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Re: My 4 year old boy

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We don't have experience with a MUSIC fixation, but fixation on other things

... skateboarding, paintballing... I know exactly what you are explaining

though and I think this is a typical OCD " thing. " The fixations/obsessions do

change over time - if that's any consolation - tomorrow or next month it just

might be superheros or cars. Ya never really know what's up ahead until you get

there.

In a message dated 10/27/2005 4:56:16 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

blancaprov356@... writes:

DOes anybody know

or have heard of a child with OCD based on his fixation for music?

We feel like we don't really undertand all of this.

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Blanca,

Though the fixations can and do change I would guess that since he is

talented at music that it will stick around in some big way.

For example, my son (ocd and now 14) was and is a talented artist -

drawing to soothe himself at 3 years old - teaching himself to oil

paint at 9 years old, etc.

He reminisces about when he was your son's age - he says, " remember

when I thought my stuffed animals would attack me at night if I

didn't give them equal time and arrange them in a certain way to make

them happy? " and I say, " No, I remember you arranging your animals

but I never, never knew about why you were doing it. "

He spent much of his early childhood creating things, either with a

pencil or with tape/sock/spoons or whatever he could find. And, no,

his friends did not share his obsession/passion.

At four years old they're just bound to act four and respond to the

demands of ocd in a four year old way.

It may help to add that now, a freshman in highschool, he has picked

out the college he wants to go to so he can study animation and work

for pixar - he's also happy and healthy and (though he always had to

work hard at it) has a lot of friends, some close, some just 'old

friends' from early school.

I remember how it pained me to see his social skills in action - it

improved over time.

>

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re: " He reminisces about when he was your son's age - he

says, " remember

when I thought my stuffed animals would attack me at night if I

didn't give them equal time and arrange them in a certain way to

make

them happy? " and I say, " No, I remember you arranging your animals

but I never, never knew about why you were doing it. "

,

As best you can recall, did your son seem at all upset about his

animals, or did he seem to enjoy arranging them? My son (now 7)owns

a ton of Beanie Babies, and he went through a stage where he would

tuck several of them in " bed " at night. Each would be covered with

a tissue or an article of clothing, and sometimes each would be

placed in some kind of container as a " bed " . He seemed to enjoy

doing this, and seemed proud of the creative ideas he had come up

with for their " beds " . I never thought of this as an OCD thing

because he seemed happy about it, but your post sure sounded

familiar. Would you mind elaborating?

Thanks,

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For what it is worth, I have heard that Mozart was believed to have

had Tourette's - which fits into this family of disorders. By the

way, my son is musically talented too - he is 12. He also has been

through many phases of obsessions (not OCD-type) since he was a

toddler. There was heating and cooling systems (couldn't go anywhere

unless he could go to the outside of the building to see their

unit). He would scream and throw a fit unless we took him to see

it. There was also calendars, clocks and anything else with

numbers. He could tell time to the second (both current and

futuristically) before his 4th birthday by asking me a bazillion

questions about the clock and the numbers and markings, as I begged

him to wait (nonstop questions). He then moved into a fascination

with lawn mowers - could make the exact sound (rhythm, etc.) with his

mouth of every lawnmower in the immediate neighborhood, then there

was the presidents and all their stats, then globes/maps, etc., then

football - knows a tremendous amount of stats on many teams for many

years before his time, then he went into skateboarding, and now it is

music (guitar, drums, piano, whatever - has always had a natural ear

for music). These obsessions were ones that he enjoyed though (only

frustrated when he couldn't absorb every bit of knowledge he wanted

about them), but I guess this often goes along with someone with

OCD.

However, these obsessions were never ego-dystonic for my son (but he

would have some quirky aversions to some things - such as like you

mentioned about your son's worries about Beethoven - my son would

become very upset if he heard music he interpreted as sad, etc.). At

the time, I just attributed it to his high intelligence (was tested

intellectually gifted in 1st grade). The ego-dystonic obsessions

didn't really begin until later (4th grade) - although he was always

somewhat self conscious socially. You may see these characteristics

in your son as he grows too. On medication and with treatment, he is

doing much better socially and has lost a lot of his self-conscious

nature, and his obessions such as music are more balanced with other

things. :)

>

> Thank you to all that wrote back. It gave both my husband and I a

> sense of " We are not alone " security. To respond to the messages

on

> Ethan, well, we have tried to distract him, it is very hard and he

> grabitates back to music after a few minutes of another activity.

It

> did not use to be this way. He does seem less able to now to focus

> on other things. As I write this e-mail, he is supposedly having a

> quiet time with books, but I hear the maracas and guitar in his

> room. (so much for a quiet time). Anyway, the two dr's. we have

> seen have agreed that he does not have aspergers or any type of

> autism. They both diagnosed him with ocd/add.

> We did not take the medicine because it was hard to justify

> medicating him when he seemed to be functioning fairly ok. Now,

both

> my husband and I have now seen how much his life is getting

affected

> by his OCD.

> Ethan does have some irrational fears for example. He does not

want

> to hear Beethoven's song he composed when he found out he was going

> deaf because it scares him so much. He will cover his ears and

> scream to make it stop, so I have to skip to another song. Ethan

can

> also tell you the names of any instrument you show him. He mostly

> picks out musical books at the library. He can hear a song and

tell

> you what notes it is playing. Now that Disney put out the new

> show " Little Einsteins " that is all he will watch.

> Even if we took away all of his instruments, he would make new ones

> somehow. Pots,pans, drumming on lamps, furniture, etc. We cannot

> wait for his appointment. We now know he really does need help.

His

> friends now have to tell him that they really don't want to make a

> band or play with his instruments anymore, and he gets this very

> confusing look on his face.

> We will have to face family because most of them are in denial and

> just say Ethan is just good with music and nothing else. Thank you

> again for all your input. It was so so helpful to find out there

are

> other kids out there struggling with the same thing. Blanca

>

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For what it is worth, I have heard that Mozart was believed to have

had Tourette's - which fits into this family of disorders. By the

way, my son is musically talented too - he is 12. He also has been

through many phases of obsessions (not OCD-type) since he was a

toddler. There was heating and cooling systems (couldn't go anywhere

unless he could go to the outside of the building to see their

unit). He would scream and throw a fit unless we took him to see

it. There was also calendars, clocks and anything else with

numbers. He could tell time to the second (both current and

futuristically) before his 4th birthday by asking me a bazillion

questions about the clock and the numbers and markings, as I begged

him to wait (nonstop questions). He then moved into a fascination

with lawn mowers - could make the exact sound (rhythm, etc.) with his

mouth of every lawnmower in the immediate neighborhood, then there

was the presidents and all their stats, then globes/maps, etc., then

football - knows a tremendous amount of stats on many teams for many

years before his time, then he went into skateboarding, and now it is

music (guitar, drums, piano, whatever - has always had a natural ear

for music). These obsessions were ones that he enjoyed though (only

frustrated when he couldn't absorb every bit of knowledge he wanted

about them), but I guess this often goes along with someone with

OCD.

However, these obsessions were never ego-dystonic for my son (but he

would have some quirky aversions to some things - such as like you

mentioned about your son's worries about Beethoven - my son would

become very upset if he heard music he interpreted as sad, etc.). At

the time, I just attributed it to his high intelligence (was tested

intellectually gifted in 1st grade). The ego-dystonic obsessions

didn't really begin until later (4th grade) - although he was always

somewhat self conscious socially. You may see these characteristics

in your son as he grows too. On medication and with treatment, he is

doing much better socially and has lost a lot of his self-conscious

nature, and his obessions such as music are more balanced with other

things. :)

>

> Thank you to all that wrote back. It gave both my husband and I a

> sense of " We are not alone " security. To respond to the messages

on

> Ethan, well, we have tried to distract him, it is very hard and he

> grabitates back to music after a few minutes of another activity.

It

> did not use to be this way. He does seem less able to now to focus

> on other things. As I write this e-mail, he is supposedly having a

> quiet time with books, but I hear the maracas and guitar in his

> room. (so much for a quiet time). Anyway, the two dr's. we have

> seen have agreed that he does not have aspergers or any type of

> autism. They both diagnosed him with ocd/add.

> We did not take the medicine because it was hard to justify

> medicating him when he seemed to be functioning fairly ok. Now,

both

> my husband and I have now seen how much his life is getting

affected

> by his OCD.

> Ethan does have some irrational fears for example. He does not

want

> to hear Beethoven's song he composed when he found out he was going

> deaf because it scares him so much. He will cover his ears and

> scream to make it stop, so I have to skip to another song. Ethan

can

> also tell you the names of any instrument you show him. He mostly

> picks out musical books at the library. He can hear a song and

tell

> you what notes it is playing. Now that Disney put out the new

> show " Little Einsteins " that is all he will watch.

> Even if we took away all of his instruments, he would make new ones

> somehow. Pots,pans, drumming on lamps, furniture, etc. We cannot

> wait for his appointment. We now know he really does need help.

His

> friends now have to tell him that they really don't want to make a

> band or play with his instruments anymore, and he gets this very

> confusing look on his face.

> We will have to face family because most of them are in denial and

> just say Ethan is just good with music and nothing else. Thank you

> again for all your input. It was so so helpful to find out there

are

> other kids out there struggling with the same thing. Blanca

>

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