Re: Re: PMS caused some real regression

[Guest guest]

Carol that is of barbaric nature and this doctor must be related to the

bettlhiem guy LOL to think such things of this. I to know many, many adult

woman who are on spectrum, married and have children. They can be to taught

to be good parents and nurturing mothers but will need support like all

other areas of life. In the many years of advocacy and guest speaking never

did I to hear such a cruel statement made on a young lady of her future this

saddens me much. Give your little girl a huge hug for me and be her voice as

she may appear to not have one in life currently but it does not equate she

does not think, feel and dream as all young girls do. I to wrote a quote

much year back and it to say this, " I can sit back and allow life to give

me everything I think I deserve, or I can learn to overcome my challenges

and offer myself a deserving life. " This quote has helped remind me each day

that I can be to have things in life like any other person I to just have to

work harder to achieve it. The best advice I can be to give to all is to

empower your daughters to know they are beautiful, that their dreams and

thingings do matter and help them to achieve the goals, the most important

things in life are often not what society dictates but what your child

dictates to you. Some just want a quality of life with dignity in who they

are in life, some want careers, some want marriages. Even our non verbal

daughters and girls are much like any other little girl, they are there more

than one knows they just lack ability to demonstrate it in ways NT people

understand. The non verbal girls dream, think and have profound emotions too

it is deep within them but no way to communicate it via words or body

language but if you watch their actions and their interest and play you will

see what I to share is true. I to see it much even when watching the non

verbal girls some are so much fascinated in observing themselves in the

mirror watching themselves observing natural body development and they to

show pride and yet confusions like all girls if one simply watches them.

Talk to them as though they were blind not deaf, for most of then are able

to hear and absorb the words and such at higher than you think they are

capable. Treat them in this regards as if they are typical, always treat

them as if they were typical except keep close to hear the knowing of their

limitations,, is it a true limitation or is it reflective of your own fears

they will not do this with success. Never to limit them. If they are not

learning it is not because they cant be to learn it is because the approach

is not making any sense to them , so approach it differently. Many of them

need strong visuals to guide then and need to be shown in ways they

understand.

An example being one little girl I to be gined to work with last year when I

to be to first comed and to watched her in observations she wasn't expected

to learn, she was just allowed to do her thing. The teacher to shared her IQ

scores were very low and that she was so behind the others that she often

let her listen to books on tape while the other children were taught. Now

this teacher was a very good teacher but feel in the mold that this child

was unteachable as the reports shared. I to began my work showing the

opposite was true. In her resource room they were still working on beginning

letter sounds , I later to discovered this child could read and read fairly

well, she self taught herself to read. The resource teacher not knowing this

limited her learning by staying focused on one areas when the child had

already mastered it and yet was subjected to this torture daily LOL this

little girl could read over 200 words and was reading at an emerging reader

in winter of her first grade. She was then taught math and began to show

strong abilities in the math but in adapted ways and thus this little girl

in now in second grade and reading at beginning second grade level, doing

basic math and such and keeping up with her peers for most part. Her

behaviors are still being worked on for her to be more functional in the

class as a whole and for most part is blending in now and the peers are

including her and wanting to be friends with her, and she too seeks them out

for friendships. So the fact I to be sharing if no one to tested the waters

to see where she to be for the real of her thinking and learning she to

still be working on those beginning letter sounds LOL but because we to

explored it and pushed past the misconceptions have discovered a little girl

who is more like other little girls in her own unique way. So for this this

little girl is happier and is making true friendships in life for herself. I

to still work as her one to one support but the fact is this little girl

will make it to adult hood with dignity in life. Lastly autism is not a dx

of doom and no hope, it is a dx of hidden potential and treasures. Like all

who are seeking a treasure you to know you have to search for it and dig

many holes until you find it. Don't give up hope as she will make it too in

life if you to help guide her and let her know in your heart you believe she

can.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

That was the most encouraging email I have ever read.............i for

one will not give up that my daughter can have a fullfilling life as she

gets older..it may not match up to what we would call a life we would

want personally, but hopefully it will be what she wants, with love and

encouragement all the way!! Cheryl S [australia]

Re: Re: PMS caused some real regression

Carol that is of barbaric nature and this doctor must be related to the

bettlhiem guy LOL to think such things of this. I to know many, many

adult woman who are on spectrum, married and have children. They can be

to taught to be good parents and nurturing mothers but will need support

like all other areas of life. In the many years of advocacy and guest

speaking never did I to hear such a cruel statement made on a young lady

of her future this saddens me much. Give your little girl a huge hug for

me and be her voice as she may appear to not have one in life currently

but it does not equate she does not think, feel and dream as all young

girls do. I to wrote a quote much year back and it to say this, " I can

sit back and allow life to give me everything I think I deserve, or I

can learn to overcome my challenges and offer myself a deserving life. "

This quote has helped remind me each day that I can be to have things in

life like any other person I to just have to work harder to achieve it.

The best advice I can be to give to all is to empower your daughters to

know they are beautiful, that their dreams and thingings do matter and

help them to achieve the goals, the most important things in life are

often not what society dictates but what your child dictates to you.

Some just want a quality of life with dignity in who they are in life,

some want careers, some want marriages. Even our non verbal daughters

and girls are much like any other little girl, they are there more than

one knows they just lack ability to demonstrate it in ways NT people

understand. The non verbal girls dream, think and have profound emotions

too it is deep within them but no way to communicate it via words or

body language but if you watch their actions and their interest and play

you will see what I to share is true. I to see it much even when

watching the non verbal girls some are so much fascinated in observing

themselves in the mirror watching themselves observing natural body

development and they to show pride and yet confusions like all girls if

one simply watches them. Talk to them as though they were blind not

deaf, for most of then are able to hear and absorb the words and such at

higher than you think they are capable. Treat them in this regards as if

they are typical, always treat them as if they were typical except keep

close to hear the knowing of their limitations,, is it a true limitation

or is it reflective of your own fears they will not do this with

success. Never to limit them. If they are not learning it is not because

they cant be to learn it is because the approach is not making any sense

to them , so approach it differently. Many of them need strong visuals

to guide then and need to be shown in ways they understand. An example

being one little girl I to be gined to work with last year when I to be

to first comed and to watched her in observations she wasn't expected to

learn, she was just allowed to do her thing. The teacher to shared her

IQ scores were very low and that she was so behind the others that she

often let her listen to books on tape while the other children were

taught. Now this teacher was a very good teacher but feel in the mold

that this child was unteachable as the reports shared. I to began my

work showing the opposite was true. In her resource room they were still

working on beginning letter sounds , I later to discovered this child

could read and read fairly well, she self taught herself to read. The

resource teacher not knowing this limited her learning by staying

focused on one areas when the child had already mastered it and yet was

subjected to this torture daily LOL this little girl could read over 200

words and was reading at an emerging reader in winter of her first

grade. She was then taught math and began to show strong abilities in

the math but in adapted ways and thus this little girl in now in second

grade and reading at beginning second grade level, doing basic math and

such and keeping up with her peers for most part. Her behaviors are

still being worked on for her to be more functional in the class as a

whole and for most part is blending in now and the peers are including

her and wanting to be friends with her, and she too seeks them out for

friendships. So the fact I to be sharing if no one to tested the waters

to see where she to be for the real of her thinking and learning she to

still be working on those beginning letter sounds LOL but because we to

explored it and pushed past the misconceptions have discovered a little

girl who is more like other little girls in her own unique way. So for

this this little girl is happier and is making true friendships in life

for herself. I to still work as her one to one support but the fact is

this little girl will make it to adult hood with dignity in life. Lastly

autism is not a dx of doom and no hope, it is a dx of hidden potential

and treasures. Like all who are seeking a treasure you to know you have

to search for it and dig many holes until you find it. Don't give up

hope as she will make it too in life if you to help guide her and let

her know in your heart you believe she can. Sondra

[Guest guest]

Yes I to be in to the fine arts. I to never be to know can use my strengths

to benefit self until 2 years ago when I to met a psychologist in my areas

who to see me as a person with ability instead of an autistic woman. I to

currently write much in poetry and such and have self published some of my

own work and then sell them for to raise money for autism groups so this in

itself helps me to know I to be to have strengths in life. She sounds much

like a typical little girl to me too as she to jump from thinking to

thinking as all typical girls do and in time her ability to be what she

wants will fall in place. She will never to outgrow the autism but learn to

self adapt to life over time. The more awareness she to learn of self and

how the autism effects her the less hard she will be on self and allow for

mistakes in life to her, sounds like she to have a good mom who is to be

working hard to give her a quality of life she so desperately wants.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

Debbie you to have it, you are much blessed to be to see this with your

child as she to be so young but the true things are there you to need to see

them for what they are.

One comment to say about your child to used video scripts when upset , she

to be using them for a reason, something she to connected with that video

has stuck in her thinking and she to use it inthe way she to processed it.

So if you can be to watch this video closely try to discover what she may

have picked up from it as a script to communicate a thought to you by this

method.

The little girl I to be to work for is much like me in many ways as a child

and her fixations are to be of the mermaid too.

Another sharing when I to be to first started this year in her second grade

class she to had none from last year in this class so I to be to have to

reteach all the new children on this child. I to created a story about her

and things they may see or feel this school year in regards to this child. I

to at first was unsure if I to be to have the child there or not and so I to

taked her aside and asked her , even though she is much limited in verbal

expressions I to asked if she to wanted to stay or leave when I to teached

the other children of autism. She wanted to stay. I to be so much nervous to

be to do this infront of her but did be to do this. Right after wards the

child and I to left to go to her quiet room for 1 to 1 teaching and I to

asked her how I to be to do , she to spontaneously gave me a high five and

said you did great , I to be so proud of you. I to say to her did I to

forget anything she to say, No you did great LOL now this is a child who is

very reserved in sharing her thinking but this day she did and the

excitement in her voice and body let me to know I to be to made the right

choice to let her be a part of it.

One behavior we have though in working with her is everytime we to go to the

carpet for story time she to be to wanted to sing like Ariel in the sea???

so I to have to teach her I to not be allowed to work with Ariel as I can be

to only work with her, I to taked her to hall way and showed her the roster

that no Ariel was assigned to this class and such and told her Ariel can

come to visit at recess and play time and she can sing all she to be to want

in the sea at those times. I to be to work but took time to come up with

this plan of action LOL She to be to be so connected to me and to know when

even I to mess up with my own autism issues and will pat my back and say to

me poor miss Sondra LOL she is my sunshine girl and I to be to truly love

this precious little girl who is so much like me as a child.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

Debi-I also look forward to that day in heaven. And, I agree, we are the ones

who need to learn from them. Pati

Re: PMS caused some real regression

I could not agree more with this wonderfully-written explanation of

future women who happen to be autistic. My three year old cannot

express herself well...yet. When she gets angry she will look at me,

crying and yelling and say, " ARIAL...FLOUNDER...TRITON...GUPPY! " as

if she cannot find the appropriate words to tell me how she feels.

But, when I take her to the mirror to brush her hair and she looks at

herself up and down with a sweet smile and I say, " God made you... "

and she finishes by saying, " beautiful! " then I see how much it means

to her.

When we freaked out because her sister, then 2 weeks old, was

suddenly not in her infant swing and found Allie sitting in a corner

gently holding her baby sister, we could see then her desire to love

this tiny being just like everyone else. When I don't think she

understands why her baby sister nurses from my breast, only to find

her shirtless trying to put her nipple in her sister's mouth, then I

see her desires to be a good mommy one day.

The more I meet people who have special challenges like autism,

down's, cerebral palsy, the more I realize they are just like you and

me. Often times I believe it is we who have the disability by not

seeing their beauty. It reminds me of the Bible verse (can't remember

the reference) " the least of these will be the greatest in Heaven. "

There's a Christian song called " Imagine " about imagining what we

will do when we meet Jesus in Heaven. He talks about whether he will

sing, dance, or fall to his knees speechless. Every time I hear that

song I imagine the children at Allie's school who couldn't walk being

the ones dancing before Him, and our children who have difficulty

expressing themselves using the most profound words to praise Him,

and all us parents being the ones unable to walk or talk from the

experience. I know the song's supposed to be about Jesus, but I think

the vision I hold is very appropriate for what He has to offer.

Just my thoughts.

Debi

> Carol that is of barbaric nature and this doctor must be related to

the

> bettlhiem guy LOL to think such things of this. I to know many,

many adult

> woman who are on spectrum, married and have children. They can be

to taught

> to be good parents and nurturing mothers but will need support like

all

> other areas of life. In the many years of advocacy and guest

speaking never

> did I to hear such a cruel statement made on a young lady of her

future this

> saddens me much. Give your little girl a huge hug for me and be her

voice as

> she may appear to not have one in life currently but it does not

equate she

> does not think, feel and dream as all young girls do. I to wrote a

quote

> much year back and it to say this, " I can sit back and allow life

to give

> me everything I think I deserve, or I can learn to overcome my

challenges

> and offer myself a deserving life. " This quote has helped remind me

each day

> that I can be to have things in life like any other person I to

just have to

> work harder to achieve it. The best advice I can be to give to all

is to

> empower your daughters to know they are beautiful, that their

dreams and

> thingings do matter and help them to achieve the goals, the most

important

> things in life are often not what society dictates but what your

child

> dictates to you. Some just want a quality of life with dignity in

who they

> are in life, some want careers, some want marriages. Even our non

verbal

> daughters and girls are much like any other little girl, they are

there more

> than one knows they just lack ability to demonstrate it in ways NT

people

> understand. The non verbal girls dream, think and have profound

emotions too

> it is deep within them but no way to communicate it via words or

body

> language but if you watch their actions and their interest and play

you will

> see what I to share is true. I to see it much even when watching

the non

> verbal girls some are so much fascinated in observing themselves in

the

> mirror watching themselves observing natural body development and

they to

> show pride and yet confusions like all girls if one simply watches

them.

> Talk to them as though they were blind not deaf, for most of then

are able

> to hear and absorb the words and such at higher than you think they

are

> capable. Treat them in this regards as if they are typical, always

treat

> them as if they were typical except keep close to hear the knowing

of their

> limitations,, is it a true limitation or is it reflective of your

own fears

> they will not do this with success. Never to limit them. If they

are not

> learning it is not because they cant be to learn it is because the

approach

> is not making any sense to them , so approach it differently. Many

of them

> need strong visuals to guide then and need to be shown in ways they

> understand.

> An example being one little girl I to be gined to work with last

year when I

> to be to first comed and to watched her in observations she wasn't

expected

> to learn, she was just allowed to do her thing. The teacher to

shared her IQ

> scores were very low and that she was so behind the others that she

often

> let her listen to books on tape while the other children were

taught. Now

> this teacher was a very good teacher but feel in the mold that this

child

> was unteachable as the reports shared. I to began my work showing

the

> opposite was true. In her resource room they were still working on

beginning

> letter sounds , I later to discovered this child could read and

read fairly

> well, she self taught herself to read. The resource teacher not

knowing this

> limited her learning by staying focused on one areas when the child

had

> already mastered it and yet was subjected to this torture daily LOL

this

> little girl could read over 200 words and was reading at an

emerging reader

> in winter of her first grade. She was then taught math and began to

show

> strong abilities in the math but in adapted ways and thus this

little girl

> in now in second grade and reading at beginning second grade level,

doing

> basic math and such and keeping up with her peers for most part. Her

> behaviors are still being worked on for her to be more functional

in the

> class as a whole and for most part is blending in now and the peers

are

> including her and wanting to be friends with her, and she too seeks

them out

> for friendships. So the fact I to be sharing if no one to tested

the waters

> to see where she to be for the real of her thinking and learning

she to

> still be working on those beginning letter sounds LOL but because

we to

> explored it and pushed past the misconceptions have discovered a

little girl

> who is more like other little girls in her own unique way. So for

this this

> little girl is happier and is making true friendships in life for

herself. I

> to still work as her one to one support but the fact is this little

girl

> will make it to adult hood with dignity in life. Lastly autism is

not a dx

> of doom and no hope, it is a dx of hidden potential and treasures.

Like all

> who are seeking a treasure you to know you have to search for it

and dig

> many holes until you find it. Don't give up hope as she will make

it too in

> life if you to help guide her and let her know in your heart you

believe she

> can.

> Sondra

[Guest guest]

Debi this to be funny, the little girl I to work for loves anything related

to birthdays too, except when others birthdays come like in her class she

screams because she wants it to be hers LOL. But she has a keen memory to

everyone's birthdays and she knows them by day and month. One areas she

absorbs the facts and stores them . She to know all her aunts , uncles ,

cousins and several friends if asked about their birthday.

Sondra