Re: A po-em.

[Guest guest]

I think a good lesson from this is about how WE need to educate our families about autism. Let your child stay at a relative’s house for a few hours- or even overnight. Tell them about events. Share pictures. Get them more involved in your life. Invite them along to a conference or workshop. Bring them to a non-AS walk. Email them an A-champ alert.

My family members (about 30 people) have NEVER said anything to me about my son or being a parent- except when some of them saw Berle and asked “why can’t you do chelation on like Baxter had?”. We have discussions over the Thanksgiving table about how the diet works- or chelation- or why stims.

Yes, some families are just full of jerky people and they are never going to understand anything, especially autism. But, I think part of our job as parents is WE have to take the first step and extend our hand. I think most people would appreciate information that would allow them to better understand their own family.

I have family from all over the country, some of whom see my son about once every 2-4 years. But, I try to keep them in the loop as much as possible. I do that with the blog and you tube clips.

For those who can’t understand or don’t care- F ‘em. Their loss- cause my kid is amazing.

On 12/24/07 1:16 PM, " autismlink " <cindy@...> wrote:

I don't have any idea where this came from. Well, maybe I do. My

sister in law stopped by, and I sat here thinking after she left that

after 10 years of knowing my son, she still doesn't get it...... so

these silly words flowed, and I thought I'd share them with those of

you who have to deal with relatives who just don't get it over the

holiday.

W.

*****************

I don't know why I wrote this. I was sitting here thinking (after my

sister in law left I think) about all of us that have to go through

relatives that don't understand autism. The insensitive

remarks....the holidays are tough for us. So I just started writing,

and this came out.

********************************************

Twas the Night Before Christmas

And all through the house

The creatures were stirring

Yes, even the mouse

We tried melatonin

And gave a hot bath

But the holiday jitters

They always distract

The children were finally

All nestled in bed

When nightmares of terror

Ran through my OWN head

Did I get the right gift

The right color

And style

Would there be a tantrum

Or even, maybe, a smile?

Our relatives come

But they don't understand

The pleasure he gets

Just from flapping his hands.

" He needs discipline, " they say

" Just a well-needed smack,

You must learn to parent.. "

And on goes the attack

We smile and nod

Because we know deep inside

The argument is moot

Let them all take a side

We know what it's like

To live with the spectrum

The struggles and triumphs

Achievements, regressions∑.

But what they don't know

And what they don't see

Is the joy that we feel

Over simplicity

He said " hello "

He ate something green!

He told his first lie!

He did not cause a scene!

He peed on the potty

Who cares if he's ten,

He stopped saying the same thing

Again and again!

Others don't realize

Just how we can cope

How we bravely we hang on

At the end of our rope

But what they don't see

Is the joy we can't hide

When our children with autism

Make the tiniest stride

We may look at others

Without the problems we face

With jealousy, hatred

Or even distaste,

But what they don't know

Nor sometimes do we

Is that children with autism

Bring simplicity.

We don't get excited

Over expensive things

We jump for joy

With the progress work brings

Children with autism

Try hard every day

That they make us proud

More than words can say.

They work even harder

Than you or I

To achieve something small

To reach a star in the sky

So to those who don't get it

Or can't get a clue

Take a walk in my shoes

And I'll assure you∑

That even 10 minutes

Into the walk

You'll look at me

With the respect, even shock.

You will realize

What it is I go through

And the next time you judge

I can assure you

That you won't say a thing

You'll be quiet and learn,

Like the years that I did

When the tables were turned.

[Guest guest]

I have a different poem about my first gfcf Christmas:

December 14, 2001

'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house

Mamma was in the kitchen stirring with flour on her blouse

The stockings were hung by the chimney haphazard

For the kids kept pulling them down and they were looking haggard

Daddy was sitting scared in the den

For Mamma was at it with gluten-free cooking again

The flours were spread across the kitchen in a mess

Rice, tapioca, and guava covered Mamma's face of stress

The kids they were huddled under Daddy's favorite chair

For they knew any second they would hear the sound they could not bare

It was the same in homes all across the land

Gluten-free mothers cooking Christmas dishes planned

But along with the cooking the kids would all know it well

That smell of burning and smoldering, the sound of ringing bells

Yes, they were certain the smoke detector soon would be ringing

Then the fire department would follow, water hoses they'll be bringing

But somehow this Christmas a miracle did occur

The food somehow survived, yes it's quite good as the family concurs

Another Christmas was found to be as fun as it could be

Even through the changes of becoming gluten-free!