Re: Help needed with 13 y/o with OCD

November 1, 2006

In a message dated 11/1/2006 10:48:30 A.M. Eastern Standard Time,

shaeckh@... writes:

Any suggestions I can give the school on strategies they can try to

keep him in class?

-

I'm sure you'll get some responses/suggestions on this, as we just had a big

go-around on this very subject on this board.

Is the school fully aware of your son's OCD? Do you have any considerations

in place for him to make it easier for him to cope? Are his counselor &

teachers educated about OCD?

My daughter has been on prozac since January & we've had EXCELLENT luck with

it. She also has the contamination fears (excessive hand washing & laundry,

long showers, etc). My daughter basically has no symptoms of OCD left at

all - thanks to the meds. We're slowly decreasing them now, in hopes that she

will have something to work with the therapist on so she can learn ERP, etc.

This is a skill she will need to know for the long-term.

anyway, I'm sure you'll be hearing from a lot of folks on this. Good luck.

LT

November 1, 2006

Thanks, LT.

I'm glad your daughter is doing well. We felt blessed that the

first medication we tried with him worked, but I guess it's

effectiveness has worn off.

He hates taking the medicine and eventually I had hoped to get him

off of it and give him ways to deal with his OCD that did not

include medication, but we have to take it a step at a time and if

the medicine gets him through the day, we go with it. But I

completely understand about the ERP and I'd like for him to get some

therapy as well.

The therapist he's seeing now is a social worker at a behavioral

institute in St. Louis. He really likes the guy, but I'm wondering

if I should get him in to see a psychiatrist instead. Anybody have

suggestions on that?

thanks,

Eckhoff

>

> In a message dated 11/1/2006 10:48:30 A.M. Eastern Standard Time,

> shaeckh@... writes:

>

> Any suggestions I can give the school on strategies they can try

to

> keep him in class?

>

> -

>

> I'm sure you'll get some responses/suggestions on this, as we just

had a big

> go-around on this very subject on this board.

>

> Is the school fully aware of your son's OCD? Do you have any

considerations

> in place for him to make it easier for him to cope? Are his

counselor &

> teachers educated about OCD?

>

> My daughter has been on prozac since January & we've had EXCELLENT

luck with

> it. She also has the contamination fears (excessive hand washing

& laundry,

> long showers, etc). My daughter basically has no symptoms of OCD

left at

> all - thanks to the meds. We're slowly decreasing them now, in

hopes that she

> will have something to work with the therapist on so she can

learn ERP, etc.

> This is a skill she will need to know for the long-term.

>

> anyway, I'm sure you'll be hearing from a lot of folks on this.

Good luck.

> LT

>

November 1, 2006

,

I know that for my 14 y/o with very severe ocd, the meds are

very important. We tried to add therapy in the past but he was so

sick that the therapist wasn't able to help. We are still working on

getting the med(s) that will help him get to the point of readiness

for therapy. He recently expressed an interest in " talking to

someone, " so we've set up an appointment with a new therapist who

supposedly has some ocd experience (I don't think the other one knew

much about ocd). Eventhough his meds aren't quite right yet, I'm

hoping she can at least give us some idea as to whether she thinks

she can help with the therapy.

So I guess I'm just trying to say that for us, meds are the

first line of treatment. Maybe your son needs an adjustment of the

med if it seemed to work at first? I think I would check into that.

Best of luck, Patty

> >

> > In a message dated 11/1/2006 10:48:30 A.M. Eastern Standard

Time,

> > shaeckh@ writes:

> >

> > Any suggestions I can give the school on strategies they can try

> to

> > keep him in class?

> >

> > -

> >

> > I'm sure you'll get some responses/suggestions on this, as we

just

> had a big

> > go-around on this very subject on this board.

> >

> > Is the school fully aware of your son's OCD? Do you have any

> considerations

> > in place for him to make it easier for him to cope? Are his

> counselor &

> > teachers educated about OCD?

> >

> > My daughter has been on prozac since January & we've had

EXCELLENT

> luck with

> > it. She also has the contamination fears (excessive hand

washing

> & laundry,

> > long showers, etc). My daughter basically has no symptoms of

OCD

> left at

> > all - thanks to the meds. We're slowly decreasing them now, in

> hopes that she

> > will have something to work with the therapist on so she can

> learn ERP, etc.

> > This is a skill she will need to know for the long-term.

> >

> > anyway, I'm sure you'll be hearing from a lot of folks on this.

> Good luck.

> > LT

> >

November 1, 2006

Hi, just a quick note - looking at info on Zoloft, he's on a low

dose. You might want to see about an increase. The OCD Foundation

site has the customary dosage range for kids at 50 to 150mg a day.

My son could do well at school at the beginning of the year but

seemed to start having OCD wax around Nov/Dec. I felt like maybe he

was just tired out by then or something after weeks of school. Now

he typically got excited around Christmas, which also increased his

OCD some, but the schoolwork issues seemed to slowly start becoming a

problem by this time too.

If your son is willing, maybe over the weekend or some evening he can

spend some time writing and NOT erasing or purposefully making

mistakes and trying to leave them, etc. Or is this just more

*school* related so it won't really count just writing on paper at

home? When teachers want something " neat " they sometimes don't

realize just what they are asking of some kids!

>

> Hey everyone!

>

> My son was diagnosed 3 years ago, takes 25mg of Zoloft and has done

> rather well since his diagnosis. Didn't really hear any OCD

thoughts

November 2, 2006

Hi ,

Is your son seeing a psychiatrist now for the medication? 25mg of

Zoloft is a low dose for OCD and he may need to slowly increase.

It's best to see a psychiatrist who is farmiliar with OCD to handle

the medication side of it. Then you need a therapist (usually a

psychologist) who works with OCD, specifically using CBT and ERP, to

teach your son the skills to deal w/ the OCD. It can be difficult to

find a therapist, because many are not really farmiliar w/OCD even if

they say they are.

I know what your saying about your husband. Mine can be very

difficult when my son has OCD flare ups. He doesn't usually handle

it very well and seems to forget that our son doesn't want to be this

way.

We have been through some really tense times in our home too. I know

that this will sometimes contribute to the OCD issues, but it's

important to remember that this does not cause OCD. My son was

seeing a therapist once who wanted to blame my hubby and me

(especially hubby) for the OCD. The therapist didn't address the

OCD and we wasted time going to him and I think it actually made it

worse for my son.

November 2, 2006

I have to jump in and second what said. The first pdoc we went to

when my DD's OCD came out of the blue did a lot of talk therapy and play

therapy and talking about her anger and feelings, and blamed us, etc.

etc. We had just had newborn twins the same month she fell apart and

they were in the NICU and she was suddenly not eating, totally anxious,

etc. Well, for 2 months we went to appts. where we got advice to leave

the babies in other people's care (hard when you're breastfeeding 2

brand new infants!) and take her out, pay more attention to her (she had

lots!), take her bowling, go to the movies, blah blah blah. She also

said that she should be able to say that she hated the babies if she

wanted, and have tantrums and yell to get out all her anger. What? She

turned into this OCD, anxious, AND obnoxious kid that we were all trying

to appease. Meanwhile, her OCD got worse and she ate even less and lost

more weight....

We switched pdocs, they put her on Prozac and VOILA! She stopped having

constant vomit thoughts, stopped counting stairs in case she would

vomit, quit picking out the opposite clothes in the morning from what

she really wanted to wear because of course she would vomit if she wore

the clothes she really liked......all sound familiar? :-) She didn't

hate her brothers, she wasn't starving for attention. She had an onset

of OCD because of a GOOD stressful event for our family and it just

occurred at the same time. The diagnosis and the right medication made

all the difference. I shudder to think about if we were still going to

that first pdoc!

Dina

November 2, 2006

shannon - forgive me if i'm writing twice - I'm losing my mind -

anyway - your son sounds just like my dd 7 y.o. - handwashing the main

thing and recently writing /erasing issues ,some sensory etc- now the

past few days all seems well - we set a 30 second rule with the

washing and school has really been trying with her so far - writing is

basically gone - they're letting me write for her or she can circle

things,computer etc - I get annoyed that she has to do any - but I

guess they're trying to keep her doing some stuff so she can work

towards handling it again - the therapist says if she shows she knows

it who cares how -thank God she's bright - as we've mentiond here

before most of these OCD kids have been blessed with that- hope this

helps a bit

eileen

Quoting Eckhoff <shaeckh@...>:

> Hey everyone!

>

> My son was diagnosed 3 years ago, takes 25mg of Zoloft and has done

> rather well since his diagnosis. Didn't really hear any OCD thoughts

> over the summer at all, but since school has started, OCD is up to

> it's old tricks again.

>

> He just called me crying from school, husband is picking him up

> because he can't deal. He's missed more school than I'd like him to

> and I finally called today to talk to the counselor. She was

> sympathetic but doesn't really know what I want her to do.

>

> His main fear is germs, he's a handwasher but more recently, he's been

> dealing with writing letters correctly. He's spending a lot of time

> erasing, etc - and alot of time worrrying about it.

>

> I'm going to call the doc now to see if I can do something about

> changing his medicine, I guess. I dont' know what to do. I'm about

> at my limit. My husband's being a complete jackass. He's better with

> the OCD now, but he's still not completely on board and we have an

> older daughter that we are arguing about, so our home is not a happy

> place right now.

>

> Any suggestions I can give the school on strategies they can try to

> keep him in class?

>

> Thanks for your help,

> in Missouri

>

November 2, 2006

oh! also 5 minute breaks after each assignment is done - walks,

breathing, now visualization (thanks Sharon) - incentives yet she says

they freaked her out more because she wnats them but sometimes can't

do things???

good luck

eileen

Quoting Eckhoff <shaeckh@...>:

> Hey everyone!

>

> My son was diagnosed 3 years ago, takes 25mg of Zoloft and has done

> rather well since his diagnosis. Didn't really hear any OCD thoughts

> over the summer at all, but since school has started, OCD is up to

> it's old tricks again.

>

> He just called me crying from school, husband is picking him up

> because he can't deal. He's missed more school than I'd like him to

> and I finally called today to talk to the counselor. She was

> sympathetic but doesn't really know what I want her to do.

>

> His main fear is germs, he's a handwasher but more recently, he's been

> dealing with writing letters correctly. He's spending a lot of time

> erasing, etc - and alot of time worrrying about it.

>

> I'm going to call the doc now to see if I can do something about

> changing his medicine, I guess. I dont' know what to do. I'm about

> at my limit. My husband's being a complete jackass. He's better with

> the OCD now, but he's still not completely on board and we have an

> older daughter that we are arguing about, so our home is not a happy

> place right now.

>

> Any suggestions I can give the school on strategies they can try to

> keep him in class?

>

> Thanks for your help,

> in Missouri

>

November 2, 2006

:0) You are welcome. Glad it helps! It has really worked well with Abby. We

just find situations that are very relaxing to her and have her close her eyes

and talk about them. She was having a HARD morning today (got up way to early,

and is actually napping this afternoon!!). She was crying about not being able

to tie and was hysterical. It was snowing this morning, so she was visualizing

laying outside in the snow, feeling the flakes land on her face, making snow

angels, etc. It worked really well.

The one that works best for bed time is visualizing floating in warm water in

the bath tub. Always relaxes her and puts her to sleep!

She had another OCD related dream again last night - I think that is what woke

her up so early. <sigh> But, I keep telling myself, her therapist said dreams

are a safe way to deal with her OCD issues.

Sharon

Re: Help needed with 13 y/o with OCD

oh! also 5 minute breaks after each assignment is done - walks,

breathing, now visualization (thanks Sharon) - incentives yet she says

they freaked her out more because she wnats them but sometimes can't

do things???

good luck

eileen

Quoting Eckhoff <shaeckh@...>:

> Hey everyone!

>

> My son was diagnosed 3 years ago, takes 25mg of Zoloft and has done

> rather well since his diagnosis. Didn't really hear any OCD thoughts

> over the summer at all, but since school has started, OCD is up to

> it's old tricks again.

>

> He just called me crying from school, husband is picking him up

> because he can't deal. He's missed more school than I'd like him to

> and I finally called today to talk to the counselor. She was

> sympathetic but doesn't really know what I want her to do.

>

> His main fear is germs, he's a handwasher but more recently, he's been

> dealing with writing letters correctly. He's spending a lot of time

> erasing, etc - and alot of time worrrying about it.

>

> I'm going to call the doc now to see if I can do something about

> changing his medicine, I guess. I dont' know what to do. I'm about

> at my limit. My husband's being a complete jackass. He's better with

> the OCD now, but he's still not completely on board and we have an

> older daughter that we are arguing about, so our home is not a happy

> place right now.

>

> Any suggestions I can give the school on strategies they can try to

> keep him in class?

>

> Thanks for your help,

> in Missouri

>

November 2, 2006

thanks for the help.

I'm so sorry

>

> shannon - forgive me if i'm writing twice - I'm losing my mind -

> anyway - your son sounds just like my dd 7 y.o. - handwashing the

main

> thing and recently writing /erasing issues ,some sensory etc- now

the

> past few days all seems well - we set a 30 second rule with the

> washing and school has really been trying with her so far -

writing is

> basically gone - they're letting me write for her or she can

circle

> things,computer etc - I get annoyed that she has to do any - but

I

> guess they're trying to keep her doing some stuff so she can work

> towards handling it again - the therapist says if she shows she

knows

> it who cares how -thank God she's bright - as we've mentiond here

> before most of these OCD kids have been blessed with that- hope

this

> helps a bit

> eileen

>

> Quoting Eckhoff <shaeckh@...>:

>

> > Hey everyone!

> >

> > My son was diagnosed 3 years ago, takes 25mg of Zoloft and has

done

> > rather well since his diagnosis. Didn't really hear any OCD

thoughts

> > over the summer at all, but since school has started, OCD is up

to

> > it's old tricks again.

> >

> > He just called me crying from school, husband is picking him up

> > because he can't deal. He's missed more school than I'd like

him to

> > and I finally called today to talk to the counselor. She was

> > sympathetic but doesn't really know what I want her to do.

> >

> > His main fear is germs, he's a handwasher but more recently,

he's been

> > dealing with writing letters correctly. He's spending a lot of

time

> > erasing, etc - and alot of time worrrying about it.

> >

> > I'm going to call the doc now to see if I can do something about

> > changing his medicine, I guess. I dont' know what to do. I'm

about

> > at my limit. My husband's being a complete jackass. He's

better with

> > the OCD now, but he's still not completely on board and we have

an

> > older daughter that we are arguing about, so our home is not a

happy

> > place right now.

> >

> > Any suggestions I can give the school on strategies they can try

to

> > keep him in class?

> >

> > Thanks for your help,

> > in Missouri

> >

>

November 2, 2006

thanks so much for all your suggestions. I looked at the bottle and

he's taking 50 mg not 25. I talked to the therapist yesterday and

he said he thinks a medicine change is in order, possibly because

he's starting to go through puberty and maybe that's got his

hormones in an uproar, but he can't prescribe - has to be pysch doc

or regular doc. Regular doc is a little funny about medicine, so

I'm not sure he'll do it and psych doc can't get us in until January.

He cried this morning and didn't want to go to school. I asked him

if he thought he could make it half day & he said he'd try. I told

him if not Dad would pick him up at 1pm. He reluctantly went and

then we didn't hear anything from him, so he was able to make it

through the entire day! I was so glad. he said the first couple of

hours were the hardest - maybe he's too tired in the morning? I'll

try to get him to go to bed earlier. Isn't it hard to wonder what

you can change to keep this disease from getting to our children?

It really sucks!!!!!

We don't have a formal IEP yet, but are trying to come up with

strategies to put one in place if necessary. He says he has lots of

homework tonight, so we'll see how that goes. Generally, he doesn't

really have any of the fears when he's with me or dad - just at

school. I think that's why it's hard for hubby to get. He

sometimes thinks he's just faking. I don't think a 13 y/o boy - who

prides himself on being tough - would fake crying like a baby at

school, in front of his friends if he could help it. Dad tries to

understand - but I have to kick his butt into gear now and then to

get him to realize that DJ can't help it. I think that's one of the

hardest things - not placing blame on anybody, don't you.

so glad I've got you all - you're lifesavers.

Thanks,

in Missouri

November 2, 2006

Hi, My kids sound just like yours...12 yrs dd and 9 yr ds, both

have issues at school, when they are home they are ok. School seems

to bring out the OCD and intrusive thoughts. It is very frustrating

because you cannot be there to help them and explain to the teachers

how it is OCD not a behavior. It is always a battle in the a.m.

getting them to go to school!

in MA

>

> thanks so much for all your suggestions. I looked at the bottle

and

> he's taking 50 mg not 25. I talked to the therapist yesterday and

> he said he thinks a medicine change is in order, possibly because

> he's starting to go through puberty and maybe that's got his

> hormones in an uproar, but he can't prescribe - has to be pysch

doc

> or regular doc. Regular doc is a little funny about medicine, so

> I'm not sure he'll do it and psych doc can't get us in until

January.

>

> He cried this morning and didn't want to go to school. I asked

him

> if he thought he could make it half day & he said he'd try. I

told

> him if not Dad would pick him up at 1pm. He reluctantly went and

> then we didn't hear anything from him, so he was able to make it

> through the entire day! I was so glad. he said the first couple

of

> hours were the hardest - maybe he's too tired in the morning?

I'll

> try to get him to go to bed earlier. Isn't it hard to wonder what

> you can change to keep this disease from getting to our children?

> It really sucks!!!!!

>

> We don't have a formal IEP yet, but are trying to come up with

> strategies to put one in place if necessary. He says he has lots

of

> homework tonight, so we'll see how that goes. Generally, he

doesn't

> really have any of the fears when he's with me or dad - just at

> school. I think that's why it's hard for hubby to get. He

> sometimes thinks he's just faking. I don't think a 13 y/o boy -

who

> prides himself on being tough - would fake crying like a baby at

> school, in front of his friends if he could help it. Dad tries to

> understand - but I have to kick his butt into gear now and then to

> get him to realize that DJ can't help it. I think that's one of

the

> hardest things - not placing blame on anybody, don't you.

>

> so glad I've got you all - you're lifesavers.

>

> Thanks,

> in Missouri

>

November 2, 2006

,

When my now 14 y/o son first started avoiding situations, school, etc.

I thought at times he was manipulating me. It took his really getting

sick for me to see how truly tormented he is. So I think if your

husband doesn't really see how much your son is struggling with the ocd

he may not understand. Believe me, I know no child wants to have ocd

and all the awful things that go with it. One of the books I read on

ocd said of certain behaviors " if you think it's ocd, it probably is. "

Hang in there, Patty

November 2, 2006

This is soooooo tough for me, too - my husband seems to be in denial, as well.

As if our daughter, who's been obviously afflicted with this since BIRTH, is

somehow just going to suddenly snap out of it. It's tragic but reassuring to

know that there are other parents who have to deal with what is often one-sided

parenting with OCD. I understand what you're going through - you know your son

well enough to know that he's not faking, and that there's a real problem. By

the way, our daughter is on 250 mg daily of Zoloft - quite a bit more than many

dosages I've seen. It was working for several months but may have " expired "

somehow. Best of luck with the med change - it could make all of the

difference.

Eckhoff <shaeckh@...> wrote: I

think that's why it's hard for hubby to get. He

sometimes thinks he's just faking. I don't think a 13 y/o boy - who

prides himself on being tough - would fake crying like a baby at

school, in front of his friends if he could help it. Dad tries to

understand - but I have to kick his butt into gear now and then to

get him to realize that DJ can't help it. I think that's one of the

hardest things - not placing blame on anybody, don't you.

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November 2, 2006