My son is suffering. Please help!

[Guest guest]

Hello..

This is my first post to the group. I am writing about my 20 year old son,

Brad, who is mildly/moderately mentally handicapped (Full Scale IQ, 67). He

has been formally diagnosed autistic (age 8), but he also has symptoms that

I'm concerned might be OCD or something else entirely. He has been

exhibiting unusual behaviors since the age of 12... I'm so worried and I hope

someone can help me figure out what is going on!

His 'odd' behaviors:

1.) Checking doors to make sure they are locked and nothing is dropped on

floor upon entering and leaving house (approx. 1 - 2 minutes at a time)

2.) Opening and closing door several times upon entering bedroom (approx. 15

seconds - he only does this occasionally.)

3.) Staring at answering machine to make sure it is turned on (approx. 1 - 2

min; this happens several times throughout the day.)

4.) Repeating something he said if he doesn't feel acknowledged or

understood; this doesn't happen excessively, maybe 3 times per conversation

with a distracted listener as his mom!

5.) Fears that if his brothers don't screw the cap on tight enough on the OJ

in the fridge, the OJ might drip down and leak onto his saran-wrapped

leftovers. (No contamination fear it seems - more that he just doesn't " like "

the idea of OJ making friends with his pancakes.). He is not overly neat or

tidy either.

6.) Standing by phone waiting for call he is expecting; getting very

distraught and cranky if person doesn't call. It ruins his entire day.

7.) When he gets a phone call from friend, he is afraid he might not have

said something to the person " correctly " or " nicely " enough, or that he said

something to make that other person mad. He frequently needs me to assure

him that he didn't make the person mad.

8.) He seems uncomfortable unless I directly acknowledge something he says,

either by paraphrasing or responding directly to what he just said. Like

he'll say, " The birds out there are beautiful " , and if I say, " Oh yeah that's

true...by the way Jessie is coming home today " ...he gets very uptight and

will repeat, " Did you hear me, mom? I said the birds out there are

beautiful. " So unless I repeat what he just said or carry the phrase with

" Yes! The birds ARE beautiful! " his body gets all tense and he'll find some

way during the middle of the conversation to shift the topic back to what he

was saying. It doesn't seem like an overt thing most of the time...he just

gets withdrawn/sulky/anxious if I don't immediately acknowledge him (This

happens quite often - I can't tell if it's part of his intellectual handicap

or not). When it is time to say " goodbye " , he says " bye " and after I say

" bye " he walks out the door and says another " bye " - that type of thing.

9.) Fears that a salesperson knocking on the door might mean that that person

is 'after' him and bothering him 'on purpose'. He frequently needs assurance

that it is just a sales pitch and nothing else. (I notice frequently he seems

very upset about something, but often there is something about my words that

will soothe him - as if my assurance that everything is OK is his only

connection with reality. I TRULY believe that he is smart enough to know

this on his own; that after so many reassurances he will know that no one is

" out to get " him. But after trying to see it from his perspective, as a

mentally handicapped person with various oversensitivities and difficulties

in abstract thinking, I realize how terrifying the world must be for him. And

my heart aches as I can't peek into his little world and know exactly what is

going on. Maybe I let him watch too many scary TV shows!

i am crying as I write this. my son is such a lovable person and tries so

hard. I feel that much of his behavior is a desire to be liked and socially

accepted in a world that must seem incredibly cruel and confusing to him.

I would like to take him to a neurologist, but before I do that I'd like some

opinions here first. Does this sound at all like OCD? If so does it sound

full-blown enough to warrant attention, or could I be overreacting? Please

help!

HMomof3@...