Re: pondering sleeping arrangements

[Guest guest]

Jodi,

As far as I'm concerned, there is no benefit to sleeping with your 10

year old. by the way....THIS IS NOT ABOUT INCEST!!! No offense, just

wanted to make that clear. Its about my son simply not wanting to stay

in his own bed. Last night he wouldn't stay in his bed and he woke up

at 3 AM and started making noise, jumping and flapping cause I told him

to go to his room. Then he woke up my daughter and she had to come to

my bed so she could get some rest.

I can't lock him up in his room,and I can't lock the door to my room

cause he'll knock and scream until I open it. This is a very touchy

subject and difficult to remedy. The only thing I haven't tried is

moving myself to his room until he falls asleep.

Good luck....I suggest you start trying now that he's young. Hopefully

we'll find more answers.

Sylvia

>

> It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping with

> their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I can't

> help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me. is

four

> and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this long

> before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone. Please

> enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement after

> puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi

>

[Guest guest]

INCEST??? WHAT THE HECK happened to you as a kid? Please go googgle

some books on Co sleeping and the family bed! I know for my family it

is all about sleep and many Native American familes do so. AND in Japan

space is so small that they sleep as we do a bunch of futon mats on the

floor. We are in our own mats just near each other. Same as my folks

did.

>

> It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping with

> their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I can't

> help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me. is

four

> and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this long

> before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone. Please

> enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement after

> puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi

>

[Guest guest]

Me again! We also know that the kids try to sleep in there rooms one

has night terrors and one can not sleep all night by himself. The ruld

is 9:30 in YOUR bed IF you need to your mat is on the floor. OK? Now

that is just us.

>

> It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping with

> their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I can't

> help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me. is

four

> and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this long

> before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone. Please

> enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement after

> puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi

>

[Guest guest]

On a regular basis would make me wonder..... My older kids will sleep with me usually when they are really sad or when Dad goes on deployment - but even so they will lay on top of the blankets because they say it is "icky" lol.Jeff and Jodi <jjkgardenier@...> wrote: It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping with their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I can't help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me. is four and still sleeping with us. I'm

hoping to wean him from this long before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone. Please enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement after puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi Life may not be the party we asked for - but while we're here, let's dance!

Be a better Globetrotter. Get better travel answers from someone who knows. Answers - Check it out.

[Guest guest]

Thank you for explaining. I honestly wasn't out to cause trouble.

I was just being concerned about kids. I can understand your point

of view. Jodi

>

>

> No Jodi. No incest. You know, there is a family communal Love

that is very

> wonderful and special. Just because we may equate beds with sex

doesn't

> mean that's anything other than our culture, a repressed and

perverted and

> willful one far as I can see, and it doesn't appear to be working

all that well.

>

> When a family is in communion ... I'm not sure the right words,

but there is

> this Love that just makes you want to do things for one another.

>

> Actually, one doesn't have to be a family to be in communion, as

ideally we

> can feel that way about everyone. All of this is about Love, not

about sex,

> although we do seem to have the two confused.

>

> Love,

> Francine

>

> p.s. Recommending The Family Bed.

>

> p.p.s. People even associate breastfeeding with sex, and may act

as if it

> should be done in a secretive or hidden manner. Not kids

though! I can

> remember little kids coming up and practically putting their

faces on my boob when

> I'd be nursing. " Whatcha doin? " They could feel the Love.

That's the only

> real attraction.

>

> In a message dated 8/13/2007 12:01:29 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

> jjkgardenier@... writes:

>

>

>

>

> It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping

with

> their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I

can't

> help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me. is

four

> and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this long

> before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone.

Please

> enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement

after

> puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> ************************************** Get a sneak peek of the all-

new AOL at

> http://discover.aol.com/memed/aolcom30tour

>

[Guest guest]

Yah, we used to feel that way all cuddled up in front of the TV in the olden days, 2 of my sons and my daughter. We had two sofas, and my daughter cuddled up with me, and the boys took the other sofa, but did not cuddle. Usually we had a large bowl of pop corn, and munched and cuddled, and communed together.

Now I don't think we could do it, too many SEXUAL references on those TV sitcoms these days, I would have been sooo embarrassed sitting here with my sons with them talking about erections, etc. no way! Such things were not mentioned when I was growing up, and not between my kids or I either.

I can't believe those ED ads they have now, erectile dysfunction, if you are hard more than four hours call the doctor. Aaaaa!

Times have changed, but cuddling is still nice. I remember when my daughter reached a certain age she just stopped doing it, I tried to entice her back beside me, but it never happened again, about age 10 or 11 I guess. ; 0 (

Carolyn

Re: pondering sleeping arrangements

No Jodi. No incest. You know, there is a family communal Love that is very wonderful and special. Just because we may equate beds with sex doesn't mean that's anything other than our culture, a repressed and perverted and willful one far as I can see, and it doesn't appear to be working all that well.

When a family is in communion ... I'm not sure the right words, but there is this Love that just makes you want to do things for one another.

Actually, one doesn't have to be a family to be in communion, as ideally we can feel that way about everyone. All of this is about Love, not about sex, although we do seem to have the two confused.

Love,

Francine

p.s. Recommending The Family Bed.

p.p.s. People even associate breastfeeding with sex, and may act as if it should be done in a secretive or hidden manner. Not kids though! I can remember little kids coming up and practically putting their faces on my boob when I'd be nursing. "Whatcha doin?" They could feel the Love. That's the only real attraction.

In a message dated 8/13/2007 12:01:29 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, jjkgardeniersbcglobal (DOT) net writes:

It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping with their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I can't help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me. is four and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this long before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone. Please enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement after puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi

Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com.

[Guest guest]

Cozying is what my God-granddaughter called it. We still sleep together when she comes to visit. And when her mom lived here, she and my daughter and I all slept together. (a lot purer probably than what was going on on dates before she came home at night!

Cuddling, cozying, much more comforting than sex, and more enduring.

Thank you Carolyn for your sweet reminiscences. Wonderful how the tender moments endure in our minds.

Love,

Francine

In a message dated 8/13/2007 5:47:53 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, charper777@... writes:

Yah, we used to feel that way all cuddled up in front of the TV in the olden days, 2 of my sons and my daughter. We had two sofas, and my daughter cuddled up with me, and the boys took the other sofa, but did not cuddle. Usually we had a large bowl of pop corn, and munched and cuddled, and communed together.

Now I don't think we could do it, too many SEXUAL references on those TV sitcoms these days, I would have been sooo embarrassed sitting here with my sons with them talking about erections, etc. no way! Such things were not mentioned when I was growing up, and not between my kids or I either.

I can't believe those ED ads they have now, erectile dysfunction, if you are hard more than four hours call the doctor. Aaaaa!

Times have changed, but cuddling is still nice. I remember when my daughter reached a certain age she just stopped doing it, I tried to entice her back beside me, but it never happened again, about age 10 or 11 I guess. ; 0 (

Carolyn

Re: pondering sleeping arrangements

No Jodi. No incest. You know, there is a family communal Love that is very wonderful and special. Just because we may equate beds with sex doesn't mean that's anything other than our culture, a repressed and perverted and willful one far as I can see, and it doesn't appear to be working all that well.

When a family is in communion ... I'm not sure the right words, but there is this Love that just makes you want to do things for one another.

Actually, one doesn't have to be a family to be in communion, as ideally we can feel that way about everyone. All of this is about Love, not about sex, although we do seem to have the two confused.

Love,

Francine

p.s. Recommending The Family Bed.

p.p.s. People even associate breastfeeding with sex, and may act as if it should be done in a secretive or hidden manner. Not kids though! I can remember little kids coming up and practically putting their faces on my boob when I'd be nursing. "Whatcha doin?" They could feel the Love. That's the only real attraction.

In a message dated 8/13/2007 12:01:29 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, jjkgardeniersbcglobal (DOT) net writes:

It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping with their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I can't help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me. is four and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this long before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone. Please enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement after puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi

Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com.

Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com.

[Guest guest]

I myself do not intentionally do the family bed it just seems to end up that way lol. I would rather at bedtime they all sleep in their own rooms on their own mainly because each of us needs our personal space and I always looked forward at laying in my bed and thinking over the day and things that we did or what not it calms me down and relaxes me but if I had all the kids in there no way am I relaxed lol .but either way I end up with michael sleeping on the love seat in my bedroom and rachie either falls asleep downstairs and i carry her to her bed or she will fall asleep in my bed cuddled with me,then I carry her to her bed (I cant do this with michael lol he is way to heavy) but during the night she wets the bed ( yea any ideas for that one ?she is 4 nt and wets the bed every night only 1 tme a night though )well she will then change and come out into my room .I would love to sleep on

my own but I do like it when they climb in bed with ya .

Now when I was married my x he could be a bit of a jerk ( understatement by the way lol)he would get upset when they would climb in at night. but in the morning we always had the kids climb in with us (usually on the weekends or during the summer during school wasnt able to lay about ) that was nice we would sit and chat with the kids and cuddle zerbert each other (not sure how that is spelt u know when u blow on the belly and make a loud noise)but it was nice way to start the day .in the evening and during the day depending on weather and which kid (right now my lil girl since she is only 4 ) we lay on the couch under a blanket and watch kids shows and the other kids sit on the couch and kind of just chill (well if the boys are cooperative that day and they arnt at school)

now my oldest son is 16.If he grew up with the family bed (he never really crawled in bed with me even before I married my x) but the way teenagers are today unless they grew up with it I really doubt they would sleep next to mom in the teen yrs .And imho after they reach a certain age they shouldnt be in the same bed.They are now at an age they need to be more on there own in that area.But with the kids who are not nt it may have a benefit to it if it helps them to get a good nights sleep,which is something they need if they dont get enough or the right sleep all hell breaks out well least in my house lol

On to the breast feeding I really do not have anything against it I think all women who are ABLE physically & mentally should do it.I tried to with my first son and I wasnt producing enough and he wouldnt latch on.I do not mind a woman breast feeding I do find it uncomfortable when my kids or I are out in public and a woman lets it all hang out ( there are some who nicely do it, but then there are some that boom look out boob in ur face lol ) what I get offended by with some of the breastfeeding issues is usually the treatment of non breastfeeding mothers by breast feeding moms or vice versa .It is like "cant we all just get along "lol ..

But I think it is a natural thing and very beautiful if done in a tasteful manner ( i saw a t shirt on a baby about 8 months old that said MOTHER SUCKER I felt that was kind of tacky ) God I am so sorry for the book I am actually pretty alert today kool for me i got some stuff done today

Vickie

Re: pondering sleeping arrangements

No Jodi. No incest. You know, there is a family communal Love that is very wonderful and special. Just because we may equate beds with sex doesn't mean that's anything other than our culture, a repressed and perverted and willful one far as I can see, and it doesn't appear to be working all that well.

When a family is in communion ... I'm not sure the right words, but there is this Love that just makes you want to do things for one another.

Actually, one doesn't have to be a family to be in communion, as ideally we can feel that way about everyone. All of this is about Love, not about sex, although we do seem to have the two confused.

Love,

Francine

p.s. Recommending The Family Bed.

p.p.s. People even associate breastfeeding with sex, and may act as if it should be done in a secretive or hidden manner. Not kids though! I can remember little kids coming up and practically putting their faces on my boob when I'd be nursing. "Whatcha doin?" They could feel the Love. That's the only real attraction.

In a message dated 8/13/2007 12:01:29 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, jjkgardenier@ sbcglobal. net writes:

It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping with their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I can't help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me. is four and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this long before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone. Please enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement after puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi

Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com.

Park yourself in front of a world of choices in alternative vehicles.Visit the Auto Green Center.

[Guest guest]

No incest but I've heard pleanty about it. I can see co-sleeping up

until puberty perhaps but when the hormones start raging I believe

the child needs to be in his or her own bed. It just doesn't seem

decent to me to have a teenager in bed with you over night. JMHO.

Jodi

> >

> > It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping

with

> > their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I

can't

> > help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me.

is

> four

> > and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this

long

> > before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone.

Please

> > enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement

after

> > puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi

> >

>

[Guest guest]

I just can't understand why any adult would wish to sleep with a

horney teenager. Also if I was to discover that my husband slept

with his Mom during his teen years I would be weirded out to say the

least. I'm just being honest here and not intending to offend

anybody. Sorry if I have. Jodi

> > >

> > > It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children

sleeping

> with

> > > their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I

> can't

> > > help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me.

> is

> > four

> > > and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this

> long

> > > before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone.

> Please

> > > enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping

arrangement

> after

> > > puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

I just can't understand why any adult would wish to sleep with a

horney teenager. Also if I was to discover that my husband slept

with his Mom during his teen years I would be weirded out to say the

least. I'm just being honest here and not intending to offend

anybody. Sorry if I have. Jodi

> > >

> > > It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children

sleeping

> with

> > > their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I

> can't

> > > help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me.

> is

> > four

> > > and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this

> long

> > > before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone.

> Please

> > > enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping

arrangement

> after

> > > puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Gosh Jodi, haven't you heard of teenage boys and long showers? Some folks like to enjoy each other's near presence, maybe talk, and sleep.

Anyway, little kids are often experimenting anyway. It doesn't take 'hormones'.

The point is that life isn't all about sex, it's about the other 99.9 percent: Love.

That's how I see it.

FrancineIn a message dated 8/14/2007 6:36:28 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, jjkgardenier@... writes:

No incest but I've heard pleanty about it. I can see co-sleeping up until puberty perhaps but when the hormones start raging I believe the child needs to be in his or her own bed. It just doesn't seem decent to me to have a teenager in bed with you over night. JMHO. Jodi > >> > It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping with > > their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I can't > > help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me. is > four > > and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this long > > before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone. Please > > enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement after > > puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi> >>

Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com.

[Guest guest]

My sone co-slept until 4 or 5. Then we broke it slowly. It this common

with AS kids?

heidi

From: " Jeff and Jodi " <jjkgardenier@...>

Reply-Autism and Aspergers Treatment

Autism and Aspergers Treatment

Subject: Re: pondering sleeping arrangements

Date: Tue, 14 Aug 2007 10:35:18 -0000

No incest but I've heard pleanty about it. I can see co-sleeping up

until puberty perhaps but when the hormones start raging I believe

the child needs to be in his or her own bed. It just doesn't seem

decent to me to have a teenager in bed with you over night. JMHO.

Jodi

> >

> > It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping

with

> > their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I

can't

> > help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me.

is

> four

> > and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this

long

> > before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone.

Please

> > enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement

after

> > puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi

> >

>

_________________________________________________________________

Find a local pizza place, movie theater, and more….then map the best route!

http://maps.live.com/default.aspx?v=2 & ss=yp.bars~yp.pizza~yp.movie%20theater & cp=\

42.358996~-71.056691 & style=r & lvl=13 & tilt=-90 & dir=0 & alt=-1000 & scene=950607 & encTyp\

e=1 & FORM=MGAC01

[Guest guest]

p.s. As one long-term nurser in our La Leche group said to the ped. who asked her if her 3-year-old nursing son was still going to be interested in the female breast at 18: "He sure will, and it won't be mine!

Someone's son might indeed be horny, and it wouldn't be his mother he'd be dreaming about, but some cute teenager.

Smiling.

In a message dated 8/14/2007 1:34:45 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, sunrose101@... writes:

Gosh Jodi, haven't you heard of teenage boys and long showers? Some folks like to enjoy each other's near presence, maybe talk, and sleep.

Anyway, little kids are often experimenting anyway. It doesn't take 'hormones'.

The point is that life isn't all about sex, it's about the other 99.9 percent: Love.

That's how I see it.

FrancineIn a message dated 8/14/2007 6:36:28 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, jjkgardeniersbcglobal (DOT) net writes:

No incest but I've heard pleanty about it. I can see co-sleeping up until puberty perhaps but when the hormones start raging I believe the child needs to be in his or her own bed. It just doesn't seem decent to me to have a teenager in bed with you over night. JMHO. Jodi > >> > It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping with > > their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I can't > > help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me. is > four > > and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this long > > before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone. Please > > enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement after > > puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi> >>

Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com.

Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com.

[Guest guest]

You got me on this one Vickie: zerbert?

Your book was interesting. Glad you had a good day.

Francine

In a message dated 8/14/2007 12:36:35 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, blackfoot124@... writes:

I myself do not intentionally do the family bed it just seems to end up that way lol. I would rather at bedtime they all sleep in their own rooms on their own mainly because each of us needs our personal space and I always looked forward at laying in my bed and thinking over the day and things that we did or what not it calms me down and relaxes me but if I had all the kids in there no way am I relaxed lol .but either way I end up with michael sleeping on the love seat in my bedroom and rachie either falls asleep downstairs and i carry her to her bed or she will fall asleep in my bed cuddled with me,then I carry her to her bed (I cant do this with michael lol he is way to heavy) but during the night she wets the bed ( yea any ideas for that one ?she is 4 nt and wets the bed every night only 1 tme a night though )well she will then change and come out into my room .I would love to sleep on my own but I do like it when they climb in bed with ya .

Now when I was married my x he could be a bit of a jerk ( understatement by the way lol)he would get upset when they would climb in at night. but in the morning we always had the kids climb in with us (usually on the weekends or during the summer during school wasnt able to lay about ) that was nice we would sit and chat with the kids and cuddle zerbert each other (not sure how that is spelt u know when u blow on the belly and make a loud noise)but it was nice way to start the day .in the evening and during the day depending on weather and which kid (right now my lil girl since she is only 4 ) we lay on the couch under a blanket and watch kids shows and the other kids sit on the couch and kind of just chill (well if the boys are cooperative that day and they arnt at school)

now my oldest son is 16.If he grew up with the family bed (he never really crawled in bed with me even before I married my x) but the way teenagers are today unless they grew up with it I really doubt they would sleep next to mom in the teen yrs .And imho after they reach a certain age they shouldnt be in the same bed.They are now at an age they need to be more on there own in that area.But with the kids who are not nt it may have a benefit to it if it helps them to get a good nights sleep,which is something they need if they dont get enough or the right sleep all hell breaks out well least in my house lol

On to the breast feeding I really do not have anything against it I think all women who are ABLE physically & mentally should do it.I tried to with my first son and I wasnt producing enough and he wouldnt latch on.I do not mind a woman breast feeding I do find it uncomfortable when my kids or I are out in public and a woman lets it all hang out ( there are some who nicely do it, but then there are some that boom look out boob in ur face lol ) what I get offended by with some of the breastfeeding issues is usually the treatment of non breastfeeding mothers by breast feeding moms or vice versa .It is like "cant we all just get along "lol ..

But I think it is a natural thing and very beautiful if done in a tasteful manner ( i saw a t shirt on a baby about 8 months old that said MOTHER SUCKER I felt that was kind of tacky ) God I am so sorry for the book I am actually pretty alert today kool for me i got some stuff done today

Vickie

Re: pondering sleeping arrangements

No Jodi. No incest. You know, there is a family communal Love that is very wonderful and special. Just because we may equate beds with sex doesn't mean that's anything other than our culture, a repressed and perverted and willful one far as I can see, and it doesn't appear to be working all that well.

When a family is in communion ... I'm not sure the right words, but there is this Love that just makes you want to do things for one another.

Actually, one doesn't have to be a family to be in communion, as ideally we can feel that way about everyone. All of this is about Love, not about sex, although we do seem to have the two confused.

Love,

Francine

p.s. Recommending The Family Bed.

p.p.s. People even associate breastfeeding with sex, and may act as if it should be done in a secretive or hidden manner. Not kids though! I can remember little kids coming up and practically putting their faces on my boob when I'd be nursing. "Whatcha doin?" They could feel the Love. That's the only real attraction.

In a message dated 8/13/2007 12:01:29 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, jjkgardenier@ sbcglobal. net writes:

It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping with their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I can't help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me. is four and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this long before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone. Please enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement after puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi

Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com.

Park yourself in front of a world of choices in alternative vehicles.Visit the Auto Green Center.

Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com.

[Guest guest]

Not trying to be mean but everyone has their own opinions and we shouldnt talk down to them for it..I can completly understand what Jodi is saying .teenage boys are basically grown up ,yes there are long showers and yes all kids experiment but in regards to that there are also wet dreams now I dont want to wake up wet from pee when the little one pees the bed so I sure as hell dont want to wake up with wet from that. Okay family beds are nothing to do with sex fully understand that .

But when puberty issues arise being developed ,having wet dreams and the like I feel they should not be in bed with their moms & /or dads .To me there is a line that needs to be drawn in the family bed issues and the breastfeeding issues (there are some who breast feed and the child is 5 or 6 yrs old I know they say it is a bonding moment and makes them feel together ) my thought is cuddle on the couch etc... this has nothing to do with sex(although I have heard some mothers that got a bit of pleasure from it)

the one I remember was from a magazine ,do not remember her name, but she was breast feeding her like 14 month old and she got a tug of pleasure which scared her so she called a hotline to ask if this was normal and so forth and they reported her for sexual abuse and she was being sent to jail for it now this had just happend when I read this article (i think it was back in 1992 ) so i do not know if they did send her to jail or if she was realeased.

my thought is when do you stop ?? now my son michael sleep in my room on a love seat i sleep across the room on my bed (thank god for my big room) i can see that or the sleeping bag on the floor but in the same bed no he has laid in my bed i give him 5 mins (usually after a night terror )then he goes back to his own.

but I feel at this age (he will be 12 in oct ) he should be in his own room .He needs his room and I need mine.

but again this is jmho

Vickie

Re: Re: pondering sleeping arrangements

Gosh Jodi, haven't you heard of teenage boys and long showers? Some folks like to enjoy each other's near presence, maybe talk, and sleep.

Anyway, little kids are often experimenting anyway. It doesn't take 'hormones'.

The point is that life isn't all about sex, it's about the other 99.9 percent: Love.

That's how I see it.

FrancineIn a message dated 8/14/2007 6:36:28 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, jjkgardenier@ sbcglobal. net writes:

No incest but I've heard pleanty about it. I can see co-sleeping up until puberty perhaps but when the hormones start raging I believe the child needs to be in his or her own bed. It just doesn't seem decent to me to have a teenager in bed with you over night. JMHO. Jodi > >> > It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping with > > their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I can't > > help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me. is > four > > and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this long > > before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone. Please > > enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement after > > puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi> >>

Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com.

Ready for the edge of your seat? Check out tonight's top picks on TV.

[Guest guest]

Life isn't all about sex. I'm not an idiot. But when you are going

through puberty you get sexual urges. Teenagers hormones go crazy.

They wake up in the night. I guess Mom can wake them up and say " Hey,

you need to get in the shower! " Adults should not be sleeping with

teens IMHO. Perhaps a nap on the couch or watching tv on the bed but

not over night sleeping. Up until puberty I have NO problem with co-

sleeping! But after they become a sexual human being they need their

space. Jodi

[Guest guest]

we called them zerberts but i think some areas they are called rasberries lol i dotn know they are funny you just bare the belly and blow real hard and it makes a funny noise it doesnt hurt it kind of tickels and the noise the kids love it u can do it on the arm or where ever just u need a bigger area of skin not like a hand or wrist type area lol

the kids do it to me or i them and they think it is hysterical. you can do it to urself but there aint no fun in that lol also my son will do it into his hands when they are like palm to palm laying out blow into that he thinks it sounds like he is farting lol

Re: pondering sleeping arrangements

No Jodi. No incest. You know, there is a family communal Love that is very wonderful and special. Just because we may equate beds with sex doesn't mean that's anything other than our culture, a repressed and perverted and willful one far as I can see, and it doesn't appear to be working all that well.

When a family is in communion ... I'm not sure the right words, but there is this Love that just makes you want to do things for one another.

Actually, one doesn't have to be a family to be in communion, as ideally we can feel that way about everyone. All of this is about Love, not about sex, although we do seem to have the two confused.

Love,

Francine

p.s. Recommending The Family Bed.

p.p.s. People even associate breastfeeding with sex, and may act as if it should be done in a secretive or hidden manner. Not kids though! I can remember little kids coming up and practically putting their faces on my boob when I'd be nursing. "Whatcha doin?" They could feel the Love. That's the only real attraction.

In a message dated 8/13/2007 12:01:29 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, jjkgardenier@ sbcglobal. net writes:

It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping with their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I can't help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me. is four and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this long before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone. Please enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement after puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi

Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com.

Park yourself in front of a world of choices in alternative vehicles.Visit the Auto Green Center.

Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com.

Be a better Heartthrob. Get better relationship answers from someone who knows. Answers - Check it out.

[Guest guest]

I need to let this subject go. I started this thread hoping for

understanding. I've come to the point where I'm being offensive.

I ask for forgiveness to anyone I have offended. There are just some

things in this life I will not understand and no book is going to

convince me that an adult sleeping overnight with a teen is okay. I

would like to make it clear that I have NOT accused anyone of incest.

Jodi

[Guest guest]

Jodi,

In order to be understanding one must have an open mind. What works for you or me is not necessarily what will work for all. I do sleep with my 12 year old son. It is comforting to him, as cognitively he is about 4. Personally, it matters not who agrees or disagrees with me as I am the one who walks in my shoes and bears the responsibility of my actions.

There is a difference between understanding (open minded) and convincing (closed minded).

I respect you for knowing when enough is enough.

Jill

-----Original Message-----From: Autism and Aspergers Treatment [mailto:Autism and Aspergers Treatment ]On Behalf Of Jeff and JodiSent: Tuesday, August 14, 2007 7:31 PMAutism and Aspergers Treatment Subject: Re: pondering sleeping arrangements

I need to let this subject go. I started this thread hoping for understanding. I've come to the point where I'm being offensive.I ask for forgiveness to anyone I have offended. There are just some things in this life I will not understand and no book is going to convince me that an adult sleeping overnight with a teen is okay. I would like to make it clear that I have NOT accused anyone of incest. Jodi

[Guest guest]

You werent being offensive ,and you did not accuse anyone of incest.Everybody has there own opinions on this.I understand fully what you were trying to say about it.Some people will take offense no matter what,you at least tried to see their viewpoint they did not try to understand yours.

I agree that when they are teenagers no in bed with mommy and daddy or just one of them even. I even asked my son(16) if we had done the family bed do you think you would still want to sleep with mommy in the same bed when you are a teenager he said no that would be awkward and he would need his own space.Now I know some would counter it with well if they grew up with it they woulndt feel awkward but I really dont know if that is true. My kids are pretty loving and well other than one of the hfa sons who isnt very social.They all cuddled with me from childhood.

Now my 16 yr old doesnt cuddle now but he gives me hugs and tells me he loves me everyday even in front of freinds (I know hard to believe lol)so I feel they are more affectionate than some kids but he still thinks it would be awkward for both parent and kid. So I understand what u meant and I do not feel u were offensive in anyway and u did not acuse anyone of incest.Least I didnt take it that way.

there are just some subjects out there that no one will ever see eye to eye on . add this one to the list of them

religion

medication

spanking

breast vs bottle

working mom vs stay at home mom

home school vs public school

it isnt that their thoughts are wrong perse it is that what may be normal for some isnt for others and some people come across that if it isnt what they believe it is wrong.

they will nitpick and call names and make it sound like they are bad moms for doing things that way. now I am not saying that the people here do this it just soem times you can tell you touched a nerve by the way they answer back ,and sometimes the light jokes seem offending whether they werent meant to be

jmho

vickie

Re: pondering sleeping arrangements

I need to let this subject go. I started this thread hoping for understanding. I've come to the point where I'm being offensive.I ask for forgiveness to anyone I have offended. There are just some things in this life I will not understand and no book is going to convince me that an adult sleeping overnight with a teen is okay. I would like to make it clear that I have NOT accused anyone of incest. Jodi

Luggage? GPS? Comic books?

Check out fitting gifts for grads at Search.

[Guest guest]

I actually had someone tell me at a restaurant when I was nursing that I should do that in the bathroom. I called the manager over there and said I would be happy to if he had everyone else eat in the bathroom - my daughter was eating too! Needless to say I was asked to leave, and did so.Jeff and Jodi <jjkgardenier@...> wrote: Thank you for explaining. I honestly wasn't out to cause trouble. I was just being concerned about kids. I can understand your point of view. Jodi > > > No Jodi. No incest. You know, there is a family communal Love that is very > wonderful and special. Just because we may equate beds with sex doesn't > mean that's anything other than our culture, a repressed and perverted and > willful one far as I can see, and it doesn't appear to be working all that well. > > When a family is in communion ... I'm not sure the right words, but there is > this Love that just makes you want to do things for one another. > > Actually, one doesn't have to be a family to be in communion, as ideally we > can feel that way about everyone. All of this is about Love, not about sex, > although we do seem to have the two confused. > > Love, >

Francine > > p.s. Recommending The Family Bed. > > p.p.s. People even associate breastfeeding with sex, and may act as if it > should be done in a secretive or hidden manner. Not kids though! I can > remember little kids coming up and practically putting their faces on my boob when > I'd be nursing. "Whatcha doin?" They could feel the Love. That's the only > real attraction. > > In a message dated 8/13/2007 12:01:29 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, > jjkgardenier@... writes: > > > > > It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children sleeping with > their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I can't > help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me. is four > and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this long >

before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone. Please > enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping arrangement after > puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi > > > > > > > > > > ************************************** Get a sneak peek of the all- new AOL at > http://discover.aol.com/memed/aolcom30tour > Life may not be the party we asked for - but while we're here, let's dance!

Looking for a deal? Find great prices on flights and hotels with FareChase.

[Guest guest]

>

> I need to let this subject go. I started this thread hoping for

> understanding. I've come to the point where I'm being offensive.

> I ask for forgiveness to anyone I have offended. There are just some

> things in this life I will not understand and no book is going to

> convince me that an adult sleeping overnight with a teen is okay. I

> would like to make it clear that I have NOT accused anyone of incest.

> Jodi

>

I think that you are right Jodi. It is well known that men/teenage

boys commonly have erections in the morning. I think that this could be

very akward and embarrassing for everyone (especially the child) Also

I am overwhelmed already with the everyday tasks associated with

raising not only a son with aspergers but also a 2 year old daughter.

when you add to that taking care of the house and my husband I need a

break sometimes and bedtime is about all I get. I think of our bedroom

as our sanctuary. It is private and the kids are not allowed in there

even during the day. It is the only place they are not allowed and I

think my husband and I need this space to keep our marriage alive.

Kristi

[Guest guest]

But sadly in today's

society that's not how others see it. I believe that it's opening a

door for untrue accusations that could people into a lot of trouble

which is sad but that is the way that society has turned. Up until

puberty I think it's fine but after that no. I have NEVER had either

of my boys sleep in our bed since very very rarely between the ages of

1-2 and they are happy well adjusted children. JMO.

Bek

sunrose101@... wrote:

Gosh Jodi, haven't you heard of teenage boys and long showers?

Some folks like to enjoy each other's near presence, maybe talk, and

sleep.

Anyway, little kids are often experimenting anyway. It doesn't

take 'hormones'.

The point is that life isn't all about sex, it's about the other

99.9 percent: Love.

That's how I see it.

FrancineIn a message dated 8/14/2007 6:36:28 A.M. Eastern

Daylight Time, jjkgardeniersbcglobal (DOT) net writes:

No incest but I've heard pleanty about it. I can see co-sleeping

up

until puberty perhaps but when the hormones start raging I believe

the child needs to be in his or her own bed. It just doesn't seem

decent to me to have a teenager in bed with you over night. JMHO.

Jodi

> >

> > It has been on my mind the subject of teenaged children

sleeping

with

> > their parents on a regular basis. Not to accuse anyone but I

can't

> > help but wonder if incest is involved? It disturbs me.

is

> four

> > and still sleeping with us. I'm hoping to wean him from this

long

> > before he reaches puberty. I hope I haven't offended anyone.

Please

> > enlighten me if there is a benifit to this sleeping

arrangement

after

> > puberty. I want to understand. Thank you. Jodi

> >

>

Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com.

[Guest guest]

-------Original Message-------

From: Bek & Craig

Date: 18/08/2007 2:10:21 PM

But sadly in today's society that's not how others see it. I believe that it

s opening a door for untrue accusations that could people into a lot of

trouble which is sad but that is the way that society has turned. Up until

puberty I think it's fine but after that no. I have NEVER had either of my

boys sleep in our bed since very very rarely between the ages of 1-2 and

they are happy well adjusted children. JMO.

Bek

*****************************

We can't ignore the world around us. For most of history, in most places,

the whole family has slept in one bed or on rugs/mats all in the same room.

Europe has had separate beds for everyone for only a few hundred years -

except for the rich. Until last century it was common for all boys or

girls in a family to share one bed. Now every kid expects to have his/her

own room. Times change.