if I mentioned 'em.

Bought some ear-silencers two days ago. Seven dollars plus

change at the big chinese goods importer emporium (*whisper*

initials W-M). It's kind of surprising to me just how very much less

stressful now it is to be outside with all the traffic,

construction, and other noises constantly roaring. Should have

bought these decades ago. With earplugs on the other hand, well I

had lots of ear infections as a child and a couple of nasty ones as

an adult too. So I'm paranoid about earplugs. So far the ear-

protectors are pretty comfortable. Sure they look really geeky, but

that sort of thing doesn't bother me at all.

Heph

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The ear-protectors are rated to protect against a certain level of decibels, most of them being about 25 dB rated. So, they won't give you perfect silence, but they will take the edge off of a lot of noise.

I've got a set of bud type headphones that fit in the ear. When traveling if the noise is really a problem, then I will use those too, listening to whatever I am in the mood for at the moment. The various MP3 players are good for that since you can have all different kinds of music in one machine and not all the CDs, even though I back up all the music on CD anyway in case something happens.

Celtic music is actually more the root of many different kinds of music. In the US, Celtic music brought over by the Scots-Irish who settled in the Appalachian Mountains first evolved into Bluegrass and then into Country music. It also had an influence on early Rock and Roll, certain artists at any rate. Metallica even made a really good mix of the Irish song, Whiskey in the Jar.

Bums in the stations are a real problem. I prefer to travel by train and there are some stations that have plenty of them in there. At the Philadelphia station, really nice architecturally, one of them tried to steal one of my bags. Fortunately it was heavier than he thought and I had been paying attention, so he dropped it and ran. New Orleans was bad too with the bums hitting people up for money and such. The Chicago and ville Florida stations were nice though.

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In a message dated 8/27/2006 6:13:32 PM Eastern Standard Time, no_reply writes:

When you are middle or lower class, you tend to care less about social rules but more about religion (when was the last time you say Trump at a Bible Belt tent revival) and staying within the law, because getting caught breaking the law could mean lawsuits or legal expenses you cannot afford. Morals and ethics tend to be obeyed more among the middle and lower classes too.Tom

I'm not so sure that the lower and middle classes are really any more noble than the upper classes. Sure many of them go to church and all that, but there are also a lot of hypocrites out there too. There are also plenty of wild and drunken lower class people out there too.

I think the rich have it tougher because there are few of them compared to the rest of society. Because of that, they are in the spotlight more and so anything they do will get reported and paraded around in front of the masses who love to see the mighty fall.

They also have greater temptations. Their money can buy them almost anything they want, including influence and power. Those two temptations can be quickly overwhelming and can cause one to became a very unpleasant person. It can also cause a few people to have power far beyond reason, especially in this day of mass media.

I think the saying that "it is easier for a camel to walk through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter Heaven" refers to this. With more money comes an increased number of temptations. With the power that wealth brings, it becomes easy to think that the rules no longer apply to oneself and they can do as they please. So in that regard, they are more likely to be unrepentantly sinful.

Even so, the lower classes have their many temptations as well and I'm sure there are plenty of them who are just as much unrepentant sinners as the rich.

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Re: Ear-silencers Yes, you do always hear a few things. I'm still trying to figure out- it seems so far at least they more effectively screen out conversations that are farther away- but that isn't making sense to me somehow. Recently I've tried sliding the wires for some earphones that fit inside the ear underneath the huge-ish ear-silencers. So far I like playing on repeat "The Prophecy" from the Lord of the Rings soundtrack. -Quiet and smooth it is. I also find the "celtic" music of Lorenna McKenna pretty soothing, but it is definitely more wake-up. ("Celtic" really seems to be a hodgepodge of many different folk music styles?) They tend to help smooth out the noises getting in through the ear-silencers. I'm actually pretty calm waiting for buses at the bus terminal stations now! Huge improvement. I used to use some of Steve Halpern's music to go to sleep by- as kind of white noise. (Finding white noise

on the internet is actually kind of weird- they charge a lot of money for it!) But as nna nna Danna used to say on Saturday Night Live- It's always sumthing! Last evening someone, a nice enough lady I suppose, sat down on the bench at the station and started asking me questions about when the buses would arrive and so on! And me with these huge ear-silencers on my head. I could hardly believe it! I kept them on and pretended to hear only every fourth word or so and she kept on yakking on. Ah well. The bus station has problems with homeless people hanging out there and sleeping. The homeless who are drunks are really the problem, since they try to find corners and then just nod off and fall off of benches and so on. So everybody suffers (sigh). They don't allow you to close your eyes for more than a few seconds before tapping you on the shoulder. Anyway- I'm searching for some heavy

wrap-around opaque-ish sunglasses that will fit over my regular glasses. (I'm extremely near-sighted, basically blind without glasses.) If I had the resources in fact, I'd want to create some such sunglasses with a little digital readout clock on the inside to let me know when the bus is due to arrive. Heph environmental1st2003 <no_reply > wrote: I have ear protectors that people

usually wear when using heavy machinery. They are good for getting rid of most sounds, but you always hear a few things. I would prefer ear protectors to not being able to hear at all though. With them, I can hear when I want and not hear when I don't want.TomAdministratorEar-protectors (a good thing)...Don't recall if I mentioned 'em. Bought some ear-silencers two days ago. Seven dollars plus change at the big chinese goods importer emporium (*whisper* initials W-M). It's kind of surprising to me just how very much less stressful now it is to be outside with all the traffic, construction, and other noises constantly roaring. Should have bought these decades ago. With earplugs on the other hand, well I had lots of ear infections

as a child and a couple of nasty ones as an adult too. So I'm paranoid about earplugs. So far the ear-protectors are pretty comfortable. Sure they look really geeky, but that sort of thing doesn't bother me at all. Heph Hephaestus Clubfoothttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hephaestushttp://www.pantheon.org/articles/h/hephaestus.htmlhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kabeiroi

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In a message dated 8/30/2006 5:30:04 PM Eastern Standard Time, lemnosforge@... writes:

I had one kind of super-rich friend in my life. He was always worried about things like getting kidnapped, frivolous lawsuits to go after his money, women going after his money, and phony friends. He was the only person I ever met who always calculated out down to the penny the amount everyone owed on the restaurant bill, and even to the proportions owed for the tip. Nice guy, but in his case at least I think money was more of a burden than anything else.

Heph

This can be very true. I've heard it said that a problem many of the rich people have is that making money becomes almost like an addiction. They've already got more money than they know what to do with, but they can't help scrambling for more.

I can also see your friend's point of view. I'm not super rich by any stretch, but I do own a fair amount of land. I'm always worried about some gold digger trying to get her hands on it. Kidnapping doesn't really enter into it though because I live simply and most people would have no idea about my assets unless I tell them. Legal troubles are why I have set up a Limited Liability Corporation (LLC) for my assets and business. That way, if anyone tried to sue me, it would affect the LLC and as such they couldn't hurt me too badly and certainly couldn't take any of the land. As for tips, I usually don't worry too much about it. If the service was poor or surly, they get 10% if anything. If service was great, I'll tip 20%. In either case, I just ballpark the figure and don't bother too much about being exact.

As for phony friends, I've never had that problem. Like I said, people don't know about me unless I tell them. Since I live and act just like everyone else, no one has any reason to figure me as being a potential mark. Well, a couple of muggers did and they regretted it, but false friends, no. Besides, even though I am laid back, I'm still fairly suspicious of strangers. Its not easy to get me to trust you. Sure I'll talk to people and maybe have guests and such, but that doesn't mean I'm not still holding back from them a bit. Most have never noticed that though.

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I had one kind of super-rich friend in my life. He was always worried about things like getting kidnapped, frivolous lawsuits to go after his money, women going after his money, and phony friends. He was the only person I ever met who always calculated out down to the penny the amount everyone owed on the restaurant bill, and even to the proportions owed for the tip. Nice guy, but in his case at least I think money was more of a burden than anything else. Heph VISIGOTH@... wrote: In a message dated 8/27/2006 6:13:32 PM Eastern Standard Time, no_reply writes: When you are middle or lower class, you tend to care less about social rules but more about religion (when was the last time you say Trump at a Bible Belt tent revival) and staying within the law, because getting caught breaking the law could mean lawsuits or legal expenses you cannot afford. Morals and ethics tend to be obeyed more among the middle and lower classes too.Tom I'm not so sure that the lower and middle classes are really any more noble than the upper classes. Sure many of them go to church and all that, but there

are also a lot of hypocrites out there too. There are also plenty of wild and drunken lower class people out there too. I think the rich have it tougher because there are few of them compared to the rest of society. Because of that, they are in the spotlight more and so anything they do will get reported and paraded around in front of the masses who love to see the mighty fall. They also have greater temptations. Their money can buy them almost anything they want, including influence and power. Those two temptations can be quickly overwhelming and can cause one to became a very unpleasant person. It can also cause a few people to have power far beyond reason, especially in this day of mass media. I think the saying that "it is easier for a camel to walk through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter Heaven" refers to this. With more money comes an increased number of

temptations. With the power that wealth brings, it becomes easy to think that the rules no longer apply to oneself and they can do as they please. So in that regard, they are more likely to be unrepentantly sinful. Even so, the lower classes have their many temptations as well and I'm sure there are plenty of them who are just as much unrepentant sinners as the rich. Hephaestus Clubfoothttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hephaestushttp://www.pantheon.org/articles/h/hephaestus.htmlhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kabeiroi

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>

> " Re: Ear-silencers

>

> Yes, you do always hear a few things. I'm still trying to figure

out- it seems so far at least they more effectively screen out

conversations that are farther away- but that isn't making sense to

me somehow. "

Sharper Image has some that are supposed to cut out all noise, but

they are expensive.

>

> " I also find the " celtic " music of Lorenna McKenna pretty soothing,

but it is definitely more wake-up. "

Me too, and I really like Lorenna McKenna, but I could never really

find any sort of music more soothing than silence, and can't have

music in my ears like that.

" But as nna nna Danna used to say on Saturday Night Live-

It's always sumthing! "

:) Love Gilda and love Gene Wilder too. He was so broken up by her

death, sad.

" If I had the resources in fact, I'd want to create some such

sunglasses with a little digital readout clock on the inside to let

me know when the bus is due to arrive. "

I read about glasses like that in a sci-fi book. Was it Snowcrash?

>

>

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In a message dated 8/31/2006 9:05:54 AM Eastern Standard Time, mikecarrie01@... writes:

Sharper Image has some that are supposed to cut out all noise, but they are expensive.

They don't really work that well. I've tried them in the store and didn't really notice any difference. The things work by registering outside noise and canceling it with a different set of sound waves that have the effect of muting it. However, that works best with steady noises like jet engines and like and not so much for sudden noises like speech or barking dogs. When I tried them one, there was some muting, but not much more than could be accounted for by the earphones alone. It had not effect that I could tell on voices or the street noise.

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That's probably why he is rich. He saved every penny.

Tom

Administrator

He was the only person I ever met who always calculated out down to

the penny the amount everyone owed on the restaurant bill, and even to

the proportions owed for the tip.

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