7 year old with ocd

[Guest guest]

Kathy, thank you. I'm going to try tonight to give Sullivan Benedryl to see

if it will help her sleep.

What are some questions I might ask a doctor when interviewing ? What do I

tell Sullivan when we find a dr. and she says she doesn't want to go?

I appreciate all your help.

Anne

[Guest guest]

Hi Ann, I don't have any earth-shattering advice, but I too have a 7

year old daughter with OCD. I have a son that's four and she picks on him

incessantly. Our Doctor said to let it go, if we punish it, it escalates. I

have a really hard time following that advice. I worry that my son will pick

up the horrid behaviors! Well, good luck to you, hang in there. Katy Hops

[Guest guest]

Hello Anne, I am also the Mom of a 7-year-old (as of yesterday) who's

had OCD for two years. I can especially relate to the o/c's regarding doing

socially unacceptable things as my daughter struggles with this also.

You wrote:

> I have read many books and consulted doctors but so far she has been

> unwilling to get into therapy. I am afraid if I push her she will

> stop telling me her " worries " and start hiding them. I've done some

> cognitive behavioral therapy with her and been somewhat successful.

I am my daughter's " therapist " as I have be unable to find anyone who will

work with her due to her age. If you are able to find a therapist who does

E & RP for OCD in young children, s/he will likely have several good

suggestions to encourage your daughter towards doing the work needed to boss

OCD out of her life. I don't know how or if entering therapy may cause your

daughter to stop telling you her worries, but this has happened with my

child regardless as she's gotten older. Some of this is due to OCD

threatening her with bad things if she tells.

> My biggest difficulty right now is she is extremely moody and mean to

> her 3 year old sister. She's had typical sibling rivalry issues but

> lately (6weeks) she's been completely intolerant of her sister. She

> is angry and thinks my husband and I pick on her.

> It's so distressing because I don't know what is OCD and what is

> typical 7 year old stuff. I give her timeouts for being mean with her

> sister and she will stay in her room and brood for long periods of

> time.

The moodiness and meaness may be your daughter's reaction to the stress of

living with untreated OCD. Many of us have noticed that these types of

troubles disappear or diminish significantly when the OCD is properly

treated--CBT or meds, or both. Do you find that giving your daughter these

timeouts is successful, that they reduce the behavior? If not you may be

dealing with an unrecognized compulsion in your daughter. Usually

consequencing OCD behavior is unsuccessful.

> Do you think I should force her into therapy? Is there anything I can

> do to help her control her anger, or express it without hurting her

> sister?

Force is a strong word :-) but I'm a fan of bribing and enticing and

rewarding. At first it's scary to consider saying no to OCD and E & RP is

hard work, so I have used stickers, outings, toys and so on as incentives

and rewards for good effort. Of course the ultimate reward of CBT therapy

is being freed from compulsions, but a young child may not understand that

to begin.

I may be bumping heads with others on the list, but I did simply tell my

then-five year old daughter we would be doing the boss-back practices

because it was the way to make OCD small. Of course this approach would not

work with some kids and surely not older ones, but at the time I likened it

to insisting she have dental checkups, vaccinations etc. even though she

would rather have not. And certainly never chosen on her own! It was

necessary.

> This is my first time on a chat line and I've never been in a support

> group before, but I need one because I am just heartbroken seeing my

> beautiful daughter suffer.

I'm glad you found us, hope the list is helpful to you. Watching our

children suffer with OCD is very difficult but please know that your

daughter can pulled out from under this burden, and sometimes surprisingly

quickly, with proper treatment.

Kathy R in Indiana

[Guest guest]

Anne, you wrote:

> By the way, do you share this with your friends and classmates parents?

In

> my desperation of the past two years I think I've told too many people and

I

> now regret it. Sullivan has no behavioral problems at school or with her

> friends so I know that they don't see it or are affected by it, but I feel

> I've invaded her privacy.

I generally tell others about Kel's diagnosis if they have a need to know

about it--teachers and so on. My daughter told everyone including the

mailman about OCD around the time she was diagnosed (at age five) but now at

seven is more private about it so I follow suit. A strange thing I've

noticed is that, since generally people don't seem to know too much about

OCD, many who I confided in around the time of her onset now assume it's

over or cured. That my daughter also doesn't show symptoms in public--or at

least, not ones that others recognize as OCD--probably encourages this

mistake.

> Anyway, sorry it's so long, I haven't had this oppurtunity before.

Why does everyone apologize for long posts?!! They are my favorites :-)

Kathy R in Indiana

[Guest guest]

I wish I could remember the name for that moving hand thing that is sposed to help. Dan's previous therapist tried it on him, but it didn't do anything. I read later that there is no evidence that it helps OCD. It was originally devised to help people with post traumatic stress disorder.

I'm glad you got her a puppy. Dan's dogs are about the only thing he doesn't get contamination obsessions about.

Judy

Re: 7 year old with ocd

Kathy,Thanks for the good advice. Sullivan and I are extremely close and she knows she can trust me with her "secrets". I don't want to betray her but I think I'd be foolish not to at least try to find a therapist she can relate to. I got a name of a dr that I called last night and he said he has some "technique" involving talking to Sullivan and having him follow his hands ( sort of hypnotism) and it somehow links to the brain and helps the ocd symptoms lessen. He says he's been quite successful with it and takes only a few sessions with some yearly follow up. Yes, I am VERY sceptical, but since my husband and I will be in there with her and she has to do little besides be present, maybe it's a place to start. I have gotten names of a few other therapist but have not interviewed them. We got Sullivan a puppy last week and her spirits have been really good. She told me yesterday she only had 1 "worry" all day. YEAH! She does find it VERY difficult to fall to sleep though. Thanks for the help and advice. I really thought we were alone and then to find so many of you, and with 7 year olds, wow. I am very gratefulAnneYou may subscribe to the OCD-L by emailing listserv@... . In the body of your message write: subscribe OCD-L your name. You may subscribe to the Parents of Adults with OCD List at parentsofadultswithOCD . You may access the files, links, and archives for our list at . Our list advisors are Tamar Chansky, Ph.D., and Aureen Pinto Wagner, Ph.D. Our list moderators are Birkhan, Kathy Hammes, Jule Monnens, Gail Pesses, Kathy , Roman, and Jackie Stout. Subscription issues or suggestions may be addressed to Louis Harkins, list owner, at harkins@... .

[Guest guest]

Hi Anne,

We also have a DD w/OCD who was diagnosed at age 4. She takes Prozac

(as she is unable to function without it) and it helps to control her

worries - but does not take them away completely. She threw up in the

school cafeteria last March and since then has worried about throwing

up. Fortunately, we have found an incredible therapist who specializes

in children's anxiety disorders. She does CBT w/DD and we have seen a

difference in the amount of worrying that DD does since she sees this

therapist. DD also has trouble relaxing and falling asleep at night.

She often wants to lay w/us and will seek us out in the middle of the

night. The therapist gave us a wonderful relaxation CD that is made

just for kids. It helps them to relax in " kid language " . It has

really helped relax DD and settle her down in times of worrying. If

you'd like the information on the CD - just let me know and I will look

it up.

I hope that things improve for your DD very soon.

Anne