Re: Info getting on the ball

[Guest guest]

Amber,

He's not a jerk. He just doesnt understand. Men are like that. They

dont have the sympathy or empathy that women have. Its not his

fault. Nor is it your fault. You are going through a SERIOUSLY

emotional time right now and no one can feel what you are feeling,

not even any of us who have gone through or are going through

EXACTLY the same thing. Putting blame on anyone right now wont help

anything. Honestly, even if its just saying that he doesnt care. You

know that he does. He wouldnt be there if he didnt. Zane is his son

and you are his wife. Im sure that even if he doesnt say it or act

like it you are the most important things in his life. Men have a

terrible habit of only seeing whats in front of their faces. Right

now its a messy house. They dont see, or care to see that the rest

of the world is a mess too. Thats the woman's job. Ask anyone...

even my husband. He could care less if the NEIGHBOR needed help, as

long as his house came first. The only advice I can give you to help

him understand, is to SHOW him that he and " his kingdom " come first.

He is a man and thats the way his brain works. Im not saying that

you should bow to his " ever present greatness. " Nor that you should

stop everything for his every whim, or even stop researching

something that OBVIOUSLY is a passion for you on a deeply personal

level. What I am suggesting is that maybe you should talk to him

about setting aside a time for YOU. Time when you dont have to " do

chores " and that you can " surf the net, " watch T.V, read a book, or

take a bubble bath. Even if you can just agree on on hour a day. Or

do just the opposite, agree that you will be at his " beck and call "

for a few hours or a certain time of day. Anything he asks youll

do... Haha!! I can see that causing trouble ;-) I could just imagine

the things MY HUSBAND would ask for!! LOL!! Anyway, I learned the

hard way that you have to make serious compromises and communicate

EVERYTHING with men. The simpler the better. They dont get it and

never will. Its your job to help them along. Trust me sweetie, itll

get better!! Just dont give up hope!! We are all here if you need

us!! Even if its to VENT!!! *gives you a big hug*

[Guest guest]

,

Great advice...

I could not agree with you more.

heather