Guest guest Posted November 28, 2006 Report Share Posted November 28, 2006 I agree with Tim, plus it depends on what kind of relationship you have with your ex. A big consideration is: what purpose would it serve to tell him? And what harm could come from telling him? Does the benefit outweigh the potential damage? Your husband is trying to protect you from what could be a very stressful, and ultimately detrimental, situation. Assess the risks before taking action, and if you truly think that you will attain greater benefit by telling your ex than not, then go ahead. I told my ex, but he and I are the best of friends. We were married for 17 years, and he is negative. From a legal standpoint, your ex would 1) have to prove he was damaged, and 2) prove it was due to your negligence to even have a basis to bring an action to court, let along prevail. You could counter sue and claim HE infected YOU. From a pure " disclosure for safety's sake " point of view: if the ex IS infected, what are the chances of him inadvertently infecting others - such as children or other family members? You might feel like it weighs on your conscience to try and prevent the infection of others by your ex. Maybe you could " anonymously " disclose to him that he has possibly been exposed and should be tested. > I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new husband does > not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that I > could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical bills. > I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, > though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would > try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I > even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is > very paranoid about me saying anything, though. > > > > > > > Tim Parsons > > knoxville,tn 37931 > > 865-588-2465 x107 work > > > www.knoxville1.com > > > > --------------------------------- > Everyone is raving about the all-new beta. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 29, 2006 Report Share Posted November 29, 2006 I have thought about an anyomonous way of telling him. I am sure he has it (and gave it to me) because of his past IV drug use. However, my job also puts me in an "at-risk" category, so my current husband is worried that he will claim I infected him and try to sue me. Though I believe this is not likely, I don't even think my ex has the money for an attorney or court costs, my current husband says "why even open pandora's box? He can go to the dr. if he starts getting sick... we don't need to be involved." As for my relationship with my ex... I don't trust him as far as I could throw him. He is a drug addict. But morally, and ethically, should I still tell him? Is there any obligation? I KNOW he has to be infected. <marvindamartian05@...> wrote: I agree with Tim, plus it depends on what kind of relationship you have with your ex. A big consideration is: what purpose would it serve to tell him? And what harm could come from telling him?Does the benefit outweigh the potential damage?Your husband is trying to protect you from what could be a very stressful, and ultimately detrimental, situation. Assess the risks before taking action, and if you truly think that you will attain greater benefit by telling your ex than not, then go ahead.I told my ex, but he and I are the best of friends. We were married for 17 years, and he is negative.From a legal standpoint, your ex would 1) have to prove he was damaged, and 2) prove it was due to your negligence to even have a basis to bring an action to court, let along prevail. You could counter sue and claim HE infected YOU.From a pure "disclosure for safety's sake" point of view: if the ex IS infected, what are the chances of him inadvertently infecting others - such as children or other family members? You might feel like it weighs on your conscience to try and prevent the infection of others by your ex. Maybe you could "anonymously" disclose to him that he has possibly been exposed and should be tested.> I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new husband does > not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that I > could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical bills. > I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, > though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would > try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I > even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is > very paranoid about me saying anything, though.> > > > > > > Tim Parsons > > knoxville,tn 37931 > > 865-588-2465 x107 work> > > www.knoxville1.com> > > > ---------------------------------> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 29, 2006 Report Share Posted November 29, 2006 Kerri I thought about telling my ex husband also. He was a surgical tech, and well heck he might need to be tested also. But you know something there was a reason I divorced him. I DIDN"T like him much. LOL And he has had lots of physicals between our divorce and now, I bet if he has Hepatitis C he wouldn't tell me. So I don't let it worry me. Have to agree with your current hubbie. Don't open up pandora's box. Love JanetKerri Landress <kerrilandress@...> wrote: I have thought about an anyomonous way of telling him. I am sure he has it (and gave it to me) because of his past IV drug use. However, my job also puts me in an "at-risk" category, so my current husband is worried that he will claim I infected him and try to sue me. Though I believe this is not likely, I don't even think my ex has the money for an attorney or court costs, my current husband says "why even open pandora's box? He can go to the dr. if he starts getting sick... we don't need to be involved." As for my relationship with my ex... I don't trust him as far as I could throw him. He is a drug addict. But morally, and ethically, should I still tell him? Is there any obligation? I KNOW he has to be infected. <marvindamartian05 > wrote: I agree with Tim, plus it depends on what kind of relationship you have with your ex. A big consideration is: what purpose would it serve to tell him? And what harm could come from telling him?Does the benefit outweigh the potential damage?Your husband is trying to protect you from what could be a very stressful, and ultimately detrimental, situation. Assess the risks before taking action, and if you truly think that you will attain greater benefit by telling your ex than not, then go ahead.I told my ex, but he and I are the best of friends. We were married for 17 years, and he is negative.From a legal standpoint, your ex would 1) have to prove he was damaged, and 2) prove it was due to your negligence to even have a basis to bring an action to court, let along prevail. You could counter sue and claim HE infected YOU.From a pure "disclosure for safety's sake" point of view: if the ex IS infected, what are the chances of him inadvertently infecting others - such as children or other family members? You might feel like it weighs on your conscience to try and prevent the infection of others by your ex. Maybe you could "anonymously" disclose to him that he has possibly been exposed and should be tested.> I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new husband does > not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that I > could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical bills. > I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, > though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would > try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I > even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is > very paranoid about me saying anything, though.> > > > > > > Tim Parsons > > knoxville,tn 37931 > > 865-588-2465 x107 work> > > www.knoxville1.com> > > > ---------------------------------> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta. Take the ordinary things of life, and make them your own. Do the impossible with a smile Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 29, 2006 Report Share Posted November 29, 2006 As far as him being able to sue you for infecting him: in law there is a concept called the " doctrine of clean hands " . Your ex has " dirty hands " because he could just have easily given you the hep as you could have given it to him. If he were to try and sue you, you can show that his hands are not clean, he has risk factors, etc. The chances of him prevailing are slim. Now as to ethics: if you tell the ex, is there a chance of him trying to hurt you, physically? If so, then you should keep your safety in mind above any perceived moral obligation. Also, consider this: if you tell him, will he change his behavior, or take steps to avoid infecting others? If not, what's the point? > > I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new > husband does > > not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that > I > > could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical > bills. > > I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, > > though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would > > try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I > > even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is > > very paranoid about me saying anything, though. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Tim Parsons > > > > knoxville,tn 37931 > > > > 865-588-2465 x107 work > > > > > > www.knoxville1.com > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > > Everyone is raving about the all-new beta. > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Everyone is raving about the all-new beta. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 29, 2006 Report Share Posted November 29, 2006 I agree with ya Janet,, especially if there is ANY chance of retribution! One has to keep safe from ex's!Janet <doc_jade@...> wrote: Kerri I thought about telling my ex husband also. He was a surgical tech, and well heck he might need to be tested also. But you know something there was a reason I divorced him. I DIDN"T like him much. LOL And he has had lots of physicals between our divorce and now, I bet if he has Hepatitis C he wouldn't tell me. So I don't let it worry me. Have to agree with your current hubbie. Don't open up pandora's box. Love JanetKerri Landress <kerrilandress > wrote: I have thought about an anyomonous way of telling him. I am sure he has it (and gave it to me) because of his past IV drug use. However, my job also puts me in an "at-risk" category, so my current husband is worried that he will claim I infected him and try to sue me. Though I believe this is not likely, I don't even think my ex has the money for an attorney or court costs, my current husband says "why even open pandora's box? He can go to the dr. if he starts getting sick... we don't need to be involved." As for my relationship with my ex... I don't trust him as far as I could throw him. He is a drug addict. But morally, and ethically, should I still tell him? Is there any obligation? I KNOW he has to be infected. <marvindamartian05 > wrote: I agree with Tim, plus it depends on what kind of relationship you have with your ex. A big consideration is: what purpose would it serve to tell him? And what harm could come from telling him?Does the benefit outweigh the potential damage?Your husband is trying to protect you from what could be a very stressful, and ultimately detrimental, situation. Assess the risks before taking action, and if you truly think that you will attain greater benefit by telling your ex than not, then go ahead.I told my ex, but he and I are the best of friends. We were married for 17 years, and he is negative.From a legal standpoint, your ex would 1) have to prove he was damaged, and 2) prove it was due to your negligence to even have a basis to bring an action to court, let along prevail. You could counter sue and claim HE infected YOU.From a pure "disclosure for safety's sake" point of view: if the ex IS infected, what are the chances of him inadvertently infecting others - such as children or other family members? You might feel like it weighs on your conscience to try and prevent the infection of others by your ex. Maybe you could "anonymously" disclose to him that he has possibly been exposed and should be tested.> I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new husband does > not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that I > could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical bills. > I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, > though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would > try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I > even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is > very paranoid about me saying anything, though.> > > > > > > Tim Parsons > > knoxville,tn 37931 > > 865-588-2465 x107 work> > > www.knoxville1.com> > > > ---------------------------------> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta. Take the ordinary things of life, and make them your own. Do the impossible with a smile Jackie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 29, 2006 Report Share Posted November 29, 2006 well YOU MAY be right in that he gave it to you but he could only do that if you had blood to blood contact,, he maybe an IV drug user and still NOT have hcv! I was sure that my ex had it too,, and he did NOT.,,, If there is anyway he might hurt you, then I'd just leave it alone! If he goes to the doc when he doesnt feel well, they will find it at some point... you cannot put yourself at risk of harm just to make a point! There is no way you can do it anonymously because he will either think its some crackpot who has mistaken him for someone else,, or he will know its you later on when and if he finds out you have it,, and ppl DO talk,,, Trust your current hubby and just take care of YOU! Let him be responsible for himself,, you are not married to him any longer,, let it go hon,, for your own sake, let it go! jaxKerri Landress <kerrilandress@...> wrote: I have thought about an anyomonous way of telling him. I am sure he has it (and gave it to me) because of his past IV drug use. However, my job also puts me in an "at-risk" category, so my current husband is worried that he will claim I infected him and try to sue me. Though I believe this is not likely, I don't even think my ex has the money for an attorney or court costs, my current husband says "why even open pandora's box? He can go to the dr. if he starts getting sick... we don't need to be involved." As for my relationship with my ex... I don't trust him as far as I could throw him. He is a drug addict. But morally, and ethically, should I still tell him? Is there any obligation? I KNOW he has to be infected. <marvindamartian05 > wrote: I agree with Tim, plus it depends on what kind of relationship you have with your ex. A big consideration is: what purpose would it serve to tell him? And what harm could come from telling him?Does the benefit outweigh the potential damage?Your husband is trying to protect you from what could be a very stressful, and ultimately detrimental, situation. Assess the risks before taking action, and if you truly think that you will attain greater benefit by telling your ex than not, then go ahead.I told my ex, but he and I are the best of friends. We were married for 17 years, and he is negative.From a legal standpoint, your ex would 1) have to prove he was damaged, and 2) prove it was due to your negligence to even have a basis to bring an action to court, let along prevail. You could counter sue and claim HE infected YOU.From a pure "disclosure for safety's sake" point of view: if the ex IS infected, what are the chances of him inadvertently infecting others - such as children or other family members? You might feel like it weighs on your conscience to try and prevent the infection of others by your ex. Maybe you could "anonymously" disclose to him that he has possibly been exposed and should be tested.> I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new husband does > not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that I > could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical bills. > I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, > though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would > try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I > even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is > very paranoid about me saying anything, though.> > > > > > > Tim Parsons > > knoxville,tn 37931 > > 865-588-2465 x107 work> > > www.knoxville1.com> > > > ---------------------------------> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta. Jackie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 29, 2006 Report Share Posted November 29, 2006 How could he sue you even IF you did infect him??? YOU did NOT know you had it and in order for someone to sue you for negligence,, you would have had to have known you had it and then took NO steps to protect him,, so dont worry about his sueing you,,, you can say you got it from him too,, altho it is rarely if ever passed sexually,, it HAS to be blood to blood contact,,kerrilandress <kerrilandress@...> wrote: I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new husband does not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that I could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical bills. I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is very paranoid about me saying anything, though.Jackie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 29, 2006 Report Share Posted November 29, 2006 How could he sue you even IF you did infect him??? YOU did NOT know you had it and in order for someone to sue you for negligence,, you would have had to have known you had it and then took NO steps to protect him,, so dont worry about his sueing you,,, you can say you got it from him too,, altho it is rarely if ever passed sexually,, it HAS to be blood to blood contact,,kerrilandress <kerrilandress@...> wrote: I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new husband does not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that I could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical bills. I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is very paranoid about me saying anything, though.Jackie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 30, 2006 Report Share Posted November 30, 2006 Excellent answer!! Or as they say on Family Feud "Good Answer!!" I am a nerd, I know it. Hee Hee Love Janet <marvindamartian05@...> wrote: As far as him being able to sue you for infecting him: in law there is a concept called the "doctrine of clean hands". Your ex has "dirty hands" because he could just have easily given you the hep as you could have given it to him. If he were to try and sue you, you can show that his hands are not clean, he has risk factors, etc. The chances of him prevailing are slim.Now as to ethics: if you tell the ex, is there a chance of him trying to hurt you, physically? If so, then you should keep your safety in mind above any perceived moral obligation.Also, consider this: if you tell him, will he change his behavior, or take steps to avoid infecting others? If not, what's the point?> > I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new > husband does > > not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that > I > > could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical > bills. > > I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, > > though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would > > try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I > > even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is > > very paranoid about me saying anything, though.> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Tim Parsons > > > > knoxville,tn 37931 > > > > 865-588-2465 x107 work> > > > > > www.knoxville1.com> > > > > > > > ---------------------------------> > Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.> >> > > > > > > ---------------------------------> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.>Take the ordinary things of life, and make them your own. Do the impossible with a smile Access over 1 million songs - Music Unlimited. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 30, 2006 Report Share Posted November 30, 2006 Excellent answer!! Or as they say on Family Feud "Good Answer!!" I am a nerd, I know it. Hee Hee Love Janet <marvindamartian05@...> wrote: As far as him being able to sue you for infecting him: in law there is a concept called the "doctrine of clean hands". Your ex has "dirty hands" because he could just have easily given you the hep as you could have given it to him. If he were to try and sue you, you can show that his hands are not clean, he has risk factors, etc. The chances of him prevailing are slim.Now as to ethics: if you tell the ex, is there a chance of him trying to hurt you, physically? If so, then you should keep your safety in mind above any perceived moral obligation.Also, consider this: if you tell him, will he change his behavior, or take steps to avoid infecting others? If not, what's the point?> > I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new > husband does > > not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that > I > > could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical > bills. > > I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, > > though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would > > try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I > > even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is > > very paranoid about me saying anything, though.> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Tim Parsons > > > > knoxville,tn 37931 > > > > 865-588-2465 x107 work> > > > > > www.knoxville1.com> > > > > > > > ---------------------------------> > Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.> >> > > > > > > ---------------------------------> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.>Take the ordinary things of life, and make them your own. Do the impossible with a smile Access over 1 million songs - Music Unlimited. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 30, 2006 Report Share Posted November 30, 2006 Thanks. I'll take yours and my husband's advice. My ex will eventually find out about it... I don't need the added stress of dealing with him. We do have two kids together, but he doesn't see them because I have a court order against his visiting. He cannot lift the court order until he passes a drug test (which unfortuantly I don't think he ever will.) I've tried to help him for years... he's on his own about finding out he's infected.Jackie on <redjaxjm@...> wrote: well YOU MAY be right in that he gave it to you but he could only do that if you had blood to blood contact,, he maybe an IV drug user and still NOT have hcv! I was sure that my ex had it too,, and he did NOT.,,, If there is anyway he might hurt you, then I'd just leave it alone! If he goes to the doc when he doesnt feel well, they will find it at some point... you cannot put yourself at risk of harm just to make a point! There is no way you can do it anonymously because he will either think its some crackpot who has mistaken him for someone else,, or he will know its you later on when and if he finds out you have it,, and ppl DO talk,,, Trust your current hubby and just take care of YOU! Let him be responsible for himself,, you are not married to him any longer,, let it go hon,, for your own sake, let it go! jaxKerri Landress <kerrilandress > wrote: I have thought about an anyomonous way of telling him. I am sure he has it (and gave it to me) because of his past IV drug use. However, my job also puts me in an "at-risk" category, so my current husband is worried that he will claim I infected him and try to sue me. Though I believe this is not likely, I don't even think my ex has the money for an attorney or court costs, my current husband says "why even open pandora's box? He can go to the dr. if he starts getting sick... we don't need to be involved." As for my relationship with my ex... I don't trust him as far as I could throw him. He is a drug addict. But morally, and ethically, should I still tell him? Is there any obligation? I KNOW he has to be infected. <marvindamartian05 > wrote: I agree with Tim, plus it depends on what kind of relationship you have with your ex. A big consideration is: what purpose would it serve to tell him? And what harm could come from telling him?Does the benefit outweigh the potential damage?Your husband is trying to protect you from what could be a very stressful, and ultimately detrimental, situation. Assess the risks before taking action, and if you truly think that you will attain greater benefit by telling your ex than not, then go ahead.I told my ex, but he and I are the best of friends. We were married for 17 years, and he is negative.From a legal standpoint, your ex would 1) have to prove he was damaged, and 2) prove it was due to your negligence to even have a basis to bring an action to court, let along prevail. You could counter sue and claim HE infected YOU.From a pure "disclosure for safety's sake" point of view: if the ex IS infected, what are the chances of him inadvertently infecting others - such as children or other family members? You might feel like it weighs on your conscience to try and prevent the infection of others by your ex. Maybe you could "anonymously" disclose to him that he has possibly been exposed and should be tested.> I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new husband does > not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that I > could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical bills. > I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, > though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would > try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I > even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is > very paranoid about me saying anything, though.> > > > > > > Tim Parsons > > knoxville,tn 37931 > > 865-588-2465 x107 work> > > www.knoxville1.com> > > > ---------------------------------> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta. Jackie Access over 1 million songs - Music Unlimited. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 30, 2006 Report Share Posted November 30, 2006 Thanks. I'll take yours and my husband's advice. My ex will eventually find out about it... I don't need the added stress of dealing with him. We do have two kids together, but he doesn't see them because I have a court order against his visiting. He cannot lift the court order until he passes a drug test (which unfortuantly I don't think he ever will.) I've tried to help him for years... he's on his own about finding out he's infected.Jackie on <redjaxjm@...> wrote: well YOU MAY be right in that he gave it to you but he could only do that if you had blood to blood contact,, he maybe an IV drug user and still NOT have hcv! I was sure that my ex had it too,, and he did NOT.,,, If there is anyway he might hurt you, then I'd just leave it alone! If he goes to the doc when he doesnt feel well, they will find it at some point... you cannot put yourself at risk of harm just to make a point! There is no way you can do it anonymously because he will either think its some crackpot who has mistaken him for someone else,, or he will know its you later on when and if he finds out you have it,, and ppl DO talk,,, Trust your current hubby and just take care of YOU! Let him be responsible for himself,, you are not married to him any longer,, let it go hon,, for your own sake, let it go! jaxKerri Landress <kerrilandress > wrote: I have thought about an anyomonous way of telling him. I am sure he has it (and gave it to me) because of his past IV drug use. However, my job also puts me in an "at-risk" category, so my current husband is worried that he will claim I infected him and try to sue me. Though I believe this is not likely, I don't even think my ex has the money for an attorney or court costs, my current husband says "why even open pandora's box? He can go to the dr. if he starts getting sick... we don't need to be involved." As for my relationship with my ex... I don't trust him as far as I could throw him. He is a drug addict. But morally, and ethically, should I still tell him? Is there any obligation? I KNOW he has to be infected. <marvindamartian05 > wrote: I agree with Tim, plus it depends on what kind of relationship you have with your ex. A big consideration is: what purpose would it serve to tell him? And what harm could come from telling him?Does the benefit outweigh the potential damage?Your husband is trying to protect you from what could be a very stressful, and ultimately detrimental, situation. Assess the risks before taking action, and if you truly think that you will attain greater benefit by telling your ex than not, then go ahead.I told my ex, but he and I are the best of friends. We were married for 17 years, and he is negative.From a legal standpoint, your ex would 1) have to prove he was damaged, and 2) prove it was due to your negligence to even have a basis to bring an action to court, let along prevail. You could counter sue and claim HE infected YOU.From a pure "disclosure for safety's sake" point of view: if the ex IS infected, what are the chances of him inadvertently infecting others - such as children or other family members? You might feel like it weighs on your conscience to try and prevent the infection of others by your ex. Maybe you could "anonymously" disclose to him that he has possibly been exposed and should be tested.> I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new husband does > not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that I > could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical bills. > I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, > though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would > try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I > even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is > very paranoid about me saying anything, though.> > > > > > > Tim Parsons > > knoxville,tn 37931 > > 865-588-2465 x107 work> > > www.knoxville1.com> > > > ---------------------------------> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta. Jackie Access over 1 million songs - Music Unlimited. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 30, 2006 Report Share Posted November 30, 2006 Thanks for the info... I'll take your advice! Ex's SUCK! (especilly mine LOL)!!Jackie on <redjaxjm@...> wrote: I agree with ya Janet,, especially if there is ANY chance of retribution! One has to keep safe from ex's!Janet <doc_jade > wrote: Kerri I thought about telling my ex husband also. He was a surgical tech, and well heck he might need to be tested also. But you know something there was a reason I divorced him. I DIDN"T like him much. LOL And he has had lots of physicals between our divorce and now, I bet if he has Hepatitis C he wouldn't tell me. So I don't let it worry me. Have to agree with your current hubbie. Don't open up pandora's box. Love JanetKerri Landress <kerrilandress > wrote: I have thought about an anyomonous way of telling him. I am sure he has it (and gave it to me) because of his past IV drug use. However, my job also puts me in an "at-risk" category, so my current husband is worried that he will claim I infected him and try to sue me. Though I believe this is not likely, I don't even think my ex has the money for an attorney or court costs, my current husband says "why even open pandora's box? He can go to the dr. if he starts getting sick... we don't need to be involved." As for my relationship with my ex... I don't trust him as far as I could throw him. He is a drug addict. But morally, and ethically, should I still tell him? Is there any obligation? I KNOW he has to be infected. <marvindamartian05 > wrote: I agree with Tim, plus it depends on what kind of relationship you have with your ex. A big consideration is: what purpose would it serve to tell him? And what harm could come from telling him?Does the benefit outweigh the potential damage?Your husband is trying to protect you from what could be a very stressful, and ultimately detrimental, situation. Assess the risks before taking action, and if you truly think that you will attain greater benefit by telling your ex than not, then go ahead.I told my ex, but he and I are the best of friends. We were married for 17 years, and he is negative.From a legal standpoint, your ex would 1) have to prove he was damaged, and 2) prove it was due to your negligence to even have a basis to bring an action to court, let along prevail. You could counter sue and claim HE infected YOU.From a pure "disclosure for safety's sake" point of view: if the ex IS infected, what are the chances of him inadvertently infecting others - such as children or other family members? You might feel like it weighs on your conscience to try and prevent the infection of others by your ex. Maybe you could "anonymously" disclose to him that he has possibly been exposed and should be tested.> I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new husband does > not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that I > could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical bills. > I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, > though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would > try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I > even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is > very paranoid about me saying anything, though.> > > > > > > Tim Parsons > > knoxville,tn 37931 > > 865-588-2465 x107 work> > > www.knoxville1.com> > > > ---------------------------------> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta. Take the ordinary things of life, and make them your own. Do the impossible with a smile Jackie Want to start your own business? Learn how on Small Business. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 30, 2006 Report Share Posted November 30, 2006 Thanks for the info... I'll take your advice! Ex's SUCK! (especilly mine LOL)!!Jackie on <redjaxjm@...> wrote: I agree with ya Janet,, especially if there is ANY chance of retribution! One has to keep safe from ex's!Janet <doc_jade > wrote: Kerri I thought about telling my ex husband also. He was a surgical tech, and well heck he might need to be tested also. But you know something there was a reason I divorced him. I DIDN"T like him much. LOL And he has had lots of physicals between our divorce and now, I bet if he has Hepatitis C he wouldn't tell me. So I don't let it worry me. Have to agree with your current hubbie. Don't open up pandora's box. Love JanetKerri Landress <kerrilandress > wrote: I have thought about an anyomonous way of telling him. I am sure he has it (and gave it to me) because of his past IV drug use. However, my job also puts me in an "at-risk" category, so my current husband is worried that he will claim I infected him and try to sue me. Though I believe this is not likely, I don't even think my ex has the money for an attorney or court costs, my current husband says "why even open pandora's box? He can go to the dr. if he starts getting sick... we don't need to be involved." As for my relationship with my ex... I don't trust him as far as I could throw him. He is a drug addict. But morally, and ethically, should I still tell him? Is there any obligation? I KNOW he has to be infected. <marvindamartian05 > wrote: I agree with Tim, plus it depends on what kind of relationship you have with your ex. A big consideration is: what purpose would it serve to tell him? And what harm could come from telling him?Does the benefit outweigh the potential damage?Your husband is trying to protect you from what could be a very stressful, and ultimately detrimental, situation. Assess the risks before taking action, and if you truly think that you will attain greater benefit by telling your ex than not, then go ahead.I told my ex, but he and I are the best of friends. We were married for 17 years, and he is negative.From a legal standpoint, your ex would 1) have to prove he was damaged, and 2) prove it was due to your negligence to even have a basis to bring an action to court, let along prevail. You could counter sue and claim HE infected YOU.From a pure "disclosure for safety's sake" point of view: if the ex IS infected, what are the chances of him inadvertently infecting others - such as children or other family members? You might feel like it weighs on your conscience to try and prevent the infection of others by your ex. Maybe you could "anonymously" disclose to him that he has possibly been exposed and should be tested.> I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new husband does > not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that I > could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical bills. > I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, > though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would > try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I > even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is > very paranoid about me saying anything, though.> > > > > > > Tim Parsons > > knoxville,tn 37931 > > 865-588-2465 x107 work> > > www.knoxville1.com> > > > ---------------------------------> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta. Take the ordinary things of life, and make them your own. Do the impossible with a smile Jackie Want to start your own business? Learn how on Small Business. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 30, 2006 Report Share Posted November 30, 2006 lolJanet <doc_jade@...> wrote: Excellent answer!! Or as they say on Family Feud "Good Answer!!" I am a nerd, I know it. Hee Hee Love Janet <marvindamartian05 > wrote: As far as him being able to sue you for infecting him: in law there is a concept called the "doctrine of clean hands". Your ex has "dirty hands" because he could just have easily given you the hep as you could have given it to him. If he were to try and sue you, you can show that his hands are not clean, he has risk factors, etc. The chances of him prevailing are slim.Now as to ethics: if you tell the ex, is there a chance of him trying to hurt you, physically? If so, then you should keep your safety in mind above any perceived moral obligation.Also, consider this: if you tell him, will he change his behavior, or take steps to avoid infecting others? If not, what's the point?> > I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new > husband does > > not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that > I > > could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical > bills. > > I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, > > though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would > > try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I > > even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is > > very paranoid about me saying anything, though.> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Tim Parsons > > > > knoxville,tn 37931 > > > > 865-588-2465 x107 work> > > > > > www.knoxville1.com> > > > > > > > ---------------------------------> > Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.> >> > > > > > > ---------------------------------> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.>Take the ordinary things of life, and make them your own. Do the impossible with a smile Access over 1 million songs - Music Unlimited. Tim Parsons knoxville,tn 37931 865-588-2465 x107 work www.knoxville1.com Everyone is raving about the all-new beta. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 30, 2006 Report Share Posted November 30, 2006 Good girl,, your life WILL be easier this way! Trust your hubby hon,, and have everyone else tested,, even the kids,, just to be sure!Kerri Landress <kerrilandress@...> wrote: Thanks. I'll take yours and my husband's advice. My ex will eventually find out about it... I don't need the added stress of dealing with him. We do have two kids together, but he doesn't see them because I have a court order against his visiting. He cannot lift the court order until he passes a drug test (which unfortuantly I don't think he ever will.) I've tried to help him for years... he's on his own about finding out he's infected.Jackie on <redjaxjm > wrote: well YOU MAY be right in that he gave it to you but he could only do that if you had blood to blood contact,, he maybe an IV drug user and still NOT have hcv! I was sure that my ex had it too,, and he did NOT.,,, If there is anyway he might hurt you, then I'd just leave it alone! If he goes to the doc when he doesnt feel well, they will find it at some point... you cannot put yourself at risk of harm just to make a point! There is no way you can do it anonymously because he will either think its some crackpot who has mistaken him for someone else,, or he will know its you later on when and if he finds out you have it,, and ppl DO talk,,, Trust your current hubby and just take care of YOU! Let him be responsible for himself,, you are not married to him any longer,, let it go hon,, for your own sake, let it go! jaxKerri Landress <kerrilandress > wrote: I have thought about an anyomonous way of telling him. I am sure he has it (and gave it to me) because of his past IV drug use. However, my job also puts me in an "at-risk" category, so my current husband is worried that he will claim I infected him and try to sue me. Though I believe this is not likely, I don't even think my ex has the money for an attorney or court costs, my current husband says "why even open pandora's box? He can go to the dr. if he starts getting sick... we don't need to be involved." As for my relationship with my ex... I don't trust him as far as I could throw him. He is a drug addict. But morally, and ethically, should I still tell him? Is there any obligation? I KNOW he has to be infected. <marvindamartian05 > wrote: I agree with Tim, plus it depends on what kind of relationship you have with your ex. A big consideration is: what purpose would it serve to tell him? And what harm could come from telling him?Does the benefit outweigh the potential damage?Your husband is trying to protect you from what could be a very stressful, and ultimately detrimental, situation. Assess the risks before taking action, and if you truly think that you will attain greater benefit by telling your ex than not, then go ahead.I told my ex, but he and I are the best of friends. We were married for 17 years, and he is negative.From a legal standpoint, your ex would 1) have to prove he was damaged, and 2) prove it was due to your negligence to even have a basis to bring an action to court, let along prevail. You could counter sue and claim HE infected YOU.From a pure "disclosure for safety's sake" point of view: if the ex IS infected, what are the chances of him inadvertently infecting others - such as children or other family members? You might feel like it weighs on your conscience to try and prevent the infection of others by your ex. Maybe you could "anonymously" disclose to him that he has possibly been exposed and should be tested.> I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new husband does > not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that I > could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical bills. > I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, > though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would > try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I > even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is > very paranoid about me saying anything, though.> > > > > > > Tim Parsons > > knoxville,tn 37931 > > 865-588-2465 x107 work> > > www.knoxville1.com> > > > ---------------------------------> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta. Jackie Access over 1 million songs - Music Unlimited. Jackie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 30, 2006 Report Share Posted November 30, 2006 Good girl,, your life WILL be easier this way! Trust your hubby hon,, and have everyone else tested,, even the kids,, just to be sure!Kerri Landress <kerrilandress@...> wrote: Thanks. I'll take yours and my husband's advice. My ex will eventually find out about it... I don't need the added stress of dealing with him. We do have two kids together, but he doesn't see them because I have a court order against his visiting. He cannot lift the court order until he passes a drug test (which unfortuantly I don't think he ever will.) I've tried to help him for years... he's on his own about finding out he's infected.Jackie on <redjaxjm > wrote: well YOU MAY be right in that he gave it to you but he could only do that if you had blood to blood contact,, he maybe an IV drug user and still NOT have hcv! I was sure that my ex had it too,, and he did NOT.,,, If there is anyway he might hurt you, then I'd just leave it alone! If he goes to the doc when he doesnt feel well, they will find it at some point... you cannot put yourself at risk of harm just to make a point! There is no way you can do it anonymously because he will either think its some crackpot who has mistaken him for someone else,, or he will know its you later on when and if he finds out you have it,, and ppl DO talk,,, Trust your current hubby and just take care of YOU! Let him be responsible for himself,, you are not married to him any longer,, let it go hon,, for your own sake, let it go! jaxKerri Landress <kerrilandress > wrote: I have thought about an anyomonous way of telling him. I am sure he has it (and gave it to me) because of his past IV drug use. However, my job also puts me in an "at-risk" category, so my current husband is worried that he will claim I infected him and try to sue me. Though I believe this is not likely, I don't even think my ex has the money for an attorney or court costs, my current husband says "why even open pandora's box? He can go to the dr. if he starts getting sick... we don't need to be involved." As for my relationship with my ex... I don't trust him as far as I could throw him. He is a drug addict. But morally, and ethically, should I still tell him? Is there any obligation? I KNOW he has to be infected. <marvindamartian05 > wrote: I agree with Tim, plus it depends on what kind of relationship you have with your ex. A big consideration is: what purpose would it serve to tell him? And what harm could come from telling him?Does the benefit outweigh the potential damage?Your husband is trying to protect you from what could be a very stressful, and ultimately detrimental, situation. Assess the risks before taking action, and if you truly think that you will attain greater benefit by telling your ex than not, then go ahead.I told my ex, but he and I are the best of friends. We were married for 17 years, and he is negative.From a legal standpoint, your ex would 1) have to prove he was damaged, and 2) prove it was due to your negligence to even have a basis to bring an action to court, let along prevail. You could counter sue and claim HE infected YOU.From a pure "disclosure for safety's sake" point of view: if the ex IS infected, what are the chances of him inadvertently infecting others - such as children or other family members? You might feel like it weighs on your conscience to try and prevent the infection of others by your ex. Maybe you could "anonymously" disclose to him that he has possibly been exposed and should be tested.> I am quit certain I got HCV from my ex-husband. My new husband does > not want me to tell my ex about the HCV because he is worried that I > could be sued by him? That he could make me pay for his medical bills. > I have never heard of anything like this. My ex is a real jerk, > though, and if he could get any money from me, believe me he would > try. At the same time, I feel obligated to tell him... or should I > even care? I guess I would want to be told... My current husband is > very paranoid about me saying anything, though.> > > > > > > Tim Parsons > > knoxville,tn 37931 > > 865-588-2465 x107 work> > > www.knoxville1.com> > > > ---------------------------------> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.> Everyone is raving about the all-new beta. Jackie Access over 1 million songs - Music Unlimited. Jackie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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