New Member Introduction

[Guest guest]

I have been avidly ready all of the posts but wanted to post and

introduce mysellf to all of you.

My name is Judith (my nickname is ladybug). I am a 51 year old single

mom with a son () who is 22 years old. I am retired on disabilty

(retired at age 43 in 1998) after working as a civilian for the Navy

for almost 25 years. I was a secretary for a group of 25 engineers

and technicians when I retired. It has always been just and

myself (his father has never been involved in 's life - his

father's choice - and he doesn't now what he is missing).

Anyway............. was diagnosed in 1990 (age 4-1/2) as having

severe ADHD. He was enrolled in special ed pre-school. He was tried

in regualr kindergarten the following year but after 6 days was pulled

out (a mutual decision between the school and myself). The next year

he attended morning kindergarten and afternoon special ed pre-school.

This worked very well for him. SO they thought he would do ok in

regular first grade. Well, they were wrong. The school psychologist

had to physically remove him from the classroom because he was having

a major meltdown in the classroom. Later that month (September) he

was hospitalizaed at Children's Hospital in Seattle for a total of 68

days. After that hospitalization, he was set up in a self contained

classroom. Believe it or not, he completed both FIRST and SECOND

grades during the laslt two tri-mesters of the school year. He spent

most of grade school in self contained classrooms. Starting in 5th

grade, they began to gradually move him into a regular classroom,

starting with one class at a time. When he got to Junior High, he was

completely mainstreamed but had troubles. They did have a special

area where he could go when he felt the need to de-stress. Seventh,

eigth and ninth grades were a struggle. The school worked with us (we

had IEP meetings with the school, myself, 's mental health

worker, his doctor, and anyone else I felt needed to be there The

school was very good at including anyone we felt had valid input.

On 17 Dec 1996, I had placed into foster care due to the fact

that I was dealing with my own health issues, working full time,

trying to care for and take care of the house. My doctor felt

that I would have to be hospitalized if I could get a placement for

away from the home. It ws the absolutely hardest thing I havd

ever had to do. Espcially a week before Christmas. returned

home on 10 Aug 1999. We made a lot of progress during that time. He

had counseling, i had counseling, we had counseling together, and I

also took as many parenting classes as I could. I was fortunate as

was ultimately placed in a foster home less than 10 minutes from

me and it allowed him t stay in the same school he was in from home.

These foster parents had raised 11 of their own kids and three of

those were special needs. i learned a great deal from them. I was so

glad to have back home permanently!

We received in-home services and the two therapists (one to work with

me and one to work with ) were convinced that had AS. I

spent TWO full years just getting the local mental health people to

let me see the psychiatrist. He spent a whole 30 minutes looking over

's OLD files and said " no, he doesn't have it " . Fortunately the

Special Ed person at the school was able to help us get testing done

and it was then we were given the AS diagnosis. The doctor gave us a

NINE PAGE report. Two pages were filled with suggestions for the

school on how best to help . In the 10th grade I tried at

the regular high school but it didn't work out. After 6 days I

had to pull him out and the school district had a teacher come to the

house once a week to work with him. In april of that year, was

accepted in the alternative high school for out district (which just

happened to be about a mile from our house). It was an absolutely

amazing transformation in . Where before (Junior High) he didn't

want to go to school and we had lots of struggles with that - at the

alternative high school, i couldn't keep him home is high

functioning and it worked out well for him to

walk to school. School started at 7:50 a.m. and if I would let him he

would have left the house at 6:00. We compromised and he left the

house at 7:10. He got out of school at 12:45 and then walked home.

He really enjoyed this school - the class sizes were 10-12 students

and they were regular (not special ed) students who couldn't fit into

the retular high school.

made friends with several of the teachers and had nick names for

some of them (evil genious, dungeon master and the village idiot).

The teachers allowed this as long as it was just the two of them. If

there were other students, had to address him as the students

normally were supposed to. didn't have a problemwith that as he

really liked them. The school arranged for him to have the use of a

lap top during class hours (he checked it out at the first of the day

and turned it in before leaving for the day). It made a BIG

difference to him. The teaches, staff, dr and I kept in close touch

about once a week so that everyone knew what was going on. He ()

knew that what happened one place happened others and everything was

consistent. It worked very well. graduated in June of 05 with

a regular diploma - he earned every credit iand I have to tell you

that mom sat in the front row at gradfuation and cried through the

whole thing.

I am truly looking forward to being a member of this group and sharing

my experiences and learning from others. is chronologically 22

years old but functinally is 10 years old. He had I get frustrated a

lot sometimes and I am trying very hard to do the best I can. I am

hoping to be able to learn a great deal from everyone here.

Thaks so much for letting me be a member.

hugs.................judith (aka ladybug)