Re: Anyone with a child with bad thought ocd--Please help!

July 10, 2006

I am having such a hard time with my 4yr old son. He has an appt for meds on Wed

and I don't think I can take it until than. He has been confessing his bad

thoughts to me , crying and yelling all day long. I'm beginning to lose my mind.

This is an example of what he says, " There are worms coming out of a hole in

my eye "

Are there worms in there? I see myself eating my penis. Am I eating my

penis? I'm eating cement. Is there poison in my mouth? Help me. Am I going to

die? I see myself with my hands on your neck with the blood squirting out and

your dead. Am I going to die? I hate you. I love you. I didn't say that. " I'm

going to hit you. I'm not going to. I see my face split open with a ball in it

rolling around.

I could go on and on. today has been a nightmare.

If anyone has ever experienced this please respond! I have never seen

anything like this. My daughter has ocd, but NOTHING like this!!!!!!!

Judy

mom to Brittany-11-NT -going into 6th gr-high honor student

-Brittany's twin-3-29-95--4-7-95

-9-bp,ocd,adhd,odd,pdd-nos,75mg trazadone 75mg zoloft going into reg 5th

gr class-504plan

iel 4-ocd, speech problem-going into kindergarten-speech therapy, no meds

yet

July 10, 2006

Oh Judy, wow! Hang in there! Wednesday's actually not that far

away! Can you find some moments for yourself?? Note I

said " moments " as even a tiny bit helps keep you sane sometimes.

How does he react when you respond? Do you just have to say " no " or

is there more to it? I assume he's crying because he's upset by all

the constant thoughts? Hard to believe when you are on

the " receiving " end of the questions, but he's probably feeling a

bit " insane " himself!

I didn't have all the constant questions/chatter with . But

when things (3 boys, single mom) were bad, I would find a bit of time

for myself when I could. Like take a long shower; keep a book in the

bathroom to read (boy, some days I made many bathroom trips!); treat

yourself and sit and eat some favorite food/snack (you can answer him

between bites); put on some favorite music; go for a walk (even a

short one).... Just anything you can think of to " grab " a bit of

time for yourself.

When could take hours just getting into bed (had to try again

& again until it was " right " ), I would sit at the computer in his

room and play a game like solitaire or minesweeper or something to

concentrate on, read news headlines, something to sort of distract

me; that way I was there to encourage him ( " you can do it, " you've

always gotten thru it before, you'll get thru it this time, " ...). I

got so I could stay " uninvolved " to an extent, sort of matter-of-fact

about it (encouraging/responding to him)...if that makes any kind of

sense. Plus I just couldn't go on to bed while he was dealing with

that.

(Not that I didn't have my bad nights and complain about how much *I*

wanted to go to bed, had to work in the a.m., etc., etc. - for which

I would later apologize for my impatience, as he *was* really trying;

he was more sick & tired of his OCD than I was). Sometimes I'd take

a book to read in there. But it was a bit of a break in one way even

though I was still sitting there waiting for my son to get through

this OCD " episode " each night. That bedtime issue was one of the

longer lasting ones through those first years of OCD. -- Anyway,

just an example of a way to grab a bit of time while still in the

midst of it all!

Sometimes humor/joking can work well with responding to the constant

questions.

Does he understand anything yet about the OCD " monster " (or whatever)

making him have these bad thoughts??

Wish I had some solutions for you. But until Wednesday, just hang in

there! Hey, turn on the shower for effect, but sit in there and

read!

>

> I am having such a hard time with my 4yr old son. He has an appt

for meds on Wed and I don't think I can take it until than. He has

been confessing his bad thoughts to me , crying and yelling all day

long. I'm beginning to lose my mind.

> This is an example of what he says, " There are worms coming out

of a hole in my eye "

> Are there worms in there? I see myself eating my penis. Am I

eating my penis? I'm eating cement. Is there poison in my mouth?

Help me. Am I going to die? I see myself with my hands on your neck

July 10, 2006

Dear Judy,

I will second Chris's WOW!! It sounds like your son's bad

thoughts have exploded! (PANDAS?) I am so sorry to hear about how

difficult things are becoming for your family. I was wondering the

same thing as Chris. Does your son know anything about the " sticky

thought monster " (as my son used to say), or the junk mail his brain

is sending him (it looks and acts important, but it is really junk

that should be discarded and ignored)? These are all ideas from

Tamar Chansky's book, " Freeing Your Child From Obsessive Compulsive

Disorder " . I know your son is very young but Tamar has some

wonderful ways of explaining these ideas to children. You could

challenge your son and give him a specified # of tickets he can use

when he feels he needs to share these thoughts with you(confessing

the thoughts teaches the brain they are more important than they

really are and reinforces their occurence--confessing helps feed the

sticky thought monster and makes him get bigger and bigger! Lets

starve the sticky thought monster! Throw those thoughts away!).

Try to make it fun! " When the tickets are all gone, mommy can't

listen to the sticky thought monser anymore! "

Judy, I hope Wednesday brings you some light at the end of the

tunnel. We are going through a waxing period around here ourselves

and I know how discouraging it can be! Hang in there and try some

of Chris's great ideas for taking care of " you " ! ((HUGS))--Adrien

July 10, 2006

Oh Judy, that is so hard. I have not experienced anything like it, but I know

it is hard to take time to take care of yourself when you are so hurting for

your son. I remember when my son was really bad I could not eat at all. My mom

actually was visiting us and would force bananas down my throat. She kept

saying, " you can't help him if you don't take care of yourself " . you know it is

true, but you don't really care at the time.

I remember calling my mom in the middle of the night (who was visiting my

aunt) and just crying and crying. I called my sister the next day and she just

said, Oh, okay - I'm sure he'll be fine. I emailed my Bishop who said " just

tell him to think of something else to get his mind off of it. " You really

can't talk to people who don't understand - except for a mother. She always

understands, which is why your son is so lucky to have you.

I am going to bed now and will say my prayers for you and your son. I know

that if you can just hang on until his appt, it always feels so much better

after you've gone and you feel like you are on a path to things getting better.

I think the waiting part is worse than anything. One more day ... and just know

that emotionally we're all there with you.

Your Friend,

jchabot <jchabot@...> wrote:

I am having such a hard time with my 4yr old son. He has an appt for

meds on Wed and I don't think I can take it until than. He has been confessing

his bad thoughts to me , crying and yelling all day long. I'm beginning to lose

my mind.

This is an example of what he says, " There are worms coming out of a hole in my

eye "

Are there worms in there? I see myself eating my penis. Am I eating my penis?

I'm eating cement. Is there poison in my mouth? Help me. Am I going to die? I

see myself with my hands on your neck with the blood squirting out and your

dead. Am I going to die? I hate you. I love you. I didn't say that. " I'm going

to hit you. I'm not going to. I see my face split open with a ball in it rolling

around.

I could go on and on. today has been a nightmare.

If anyone has ever experienced this please respond! I have never seen anything

like this. My daughter has ocd, but NOTHING like this!!!!!!!

Judy

mom to Brittany-11-NT -going into 6th gr-high honor student

-Brittany's twin-3-29-95--4-7-95

-9-bp,ocd,adhd,odd,pdd-nos,75mg trazadone 75mg zoloft going into reg 5th

gr class-504plan

iel 4-ocd, speech problem-going into kindergarten-speech therapy, no meds

yet

July 10, 2006

Judy,

It's going to be okay. Write it all down, keep him safe, let him

know he is safe because you are there!

My son's experience with starting an ssri (and my own) is that the

bad thought part of it is the first to go . . . the calming of all

the madness can start right away.

I say 'write it all down' because a year from now you can read it

over and cry with relief at how your son has his life back.

My son (not diagnosed until 14) learned early on NOT to tell me all

his bad thoughts because it upset me. Take comfort in knowing that

he is still giving you his thoughts in hopes you can help. . . and

you need to know that you can!!!!

All my thoughts and love and support and concern,

> I am having such a hard time with my 4yr old son. He has

an appt for meds on Wed and I don't think I can take it until than.

He has been confessing his bad thoughts to me , crying and yelling

all day long. I'm beginning to lose my mind.

> This is an example of what he says, " There are worms coming out of

a hole in my eye "

> Are there worms in there? I see myself eating my penis. Am I eating

my penis? I'm eating cement. Is there poison in my mouth? Help me. Am

I going to die? I see myself with my hands on your neck with the

blood squirting out and your dead. Am I going to die? I hate you. I

love you. I didn't say that. " I'm going to hit you. I'm not going to.

I see my face split open with a ball in it rolling around.

>

> I could go on and on. today has been a nightmare.

> If anyone has ever experienced this please respond! I have never

seen anything like this. My daughter has ocd, but NOTHING like

this!!!!!!!

>

> Judy

> mom to Brittany-11-NT -going into 6th gr-high honor student

> -Brittany's twin-3-29-95--4-7-95

> -9-bp,ocd,adhd,odd,pdd-nos,75mg trazadone 75mg zoloft going

into reg 5th gr class-504plan

> iel 4-ocd, speech problem-going into kindergarten-speech

therapy, no meds yet

>

July 11, 2006

I wish I had a great answer for you. It sounds so tough. Is he doing

that all day? Can you distract him in any way - even for a while with

something he likes to do so that you can grab 5 or 10 minutes here and

there? Can anyone sit with him for even just a little while so you

can regroup? Get yourself some take out food so that you don't have

that on top of everything else? Send the older kids to their friends

for a little while? If sleep is an issue, give him Bendaryl (since he

isn't on meds) at about 7pm so he (and you) sleep good tonight. When

you have your appointment, see if they will prescribe a mild sedative

(Ativan .25mg) to use in an emergency. It will take a while for meds

to kick in.

I will be thinking of you.

Bonnie

>

> I am having such a hard time with my 4yr old son. He has an appt for

meds on Wed and I don't think I can take it until than. He has been

confessing his bad thoughts to me , crying and yelling all day long.

I'm beginning to lose my mind.

> This is an example of what he says, " There are worms coming out of

a hole in my eye "

> Are there worms in there? I see myself eating my penis. Am I

eating my penis? I'm eating cement. Is there poison in my mouth? Help

me. Am I going to die? I see myself with my hands on your neck with

the blood squirting out and your dead. Am I going to die? I hate you.

I love you. I didn't say that. " I'm going to hit you. I'm not going

to. I see my face split open with a ball in it rolling around.

>

> I could go on and on. today has been a nightmare.

> If anyone has ever experienced this please respond! I have never

seen anything like this. My daughter has ocd, but NOTHING like

this!!!!!!!

>

> Judy

> mom to Brittany-11-NT -going into 6th gr-high honor student

> -Brittany's twin-3-29-95--4-7-95

> -9-bp,ocd,adhd,odd,pdd-nos,75mg trazadone 75mg zoloft going

into reg 5th gr class-504plan

> iel 4-ocd, speech problem-going into kindergarten-speech

therapy, no meds yet

>

July 11, 2006

Dear Bonnie,

My son had a severe onset similar to this right after his 5th birthday and

MMR/DPT vaccination. It is very traumatizing to feel so helpless against their

suffering especially when they are a bit young to understand what is going on. I

can still remember that like it was yesterday - it was like 24 hours a day and

we were so tired and so worried. We didn't have any experience with OCD so we

were completely stunned by it. We gave him a lot of love and had him sleep with

us when he was having so much trouble. Playing sports outside seemed to help a

little for him. He is now like a basketball star at 6-1/2 because he would shoot

baskets so much when he was really having a hard time last year. I think

dribbling the ball seemed to give him some peace. We have had good success with

ERP therapy and also penicillin. He felt relieved when we took him to the OCD

kids support group to see other kids with the same problem. My son is doing ok

now.

>

> From: " rnmomo2 " <rnmomo2@...>

> Date: 2006/07/11 Tue PM 04:25:38 EDT

>

> Subject: Re: Anyone with a child with bad thought

ocd--Please help!

>

> I wish I had a great answer for you. It sounds so tough. Is he doing

> that all day? Can you distract him in any way - even for a while with

> something he likes to do so that you can grab 5 or 10 minutes here and

> there? Can anyone sit with him for even just a little while so you

> can regroup? Get yourself some take out food so that you don't have

> that on top of everything else? Send the older kids to their friends

> for a little while? If sleep is an issue, give him Bendaryl (since he

> isn't on meds) at about 7pm so he (and you) sleep good tonight. When

> you have your appointment, see if they will prescribe a mild sedative

> (Ativan .25mg) to use in an emergency. It will take a while for meds

> to kick in.

>

> I will be thinking of you.

>

> Bonnie

>

> >

> > I am having such a hard time with my 4yr old son. He has an appt for

> meds on Wed and I don't think I can take it until than. He has been

> confessing his bad thoughts to me , crying and yelling all day long.

> I'm beginning to lose my mind.

> > This is an example of what he says, " There are worms coming out of

> a hole in my eye "

> > Are there worms in there? I see myself eating my penis. Am I

> eating my penis? I'm eating cement. Is there poison in my mouth? Help

> me. Am I going to die? I see myself with my hands on your neck with

> the blood squirting out and your dead. Am I going to die? I hate you.

> I love you. I didn't say that. " I'm going to hit you. I'm not going

> to. I see my face split open with a ball in it rolling around.

> >

> > I could go on and on. today has been a nightmare.

> > If anyone has ever experienced this please respond! I have never

> seen anything like this. My daughter has ocd, but NOTHING like

> this!!!!!!!

> >

> > Judy

> > mom to Brittany-11-NT -going into 6th gr-high honor student

> > -Brittany's twin-3-29-95--4-7-95

> > -9-bp,ocd,adhd,odd,pdd-nos,75mg trazadone 75mg zoloft going

> into reg 5th gr class-504plan

> > iel 4-ocd, speech problem-going into kindergarten-speech

> therapy, no meds yet

> >

July 11, 2006