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In a message dated 1/29/01 8:54:53 AM Central Standard Time,

okieleah@... writes:

<< i am

on another list and the parents are always complaining about how the

churches have the hardest time accepting and accomadating our

children..whatever happened to the belief that 'we are all God's

children'!!! makes you wonder sometimes about the true sincerity of

people... >>

I have a positive church experience: Our church, Holy Spirit Catholic

Community, is a truly inclusive place. It is a relatively new congregation,

only 2 1/2 years, and we have mass in a public school gym while we're raising

the funds to build our church. Last year our pastor hired a Special Needs

Religious Education Coordinator who has a daughter with special needs, so she

understands the " mom " and " educator " side of things. She started a support

group for moms that meets once per month, and she's working individually with

each family to insure that their children with special needs have whatever

they need to be educated in the church. Many kids are included in the

regular RE classes with a teenager from the confirmation program serving as

their aide (the teens have to do service to be confirmed), while some others

are homeschooled, and a few others go to another church in town that has a

self-contained RE program for children with special needs. is in a

regular RE class, although one year behind her grade in school, with an aide,

and will make her first communion this spring. Our pastor has agreed to use

regular bread or a cracker because won't eat the host. Our pastor

tries so hard to be inclusive of everyone. He encourages us to bring

to mass, even though she can be loud and disruptive at times. He even

preaches about including kids with special needs in play, birthday parties,

etc. and not tolerating unkind remarks like " moron, " " retard, " " gimp, " etc.

I had never heard that from the pulpit before! He frequently reminds us in

his sermons that we are ALL God's and children and that we ALL have something

special to offer the world. He has set the tone and everyone at our church

is very supportive of us and . I just love this guy and never want to

leave this parish. Aren't there more clergymen like him out there in the

world? Just wanted to share a good church story with you all. Thanks for

listening,

Maureen

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At 10:40 AM 1/29/01 EST, you wrote:

Aren't there more clergymen like him out there in the

>world? Just wanted to share a good church story with you all. Thanks for

>listening,

There are. But they can be tough to find.

I've come to the conclusion (warning this may make some people mad) that

many people attend church to feed their own souls rather than to be a

congregation or community who interact outside of the church building or

sunday morning. This makes it very hard for church leaders to challenge

people to rise to a deeper level of commitment and caring for each

other--including our children, the elderly, those who are less fortunate,

and those who are struggling. It's difficult for many to reach out to

others to someone who has *needs* or to a situation that is " messy " ...when

what they want is to be filled themselves. Sometimes it is hard for people

to realize that in doing so, they will receive much more than they gave. It

takes a willing and strong heart.

The leadership of the church is so important. I'm seeing our own

congregation begin to change..and begin to understand why I can't watch.

They are trying to make it so that it doesn't hurt so much to be there...in

otherwords, so that I don't have to feel rejection yet one more time or SEE

it happening to others. It's nice. I don't trust it yet, but it's very nice.

j

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In a message dated 1/29/01 10:37:51 AM Central Standard Time,

jmedlen@... writes:

<< I'm seeing our own

congregation begin to change..and begin to understand why I can't watch.

They are trying to make it so that it doesn't hurt so much to be there...in

otherwords, so that I don't have to feel rejection yet one more time or SEE

it happening to others. It's nice. I don't trust it yet, but it's very nice.

>>

Joan, I'm glad for you that at least things are moving in the right direction.

Maureen

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In a message dated 1/30/01 8:15:38 PM Central Standard Time,

brink_00@... writes:

<< I have noticed that young normal kids like (3 to 6) and speical

kids should have a " bag of things " while their in church service, instead

of having their parents talk about being quiet. >>

Yes, , I agree with you about kids who are too young to really

understand church services having a " bag of things " to keep them occupied and

hopefully quiet. , my daughter with DS-ASD has one and so does my son

, who is a non-disabled child of 6. Very good suggestion!

Maureen

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Whoever wrote about churches,

I have noticed that the special kids arn't treated like they should be

in church. I have noticed that young normal kids like (3 to 6) and speical

kids should have a " bag of things " while their in church service, instead

of having their parents talk about being quiet. Yea I know, not all people

treat all people the same when it comes to church activities. Lucky for me,

I have friends that support me, so I'm not to worried about church

activities that people bother about not treating all the same.

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In a message dated 1/29/01 10:47:19 AM Eastern Standard Time, MRASMUS@...

writes:

<< Our pastor has agreed to use

regular bread or a cracker because won't eat the host. Our pastor

tries so hard to be inclusive of everyone. He encourages us to bring

to mass, even though she can be loud and disruptive at times. He even

preaches about including kids with special needs in play, birthday parties,

etc. and not tolerating unkind remarks like " moron, " " retard, " " gimp, " etc.

I had never heard that from the pulpit before! He frequently reminds us in

his sermons that we are ALL God's and children and that we ALL have

something

special to offer the world. >>

Maureen,

What a great heartwarming story. I am so pleased to hear about a good

church experience. My friend's daughter made her first Holy Communion 2

years ago. CAroline is 12 and has DS, but has autistic tendencies and is

placed in the severe range for MR. She was attending a Catholic Special

Needs school and they were not very open to her receiving communion. Mom

had suggested they put ketchup on the host and then Caroline would eat it.

Well Sister Francis acted like she'd just done the most sacriligious act on

the planet!!! Made me sick!!

Thanks for sharing your upbeat experience with the Catholic church. It gives

me hope.

Donna

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I agree with this too, my 8yr old loves to write etc

during church and nathan usually dangles a string, but

one thing our church does is when we start the sermon

part the kids go to kids church where they get a more

on their level of sermon (short,lol) and color or do a

craft related to sermon stuff, boys love it! shawna.

--- MRASMUS@... wrote:

> In a message dated 1/30/01 8:15:38 PM Central

> Standard Time,

> brink_00@... writes:

>

> << I have noticed that young normal kids like (3 to

> 6) and speical

> kids should have a " bag of things " while their in

> church service, instead

> of having their parents talk about being quiet.

> >>

>

> Yes, , I agree with you about kids who are

> too young to really

> understand church services having a " bag of things "

> to keep them occupied and

> hopefully quiet. , my daughter with DS-ASD

> has one and so does my son

> , who is a non-disabled child of 6. Very good

> suggestion!

>

> Maureen

>

>

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Thanks for y'all to agree with my " bag of things to do " for younger kids,

and kids that can't seem to sit still during a church service. I remember

that I used to doodle on my paper and draw stuff while I was in church

service, but then I don't know what happened, now I'm into listing to church

services.

From,

Oh yea the 12 hours of babysitting of this weekend went great. Now I'm

babysatt out, and finally a night to relax, after the past few nights I've

been getting home at midnight.

_________________________________________________________________

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