Child refusing therapy

[Guest guest]

I have some good news to share tonight. Last week my son was

refusing to go to therapy. His father who is also OCD was refusing

to go also. It has been very depressing to try and fight this battle

alone when neither were willing to get help for themselves. My

therapist started teaching me how not to cater to them or rescue

them since they won't help themselves. We both took all pressure off

of them to go to therapy, I continued to go alone without them. I

decided to talk to my son and explain that if he can't go then I

can't help him when he gets scared of a storm, etc. He said he could

control it by himself and that he didn't need me or the therapist. A

few days went by and actually my son did control his fear of storms

pretty well until the last day it was beginning to storm, our dog

was starving and I needed to go to the store to buy food, my son

paniced that I couldn't go and leave him with his brother. He got

desperate enough to promise to go to therapy if I would stay home.

Deal! Then everytime my husband would try to talk to me about the

kids, I would just respond, " Your in control, you don't need

therapy " So today, my son went with me, I had him wait in the

waiting room so I could talk a few minutes with the Dr. alone. Five

minutes later the door knocked and it was my husband (wow, I had

never said a word to him, it was a total suprise) we started talking

and then a few minutes later my son knocked on the door. It was so

great to see them both there without me trying to force the issue.

Then my son started behaving poorly because that is what he does

when he is nervous. The therapist was all over it, showing us how to

discipline, etc. Then my husband made some mistakes with my son and

the therapist was able to correct and show him the right way. Really

exciting to see the whole family come together that way. The Dr.

instructed my husband to spend more time with my son, instructed us

both to continue with our life and do not stop due to my sons fears

anymore. He really took a very tough approach that many would

probably think was cruel but it seemed to work. My sons dose of

Zoloft is up to 100mg. and I am hoping we are on the uphill stretch.

I am learning through the therapist and my pediatrician that

discipline is crucial in all this. Learning how not to fix this

problem for them or protect them from it. My pediatrician said that

you use the discipline to teach them how to handle it.

Anyway, sorry to ramble but very exciting break through after weeks

of alot of dissapointments.

DP

[Guest guest]

THAT IS AWESOME!!! so glad you're moving forward!!

Eileen

Quoting adelem1232000 <adelem@...>:

> I have some good news to share tonight. Last week my son was

> refusing to go to therapy. His father who is also OCD was refusing

> to go also. It has been very depressing to try and fight this battle

> alone when neither were willing to get help for themselves. My

> therapist started teaching me how not to cater to them or rescue

> them since they won't help themselves. We both took all pressure off

> of them to go to therapy, I continued to go alone without them. I

> decided to talk to my son and explain that if he can't go then I

> can't help him when he gets scared of a storm, etc. He said he could

> control it by himself and that he didn't need me or the therapist. A

> few days went by and actually my son did control his fear of storms

> pretty well until the last day it was beginning to storm, our dog

> was starving and I needed to go to the store to buy food, my son

> paniced that I couldn't go and leave him with his brother. He got

> desperate enough to promise to go to therapy if I would stay home.

> Deal! Then everytime my husband would try to talk to me about the

> kids, I would just respond, " Your in control, you don't need

> therapy " So today, my son went with me, I had him wait in the

> waiting room so I could talk a few minutes with the Dr. alone. Five

> minutes later the door knocked and it was my husband (wow, I had

> never said a word to him, it was a total suprise) we started talking

> and then a few minutes later my son knocked on the door. It was so

> great to see them both there without me trying to force the issue.

> Then my son started behaving poorly because that is what he does

> when he is nervous. The therapist was all over it, showing us how to

> discipline, etc. Then my husband made some mistakes with my son and

> the therapist was able to correct and show him the right way. Really

> exciting to see the whole family come together that way. The Dr.

> instructed my husband to spend more time with my son, instructed us

> both to continue with our life and do not stop due to my sons fears

> anymore. He really took a very tough approach that many would

> probably think was cruel but it seemed to work. My sons dose of

> Zoloft is up to 100mg. and I am hoping we are on the uphill stretch.

>

> I am learning through the therapist and my pediatrician that

> discipline is crucial in all this. Learning how not to fix this

> problem for them or protect them from it. My pediatrician said that

> you use the discipline to teach them how to handle it.

>

> Anyway, sorry to ramble but very exciting break through after weeks

> of alot of dissapointments.

> DP

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