Re: Confronting girlfriend about weight?

[Guest guest]

There really is no subtle way to tell a woman she is getting

overweight, LOL. Maybe you could just say that you think it would be

a good idea if the both of you adopted a healthier lifestyle. If you

are willing to try the program with her, she might not feel like you

are attacking her personally. If you have the book, you might be able

to " accidentally " leave it on the coffee table or something. If she

shows an interest, you could tell her about the program. The bottom

line is, she has to want to do this for herself, you cannot simply

say " You need to go on a diet " . She will resent you, and you run the

risk of sending her deeper into the fridge. Tough situation, Dex...

Good luck.

> How would a gentleman politely tell his woman she is becoming a bit

> chunky without getting slapped? lol I've kept silent for the last

> year or two hoping she'd lose the weight on her own but now that

the

> weight gain has exceeded 30 lbs I think it's time to say something.

> My girlfriends mother is about 200 lbs so I know the tendency to

gain

> weight is there genetically. I personally wouldn't mind a few extra

> pounds on her but it is beginning to affect her self esteem and

> attitude. Also, in the long run it's not healthy. At 15 pounds a

year

> the possibilities worry me.

[Guest guest]

You don't! LOL

I got started on a healthier lifestyle was taking a kickboxing class

in college. It was fun but it also made me more aware of my body and

how out of shape I had become. Each week got easier and I was

hooked! Try taking a class together, going bike riding or

rollerblading. Just be active and it can all fall into place!

Sparkles

> How would a gentleman politely tell his woman she is becoming a bit

> chunky without getting slapped? lol I've kept silent for the last

> year or two hoping she'd lose the weight on her own but now that

the

> weight gain has exceeded 30 lbs I think it's time to say something.

> My girlfriends mother is about 200 lbs so I know the tendency to

gain

> weight is there genetically. I personally wouldn't mind a few extra

> pounds on her but it is beginning to affect her self esteem and

> attitude. Also, in the long run it's not healthy. At 15 pounds a

year

> the possibilities worry me.

[Guest guest]

Hi Dex,

My first thought was, what's making her gain the weight? I would also

be first to suspect she isn't happy, or something in her life is

going on, stress maybe that is causing her to eat more. Is there

anything you can put your finger on that's changed in the timeframe

she's been gaining? If not, I'd ask her. If there isn't anything

wrong, I'm not sure how long you've been together, but maybe she's

starting to feel comfortable enough around you to fill out alittle.

I'd check her emotional condition first. I dont think there is a good

way to tell someone they're gaining weight. How do you know it's

30lbs? Did she say? Do you live together, and do you cook? If so you

could have control over cooking you both healthy foods and portions.

If she doesn't exercise, you could ask her to go on walks, or do a

sport you both enjoy. I think trying these things without saying

anything would be best. You said it's hurting her self esteem. Is

that what she tells you? If so, you could jump in and tell her you

want to help her by doing X Y Z, right? Good luck!

Kristy

> How would a gentleman politely tell his woman she is becoming a bit

> chunky without getting slapped? lol I've kept silent for the last

> year or two hoping she'd lose the weight on her own but now that

the

> weight gain has exceeded 30 lbs I think it's time to say something.

> My girlfriends mother is about 200 lbs so I know the tendency to

gain

> weight is there genetically. I personally wouldn't mind a few extra

> pounds on her but it is beginning to affect her self esteem and

> attitude. Also, in the long run it's not healthy. At 15 pounds a

year

> the possibilities worry me.

[Guest guest]

Dex it's good to hear that your main concern is for her emotional and

psychological health (self-esteem/attitude) rather than just her

weight. Sometimes women can use food if they are feeling overwhelemed

in other areas of their lives. It might be a good idea to just start

going to the gym and working out and simply tell her that you'd like

for her to join you sometimes. That way she'll have the opportunity

to take control of her fitness on her own and won't feel as if she is

doing it to please you. Good luck with things

> How would a gentleman politely tell his woman she is becoming a bit

> chunky without getting slapped? lol I've kept silent for the last

> year or two hoping she'd lose the weight on her own but now that

the

> weight gain has exceeded 30 lbs I think it's time to say something.

> My girlfriends mother is about 200 lbs so I know the tendency to

gain

> weight is there genetically. I personally wouldn't mind a few extra

> pounds on her but it is beginning to affect her self esteem and

> attitude. Also, in the long run it's not healthy. At 15 pounds a

year

> the possibilities worry me.