things I've learned - joke

[Guest guest]

As I've Matured...

I've learned that you cannot make someone love

you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they

panic and give in...

I've learned that one good turn gets most of the

blankets.

I've learned that no matter how much I care, some

people are just jackasses.

I've learned that it takes years to build up

trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to

destroy it.

I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not

be evenly distributed.

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself

to others - they are more screwed up than you

think.

I've learned that depression is merely anger

without enthusiasm.

I've learned that it is not what you wear; it is

how you take it off.

I've learned that you can keep vomiting long after

you think you're finished.

I've learned to not sweat the petty things, and

not pet the sweaty things.

I've learned that ex's are like fungus, and keep

coming back.

I've learned age is a very high price to pay for

maturity.

I've learned that I don't suffer from insanity, I

enjoy it.

I've learned that we are responsible for what we

do, unless we are celebrities.

I've learned that artificial intelligence is no

match for natural stupidity.

I've learned that 99% of the time when something

isn't working in your house, one of your kids did

it

I've learned that there is a fine line between

genius and insanity.

I've learned that the people you care most about

in life are taken from you too soon and all the

less important ones just never go away. And the

real pains in the ass are permanent.

Pass this along to 5 friends...trust me, they'll

appreciate it. Who knows,maybe something good will

happen. If not...tough