Re: Rant (warning!!!!)

[Guest guest]

Oh sweetie... Many soft hugs. I been there too. I know it's frustrating

To be sick and then ok the next moment.

Being sick is no fun at all.. We fear things that really are not to be fear.

I too think My husband gets tired of me being sick a lot too. Since we found

Out I have lupus it's an ongoing thing now. Never know from day to day what it's going

To be. So U know what I thought about? Live one moment at a time.. Enjoy the times

We do have that is good. And when the bad comes? I find that just hanging on and just

Lay down. Do nothing, let it pass or do something else just to move around.

Gentle hugs.

Evanna

-- Rant (warning!!!!)

Hi all, bad day so I need to rant, I know that I haven't been here in

a while so Im sorry; please feel free to not read this if you dont

care.

Tom and I had our annual bowling banquet tonight, we went with our

friends Mark and Jane. After the banquet we came back to the house

with Mark and Jane and I wound up in the ER again! I'm so tired of

this crap!!!!! Im so tired of being sick all the time, I HATE

depending on people for things that I should be able to do myself, Im

afraid that Tom is gonna get sick of me and take off (ok, probably an

unfounded fear, but.....)

I want a real life, I want a family of Tom and I + children, I want

to not have to pinch every penny until it screams, I want to be done

with school and settled down, I want stability in my life. I want to

not have my emotions bounced around by these damn steroids!

dammit!!!! One minute I am doing ok, then Im suicidal, then Im

worried that Tom is either leaving or cheating, then Im ok again,

then I bite the heads off of the people that care the most about me,

then Im crying and apologizing. Even I need a magic 8 ball to tell

what mood is coming next.

Well, enough ranting for tonight, Im sure that I will get some

interesting calls tomorrow as it is.

Thanks for reading

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