Re: AAAHHHH

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 5/15/01 8:58:15 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

stolzfamily@... writes:

<< And the note home today is that he was in time out for refusing to write

his number " correctly " , and missed recess for something he did walking

into the building first thing in the morning. I just cant' think I'm too

mad at both the school and Matt. He has a behavior plan, that calls for

time out for " violent " type behavior, and at that, for 1-2 minutes.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

>>

Aww. . (((((hugs))))) No wonder Matt came home and acted out like that!

Poor kid. I'm sure you're not to sympathetic right now, but ....poor kid.

:-( What on earth are these *educators* doing? Wish I had a secret

potion to send you to get all the stains out. I'm sorry. Lots of prayers.

Gail

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 5/15/01 9:18:02 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

jmedlen@... writes:

<< Sounds to me like Matt is putting YOU in time out because of their

abominable behavior at school. I've started pointing out how events at

school show up at home--when they miss the mark with communication, I pay

for it later. Tonight, for instance, I'm sporting a deep, bloody gash to my

face thanks to some decisions that created an incredibly over-hungry child.

>>

Gosh Joan! Sorry and prayers go for you and Andy too. Do you think maybe

educating the educators isn't going so well for all these kids? Sure seems

like the schools are making life pretty rough for everyone. How long is it

going to take before the teachers learn? This is very depressing. These

highs and lows with the kids are a killer at times. God help me, because I

will never make it the amount of years all of you have been dealing with

these problems. There has to be a better way to live. I don't want Seth to

get one day older! I hope the school situation today with Andy wasn't

serious. (((((hugs)))))

Gail

Never doubt the power of a small group of committed people to change the

world. That's about the only way it has ever happened in the past.

Margaret Mead (1901 - 1978) Anthropologist

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 5/15/01 9:54:51 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

jmedlen@... writes:

<< but the kids holds it all together until

he sees MOM (the comfort person) and then *I* get all the nasty stuff.

>>

Okay Joan....I ahve the same questions I always read! LOL Ear infection?

Sore throat? Any other possible reason for his aggression? *I* would

think, that if he doesn't dump his tray everyday, there must be something

wrong somewhere for him to do it today. AND, if his way of saying *leave me

alone* is to run away, then that doesn't answer the question of why he was

dumping his tray. I know I have the motivation to learn about behaviors

like this, but I also know I am not real swift either. So if I can learn,

why on earth can't these educators learn? Or is it they don't want to

learn? Either way, it sure isn't helping the kids any. Or for that matter,

the parents either!

Gail

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

OH MY GOD!! I am thankful for my day. I was upset that Zeb was too lazy to

come upstairs from the playroom to go to the bathroom and peed all over his

video tapes that were lined up on the rug.I was washing video tapes and

scrubbing the carpeting.I still stinks like urine but better than

shoepolish.Can you dye carpeting? If Zeb missed recess over not writing a

number correctly the school would have to call in the swat team.Isn't that

rather harsh?

Charlyne

[Guest guest]

Hi Joan,

I do know if Zeb's behavior is impossible at home something is going on at

school.I send in pretzels for snack most of the time and one night last week

caught the husband finishing the last of my last bag.I told Zeb I could stop

at the store on the way to school or would he like chips.He was okay with the

chips and went into school fine. The school called at snack time and Zeb was

sobbing because he didn't have his pretzels.They tried to give him pretzels

but he wouldn't stop crying.I was called to school and asked to bring the

pretzels but he just needed to see me.He never cries so I knew something had

happened in school. I am grateful that Zeb has speech but he can't always

explain what is wrong. If a teacher or had does something he is confused if

it is right or wrong.I usually have to figure it out myself.

Charlyne

[Guest guest]

Hi Joan,

I don't have the hunger type issues with because he is tube-fed.

BUT, I am the recipient of his angry behavior when he's upset about anything!

We've been interviewing new Respite workers this past week and I guess he's

had his fill. On Saturday, I was showing a potential worker how I do

something with and he started pinching my arm. I was calmly telling

him to LET GO when he clamped onto my arm with his teeth. He would not let

go and I thought for sure he would tear a big chunk out of my arm. Then, he

just all of a sudden let go and I have a nice big bruise on my arm! It was

the same kind of thing when I was working and I would come home. He was mad

at me for being gone. On the one hand, he's glad to see me; on the other,

he'd head-butt me or scratch or bite. I understand what he's trying to

say....but that sure doesn't make it hurt less!

Terry

[Guest guest]

Matt just dumped an entire bottle of BLACK nail polish all over my

daughter's room, some pictures on her desk, the floor, his legs, arms,

feet, and hands. Then poured a bottle of nail polish remover all over the

floor-it doens't help. The polish is not coming up off of the berber

carpet, the remover has soaked into the rug. Hubby is going to kill us

all! I am too upset to even look at him. I gave him a bath, but it just

got all over the tub (Came out) and the wall (Didnt' come out). I had to

bathe him in remover!

And the note home today is that he was in time out for refusing to write

his number " correctly " , and missed recess for something he did walking

into the building first thing in the morning. I just cant' think I'm too

mad at both the school and Matt. He has a behavior plan, that calls for

time out for " violent " type behavior, and at that, for 1-2 minutes.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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[Guest guest]

At 05:53 PM 5/15/01 -0700, you wrote:

>And the note home today is that he was in time out for refusing to write

>his number " correctly " , and missed recess for something he did walking

>into the building first thing in the morning. I just cant' think I'm too

>mad at both the school and Matt. He has a behavior plan, that calls for

>time out for " violent " type behavior, and at that, for 1-2 minutes.

>AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Sounds to me like Matt is putting YOU in time out because of their

abominable behavior at school. I've started pointing out how events at

school show up at home--when they miss the mark with communication, I pay

for it later. Tonight, for instance, I'm sporting a deep, bloody gash to my

face thanks to some decisions that created an incredibly over-hungry child.

mary...I'm sooooo sorry about the rug, the walls, the bathtub, the

furniture---wherever things went. Sooo sorry. I hope your husband is more

benevolent than you think he will be.

HUGE hugs,

j

[Guest guest]

At 09:46 PM 5/15/01 EDT, you wrote:

I don't want Seth to

>get one day older! I hope the school situation today with Andy wasn't

>serious. (((((hugs)))))

Yes, I'd go back to age 5 quite willingly.

The thing is, the problems aren't huge, but they add up. Goes like this. He

didn't get to bed on time (don't ask), so I took him to school late (didn't

want to send a grumpy kid when we're all looking at behavior so closely).

He had a small breakfast. He didn't eat a snack (that's OK), but at lunch,

the sheet says he kept dumping his tray. Now what was *that* all about? Of

course teh EA thinks it's the obvious message (get away from me) when it's

probably something much different like he didn't like it or where he was

sitting or or or--but rarely is odd behavior like that related to something

so simple. If he wants to get away from someone he runs away. Anyway, so

then he had a " small snack. " Since I SEND the snacks, I know what they

are--not enough calories or nutrition to cover a kid. If you add all that

up, you figure that he *maybe* had about 500 calories when he usually has

around 1000 by this time. No wonder he was hungry?! His meds increase

appetite...studies (many studies) show that blood sugar drops/hunger will

increase aggressive behavior......but the kids holds it all together until

he sees MOM (the comfort person) and then *I* get all the nasty stuff.

Anyone else have issues like that?

j

[Guest guest]

I went to the school today to ask for an IEP meeting, and the resource

room teacher was " offended " . I told her that Matt is very angry when he

gets home, and is acting out. I just want to sit with the entire team and

figure out stategies to help him. She asked how I knew he was angry at

things that are going on at school, and how did we know that it isnt'

home that he is angry about! Well, let's see. He has been with us all his

life, and on the weekends, he is fine, but during the week, we have lots

of acting out stuff to deal with. He requests to stay home every day. And

the problem would be........??????

She tried to get me angry by saying that maybe the academic program was

too rigorous and perhaps we need to cut back on those things. I agreed,

that perhaps we do. My at home is " capable " of doing Pre-Algebra

stuff, but gets frustrated doing it and it takes her forever. She is not

" ready " . So the teacher offered to cut back. I said no, not yet, after we

all sit down at a meeting and decide together, with the help of the

behaviorial support team. She didnt' like that, but that is ok.

She offered to let me come in and watch what they do, but that is not the

point. Anyone would stop what they were doing wrong when someone is

watching them! Come on! How stupid do they think I am??? We need the

extra eyes and ears there.

She wanted to do the full scale IEP for next year. (We are in year round

school, not due until July, I think) I said fine, as long as we had the

next year teacher and resource room teacher there. Since they say they

dont' know what school he will be at yet, they cant' do that.

Then she tried to say that she has been asking for more things for a

lower-IQ level population, rather than a resource room population. I

said, " OK< then we need to put what he needs in his IEP " . But, she had an

answer to that one too. That would required her to go through catalogues

and pick out the stuff she needs. I guess they all just want the state to

turn over great blocks of money, to spend at will. In some instances,

great. But in general, I know they (the classroom teachers, at least

here) have a certain dollar amount of money to spend for the classroom.

What ever they dont' spend, goes back to the district. They have a

certain date by which to spend it. Around that date, you will see lots of

classroom teachers in the teacher supply stores, making sure they spend

their money. It is not " Well, let's see, I know we will be working on

money problems, so I need some plastic money " It is " If I dont' use this

money, it will go away. So let's spend it. Let's see. Maybe we will do

money sometime, so I'll get some of that " . I've seen and heard it myself.

(As I am in the store getting things that I NEED to teach my own kids at

home. I decide what we will be covering, what we need, then shop around

to see what prices I can get, to save as much money as possible. )

Anyway, resource room teacher doenst' want to go throught the catalogues

to see what Matt needs. She jsut wants to get " Stuff " and have have him

" need " the stuff she has gotten. I have supplied lots of the stuff for

him-puzzles, camera for picture schedules (which were never implemented)

etc...

Thanks for letting me vent, guys. You are the greatest

________________________________________________________________

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[Guest guest]

:

first of all, GOOD GIRL!! And yes, stick to your guns about having more

than just her sit down with you. I always just ask for a team meeting

rather than using the words IEP review--even though it's the same thing. It

sort of takes the legal sting out of it for them. But don't meet without

some people you trust regarding behavior there.

A couple of hints:

1) Keep sort of a journal about what Matt's behavior is like after school

and on weekends. It can be as specific or general as you want, but what you

want to do is track the difference in his behavior on weekends vs. school

days.

2) In your journal, make note of what information comes home from school

(for instance the time out business and lack of recess). Also keep note of

how busy a weekend day is. For instance, on Saturday, Andy goes grocery

shopping, comes home for lunch, then we take to the library to work

and we look for books, we go home, then we go to my parents to visit, we go

home, then we often do something else, then dinner. Doesn't sound " laid

back " to me.

3) Maybe rather than lowering the academic bar, the teacher could look at

how she structures his time. Does he get breaks to deal with sensory needs??

4) don't allow the teacher to make changes without the group. Matt needs to

learn. She doesn't get to take that opportunity away from him b/c it's

easy. She needs to recognize that not writing his letters well is not

" aggressive behavior " that require time out. duh.

5) When she starts talking about things for Matt (and the class) and

needing to buy them, list off all the things you hav provided that she

already has access to and could be implementing. she sounds like a whiner

to me.

Anyway.

I just want to commend you for taking action, sticking to your guns, not

getting upset even though she'd like that (then she can paint you as an

emotional mother), and knowing what's right for Matt.

Way to go.

j

[Guest guest]

Well Joan and ,

I've had plenty of that dumping on me by my older son. When he used to be

teased at school, or not be allowed to play on a team he was on etc, he would

come home very upset and I would have to deal with a miserable, very unhappy

child. After he dumped all of his anger on me, he felt better, but I always

felt worse. It seemed to be my job to take his pain away from him. So sorry

both of you had such miserable experiences. Brook doesn't seem to do this,

his teacher is pretty reasonable and understanding. I wish we could all have

that for our kids all the time.

Marisa,

Mom to Miles 14, Brook 11, and Genevieve 3 yrs

[Guest guest]

a big virtual hug for you!! i know how you feel nathan

likes to pour or all of a sudden wreck or break

things, i dont think its on purpose, but we get just a

mad too!! I think its like when young boys break many

of their toys or take them apart, they call it a

scientific phase, learning about their surroundings

and how they work what happens to the toy or to me if

i do this, etc. As fo rthe school that doesnt seem

right. i know nathan has a behavior plan too, but he

doesnt get time out for refusing to to something

correctly, he would never get anything done,lol. And

he never misses recess as a punishment, he often

doesnt like recess but lately he has been very active

for this. earns time on his computer at school

to play game of his choice, he is a computer nut!!!!,

and if he is refusing they just remeind him if you

want ....then ...... sometimes even letting him sit

there a few minutes ignoring him and he will start

working on his own. He also gets to fill the pop

machine as part of his SI, and he gets a pop reward

too, this is also a fav. shawna.

--- J Stolz <stolzfamily@...> wrote:

> Matt just dumped an entire bottle of BLACK nail

> polish all over my

> daughter's room, some pictures on her desk, the

> floor, his legs, arms,

> feet, and hands. Then poured a bottle of nail polish

> remover all over the

> floor-it doens't help. The polish is not coming up

> off of the berber

> carpet, the remover has soaked into the rug. Hubby

> is going to kill us

> all! I am too upset to even look at him. I gave him

> a bath, but it just

> got all over the tub (Came out) and the wall (Didnt'

> come out). I had to

> bathe him in remover!

>

> And the note home today is that he was in time out

> for refusing to write

> his number " correctly " , and missed recess for

> something he did walking

> into the building first thing in the morning. I just

> cant' think I'm too

> mad at both the school and Matt. He has a behavior

> plan, that calls for

> time out for " violent " type behavior, and at that,

> for 1-2 minutes.

> AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

>

>

>

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> less!

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[Guest guest]

a,

Thanks. I think we all need to sit down and have a POSITIVE plan, no more

negative stuff. I like the idea of earning time doing things, but not

taking away stuff. I know they will say " OK, you have to " earn " your

recess. NOT! this is not what I am talking about. I do think we need to

put much more SI stuff in there. At home, one of the best " rewards " is a

large " tickle/wrestle " session. Mostly wrestle. I cant' do it, I have

mostly have my almost 16 year old son do it. Anyone else gets really

hurt! He needs this.

tonight, he destroyed a plaster volcano that above mentioned son just

completed on Tuesday-a homeschool art class project 7 weeks in the

making. The first thing he has actually finished all the way, and 1 day

later, Matt threw it repeatedly to smash it. Of course, Dan was playing

outside with him and left him out there alone, knowing what could happen,

so while I feel bad, I dont' feel THAT bad. I'll get more plaster and let

him do another!

I also think we need to separate the writing of the numbers for Math from

the doing of the math problems. We do this for reading. He circles the

correct answer on the worksheets, or points to prove he understands stuff

he has read, but for math, because they are working on writing the

numbers, they want him to write. I want him to write too, but I think his

fine motor skills are so far behind his ability to understand and work

the problems, that this could be frustrating for him.

I'll keep you informed of what we decide

On Wed, 16 May 2001 19:38:11 -0700 (PDT) Green a

<mashawnag@...> writes:

> a big virtual hug for you!! i know how you feel nathan

> likes to pour or all of a sudden wreck or break

> things, i dont think its on purpose, but we get just a

> mad too!! I think its like when young boys break many

> of their toys or take them apart, they call it a

> scientific phase, learning about their surroundings

> and how they work what happens to the toy or to me if

> i do this, etc. As fo rthe school that doesnt seem

> right. i know nathan has a behavior plan too, but he

> doesnt get time out for refusing to to something

> correctly, he would never get anything done,lol. And

> he never misses recess as a punishment, he often

> doesnt like recess but lately he has been very active

> for this. earns time on his computer at school

> to play game of his choice, he is a computer nut!!!!,

> and if he is refusing they just remeind him if you

> want ....then ...... sometimes even letting him sit

> there a few minutes ignoring him and he will start

> working on his own. He also gets to fill the pop

> machine as part of his SI, and he gets a pop reward

> too, this is also a fav. shawna.

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[Guest guest]

In a message dated 5/16/01 2:51:30 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

stolzfamily@... writes:

<< She offered to let me come in and watch what they do, but that is not the

point. Anyone would stop what they were doing wrong when someone is

watching them! Come on! How stupid do they think I am??? >>

,

I personally think going in and watching is a good idea. You may be

surprised at what they are doing....they may not realize that what they are

doing is inappropiate...but you will see it right away. Maybe going in a few

days would be even better...when they get comfortable with you there, other

things may pop up. This has been my personal experience. I went in and

immediately saw where all the behavior at home was coming from. Lots of

power struggles going on over very little. Just my opinion.

Lauri

[Guest guest]

At 08:26 PM 5/16/01 -0700, you wrote:

>I also think we need to separate the writing of the numbers for Math from

>the doing of the math problems. We do this for reading. He circles the

>correct answer on the worksheets, or points to prove he understands stuff

>he has read, but for math, because they are working on writing the

>numbers, they want him to write. I want him to write too, but I think his

>fine motor skills are so far behind his ability to understand and work

>the problems, that this could be frustrating for him.

Yes!

Even with folks who are fairly accomplished who have DS this is a good

idea. When you're learning to *write*, you should focus only on the

writing. When you're learning to read or compute, that's the focus.

I have this thing I do with families when they come for counseling: we make

a list of everyone's favorite foods. Usually the Mom and the personw ith DS

come to my house. I get out all the felt pens (big box) and have the person

with DS choose one for each family member, and then one to represent the

family as a group. Then he chooses HIS color. Then I take the pen and

" interview " him so he'll tell me his favorite foods for the different food

gropus (with Mom watching). We write everything down. Next he interviews

MOM and I am the recorder writing down her fav food in the color he chooses

for her. Their homework is to go home and do htis with the rest of the

family. Mom is the recorder. Then together they recopy the list (person

with DS can write now) and underline foods that are liked by more than one

person. From this list they will make menus.

But I never have the person with DS do the writing except at the copying

phase--no matter how accomplished for two reasons: 1) I want them to

concentrate on the communication skills to get the list made and 2) I want

them to concentrate on categorizing the foods by food group and really pay

attention to what other people like.

It works well.

j

[Guest guest]

Dear ,

I agree go in and visit. You would be amazed at what they think is the

correct way or appropriate way to respond or teach etc. We had a terrible

teacher once and I spoke with a gentleman from the Compliance Complaint

Division of the state of Calif. He came out to my home to talk to me about

problems that we were having with the teacher and the school. He told me

that bad teachers are very easy to see as they cannot correct their behavior

even in front of others. I was very surprised to hear this. But he assured me

that it was true. They don't know how to handle things correctly and can't

change just because they are being observed. I'm sure there are exceptions to

this, but I would definitely go in and see what was going on. Go in at

different times of the day, look at what the aides are doing, look at

transitions, at recess at lunch, etc.

When Brook was about 6 years old his terrible teacher was trying to get

him to do a puzzle which he had absolutely no interest in. He tossed the

puzzle piece, the wood kind with a handle, off to the side. He clearly was

just trying to get rid of it since he didn't know what to do with it and

didn't care about the task.

Anyway I observed his teacher tell the aide to put him in time out for

this. We also had a policy that he was only to go in time out for aggressive

behavior. She had no idea of what his abilities were. She thought he could

read books, etc., when in reality he paid absolutely no attention to books.

So at the parent back to school night. She used Brook as an example of the

child that could read a book and then get to put a star up on the board. She

was so clueless it was amazing and extremely frustrating. She also would lose

her temper and yell at the kids etc. She used to come to school dressed up in

fancy clothes and shoes and a hat! Anyway she was really a nightmare, I

won't go into the rest of it. But everyone witnessed her inappropriate

behavior repeatedly. The principal got her a mentor and all kinds of help,

but nothing helped.

Marisa,

Mom to Miles 14, Brook 11, and Genevieve 3 yrs

[Guest guest]

i love your food idea,lol, im sure nathan would

too,food items are them main words nathan knows how to

say and sign,lol, and he always wants soem form or

another of it,lol. I agrre too, the areas need to be

focused. when nathan does his reading thats what he

does, and math is done with a peg board and/or other

types of things, like his pop machine loading. And

when he does his handwriting that is all he works on,

all theyve been working on is writing his name, still

cant, but can read it anywhere and spell it to

verbally or with rubber stamps. When he does his

worksheets, he either does some on the computer or he

usues rubber stamps of letters or numbers, the only

writing in this area may be coloring, very hard for

him, and circling or crossing off things that match.

shawna.

--- Joan <jmedlen@...> wrote:

> At 08:26 PM 5/16/01 -0700, you wrote:

> >I also think we need to separate the writing of the

> numbers for Math from

> >the doing of the math problems. We do this for

> reading. He circles the

> >correct answer on the worksheets, or points to

> prove he understands stuff

> >he has read, but for math, because they are working

> on writing the

> >numbers, they want him to write. I want him to

> write too, but I think his

> >fine motor skills are so far behind his ability to

> understand and work

> >the problems, that this could be frustrating for

> him.

>

> Yes!

> Even with folks who are fairly accomplished who have

> DS this is a good

> idea. When you're learning to *write*, you should

> focus only on the

> writing. When you're learning to read or compute,

> that's the focus.

>

> I have this thing I do with families when they come

> for counseling: we make

> a list of everyone's favorite foods. Usually the Mom

> and the personw ith DS

> come to my house. I get out all the felt pens (big

> box) and have the person

> with DS choose one for each family member, and then

> one to represent the

> family as a group. Then he chooses HIS color. Then I

> take the pen and

> " interview " him so he'll tell me his favorite foods

> for the different food

> gropus (with Mom watching). We write everything

> down. Next he interviews

> MOM and I am the recorder writing down her fav food

> in the color he chooses

> for her. Their homework is to go home and do htis

> with the rest of the

> family. Mom is the recorder. Then together they

> recopy the list (person

> with DS can write now) and underline foods that are

> liked by more than one

> person. From this list they will make menus.

>

> But I never have the person with DS do the writing

> except at the copying

> phase--no matter how accomplished for two reasons:

> 1) I want them to

> concentrate on the communication skills to get the

> list made and 2) I want

> them to concentrate on categorizing the foods by

> food group and really pay

> attention to what other people like.

>

> It works well.

>

> j

>

> --------------------------------------------------

> Checkout our homepage for information,

> bookmarks, and photos of our kids. Share favorite

> bookmarks, ideas, and other information by including

> them. Don't forget, messages are a permanent record

> of the archives for our list.

>

> --------------------------------------------

>

>

[Guest guest]

they should never take anything away, especially

recess its one of the major peer social events of the

school day. shawna.

--- J Stolz <stolzfamily@...> wrote:

> a,

> Thanks. I think we all need to sit down and have a

> POSITIVE plan, no more

> negative stuff. I like the idea of earning time

> doing things, but not

> taking away stuff. I know they will say " OK, you

> have to " earn " your

> recess. NOT! this is not what I am talking about. I

> do think we need to

> put much more SI stuff in there. At home, one of the

> best " rewards " is a

> large " tickle/wrestle " session. Mostly wrestle. I

> cant' do it, I have

> mostly have my almost 16 year old son do it. Anyone

> else gets really

> hurt! He needs this.

> tonight, he destroyed a plaster volcano that above

> mentioned son just

> completed on Tuesday-a homeschool art class project

> 7 weeks in the

> making. The first thing he has actually finished all

> the way, and 1 day

> later, Matt threw it repeatedly to smash it. Of

> course, Dan was playing

> outside with him and left him out there alone,

> knowing what could happen,

> so while I feel bad, I dont' feel THAT bad. I'll get

> more plaster and let

> him do another!

>

> I also think we need to separate the writing of the

> numbers for Math from

> the doing of the math problems. We do this for

> reading. He circles the

> correct answer on the worksheets, or points to prove

> he understands stuff

> he has read, but for math, because they are working

> on writing the

> numbers, they want him to write. I want him to write

> too, but I think his

> fine motor skills are so far behind his ability to

> understand and work

> the problems, that this could be frustrating for

> him.

>

> I'll keep you informed of what we decide

>

>

>

>

> On Wed, 16 May 2001 19:38:11 -0700 (PDT) Green

> a

> <mashawnag@...> writes:

> > a big virtual hug for you!! i know how you feel

> nathan

> > likes to pour or all of a sudden wreck or break

> > things, i dont think its on purpose, but we get

> just a

> > mad too!! I think its like when young boys break

> many

> > of their toys or take them apart, they call it a

> > scientific phase, learning about their

> surroundings

> > and how they work what happens to the toy or to me

> if

> > i do this, etc. As fo rthe school that doesnt seem

> > right. i know nathan has a behavior plan too, but

> he

> > doesnt get time out for refusing to to something

> > correctly, he would never get anything done,lol.

> And

> > he never misses recess as a punishment, he often

> > doesnt like recess but lately he has been very

> active

> > for this. earns time on his computer at

> school

> > to play game of his choice, he is a computer

> nut!!!!,

> > and if he is refusing they just remeind him if you

> > want ....then ...... sometimes even letting him

> sit

> > there a few minutes ignoring him and he will start

> > working on his own. He also gets to fill the pop

> > machine as part of his SI, and he gets a pop

> reward

> > too, this is also a fav. shawna.

>

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[Guest guest]

In a message dated 5/17/01 5:29:31 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

r.mark.miedema@... writes:

<< I hope you turned to the secretary of the team meeting and asked that the

principal's remark was documented in the record. Then I'd ask them to add

the parent response. " Your threat of retaliation against my child is duly

noted. Also be know that if my child's recess privileges are abused, I will

be filing an administrative action and will discuss a discrimination suit

with

my attorney. I'd also like a copy of this meetings minutes to take with me

before I leave today. Thank you. "

I don't know about your district, but in ours you'd find a VERY different

attitude, real quick.

>>

LOL Filed and saved for future use!!!!! LOL

Gail

[Guest guest]

a,

I agree, however I have already had the principal tell me, in a team

meeting, that " recess is not mandatory. *I* am the one who grants any

child here recess, and *I* can take it away at any time, with or without

your permission! " .

So we will have an uphill battle. Next year, I am going to have written

into his IEP that Recess is necessary. Even if it is just him outside,

playing on the equipment (which is the only way he gets on it anyway, if

everyone else is off of it), he needs that time.

On Thu, 17 May 2001 12:01:57 -0700 (PDT) Green a

<mashawnag@...> writes:

> they should never take anything away, especially

> recess its one of the major peer social events of the

> school day. shawna.

> --- J Stolz <stolzfamily@...> wrote:

> > a,

________________________________________________________________

GET INTERNET ACCESS FROM JUNO!

Juno offers FREE or PREMIUM Internet access for less!

Join Juno today! For your FREE software, visit:

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[Guest guest]

I hope you turned to the secretary of the team meeting and asked that the

principal's remark was documented in the record. Then I'd ask them to add

the parent response. " Your threat of retaliation against my child is duly

noted. Also be know that if my child's recess privileges are abused, I will

be filing an administrative action and will discuss a discrimination suit with

my attorney. I'd also like a copy of this meetings minutes to take with me

before I leave today. Thank you. "

I don't know about your district, but in ours you'd find a VERY different

attitude, real quick.

>>> stolzfamily@... 05/17/01 12:16PM >>>

a,

I agree, however I have already had the principal tell me, in a team

meeting, that " recess is not mandatory. *I* am the one who grants any

child here recess, and *I* can take it away at any time, with or without

your permission! " .

So we will have an uphill battle. Next year, I am going to have written

into his IEP that Recess is necessary. Even if it is just him outside,

playing on the equipment (which is the only way he gets on it anyway, if

everyone else is off of it), he needs that time.

[Guest guest]

what a jerk, i read in nathans notebook yesterday he

only got 5min of his recess cause he didnt start

working until the bell rang and finished up with only

5min to paly, this has never been an issue for us, i

hope when i talk to principle that it wont be a thing,

it never was before, maybe its been too long a year

for his aid, hmmm. shawna.

--- J Stolz <stolzfamily@...> wrote:

> a,

> I agree, however I have already had the principal

> tell me, in a team

> meeting, that " recess is not mandatory. *I* am the

> one who grants any

> child here recess, and *I* can take it away at any

> time, with or without

> your permission! " .

>

> So we will have an uphill battle. Next year, I am

> going to have written

> into his IEP that Recess is necessary. Even if it is

> just him outside,

> playing on the equipment (which is the only way he

> gets on it anyway, if

> everyone else is off of it), he needs that time.

>

>

>

>

>

> On Thu, 17 May 2001 12:01:57 -0700 (PDT) Green

> a

> <mashawnag@...> writes:

> > they should never take anything away, especially

> > recess its one of the major peer social events of

> the

> > school day. shawna.

> > --- J Stolz <stolzfamily@...> wrote:

> > > a,

>

________________________________________________________________

> GET INTERNET ACCESS FROM JUNO!

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> less!

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>

> --------------------------------------------------

> Checkout our homepage for information,

> bookmarks, and photos of our kids. Share favorite

> bookmarks, ideas, and other information by including

> them. Don't forget, messages are a permanent record

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>

> --------------------------------------------

>

>

[Guest guest]

--- Joan <jmedlen@...> wrote:

> At 09:46 PM 5/15/01 EDT, you wrote:

....studies (many studies) show that blood

> sugar drops/hunger will

> increase aggressive behavior......but the kids holds

> it all together until

> he sees MOM (the comfort person) and then *I* get

> all the nasty stuff.

>

> Anyone else have issues like that?

>

> j

Gosh, Joan

sorry for the late post, I have been so busy I could

not get to the computer the last couple of days...

This is the story of our life with . They would

tell us that they were giving the class a snack every

day, we were even required to send $ every week, or a

snack for every kid in the class once a week. Only to

find out they were not getting the snack!!? But

everyone constantly complained about 's bad or

explosive behavior. Last year his teacher swore she

could set the clock at 11:05 by his behavior. Or else

he had explosions which usually involved the olympic

sport of furniture throwing. It took us until this

past October to discover he is hypoglycemic. Now we

send in two snacks a day, protein and carb. All they

have to do is sit him down and give it to him. At

least 3 times a week he comes home with at least one

snack. And sometimes notes that he had something else

in its place. Cookies, potatoe chips, a fruit roll

up, and a behavior slip saying he was hitting,

kicking, spitting, etc. Their excuse is they can't

shove the food down his throat, but they don't see

they are undermining his nutrition. All the snacks

they replace his with give a quick sugar high and then

he bottoms out. There is also a direct correlation

between his missed protein and his bus behavior in the

afternoon. Everytime I have to physically remove his

hitting, spitting self from the bus, he has a snack in

his bag. When we get back from vacation next week, I

am planning on finding a way to give the bus driver

and monitor something to give him on the bus. Maybe a

pack of peanut butter crackers. I am so tired of his

teacher and school monitors cluelessness and being

beaten up when he gets home.

Deb>

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 5/18/2001 7:54:05 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

skrapido@... writes:

> ...studies (many studies) show that blood

> > sugar drops/hunger will

> > increase aggressive behavior......but the kids holds

> > it all together until

> > he sees MOM (the comfort person) and then *I* get

> > all the nasty stuff.

> >

> > Anyone else have issues like that?

> >

Hi Joan,

I am often slow at thinking about all this stuff.If you got a dr. note and

had copies given to the school nurse,teachers etc.then put on the IEP that

shouldn't be a problem.I have the opposite problem. They feed my child all

day. He is a human vacuum cleaner and is a little tub.They were giving him

cans of coke for a reward besides.If I turn my back at home he is in the

refrigerator chomping on a lb. on bologna and hiding it in his shirt etc.

Charlyne