Re: Mike update

[Guest guest]

, in nj,

Sorry you couldnt connect on the chat, sounds like you could have

used it tonight.

My theory is that if you plan ahead, you are ready to face any

situation. You sound organized, so that's half the battle, no?

I hope that you can connect with all the pro's on monday and get

the school straightened out - again!!

hugs. take care. wendy, in canada

------------------------

- lippoliti@... wrote:

Hi,

I am so frustrated because we have crashed. Mike has. Didn't

notice too much, but Tuesday he got a detention for almost getting in

a fight with another kid. Served it Wednesday. Thursday got another

detention for threatening a girl, but he would not tell us what it

was really all about.

Friday he overslept and I STUCK to my end of the bargin. I went

to work on time and left him sleeping in bed. He did get up, call me

and walked his 2 miles to school. He admitted that he did hear the

clock and me calling him, but just was too tired to get up. He was

sorry.I was surprised he went to school at all- been easier for him

to stay home. We went to our family/Mike therapist and Mike refused

to talk about the detentions. He was given consequences, and then

started to spill his gut when the session was ending. Doesn't count,

we couldn't discuss it, so consequences were downgraded, he only lost

the tv for a week instead of all electronic stuff.

Saturday he was like a yo-yo, and we finally decided he was

doing the same nasty mean stuff he was before he got treated with

penicillin. Also regressed to baby talk, opposition, refusal to

follow any direction, banging on his head, singing stupid silly made

up songs....and consequences do not change his behavior at all. Nor

do rewards. This had disappeared from the beginning of Sept. until

this weekend. And the psych and neuro and mom think the penicillin

treatment helped him, or helped him employ his behavioral therapy

techniques. So I am taking the day off again tomorrow so I can talk

to the neuro, psych, behavior therapist, school, etc. (It is too

hard to do this at work-there is a no personal phone call policy, and

it is too stressful to try to get calls without 'getting caught'.) I

am in the mood for another dose of antibiotics-only the neuro was not

sure how we would give the next round if he became unstable again. I

am game for anything-I know this is not the Mike that he wants to be-

he will say he can't control his behavior this week like he could

last week and he isn't sure why. He is usually very inciteful.

So it has been one of those awful days, it seems everyday since

Thursday has gotten worse. We are ready to take him to crisis

intervention because he is so unstable and yo-yoish.

We have also found that specific things that were brought up at

his IEP meeting that we wanted included, were not. We were given a

working draft, and it seems that it didn't get revised. I will also

start that battle tomorrow. I thought I did this last month!

Researched stuff, had my wish list for the IEP and the rational, and

the team agreed; our behavior therapist supported us, etc. In fact,

because of the detrimental effect homework has on homelife, he is to

have it limited to an afterschool program, and minimal writing at

home. And for some reason he is not getting copies of class notes.

I am off to battle the CST tomorrow.

There is only 10 more hours until the doctor's offices open. I

will make it.!! I will go read my book, " The Little Engine that

could.... "

Thanks for letting me vent. I just hate this mess. Hugs to you

all, in NJ

_______________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

,

I just wanted to send you big encouraging, understanding hugs! I'm so

sorry Mike has crashed! I hope the professionals can help you figure it

out tomorrow! I'm right there with you. We finally got Ian to a

theraputic level of Lithium (blood level showing .8 at 900 mg) and he

had the worst meltdown of his life, we bumped him up to 1200 mg, his

rages got worse. We've dropped the Lithium and started Tegretol as of

tonight. I got tired of " asking " teachers anything, I just told them,

THIS IS HOW IT WILL BE. We have the IEP meeting on the 26th to formally

revise, and I am not leaving until the IEP is correct or until they

adopt Ian.

Good luck, I'll be thinking about you and keeping my fingers crossed!

in TX

[Guest guest]

HI :

Hugs to you. You are doing an amazing job in very difficult circumstances.

I am so impressed at your understanding of what all this must feel like for

Mike. When in your shoes I was often way more aware of my upset than as I

was of my son, Steve's. It really helps get things back on track to have

your insights rather than my usual approach.

Please keep us updated on your progress. Take care, aloha, Kathy (h)

kathyh@...

At 03:20 AM 09/24/2001 -0000, you wrote:

>Hi,

> I am so frustrated because we have crashed. Mike has. Didn't

>notice too much, but Tuesday he got a detention for almost getting in

>a fight with another kid. Served it Wednesday. Thursday got another

>detention for threatening a girl, but he would not tell us what it

>was really all about.

> Friday he overslept and I STUCK to my end of the bargin. I went

>to work on time and left him sleeping in bed. He did get up, call me

>and walked his 2 miles to school. He admitted that he did hear the

>clock and me calling him, but just was too tired to get up. He was

>sorry.I was surprised he went to school at all- been easier for him

>to stay home. We went to our family/Mike therapist and Mike refused

>to talk about the detentions. He was given consequences, and then

>started to spill his gut when the session was ending. Doesn't count,

>we couldn't discuss it, so consequences were downgraded, he only lost

>the tv for a week instead of all electronic stuff.

> Saturday he was like a yo-yo, and we finally decided he was

>doing the same nasty mean stuff he was before he got treated with

>penicillin. Also regressed to baby talk, opposition, refusal to

>follow any direction, banging on his head, singing stupid silly made

>up songs....and consequences do not change his behavior at all. Nor

>do rewards. This had disappeared from the beginning of Sept. until

>this weekend. And the psych and neuro and mom think the penicillin

>treatment helped him, or helped him employ his behavioral therapy

>techniques. So I am taking the day off again tomorrow so I can talk

>to the neuro, psych, behavior therapist, school, etc. (It is too

>hard to do this at work-there is a no personal phone call policy, and

>it is too stressful to try to get calls without 'getting caught'.) I

>am in the mood for another dose of antibiotics-only the neuro was not

>sure how we would give the next round if he became unstable again. I

>am game for anything-I know this is not the Mike that he wants to be-

>he will say he can't control his behavior this week like he could

>last week and he isn't sure why. He is usually very inciteful.

> So it has been one of those awful days, it seems everyday since

>Thursday has gotten worse. We are ready to take him to crisis

>intervention because he is so unstable and yo-yoish.

> We have also found that specific things that were brought up at

>his IEP meeting that we wanted included, were not. We were given a

>working draft, and it seems that it didn't get revised. I will also

>start that battle tomorrow. I thought I did this last month!

>Researched stuff, had my wish list for the IEP and the rational, and

>the team agreed; our behavior therapist supported us, etc. In fact,

>because of the detrimental effect homework has on homelife, he is to

>have it limited to an afterschool program, and minimal writing at

>home. And for some reason he is not getting copies of class notes.

>I am off to battle the CST tomorrow.

> There is only 10 more hours until the doctor's offices open. I

>will make it.!! I will go read my book, " The Little Engine that

>could.... "

> Thanks for letting me vent. I just hate this mess. Hugs to you

>all, in NJ

[Guest guest]

wrote: " I told them THIS IS HOW IT WILL BE "

I LOVE IT !!! You go !!! Don't settle for ANYTHING less than

you and Ian deserve!!!

Both of you are WORTH it!

Stay strong,

Joni in VA

> ,

> I just wanted to send you big encouraging, understanding hugs! I'm

so

> sorry Mike has crashed! I hope the professionals can help you

figure it

> out tomorrow! I'm right there with you. We finally got Ian to a

> theraputic level of Lithium (blood level showing .8 at 900 mg) and

he

> had the worst meltdown of his life, we bumped him up to 1200 mg, his

> rages got worse. We've dropped the Lithium and started Tegretol as

of

> tonight. I got tired of " asking " teachers anything, I just told

them,

> THIS IS HOW IT WILL BE. We have the IEP meeting on the 26th to

formally

> revise, and I am not leaving until the IEP is correct or until they

> adopt Ian.

> Good luck, I'll be thinking about you and keeping my fingers

crossed!

> in TX

[Guest guest]

Dear ,

I'm so sorry you've hit a low point. It is so unbelieveably hard when our kids crash and we don't know why, or what to do... And to have to try to deal with it all while still maintaining the rest of your life - I know it feels impossible. It sounds like you have a good group of doctors who are involved. Don't you just wish you could call them all together into one room and have a day-long "let's solve the Mike problem" conference?? I know I get tired of being the "case manager" for my daughter, running from one person to another, explaining what Dr. X thought and what the teacher thinks, and what we did last week at therapy. But hang in there and try to remember that these hard times are always followed by better times (they tend to zip by unnoticed though because suddenly life becomes almost "normal"). This too shall pass.

Hugs and best wishes to you,

[Guest guest]

,

I am so sorry you and Mike have had an awful week. I know how tough

and all encompasing it can be. We are in a particularly rough time

with also. It is so hard to see your child totally different

from the one that you raised. I don't have any words of wisdom for

you...only empathy. I do totally support your leaving Mike in bed

when he wouldn't arise in time to get you to work on time. I know

how hard that is because I have done that myself (with both kids,

actually). When I have done it, I usually have a knot in my stomach

as I back out of the driveway.

This has started out to be an awful year for us too. wastes

so much time...is not getting enough sleep because of it...and is not

compliant with our rules regarding exercise/homework/sleep. I do

know now why mothers walk away from their families...I have

considered this many times lately ;-)

Hang in there. We are behind you all the way. Know you are not

alone.

((((((HUGS)))))))

Melinda S.

Dallas

> Hi,

> I am so frustrated because we have crashed. Mike has. Didn't

> notice too much, but Tuesday he got a detention for almost getting

in

> a fight with another kid. Served it Wednesday. Thursday got

another

> detention for threatening a girl, but he would not tell us what it

> was really all about.

> Friday he overslept and I STUCK to my end of the bargin. I

went

> to work on time and left him sleeping in bed. He did get up, call

me

> and walked his 2 miles to school. He admitted that he did hear the

> clock and me calling him, but just was too tired to get up. He was

> sorry.I was surprised he went to school at all- been easier for him

> to stay home. We went to our family/Mike therapist and Mike

refused

> to talk about the detentions. He was given consequences, and then

> started to spill his gut when the session was ending. Doesn't

count,

> we couldn't discuss it, so consequences were downgraded, he only

lost

> the tv for a week instead of all electronic stuff.

> Saturday he was like a yo-yo, and we finally decided he was

> doing the same nasty mean stuff he was before he got treated with

> penicillin. Also regressed to baby talk, opposition, refusal to

> follow any direction, banging on his head, singing stupid silly

made

> up songs....and consequences do not change his behavior at all.

Nor

> do rewards. This had disappeared from the beginning of Sept. until

> this weekend. And the psych and neuro and mom think the penicillin

> treatment helped him, or helped him employ his behavioral therapy

> techniques. So I am taking the day off again tomorrow so I can

talk

> to the neuro, psych, behavior therapist, school, etc. (It is too

> hard to do this at work-there is a no personal phone call policy,

and

> it is too stressful to try to get calls without 'getting caught'.)

I

> am in the mood for another dose of antibiotics-only the neuro was

not

> sure how we would give the next round if he became unstable again.

I

> am game for anything-I know this is not the Mike that he wants to

be-

> he will say he can't control his behavior this week like he could

> last week and he isn't sure why. He is usually very inciteful.

> So it has been one of those awful days, it seems everyday

since

> Thursday has gotten worse. We are ready to take him to crisis

> intervention because he is so unstable and yo-yoish.

> We have also found that specific things that were brought up

at

> his IEP meeting that we wanted included, were not. We were given a

> working draft, and it seems that it didn't get revised. I will

also

> start that battle tomorrow. I thought I did this last month!

> Researched stuff, had my wish list for the IEP and the rational,

and

> the team agreed; our behavior therapist supported us, etc. In

fact,

> because of the detrimental effect homework has on homelife, he is

to

> have it limited to an afterschool program, and minimal writing at

> home. And for some reason he is not getting copies of class

notes.

> I am off to battle the CST tomorrow.

> There is only 10 more hours until the doctor's offices open.

I

> will make it.!! I will go read my book, " The Little Engine that

> could.... "

> Thanks for letting me vent. I just hate this mess. Hugs to

you

> all, in NJ

[Guest guest]

Dear ,

Thanks for those great hugs. I really needed them. I am so behind in my mail right now, and since I wrote to Vivian all the details, please just read it there.

I hope the Tegretol brings some stability to Ian's moods. Mike started with depakote, and then we added lithium and he did better. Once we found the right lithium-seems like he was really sensitive to it and it caused him alot of urinary frequency and urgency. The best thing was getting his depakote to a higher level, as it had been much lower to treat a seizure disorder. I LOVE IT. It will be this way or they will adopt IAN. I will keep that line in mind and borrow it. I have said I thought school should be in session from sun up to sundown 7 days a week year round! I thought instead of giving homework they could just stretch out the year and do the homework in class!! Then I wouldn't hate homework!! Hope Ian balances out soon-I sympathize with the waiting game. Hugs to you too. In NJ I just wanted to send you big encouraging, understanding hugs! I'm sosorry Mike has crashed! I hope the professionals can help you figure itout tomorrow! I'm right there with you. We finally got Ian to atheraputic level of Lithium (blood level showing .8 at 900 mg) and hehad the worst meltdown of his life, we bumped him up to 1200 mg, hisrages got worse. We've dropped the Lithium and started Tegretol as oftonight. I got tired of "asking" teachers anything, I just told them,THIS IS HOW IT WILL BE. We have the IEP meeting on the 26th to formallyrevise, and I am not leaving until the IEP is correct or until theyadopt Ian.Good luck, I'll be thinking about you and keeping my fingers crossed! in TX

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[Guest guest]

In a message dated 10/27/01 8:54:28 PM Eastern Standard Time,

cjoye16@... writes:

> Last Tuesday, we had a speaker come in to

> our schools who told parents, teachers and kids from 3rd grade up to

> 12th that teasing should be treated the same as a racial slur would

> be! Our school district, for the most part does not put up with this

> kind of stuff too much, but a lot of teasing blows right past the

> teachers

I wish my son's school would have this speaker and that the teachers would

take it seriously. My son has been harassed since he had Asthma at age 5 (he

is now 10). The medication has steroids in it so he gained weight. The kids

tease him about this. It is NOT his fault!!! Last week my son was told he was

fat and the kids kept making fun of him at lunch time. He has a right to eat

his food in peace! I called the school and left a message for the teacher to

look into this. He left a message on my machine that he feels this should be

dealt with the day it happens not the day after. He said he would look into

it. I never heard from him!!! Maybe a lawsuit is in order. This is not the

first time I got the brush off. The principle looks at things like no child

is innocent and they both need to be punished! Who do I call??? The

Superintendent feels the same way! So I am lost as to what to do. This has

made his OCD worse!!

Tammy