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My 15 year old daughter insists that she cannot do any chores or homework

without playing music. She also feels agitated if we cannot play music while

riding in the car. We have noticed this for some time. (Gratefully, she

loves classical music and celtic fiddle which are more tolerable to the rest

of us than some of the pop stuff.) Yesterday she was doing a chore and

playing music through the whole-house stereo system. When I asked her to

turn it down, she said she cannot keep focused on what she is doing without

the music.

At times of transition, like rushing out the door for church or some other

event, she either hums or whistles. This too seems like a coping device to

keep focused on getting ready to go. Is she using music and sounds to drown

out distracting thoughts? Is she obsessing on rhythm patterns or counting in

her brain? Are there other explanations that fit?

Her anxiety rises dramatically at transition times like leaving to go

somewhere; is this somehow helping her to distract herself?

She is a musician and plays piano and violin.

Dean

Indiana

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Hi:

Is your daughter getting CBT from a therapist? If so I suggest you bring

this symptom up and ask for it to be addressed in therapy. If not, I hope

you can find a therapist to work with her on this. When you say she feels

agitated if there is no music, that is a clue that somehow the music is

part of her compulsion or ritual that she uses to make her anxiety from the

obsessions lessen. This only works in the short term and unfortunately

only makes the OCD worse in the long term.

To find out what is going on you really need to ask your daughter. Luckily

with OCD it is not necessary to understand all the underlying issues behind

OCD behaviors to treat them. It helps to understand the OCDers connection

between their obsessions and compulsions but very often due to

embarrassment they will not explain what is up.

OCD has a very mean way of attacking the sufferer by using the very things

that have the most important meanings to them. In your daughter's case she

obviously has musical talent, interest and enjoyment and the OCD monster is

able to use this to intensify her suffering. With help from you and a

skilled therapist she will be able to turn the tables on OCD and get back

to typical enjoyment of music again.

Our beloved OCDers often suffer from chronic inflexibility so changing

activities can be difficult. As their OCD gets more under control this

improves. Knowing this in advance helps us not get upset ourselves when we

see this happen. That way we can do the best thing to help them cope

rather than struggle to cope ourselves.

Good luck, take care, aloha, Kathy (H)

kathyh@...

At 01:57 PM 02/06/2000 EST, you wrote:

>From: DRHEISEY@...

>

>My 15 year old daughter insists that she cannot do any chores or homework

>without playing music. She also feels agitated if we cannot play music

while

>riding in the car. We have noticed this for some time. (Gratefully, she

>loves classical music and celtic fiddle which are more tolerable to the rest

>of us than some of the pop stuff.) Yesterday she was doing a chore and

>playing music through the whole-house stereo system. When I asked her to

>turn it down, she said she cannot keep focused on what she is doing without

>the music.

>

>At times of transition, like rushing out the door for church or some other

>event, she either hums or whistles. This too seems like a coping device to

>keep focused on getting ready to go. Is she using music and sounds to drown

>out distracting thoughts? Is she obsessing on rhythm patterns or counting

in

>her brain? Are there other explanations that fit?

>

>Her anxiety rises dramatically at transition times like leaving to go

>somewhere; is this somehow helping her to distract herself?

>

>She is a musician and plays piano and violin.

>

>Dean

>Indiana

>

>---------------------------

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Hi Dean,

I read with interest your post about your daughter and music, as well as

Kathy H.s' response to it. You've raised some good questions.

My daughter is six and very musical. She too often requires music while

riding in the car. I had not thought of this as a compulsion but rather

a healthy distraction from her anxious, OCD-related car feelings.

Perhaps I ought to discuss this with her therapist.

She also responds to music with very deep emotions. Any somber or even

thoughtful piece (such as Canon in D) can reduce her to tears.

I will be interested to learn more about this.

Take care,

Lesli (San Francisco Bay but a former Indiana resident)

DRHEISEY@... wrote:

>

> From: DRHEISEY@...

>

> My 15 year old daughter insists that she cannot do any chores or homework

> without playing music. She also feels agitated if we cannot play music while

> riding in the car. We have noticed this for some time. (Gratefully, she

> loves classical music and celtic fiddle which are more tolerable to the rest

> of us than some of the pop stuff.) Yesterday she was doing a chore and

> playing music through the whole-house stereo system. When I asked her to

> turn it down, she said she cannot keep focused on what she is doing without

> the music.

>

> At times of transition, like rushing out the door for church or some other

> event, she either hums or whistles. This too seems like a coping device to

> keep focused on getting ready to go. Is she using music and sounds to drown

> out distracting thoughts? Is she obsessing on rhythm patterns or counting in

> her brain? Are there other explanations that fit?

>

> Her anxiety rises dramatically at transition times like leaving to go

> somewhere; is this somehow helping her to distract herself?

>

> She is a musician and plays piano and violin.

>

> Dean

> Indiana

>

> ---------------------------

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Hi Lesli, my daughter is also musical and everything you wrote about yours

has been true of Kel for several years--always wanting it playing in the

car, the dramatic emotional responses to music--and I hadn't thought of this

as being related to OCD either. She also has musical talent and was picking

out songs she'd heard on " Barney " on a toy piano at 14 months, and she has a

prodigious memory for melodies, once heard, never forgotten. If this is

OCD-related, it's one thing that does preceed her official " onset " a year

ago. She began piano lessons last fall, and OCD zeroed right in on this to

an unusual degree (many obsessions and compulsions.) I thought it was the

lessons or the teacher, but now I wonder if it's something about music

itself.

BTW, I've been having server problems again this past week. I will post the

PANDAS sites I mentioned earlier as soon as I can.

Kathy R. in Indiana

> From: Masoud & Lesli Molaei <desk@...>

>

> Hi Dean,

>

> I read with interest your post about your daughter and music, as well as

> Kathy H.s' response to it. You've raised some good questions.

>

> My daughter is six and very musical. She too often requires music while

> riding in the car. I had not thought of this as a compulsion but rather

> a healthy distraction from her anxious, OCD-related car feelings.

> Perhaps I ought to discuss this with her therapist.

>

> She also responds to music with very deep emotions. Any somber or even

> thoughtful piece (such as Canon in D) can reduce her to tears.

>

> I will be interested to learn more about this.

>

> Take care,

> Lesli (San Francisco Bay but a former Indiana resident)

>

>

> DRHEISEY@... wrote:

> >

> > From: DRHEISEY@...

> >

> > My 15 year old daughter insists that she cannot do any chores or

homework

> > without playing music. She also feels agitated if we cannot play music

while

> > riding in the car. We have noticed this for some time. (Gratefully,

she

> > loves classical music and celtic fiddle which are more tolerable to the

rest

> > of us than some of the pop stuff.) Yesterday she was doing a chore and

> > playing music through the whole-house stereo system. When I asked her

to

> > turn it down, she said she cannot keep focused on what she is doing

without

> > the music.

> >

> > At times of transition, like rushing out the door for church or some

other

> > event, she either hums or whistles. This too seems like a coping device

to

> > keep focused on getting ready to go. Is she using music and sounds to

drown

> > out distracting thoughts? Is she obsessing on rhythm patterns or

counting in

> > her brain? Are there other explanations that fit?

> >

> > Her anxiety rises dramatically at transition times like leaving to go

> > somewhere; is this somehow helping her to distract herself?

> >

> > She is a musician and plays piano and violin.

> >

> > Dean

> > Indiana

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Kathy, e is just like that (memory for melodies) and oh boy is she

dramatic! e's mom won state when she was11.The dr. of music said she was

so gift at that age maybe one out of million children could sing like

that.But as I was reading your post I remember her telling me she couldn't

get the music out of her head.I feel so bad when I think of all the things

she suffered with because of ocd,and never knew.Love Beth

Re: OCD and Concentration

> From: " Kathy " <klr@...>

>

> Hi Lesli, my daughter is also musical and everything you wrote about yours

> has been true of Kel for several years--always wanting it playing in the

> car, the dramatic emotional responses to music--and I hadn't thought of

this

> as being related to OCD either. She also has musical talent and was

picking

> out songs she'd heard on " Barney " on a toy piano at 14 months, and she has

a

> prodigious memory for melodies, once heard, never forgotten. If this is

> OCD-related, it's one thing that does preceed her official " onset " a year

> ago. She began piano lessons last fall, and OCD zeroed right in on this

to

> an unusual degree (many obsessions and compulsions.) I thought it was the

> lessons or the teacher, but now I wonder if it's something about music

> itself.

>

> BTW, I've been having server problems again this past week. I will post

the

> PANDAS sites I mentioned earlier as soon as I can.

>

> Kathy R. in Indiana

>

>

> > From: Masoud & Lesli Molaei <desk@...>

> >

> > Hi Dean,

> >

> > I read with interest your post about your daughter and music, as well as

> > Kathy H.s' response to it. You've raised some good questions.

> >

> > My daughter is six and very musical. She too often requires music while

> > riding in the car. I had not thought of this as a compulsion but rather

> > a healthy distraction from her anxious, OCD-related car feelings.

> > Perhaps I ought to discuss this with her therapist.

> >

> > She also responds to music with very deep emotions. Any somber or even

> > thoughtful piece (such as Canon in D) can reduce her to tears.

> >

> > I will be interested to learn more about this.

> >

> > Take care,

> > Lesli (San Francisco Bay but a former Indiana resident)

> >

> >

> > DRHEISEY@... wrote:

> > >

> > > From: DRHEISEY@...

> > >

> > > My 15 year old daughter insists that she cannot do any chores or

> homework

> > > without playing music. She also feels agitated if we cannot play

music

> while

> > > riding in the car. We have noticed this for some time. (Gratefully,

> she

> > > loves classical music and celtic fiddle which are more tolerable to

the

> rest

> > > of us than some of the pop stuff.) Yesterday she was doing a chore

and

> > > playing music through the whole-house stereo system. When I asked her

> to

> > > turn it down, she said she cannot keep focused on what she is doing

> without

> > > the music.

> > >

> > > At times of transition, like rushing out the door for church or some

> other

> > > event, she either hums or whistles. This too seems like a coping

device

> to

> > > keep focused on getting ready to go. Is she using music and sounds to

> drown

> > > out distracting thoughts? Is she obsessing on rhythm patterns or

> counting in

> > > her brain? Are there other explanations that fit?

> > >

> > > Her anxiety rises dramatically at transition times like leaving to go

> > > somewhere; is this somehow helping her to distract herself?

> > >

> > > She is a musician and plays piano and violin.

> > >

> > > Dean

> > > Indiana

>

>

>

> ---------------------------

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