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Re: peggy and gail

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In a message dated 7/7/01 5:18:35 AM Pacific Daylight Time,

okieleah@... writes:

<< and gail, you keep on laughing, YOUR TIME WILL BE HERE SOON.....lmao

unless

seth is petite forver...... but like peggy said that is the only way we

survive......... take care all, leah >>

Oh yeah, he will be! I insist on it! LOL Ummmmm, what stunts growth?

Coffee? LOL Little bugger is 41 pounds now. When his weight catches up

with my age I'm going to put my brain in gear and invent a *child mover* LOL

Guess with all the laughing I'm doing with the *I'm fine/bine*, I'll get no

sympathy here. LOL

Gail

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In a message dated 7/7/2001 7:18:39 AM EST, okieleah@... writes:

<< does billy ray respond to

positive reinforcement as the school calls it???? >>

Only occasionally.

Peggy

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In a message dated 7/7/01 8:35:18 AM Eastern Daylight Time,

okieleah@... writes:

<< lolol my friend's daughter is just down syndrome and 15.... she

says that all the time>>>>> mom will say " tasha please clean your room or

tasha set the table " tasha replies " no thank you,i fine " her mother gets

sooooooo frustrated as i am sure you do too....i guess we all do....i

remember when ashton was 6,7, and even 8, but nowhere near 100 pds, it was

easy to pick her up and move her to wherever......not no more.....i could

see me with a thrown out back or slipped disc......(donna wasn't this you,

or was it neck/)trying to take care of her......ggexxxxxxx i don't even try

to pick her out now, we just wait it out..... >>

Leah,

Just wanted to respond to this. We work really hard to use positive supports

for Gene at home and ALOT at school to keep him from yelling really loud

" NOs " when asked to do something he doesn't want to do. For him, that often

means just pointing out that after he does xyz, he can go to lunch, or play

computer for 10 minutes or go home, etc. We have positive supports in his

IEP...this loud NO stuff is really the biggest challenge at school for him in

an inclusive situation.

Our district has a 6 week summer autism program. Gene has been in it the past

few years but this year, he moved to the jr. high level. New teacher. I got

a picture of the teacher, did a story about her and Mr. Bill helping Gene

learn, took his schedule board to school and explained to them how to

transition with counting down, etc...and how to use positive reinforcers

interspersed with difficult tasks. I was mildly surprised that the teacher

didn't call me to discuss Gene prior to the first day. My 11 year old son

agreed to stay the afternoon to be of assistance. The teacher assured me

that she knew behavior was communication. The sped asst director told me the

teacher had a copy of his IEP and his behavior support plan.

When I came back, I was appalled to find out that at about 1PM, after gym,

they asked Gene to get up and come and do his writing. ( To begin with he

struggles greatly with writing and cannot yet print his own name without

tracing it). He said " NO " in a normal tone of voice. They persisted and he

got louder. They then physically pulled him off the couch ( he is 5'1 " tall

and weighs about 135). They hauled him toward the desk to write and he sat

down. By then, he was really screaming loud and they said he needed to be

quiet. They took him into a 6x6 foot white walled room with no windows.

They went in with him and shut the door. Drew said he was screaming and

crying. When he finally stopped and they thought he would work, they let him

out and he went back to the couch. They took him in the room three times

altogether, actually carrying him by the ankles and wrist at one point

according to my son. ( They denied that ), but he did have black adn blue

marks on the under side of his upper arm that night.

I didn't send him back once she showed me the room they had put him in. She

said, " well, he was really loud and disruptive " . When I met with this

teacher later, she said she has found these behavior modification techniques

to be very effective. She was surprised how smart Gene was....he had really

caught on to this fast adn for many kids with autism it takes week. My

interpretation of that was " He is really smart because he figured out fast

that if he doesn't do his work we will torture him again " . So, he is NOT

going to this program this summer. I still cannot fathom how anyone can be

so cruel....yet she didn't even think she did anything wrong.

I think there are so many strategies to avoid outbursts...this strategy of

punishment and rewards is really archaic I should think...but it scared me

that this actually was taking place in my own school district. Really sad...

Lauri

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In a message dated 7/7/2001 9:06:25 PM EST, timothytlstein@... writes:

<< I think there are so many strategies to avoid outbursts...this strategy of

punishment and rewards is really archaic I should think...but it scared me

that this actually was taking place in my own school district. Really sad...

Lauri >>

Lauri: The sadness part to me is that because I hired staff who had worked

at the treatment center, a behavioral therapist who had clients there and

dealt with the school the kids went to and now a classroom aide to do summer

caregiving I have heard horrors stories from every setting. It goes on all

the time and we never know it. The aide who is here this summer related

that the teacher was refusing to allow Ray to set in a special chair

and just agitated him so she went to the office to complain because she

didn't think Ray could understand what he needed to do to be " level 1 "

to sit in that chair and she thought the teacher was being mean to BR. That

is probably the mildest of the horrors. No matter how much I try to stay on

top of it, I find out these things.

Peggy

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In a message dated 7/7/01 7:06:27 PM Pacific Daylight Time,

timothytlstein@... writes:

<< When I came back, I was appalled to find out that at about 1PM, after

gym,

they asked Gene to get up and come and do his writing. ( To begin with he

struggles greatly with writing and cannot yet print his own name without

tracing it). He said " NO " in a normal tone of voice. They persisted and he

got louder. They then physically pulled him off the couch ( he is 5'1 " tall

and weighs about 135). They hauled him toward the desk to write and he sat

down. By then, he was really screaming loud and they said he needed to be

quiet. They took him into a 6x6 foot white walled room with no windows.

They went in with him and shut the door. Drew said he was screaming and

crying. When he finally stopped and they thought he would work, they let

him

out and he went back to the couch. They took him in the room three times

altogether, actually carrying him by the ankles and wrist at one point

according to my son. ( They denied that ), but he did have black adn blue

marks on the under side of his upper arm that night.

>>

Laurie,

That is awful!!!!!!!! I'm so sorry you ALL had to endure that. That must

have been very scary for your 11 year old to witness too. What happened to

following his IEP??? So what will Gene do all summer now? (((((HUGS)))))

Gail

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In a message dated 7/7/01 11:11:18 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

smilinggail@... writes:

<< That must

have been very scary for your 11 year old to witness too. What happened to

following his IEP??? So what will Gene do all summer now? (((((HUGS)))))

Gail

>>

Gail,

Thanks for your note. According to my 11 year old Drew he wasn't scared, but

angry ( must get that from Mom, hee hee ). You're right, what did happen to

the IEP? They were totally unprepared for him, but I think they felt they

could handle anything with there one intervention fits all approach. Gene

just got back from a great week at camp. He slept out at night, actually

trotted on a horse on a trail, and loved canoeing with his counselor. Now,

the rest of the summer lies before us and I am hoping to find things to fill

his days other than video watching. This is a challenge...but at least he

will be happier than returning to that classroom and I will be much less

stressed out.

Lauri

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In a message dated 7/7/01 10:06:23 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

timothytlstein@... writes:

> down. By then, he was really screaming loud and they said he needed to be

> quiet. They took him into a 6x6 foot white walled room with no windows.

> They went in with him and shut the door. Drew said he was screaming and

> crying. When he finally stopped and they thought he would work, they let

> him

> out and he went back to the couch. They took him in the room three times

> altogether, actually carrying him by the ankles and wrist at one point

> according to my son. ( They denied that ), but he did have black adn blue

> marks on the under side of his upper arm that night.

>

Oh Lauri!!!!! This just breaks my heart!!! It is truly my worst fear; that

someone will mistreat and abuse Maddie. She is non-verbal and does not

comprehend any verbal language. I mean....HOW would I know?!?!? I'm so

sorry Gene had to go through that and I'm so sorry for you as his mom.

Donna

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In a message dated 7/7/01 8:19:00 AM Eastern Daylight Time,

okieleah@... writes:

> ..(donna wasn't this you,

> or was it neck/)trying to take care of her......

Yup. A ruptured disc, what the neuro doc called a blow out; a broken neck.

I had to have emergency spinal fusion surgery. They put a cadaver bone in

my back. n (my 15 yo) thought that was the best. He went around

making jokes like... " My Mom has a stiff's neck " .....LOL

I'm healed, but I'll tell ya, I'm so cautious now. Every once in a while,

it acts up and boy oh boy, I lay myself down right away.

Donna

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how completely awful!!! talk about the dark ages, that is redicuoulas and

his brother, i think i would check into sueing the school or something for

trauma and abuse to gene and his brother. Or something anyways. shawna.

Re: peggy and gail

> In a message dated 7/7/01 7:06:27 PM Pacific Daylight Time,

> timothytlstein@... writes:

>

> << When I came back, I was appalled to find out that at about 1PM, after

> gym,

> they asked Gene to get up and come and do his writing. ( To begin with he

> struggles greatly with writing and cannot yet print his own name without

> tracing it). He said " NO " in a normal tone of voice. They persisted and

he

> got louder. They then physically pulled him off the couch ( he is 5'1 "

tall

> and weighs about 135). They hauled him toward the desk to write and he

sat

> down. By then, he was really screaming loud and they said he needed to

be

> quiet. They took him into a 6x6 foot white walled room with no windows.

> They went in with him and shut the door. Drew said he was screaming and

> crying. When he finally stopped and they thought he would work, they let

> him

> out and he went back to the couch. They took him in the room three

times

> altogether, actually carrying him by the ankles and wrist at one point

> according to my son. ( They denied that ), but he did have black adn blue

> marks on the under side of his upper arm that night.

> >>

>

> Laurie,

> That is awful!!!!!!!! I'm so sorry you ALL had to endure that. That

must

> have been very scary for your 11 year old to witness too. What happened

to

> following his IEP??? So what will Gene do all summer now? (((((HUGS)))))

> Gail

>

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In a message dated 7/8/01 7:16:21 AM Pacific Daylight Time,

timothytlstein@... writes:

<< Gail,

Thanks for your note. According to my 11 year old Drew he wasn't scared,

but

angry ( must get that from Mom, hee hee ). You're right, what did happen to

the IEP? They were totally unprepared for him, but I think they felt they

could handle anything with there one intervention fits all approach. Gene

just got back from a great week at camp. He slept out at night, actually

trotted on a horse on a trail, and loved canoeing with his counselor. Now,

the rest of the summer lies before us and I am hoping to find things to fill

his days other than video watching. This is a challenge...but at least he

will be happier than returning to that classroom and I will be much less

stressed out.

Lauri >>

Laurie,

That's great about camp! Yep, I'm keeping Seth home this summer and it is a

challenge to keep them busy and away from those videos! LOL Good luck and

let us know what wonderful ideas you come up with okay?

Gail

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