Re: How are you today?

[Guest guest]

Hi nathan im fine how are you. dont know if you rememebr me. Ive been ready for school AGAIN lol and just trying to heal a sunburn. It been cooler the last three days. Lornanatronpc <globalmerchantorg@...> wrote:

It is a simple question, some persons like being asked it.

Start your day with - make it your home page

[Guest guest]

No I do not recall..

Are you going to college?

I used to get sunburn all the time. Here is has been cooler as well.girlofthehighlands <lorna1224@...> wrote:

Hi nathan im fine how are you. dont know if you rememebr me. Ive been ready for school AGAIN lol and just trying to heal a sunburn. It been cooler the last three days. Lornanatronpc <globalmerchantorg@...> wrote:

[Guest guest]

I don't think Aspies are as fond of being asked it..? (Could be wrong, though.)I'm a bit stressed from finding another 77 messages in my inbox after I was out all day yesterday (picking up stuff from my mom's and buying shelves & tools) and not having time to read and reply to more than a few of them before I need to go and work on my house again (my assistant is coming to help me with some heavy stuff soon).

Will probably be busy for the next few days too. So if I'm not online much, y'all know why.

See you when things have cooled down at my end.

Inger

It is a simple question, some persons like being asked it.

[Guest guest]

" It is a simple question, some persons like being asked it. "

Well is it a case of simple being in the eye of the beholder? - to be

honest I never know how to interpret this question - as I have said

many times before. How am I in relation to what? Yesterday? (or

something else?) - yesterday morning I had migraine - so compared to

yesterday - I am better - but life still stressful - but hey what's

new?

Maybe with this question I know that the required response is 'I am

fine - how are you?' but what if I am not fine? - am I expected to

lie? and what if I don't want to know how the other person is? am I

still expected to ask? It is social politeness - I am not keen on

social politeness - too many uncertainties and sometimes lies.

If I do ask someone how they are I do want to know - but if someone

asks me - I have to start thinking - do they really want to know? are

they just being polite? I suppose it all depends on person asking and

situation etc - but I am never very good at judging these things nor

a persons true intentions or motives.

Actually thinking about it - in past I always took this question as

is - as in person must have wanted to know - otherwise they would

have not asked - little did I know many use it as a form of greeting -

I only learnt that last year.

When at college one tutor would ask me almost everyday at break time

how I was and I always proceeded to tell him - at that time in my

life I was going through a rather rough patch too. One day he started

laughing at me and this really confused me - so I asked him why he

was laughing and he said I was the only person he knew that answered

the question honestly and also hearing about how bad things were at

that time for me made him feel better - as he wasn't exactly having a

picnic with his life at that time either. I think we appreciated one

anothers honesty and I like and prefer that kind of exchange, plus we

could have a good laugh about how sh*t life was :-) at that time

anyway.

So I have a tendency now to sometimes say - 'do you really want to

know?' - so in answer to your question - 'do you really want to

know?' :-) or have I already provided more info' than I needed to ;-)

Still hope you are okay :-)

> I don't think Aspies are as fond of being asked it..? (Could be

wrong, though.)

>

> I'm a bit stressed from finding another 77 messages in my inbox

after I was out all day yesterday (picking up stuff from my mom's and

buying shelves & tools) and not having time to read and reply to more

than a few of them before I need to go and work on my house again (my

assistant is coming to help me with some heavy stuff soon).

>

> Will probably be busy for the next few days too. So if I'm not

online much, y'all know why.

>

> See you when things have cooled down at my end.

>

> Inger

>

>

>

>

>

>

> It is a simple question, some persons like being asked it.

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Usually this is a ritual question and answer thing and is just meant as a polite social gesture.

However, I am doing pretty well today. The wasp sting is pretty well healed except for one little red spot. It is also cooler today, at least so far. Yesterday it was 100 degree F and the heat index made it feel 110. That was rather hot, but I have seen worse and it was not close to a record for the month (which I think is around 105 from the 1930's).

[Guest guest]

Usually this is a ritual question and answer thing and is just meant as a polite social gesture.

However, I am doing pretty well today. The wasp sting is pretty well healed except for one little red spot. It is also cooler today, at least so far. Yesterday it was 100 degree F and the heat index made it feel 110. That was rather hot, but I have seen worse and it was not close to a record for the month (which I think is around 105 from the 1930's).

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 8/16/2005 2:46:15 PM Eastern Standard Time, rainbow@... writes:

Its purpose is to demonstrate good will, and possibly originated as a gesture showing that the hand holds no weapon.

Rainbow is correct. A handshake is a way to prove you are unarmed but also it is a measure of trust.

In Roman times, bodyguards would shake someone's hand and give it one solid pump. At the time that was usually enough to dislodge a knife hidden in the sleeve. Later on, more pumps were added, perhaps because scabbarbs became better.

It is a sign of trust because you are literaly at the other person's mercy. You are within arm's length and any strike the other person launches will very likely come up your blindzone and you won't be able to react. That cuts both ways, of course: they are also at your mercy as well.

Today a lot is read into an handshake. A weak handshake can be seen as weakness, uncertainy, fear, etc. while a strong handshake denotes strength, confidence, etc. This isn't always true since it is easy to fake grip strength and such. There were times when I was really nervous in class but could put on a brave handshake.

The hardest part for me is always hearing to give a firm handshake, is remembering not to squeeze so hard with the ladies or the elderly. A couple of times I have forgotten and I've seen it in the other person's eye and how they jerked their hand away quickly when released.

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 8/16/2005 4:23:06 PM Eastern Standard Time, globalmerchantorg@... writes:

I have never lived around or been party to others whom may or may not have had a gun.

It is a new meaning to me.

You're not likely to find someone with a gun up their sleeves, most likely a knife or just their fist, meaning the fist they aren't shaking your hand with.

I've grown up around people with guns and knives and never had a problem, well except for the idiot neighbors but they had other issues. I'll more more alert if I'm around amred people mostly for safety reasons. Not everyone carefully observes safety rules so it pays to keep your eyes open.

One thing I never do is shake a strangers hand unless people I know are around. I never shake the hand of anyone who come up to me on the street or in a store and wants to shak hands, unless I know them. That can be a classic setup for a mugging: the handshake and then bang, a left cross to the jaw. I've had people act offended because of this, but hey, its better to err on the side of caution.

[Guest guest]

I usually respond ok, then one is supposed to usually ask the other person how are you? Typically and to be honest I could care less. However to show niceness I just did it here.

I'd have to say typicaly persons are not looking for an honest answer such as when I respond with the truth.

greebohere <julie.stevenson16@...> wrote:

"It is a simple question, some persons like being asked it."Well is it a case of simple being in the eye of the beholder? - to be honest I never know how to interpret this question - as I have said many times before. How am I in relation to what? Yesterday? (or something else?) - yesterday morning I had migraine - so compared to yesterday - I am better - but life still stressful - but hey what's new?Maybe with this question I know that the required response is 'I am fine - how are you?' but what if I am not fine? - am I expected to lie? and what if I don't want to know how the other person is? am I still expected to ask? It is social politeness - I am not keen on social politeness - too many uncertainties and sometimes lies.If I do ask someone how they are I do want to know - but if someone asks me - I have to start

thinking - do they really want to know? are they just being polite? I suppose it all depends on person asking and situation etc - but I am never very good at judging these things nor a persons true intentions or motives.Actually thinking about it - in past I always took this question as is - as in person must have wanted to know - otherwise they would have not asked - little did I know many use it as a form of greeting -I only learnt that last year.When at college one tutor would ask me almost everyday at break time how I was and I always proceeded to tell him - at that time in my life I was going through a rather rough patch too. One day he started laughing at me and this really confused me - so I asked him why he was laughing and he said I was the only person he knew that answered the question honestly and also hearing about how bad things were at that time for me made him feel better - as he wasn't exactly having a

picnic with his life at that time either. I think we appreciated one anothers honesty and I like and prefer that kind of exchange, plus we could have a good laugh about how sh*t life was :-) at that time anyway.So I have a tendency now to sometimes say - 'do you really want to know?' - so in answer to your question - 'do you really want to know?' :-) or have I already provided more info' than I needed to ;-)Still hope you are okay :-)> I don't think Aspies are as fond of being asked it..? (Could be wrong, though.)> > I'm a bit stressed from finding another 77 messages in my inbox after I was out all day yesterday (picking up stuff from my mom's and buying shelves & tools) and not having time to read and reply to more than a few of them before I need to go and work on my house again (my

assistant is coming to help me with some heavy stuff soon). > > Will probably be busy for the next few days too. So if I'm not online much, y'all know why. > > See you when things have cooled down at my end.> > Inger > > > > > > > It is a simple question, some persons like being asked it. > > > >

[Guest guest]

I usually respond ok, then one is supposed to usually ask the other person how are you? Typically and to be honest I could care less. However to show niceness I just did it here.

I'd have to say typicaly persons are not looking for an honest answer such as when I respond with the truth.

greebohere <julie.stevenson16@...> wrote:

"It is a simple question, some persons like being asked it."Well is it a case of simple being in the eye of the beholder? - to be honest I never know how to interpret this question - as I have said many times before. How am I in relation to what? Yesterday? (or something else?) - yesterday morning I had migraine - so compared to yesterday - I am better - but life still stressful - but hey what's new?Maybe with this question I know that the required response is 'I am fine - how are you?' but what if I am not fine? - am I expected to lie? and what if I don't want to know how the other person is? am I still expected to ask? It is social politeness - I am not keen on social politeness - too many uncertainties and sometimes lies.If I do ask someone how they are I do want to know - but if someone asks me - I have to start

thinking - do they really want to know? are they just being polite? I suppose it all depends on person asking and situation etc - but I am never very good at judging these things nor a persons true intentions or motives.Actually thinking about it - in past I always took this question as is - as in person must have wanted to know - otherwise they would have not asked - little did I know many use it as a form of greeting -I only learnt that last year.When at college one tutor would ask me almost everyday at break time how I was and I always proceeded to tell him - at that time in my life I was going through a rather rough patch too. One day he started laughing at me and this really confused me - so I asked him why he was laughing and he said I was the only person he knew that answered the question honestly and also hearing about how bad things were at that time for me made him feel better - as he wasn't exactly having a

picnic with his life at that time either. I think we appreciated one anothers honesty and I like and prefer that kind of exchange, plus we could have a good laugh about how sh*t life was :-) at that time anyway.So I have a tendency now to sometimes say - 'do you really want to know?' - so in answer to your question - 'do you really want to know?' :-) or have I already provided more info' than I needed to ;-)Still hope you are okay :-)> I don't think Aspies are as fond of being asked it..? (Could be wrong, though.)> > I'm a bit stressed from finding another 77 messages in my inbox after I was out all day yesterday (picking up stuff from my mom's and buying shelves & tools) and not having time to read and reply to more than a few of them before I need to go and work on my house again (my

assistant is coming to help me with some heavy stuff soon). > > Will probably be busy for the next few days too. So if I'm not online much, y'all know why. > > See you when things have cooled down at my end.> > Inger > > > > > > > It is a simple question, some persons like being asked it. > > > >

[Guest guest]

To be honest, my instinctive response is to say " Leave me alone " Or

else " None of your business. " But I usually say " Fine. How are you? "

Tom

I usually respond ok, then one is supposed to usually ask the other

person how are you? Typically and to be honest I could care less.

However to show niceness I just did it here.

I'd have to say typicaly persons are not looking for an honest answer

such as when I respond with the truth.

[Guest guest]

To be honest, my instinctive response is to say " Leave me alone " Or

else " None of your business. " But I usually say " Fine. How are you? "

Tom

I usually respond ok, then one is supposed to usually ask the other

person how are you? Typically and to be honest I could care less.

However to show niceness I just did it here.

I'd have to say typicaly persons are not looking for an honest answer

such as when I respond with the truth.

[Guest guest]

I've only had to use the "leave me alone" statement a few times. Specifically to my manager that I had also posted here about.. By the way she was fired.

If in person communication I could only talk about my interests without them talking that would be good.

environmental1st2003 <no_reply > wrote:

To be honest, my instinctive response is to say "Leave me alone" Or else "None of your business." But I usually say "Fine. How are you?"TomI usually respond ok, then one is supposed to usually ask the other person how are you? Typically and to be honest I could care less. However to show niceness I just did it here.I'd have to say typicaly persons are not looking for an honest answer such as when I respond with the truth.

[Guest guest]

I've only had to use the "leave me alone" statement a few times. Specifically to my manager that I had also posted here about.. By the way she was fired.

If in person communication I could only talk about my interests without them talking that would be good.

environmental1st2003 <no_reply > wrote:

To be honest, my instinctive response is to say "Leave me alone" Or else "None of your business." But I usually say "Fine. How are you?"TomI usually respond ok, then one is supposed to usually ask the other person how are you? Typically and to be honest I could care less. However to show niceness I just did it here.I'd have to say typicaly persons are not looking for an honest answer such as when I respond with the truth.

[Guest guest]

>Tom: "To be honest, my instinctive response is to say "Leave me alone" Or else "None of your business."Mine would be to question: WHY do you want to know? Rainbow

[Guest guest]

>Tom: "To be honest, my instinctive response is to say "Leave me alone" Or else "None of your business."Mine would be to question: WHY do you want to know? Rainbow

[Guest guest]

Typically in chat it is how conversation is initiated by the other party, in my experience.

Respect and friendship are the announced principles of the group. So to ask how another is doing would be to combine those.

I can’t honestly say I genuinely care how another is though, however the act itself and at least the reading of its responses is in a way appeasing the emotionality of responses.

It's like shaking hands in business. Why do such a thing? I suppose it is a gesture of subcouncious bonding and trust in a way? I didnt enjoy shaking people hands either, especially after eating.

"Rainbow ." <rainbow@...> wrote:

>Tom: "To be honest, my instinctive response is to say "Leave me alone" Or else "None of your business."

Mine would be to question: WHY do you want to know?

Rainbow

[Guest guest]

Typically in chat it is how conversation is initiated by the other party, in my experience.

Respect and friendship are the announced principles of the group. So to ask how another is doing would be to combine those.

I can’t honestly say I genuinely care how another is though, however the act itself and at least the reading of its responses is in a way appeasing the emotionality of responses.

It's like shaking hands in business. Why do such a thing? I suppose it is a gesture of subcouncious bonding and trust in a way? I didnt enjoy shaking people hands either, especially after eating.

"Rainbow ." <rainbow@...> wrote:

>Tom: "To be honest, my instinctive response is to say "Leave me alone" Or else "None of your business."

Mine would be to question: WHY do you want to know?

Rainbow

[Guest guest]

>Nathon: "It's like shaking hands in business. Why do such a thing?"Its purpose is to demonstrate good will, and possibly originated as a gesture showing that the hand holds no weapon.  Rainbow

[Guest guest]

>Nathon: "It's like shaking hands in business. Why do such a thing?"Its purpose is to demonstrate good will, and possibly originated as a gesture showing that the hand holds no weapon.  Rainbow

[Guest guest]

Nathon:

My PC hardware vendors used to call me Nathon, orientals..

Yes the good will part is good..

The gun part I would have never have thought about.

"Rainbow ." <rainbow@...> wrote:

>Nathon: "It's like shaking hands in business. Why do such a thing?"

Its purpose is to demonstrate good will, and possibly originated as a gesture showing that the hand holds no weapon.

Rainbow

[Guest guest]

Nathon:

My PC hardware vendors used to call me Nathon, orientals..

Yes the good will part is good..

The gun part I would have never have thought about.

"Rainbow ." <rainbow@...> wrote:

>Nathon: "It's like shaking hands in business. Why do such a thing?"

Its purpose is to demonstrate good will, and possibly originated as a gesture showing that the hand holds no weapon.

Rainbow

[Guest guest]

I have never lived around or been party to others whom may or may not have had a gun.

It is a new meaning to me.

VISIGOTH@... wrote:

In a message dated 8/16/2005 2:46:15 PM Eastern Standard Time, rainbow@... writes:

Its purpose is to demonstrate good will, and possibly originated as a gesture showing that the hand holds no weapon.

Rainbow is correct. A handshake is a way to prove you are unarmed but also it is a measure of trust.

In Roman times, bodyguards would shake someone's hand and give it one solid pump. At the time that was usually enough to dislodge a knife hidden in the sleeve. Later on, more pumps were added, perhaps because scabbarbs became better.

It is a sign of trust because you are literaly at the other person's mercy. You are within arm's length and any strike the other person launches will very likely come up your blindzone and you won't be able to react. That cuts both ways, of course: they are also at your mercy as well.

Today a lot is read into an handshake. A weak handshake can be seen as weakness, uncertainy, fear, etc. while a strong handshake denotes strength, confidence, etc. This isn't always true since it is easy to fake grip strength and such. There were times when I was really nervous in class but could put on a brave handshake.

The hardest part for me is always hearing to give a firm handshake, is remembering not to squeeze so hard with the ladies or the elderly. A couple of times I have forgotten and I've seen it in the other person's eye and how they jerked their hand away quickly when released.

[Guest guest]

>Nathon: "I have never lived around or been party to others whom may or may not have had a gun."Everyone is included in this statement!, 'weapon', not 'gun'. See 's preceding post.  Rainbow

[Guest guest]

ok change "gun" to weapon of any kind. I have never considered it while in the presents of another. Although I did have a gun pulled on me once.... However I wouldnt consider that as an expected and subcouncious intent to asure of myself another doesnt have a weapon of any kind.

"Rainbow ." <rainbow@...> wrote:

>Nathon: "I have never lived around or been party to others whom may or may not have had a gun."

Everyone is included in this statement!

, 'weapon', not 'gun'. See 's preceding post.

Rainbow