Guest guest Posted September 6, 2006 Report Share Posted September 6, 2006 Well I just posted earlier about how great my son did meeting with his teacher yesterday after not going to school last week. I said you never know when the bomb would hit, didn't think it would be this fast. Tonight he had a major rage again, been 4 days without meds so I can't blame it on that. Threw things on the floor, screamed, etc. Who is this child, not mine 5 months ago? Anyway, later it came out he can't stand school, he can't write and that is all they do. Cant do division even though last year he knew his math facts better than anyone. Begged me to homeschool which I would be terrible at. Total melt down again. I have no idea if I will get this child back in school tomorrow. Then tonight they had the parent open house, the teacher talked about the writing prompts, all very emotional, your happiest time, your most embarrassing, saddest, funnest. My son struggled last night filling out this sheet to answer those questions and to be honest I couldn't think of some either. Tonight at the open house I just about lost it thinking his most embarrassing time is every day and of course he doesn't want to talk about that, its too weird, real and fresh, his funnest time, well its been a long time since he has had one of those, he doesn't like to do anything with his fears, what makes him laugh, he says nothing only he makes others laugh (he is the class clown). Then the teacher used examples like child getting a soccer goal, my son won't play sports or had any great accomplishment this last 6 months. Ugg!! So now I know why writing might be hard not to add just the penmanship part is hard for him. Sorry to vent on your guys, but this is so depressing and such a incredible roller coaster ride. I don't meet with his doctor until next week about starting new meds. I feel like I am constantly on hold for the next bomb and then when it hits it takes a couple of days to get back on my feet. Then to top it off, I haven't been able to do my work because of all this and my husband is holding back money which I need for therapy, ugg! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 6, 2006 Report Share Posted September 6, 2006 Adele~ I'm so sorry. I really feel for you because this all sounds very familiar to me. My son won't go to school and would be horrified if he was asked to write about those topics. My son is also the class clown. My son thinks he's weird because all guys his age have trophies in their rooms of sports they've participated in----but not him. He attempted sports at a young age but his anxiety always held him back and therefore he quit trying and we quit pushing it. He loves art and music and just hasn't ever met another guy friend who likes those same things. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you, and if he doesn't want to go to school---don't stress about it yet. My son has missed 15 days so far this year. YIKES! Glenda adelem1232000 <adelem@...> wrote: Well I just posted earlier about how great my son did meeting with his teacher yesterday after not going to school last week. I said you never know when the bomb would hit, didn't think it would be this fast. Tonight he had a major rage again, been 4 days without meds so I can't blame it on that. Threw things on the floor, screamed, etc. Who is this child, not mine 5 months ago? Anyway, later it came out he can't stand school, he can't write and that is all they do. Cant do division even though last year he knew his math facts better than anyone. Begged me to homeschool which I would be terrible at. Total melt down again. I have no idea if I will get this child back in school tomorrow. Then tonight they had the parent open house, the teacher talked about the writing prompts, all very emotional, your happiest time, your most embarrassing, saddest, funnest. My son struggled last night filling out this sheet to answer those questions and to be honest I couldn't think of some either. Tonight at the open house I just about lost it thinking his most embarrassing time is every day and of course he doesn't want to talk about that, its too weird, real and fresh, his funnest time, well its been a long time since he has had one of those, he doesn't like to do anything with his fears, what makes him laugh, he says nothing only he makes others laugh (he is the class clown). Then the teacher used examples like child getting a soccer goal, my son won't play sports or had any great accomplishment this last 6 months. Ugg!! So now I know why writing might be hard not to add just the penmanship part is hard for him. Sorry to vent on your guys, but this is so depressing and such a incredible roller coaster ride. I don't meet with his doctor until next week about starting new meds. I feel like I am constantly on hold for the next bomb and then when it hits it takes a couple of days to get back on my feet. Then to top it off, I haven't been able to do my work because of all this and my husband is holding back money which I need for therapy, ugg! --------------------------------- Messenger with Voice. Make PC-to-Phone Calls to the US (and 30+ countries) for 2¢/min or less. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 7, 2006 Report Share Posted September 7, 2006 In a message dated 9/6/2006 11:37:13 P.M. Eastern Standard Time, g_mart1971@... writes: Tonight at the open house I just about lost it thinking his most embarrassing time is every day and of course he doesn't want to talk about that, its too weird, real and fresh, Adel On the plus side, you know the teacher is understanding & will work with you (after your meeting went so well with her & your son), she may not be realizing that this is a problem for your son. Say something to her about it. Use it as an example of the type of thing you need to have her make exceptions on for him. Maybe your son could use his 'creative writing' skills and make something up for these stories. Or ask if he could pick different subjects. You could also have a heart-to-heart with your son & tell him that you want to be sure he understands that everything can be worked with - instead of letting himself get so upset & not say anything to you, to *please* give you a chance to help him work things out..... chances are there's always a way to work things out so they're ok for him. Sometimes kids get so upset over things like this at school because they feel " this is it... what the teacher says... I have no choice " and they panic. Remind him that, while his teacher is understanding & wants to work with them so he's comfortable at school - she may *not* be aware of every little thing that's going to be a road block for him -- so he needs to be the one to come home & talk to you about it so it can be addressed. LT Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 7, 2006 Report Share Posted September 7, 2006 Thanks Glenda, Yes your son sounds exactly like mine. Too bad we don’t live near each other so they could hang out together. Thanks for the encouragement. I am waking up feeling a little better, I get so tired of being up and positive and then down and depressed. Hang in there yourself! Adele _____ From: [mailto: ] On Behalf Of Glenda ez Sent: Wednesday, September 06, 2006 11:31 PM Subject: Re: writing problems Adele~ I'm so sorry. I really feel for you because this all sounds very familiar to me. My son won't go to school and would be horrified if he was asked to write about those topics. My son is also the class clown. My son thinks he's weird because all guys his age have trophies in their rooms of sports they've participated in----but not him. He attempted sports at a young age but his anxiety always held him back and therefore he quit trying and we quit pushing it. He loves art and music and just hasn't ever met another guy friend who likes those same things. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you, and if he doesn't want to go to school---don't stress about it yet. My son has missed 15 days so far this year. YIKES! Glenda adelem1232000 <adelemcarolina (DOT) <mailto:adelem%40carolina.rr.com> rr.com> wrote: Well I just posted earlier about how great my son did meeting with his teacher yesterday after not going to school last week. I said you never know when the bomb would hit, didn't think it would be this fast. Tonight he had a major rage again, been 4 days without meds so I can't blame it on that. Threw things on the floor, screamed, etc. Who is this child, not mine 5 months ago? Anyway, later it came out he can't stand school, he can't write and that is all they do. Cant do division even though last year he knew his math facts better than anyone. Begged me to homeschool which I would be terrible at. Total melt down again. I have no idea if I will get this child back in school tomorrow. Then tonight they had the parent open house, the teacher talked about the writing prompts, all very emotional, your happiest time, your most embarrassing, saddest, funnest. My son struggled last night filling out this sheet to answer those questions and to be honest I couldn't think of some either. Tonight at the open house I just about lost it thinking his most embarrassing time is every day and of course he doesn't want to talk about that, its too weird, real and fresh, his funnest time, well its been a long time since he has had one of those, he doesn't like to do anything with his fears, what makes him laugh, he says nothing only he makes others laugh (he is the class clown). Then the teacher used examples like child getting a soccer goal, my son won't play sports or had any great accomplishment this last 6 months. Ugg!! So now I know why writing might be hard not to add just the penmanship part is hard for him. Sorry to vent on your guys, but this is so depressing and such a incredible roller coaster ride. I don't meet with his doctor until next week about starting new meds. I feel like I am constantly on hold for the next bomb and then when it hits it takes a couple of days to get back on my feet. Then to top it off, I haven't been able to do my work because of all this and my husband is holding back money which I need for therapy, ugg! --------------------------------- Messenger with Voice. Make PC-to-Phone Calls to the US (and 30+ countries) for 2¢/min or less. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 7, 2006 Report Share Posted September 7, 2006 Thanks, I did email the teacher this morning and she did tell us at Open House that they could write on any subject, which I did tell me son. I do understand the power of communication with the teacher and school. Your right he gets so worked up that he doesn't see a way out. I got so upset last night that he could see it, he then changed his tone and agreed to go to school. Woke up in a pretty good mood and made it to school. Whew!! Every day out that door is huge! We have a appointment with his therapist and look forward to talking with him about that. Thanks for your help Adele _____ From: [mailto: ] On Behalf Of jtlt@... Sent: Thursday, September 07, 2006 6:46 AM Cc: adelem@... Subject: Re: writing problems In a message dated 9/6/2006 11:37:13 P.M. Eastern Standard Time, g_mart1971 (DOT) <mailto:g_mart1971%40> com writes: Tonight at the open house I just about lost it thinking his most embarrassing time is every day and of course he doesn't want to talk about that, its too weird, real and fresh, Adel On the plus side, you know the teacher is understanding & will work with you (after your meeting went so well with her & your son), she may not be realizing that this is a problem for your son. Say something to her about it. Use it as an example of the type of thing you need to have her make exceptions on for him. Maybe your son could use his 'creative writing' skills and make something up for these stories. Or ask if he could pick different subjects. You could also have a heart-to-heart with your son & tell him that you want to be sure he understands that everything can be worked with - instead of letting himself get so upset & not say anything to you, to *please* give you a chance to help him work things out..... chances are there's always a way to work things out so they're ok for him. Sometimes kids get so upset over things like this at school because they feel " this is it... what the teacher says... I have no choice " and they panic. Remind him that, while his teacher is understanding & wants to work with them so he's comfortable at school - she may *not* be aware of every little thing that's going to be a road block for him -- so he needs to be the one to come home & talk to you about it so it can be addressed. LT Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 7, 2006 Report Share Posted September 7, 2006 Hi Adele, I'm glad things seem a bit better today! Reminded me of when my oldest son (21) was in elementary school. They had to write a paper about the beach, like a trip they had taken. Well, he'd never been to a beach, we couldn't/can't afford it. So he was upset, I felt bad, but since he basically knew what was *at* the beach, he could come up with something. (since then, he's been lots of times with other families and we made it twice when the twins were young). Other things like that have popped up over the years between my 3 sons & schoolwork, but we managed somehow. I can't recall the topic now but had a similar problem (my OCD son) and he will not lie so coming up with something wasn't working for him; and I don't recall now what he ended up writing/doing. Glad he made it to school and was feeling better about today! > > Thanks, > > I did email the teacher this morning and she did tell us at Open House that > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 7, 2006 Report Share Posted September 7, 2006 Hi Adele, I can relate to what you're going through. I haven't followed e-mails for a while, so other than your recent post, I don't know your son's circumstances. My son started 5th grade last Wednesday. Today he went back for the first time since the 1st day. He's seeing the p-doc tomorrow b/c one or more of his meds (risperdal, lamictal, ativan) has caused a " cognitive dulling " effect that makes it extremely difficult for him to read and almost impossible for him to do math problems. Math was always his strongest subject. When he tried to focus long enough to answer homework questions RE his favorite activities, foods, subjects, etc., he spelled even simple words incorrectly, he reversed letters, used no capitals or punctuation, etc. Could your son's difficulties be caused by a medication? Overwhelming OCD thoughts can also use up all one's mental energy so there's no room left for reflection. I was able to get to go to school today since I spoke to his teacher and guidance counselor yesterday. Until his meds are stable and he's able to think clearly, they are going to refrain from asking him any questions (except in the unlikely event that he raises his hand.) He's also going to participate in a small group of kids who receive Title 1 extra help with math. If this doesn't help, I will have a tutor help him until he's able to catch up. I'm not aware of extra help being available without an IEP for writing. Rather than home schooling, maybe your son could have a 504 plan that accomodates his current writing difficulties. If things get really bad for my son and he becomes completely unable to go to school for a long period, I'm prepared to fight for the school to provide a tutor to come to the house to help him in all subjects. Although the school will probably not willing do this, I'm under the impression that they have a legal obligation. Good luck. Tamara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 7, 2006 Report Share Posted September 7, 2006 Thanks Tamara, I am so sorry your son was having problems going to school also. That is awesome that he went today, way to go!! My son has actually been off medications for 4 days now and in some ways doing better except for a incident yesterday. We just met with his therapist today and he suggested seeing if he can do a lot of his writing by typing. For him so much of it is the physical part of it. He started taking meds last year for ADD and it helped tremendously but now he isn't taking the Adderal because of the OCD. That is hard place to be for all if your child misses a lot of school. Your kind of caught without a plan. Hopefully you are on the first step to going back all year. My son went to school today also and I think had a good day, yeh!! I am just going to cross my fingers and see what happens. I hate how with this you constantly get caught off guard and never when the bad will hit. Thanks for the suggestions and good luck tomorrow!! Adele _____ From: [mailto: ] On Behalf Of cleopatra_lily Sent: Thursday, September 07, 2006 12:32 PM Subject: Re: writing problems Hi Adele, I can relate to what you're going through. I haven't followed e-mails for a while, so other than your recent post, I don't know your son's circumstances. My son started 5th grade last Wednesday. Today he went back for the first time since the 1st day. He's seeing the p-doc tomorrow b/c one or more of his meds (risperdal, lamictal, ativan) has caused a " cognitive dulling " effect that makes it extremely difficult for him to read and almost impossible for him to do math problems. Math was always his strongest subject. When he tried to focus long enough to answer homework questions RE his favorite activities, foods, subjects, etc., he spelled even simple words incorrectly, he reversed letters, used no capitals or punctuation, etc. Could your son's difficulties be caused by a medication? Overwhelming OCD thoughts can also use up all one's mental energy so there's no room left for reflection. I was able to get to go to school today since I spoke to his teacher and guidance counselor yesterday. Until his meds are stable and he's able to think clearly, they are going to refrain from asking him any questions (except in the unlikely event that he raises his hand.) He's also going to participate in a small group of kids who receive Title 1 extra help with math. If this doesn't help, I will have a tutor help him until he's able to catch up. I'm not aware of extra help being available without an IEP for writing. Rather than home schooling, maybe your son could have a 504 plan that accomodates his current writing difficulties. If things get really bad for my son and he becomes completely unable to go to school for a long period, I'm prepared to fight for the school to provide a tutor to come to the house to help him in all subjects. Although the school will probably not willing do this, I'm under the impression that they have a legal obligation. Good luck. Tamara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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