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So nice to hear from you. Sounds like you have more need for focus than me. I

have just one w/ ocd. What a powerful change in our life. I never see anyone

as not normal. I believe in every since that all humans have disorders. I am a

high school volleyball coach.

Maybe believing in each kid as an individual and incorporating them into a solid

working unit is what makes me work so hard with my daughter's disorder. It has

been so hard. You know you raise your children with pride in good grades, all

acomplishments are noticed by grandparents and family. When you deal w/ a

disorder you realize what is important and what isn't. I know that my daughter

is richer in her life than every b/4. Now I just have to hope family and school

will better except her. She wants everyone to know because she fears it could

be so many other kids. At our volleyball meeting which she cried and told them,

another girl popped up and said-I can't even walk to school because if I step on

a crack I have to go home and start over. I never make it to school she said.

We feel we have helped her not feel alone.

One thing that is so hard is my ocd daughter tries to compare with her senior

sister. Her sister always has had 3.98 grade average, in leadership. But

Krysti doesn't realize, she is athletic, cheers, has a grade point averate 3.4

or better. She feels she can never match up.

We never make either feel they should compete. That is what we are working on

now. She has so much to offer!

Smiles for today!! Sharing the smile with you!

Lori from Southern California

W. Birkhan wrote:

> From: " W. Birkhan " <wb4@...>

>

> welcome Lori! (volley4@...)

>

> You have been so successful with moving things along!! Where do you live?

> You are very furtunate to be able to access a cognitive-behavioural

> therapist and what seems to be a very positive school environment!!

>

> I'm sure you will be able to offer us advise on how to communicate with

> the therapist and what its like having a teen with ocd. I have a 16 yo son,

> 14 and 10 yo daughters all with ocd and MDD. I have dysphemia (long term,

> low grade depression), and my husband has MDD and ocd. (yes we've been

> involved in genetic testing!) I know its tough with teens, but you

> certainly sound like your doing a good job!

>

> Meds are usually a matter of trial and error. Most of us have a cupboard

> full of them to prove it! Lately the doc's are augmenting medications to

> deal with the co-morbidity of ocd and other presenting issues. You mention

> anger, I have seen my usually quiet, mature daughter turn into " Ziv the

> Zoloft Monster " - which disappeared after 6 weeks! She is back to herself -

> and coping very well on 200mg/daily.

>

> Welcome again, we look forward to your participation and offering you

> support as needed! Just a reminder that its important to take care of

> yourself. If you collapse, everyone will be in trouble!!

>

> take care, wendy, in canada wb4@...

> ______________________________________________________

> Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com

>

> ---------------------------

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Share on other sites

Kathy,

I do take depression medicine and it does help. Yes I am so interested and

involved in finding out information about ocd etc. Actually this e-mail relaxes

me very much! The job is a seperate issue although at times I bring it home.

The

school district has really worked on this situation. My boss was sent for a 2

week evaluation. He probably will retire after this year. I could have sued

but

I am not like that. I coach volleyball at a different (my fun thing in life)

and

this position and boss allow me to work shorter hours during that 3 months. I

have set a goal to make it till Krysti graduates (2 yrs). Then I will get a

voluntary transfer. See always for my kids and family. I am strong enough to

take care and my boss has backed off considerably. If it becomes blatant, he is

gone!

I know I have been grieving over the little girl I once had. For some reason

lately (since this list and info on ADA, getting therapy and new meds) I have

been

feeling elated and blessed w/ regards to Krysti. Adjusting is the hardest. I

feel once I accomplish something w/ ocd, I take 2 steps backward and have to

begin

that fight all over again. I won't give up I know that. Today is my birthday

and

Krysti thanked me for spending time on the internet getting information about

ocd. She said she feels we can really learn to deal w/ it. I am so proud of

her. She keeps me going, even in her bad episodes.

I had a hysterectomy when she was 2 (14 yrs ago) so I have hormone replacement

to

deal with along w/ stress headaches. I have lived w/ this and it is the least

of

my worries.

This week for some reason I feel I am not being held or loved enough by my

husband. I can't get across to him that I don't want gifts, just hold my hand,

stroke my hair and tell me I am special.

Whats that about? Maybe cause my energy is being spent on getting a handle on

ocd

which benefits our family living.

Thanks for listening from someone who thinks she has a little obsessing in her

too.

Lori

Kathy Hammes wrote:

> From: Kathy Hammes <kathyh@...>

>

> HI Lori:

>

> It is only natural for us to wonder about our own brain problems when we

> learn how these NBDs are so biologically based. I too have scrutinized how

> I function.

>

> It must be very difficult for you to put up with sexual harassment. This

> is illegal and I am very surprised to hear that your employer is advising

> you to have meetings to work things out rather than taking action. They

> are liable as the employer and should protect their own interests and take

> action.

>

> You are describing symptoms of irritability which is often a typical sign

> of depression. Have you been checked out for this? Many of us parents

> have mood and anxiety disorders too and most of us go through a time of

> considerable grief and loss when we are learning to cope with OCD and its

> impact on our families.

>

> Perfectionism is a symptom of many things, not just OCD. Learning

> relaxation skills can be a lifesaver to us. Try something you like, if you

> like to keep busy perhaps it is a family activity with your girls that will

> help you to relax. Some people like yoga, tai chi, meditation, breathing

> exercises, running, needlework, puzzles, whatever can get them to stop the

> eternal committee meeting going on in their head.

>

> always does a good job of reminding us to take care of ourselves and

> enjoy something just for ourselves. This is often done best by having a

> variety of interests rather than putting our whole lives into our kids.

> When they are sick with OCD it is very difficult to achieve this. Good

> luck, take care, aloha, kathy (H)

> kathyh@...

>

> At 07:10 PM 02/19/2000 -0800, you wrote:

> >From: volley4@...

> >

> >I don't think I have ocd like my 16 yr old, but at work I don't like to be

> >interupted by clowning around. I work like a dog all day, hardly

> stopping. I

> >take no breaks but do take a lunch. When my boss looks over my shoulder or

> >keeps walking in my office behind my back for attention I get crazy (I have

> >tried to get him for sexual harassment-but school district just wants to have

> >meetings to work things out. 7 yrs I have put up w/ him. Now knowing

> about my

> >daughter, I don't have the energy anymore. Some day I am going to go off.

> >At home when my husband eats cereal or chips, he crunches forever. I get so

> >annoyed. I mean I have to leave the room. No other noises bother me

> >I am a perfectionist. I must accomplish everything in one day. My head just

> >won't slow down!

> >Dr's on board what do you think! I do have stress headaches!

> >No I can't afford a job change now. I make good money and am so in debt I

> would

> >lose my house and cars and would be paying on them for years.

> >How do I mentally and physically relax and get to a place that is peaceful

> >sometimes during the day. I can't have a pleasant moment. Enjoy the sun,

> >flowers etc. I do enjoy my girls and put my whole life into them.

> >Help

> >Lori

> >

> >W. Birkhan wrote:

> >

> >> From: " W. Birkhan " <wb4@...>

> >>

> >> welcome Lori! (volley4@...)

> >>

> >> You have been so successful with moving things along!! Where do you

> live?

> >> You are very furtunate to be able to access a cognitive-behavioural

> >> therapist and what seems to be a very positive school environment!!

> >>

> >> I'm sure you will be able to offer us advise on how to communicate with

> >> the therapist and what its like having a teen with ocd. I have a 16 yo

> son,

> >> 14 and 10 yo daughters all with ocd and MDD. I have dysphemia (long term,

> >> low grade depression), and my husband has MDD and ocd. (yes we've been

> >> involved in genetic testing!) I know its tough with teens, but you

> >> certainly sound like your doing a good job!

> >>

> >> Meds are usually a matter of trial and error. Most of us have a cupboard

> >> full of them to prove it! Lately the doc's are augmenting medications to

> >> deal with the co-morbidity of ocd and other presenting issues. You mention

> >> anger, I have seen my usually quiet, mature daughter turn into " Ziv the

> >> Zoloft Monster " - which disappeared after 6 weeks! She is back to herself -

> >> and coping very well on 200mg/daily.

> >>

> >> Welcome again, we look forward to your participation and offering you

> >> support as needed! Just a reminder that its important to take care of

> >> yourself. If you collapse, everyone will be in trouble!!

> >>

> >> take care, wendy, in canada wb4@...

> >

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> WANT FREE MAGAZINES?

> Sample over 500 magazines in 30 categories-- all for FREE at

> FreeShop.com, your source for thousands of free and trial offers!

> 1/1610/2/_/_/_/951029448/

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

>

> You may subscribe to the OCD-L by emailing

> listserv@... .

> In the body of your message write:

> subscribe OCD-L your name.

> The archives for the OCD and

> Parenting List may be accessed by going to

> .

> Enter your email address and password.

> Click on the highlighted list name and then click on index.

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Share on other sites

(((LORI))))

Happy Birthday to you!!!!!

mary from La.

volley4@... wrote:

> From: volley4@...

>

> Kathy,

> I do take depression medicine and it does help. Yes I am so interested and

> involved in finding out information about ocd etc. Actually this e-mail

relaxes

> me very much! The job is a seperate issue although at times I bring it home.

The

> school district has really worked on this situation. My boss was sent for a 2

> week evaluation. He probably will retire after this year. I could have sued

but

> I am not like that. I coach volleyball at a different (my fun thing in life)

and

> this position and boss allow me to work shorter hours during that 3 months. I

> have set a goal to make it till Krysti graduates (2 yrs). Then I will get a

> voluntary transfer. See always for my kids and family. I am strong enough

to

> take care and my boss has backed off considerably. If it becomes blatant, he

is

> gone!

> I know I have been grieving over the little girl I once had. For some reason

> lately (since this list and info on ADA, getting therapy and new meds) I have

been

> feeling elated and blessed w/ regards to Krysti. Adjusting is the hardest. I

> feel once I accomplish something w/ ocd, I take 2 steps backward and have to

begin

> that fight all over again. I won't give up I know that. Today is my birthday

and

> Krysti thanked me for spending time on the internet getting information about

> ocd. She said she feels we can really learn to deal w/ it. I am so proud of

> her. She keeps me going, even in her bad episodes.

> I had a hysterectomy when she was 2 (14 yrs ago) so I have hormone replacement

to

> deal with along w/ stress headaches. I have lived w/ this and it is the least

of

> my worries.

> This week for some reason I feel I am not being held or loved enough by my

> husband. I can't get across to him that I don't want gifts, just hold my

hand,

> stroke my hair and tell me I am special.

> Whats that about? Maybe cause my energy is being spent on getting a handle on

ocd

> which benefits our family living.

> Thanks for listening from someone who thinks she has a little obsessing in her

> too.

> Lori

>

> Kathy Hammes wrote:

>

> > From: Kathy Hammes <kathyh@...>

> >

> > HI Lori:

> >

> > It is only natural for us to wonder about our own brain problems when we

> > learn how these NBDs are so biologically based. I too have scrutinized how

> > I function.

> >

> > It must be very difficult for you to put up with sexual harassment. This

> > is illegal and I am very surprised to hear that your employer is advising

> > you to have meetings to work things out rather than taking action. They

> > are liable as the employer and should protect their own interests and take

> > action.

> >

> > You are describing symptoms of irritability which is often a typical sign

> > of depression. Have you been checked out for this? Many of us parents

> > have mood and anxiety disorders too and most of us go through a time of

> > considerable grief and loss when we are learning to cope with OCD and its

> > impact on our families.

> >

> > Perfectionism is a symptom of many things, not just OCD. Learning

> > relaxation skills can be a lifesaver to us. Try something you like, if you

> > like to keep busy perhaps it is a family activity with your girls that will

> > help you to relax. Some people like yoga, tai chi, meditation, breathing

> > exercises, running, needlework, puzzles, whatever can get them to stop the

> > eternal committee meeting going on in their head.

> >

> > always does a good job of reminding us to take care of ourselves and

> > enjoy something just for ourselves. This is often done best by having a

> > variety of interests rather than putting our whole lives into our kids.

> > When they are sick with OCD it is very difficult to achieve this. Good

> > luck, take care, aloha, kathy (H)

> > kathyh@...

> >

> > At 07:10 PM 02/19/2000 -0800, you wrote:

> > >From: volley4@...

> > >

> > >I don't think I have ocd like my 16 yr old, but at work I don't like to be

> > >interupted by clowning around. I work like a dog all day, hardly

> > stopping. I

> > >take no breaks but do take a lunch. When my boss looks over my shoulder or

> > >keeps walking in my office behind my back for attention I get crazy (I have

> > >tried to get him for sexual harassment-but school district just wants to

have

> > >meetings to work things out. 7 yrs I have put up w/ him. Now knowing

> > about my

> > >daughter, I don't have the energy anymore. Some day I am going to go off.

> > >At home when my husband eats cereal or chips, he crunches forever. I get

so

> > >annoyed. I mean I have to leave the room. No other noises bother me

> > >I am a perfectionist. I must accomplish everything in one day. My head

just

> > >won't slow down!

> > >Dr's on board what do you think! I do have stress headaches!

> > >No I can't afford a job change now. I make good money and am so in debt I

> > would

> > >lose my house and cars and would be paying on them for years.

> > >How do I mentally and physically relax and get to a place that is peaceful

> > >sometimes during the day. I can't have a pleasant moment. Enjoy the sun,

> > >flowers etc. I do enjoy my girls and put my whole life into them.

> > >Help

> > >Lori

> > >

> > >W. Birkhan wrote:

> > >

> > >> From: " W. Birkhan " <wb4@...>

> > >>

> > >> welcome Lori! (volley4@...)

> > >>

> > >> You have been so successful with moving things along!! Where do you

> > live?

> > >> You are very furtunate to be able to access a cognitive-behavioural

> > >> therapist and what seems to be a very positive school environment!!

> > >>

> > >> I'm sure you will be able to offer us advise on how to communicate

with

> > >> the therapist and what its like having a teen with ocd. I have a 16 yo

> > son,

> > >> 14 and 10 yo daughters all with ocd and MDD. I have dysphemia (long term,

> > >> low grade depression), and my husband has MDD and ocd. (yes we've been

> > >> involved in genetic testing!) I know its tough with teens, but you

> > >> certainly sound like your doing a good job!

> > >>

> > >> Meds are usually a matter of trial and error. Most of us have a

cupboard

> > >> full of them to prove it! Lately the doc's are augmenting medications to

> > >> deal with the co-morbidity of ocd and other presenting issues. You

mention

> > >> anger, I have seen my usually quiet, mature daughter turn into " Ziv the

> > >> Zoloft Monster " - which disappeared after 6 weeks! She is back to herself

-

> > >> and coping very well on 200mg/daily.

> > >>

> > >> Welcome again, we look forward to your participation and offering you

> > >> support as needed! Just a reminder that its important to take care of

> > >> yourself. If you collapse, everyone will be in trouble!!

> > >>

> > >> take care, wendy, in canada wb4@...

> > >

> >

> > ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> > WANT FREE MAGAZINES?

> > Sample over 500 magazines in 30 categories-- all for FREE at

> > FreeShop.com, your source for thousands of free and trial offers!

> > 1/1610/2/_/_/_/951029448/

> > ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> >

> > You may subscribe to the OCD-L by emailing

> > listserv@... .

> > In the body of your message write:

> > subscribe OCD-L your name.

> > The archives for the OCD and

> > Parenting List may be accessed by going to

> > .

> > Enter your email address and password.

> > Click on the highlighted list name and then click on index.

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Britney? Limp Bizkit? ? Who will win the Grammys???????

> Guess the winners and you could win a FREE MP3 Player! from AWZ.com!

> Click Here!

> 1/1769/2/_/_/_/951030480/

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

>

> You may subscribe to the OCD-L by emailing

> listserv@... .

> In the body of your message write:

> subscribe OCD-L your name.

> The archives for the OCD and

> Parenting List may be accessed by going to

> .

> Enter your email address and password.

> Click on the highlighted list name and then click on index.

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Share on other sites

Thank you!

Stay in touch about your life>

Lori

wrote:

> From: <maryth3@...>

>

> (((LORI))))

>

> Happy Birthday to you!!!!!

>

> mary from La.

>

> volley4@... wrote:

>

> > From: volley4@...

> >

> > Kathy,

> > I do take depression medicine and it does help. Yes I am so interested and

> > involved in finding out information about ocd etc. Actually this e-mail

relaxes

> > me very much! The job is a seperate issue although at times I bring it

home. The

> > school district has really worked on this situation. My boss was sent for a

2

> > week evaluation. He probably will retire after this year. I could have

sued but

> > I am not like that. I coach volleyball at a different (my fun thing in

life) and

> > this position and boss allow me to work shorter hours during that 3 months.

I

> > have set a goal to make it till Krysti graduates (2 yrs). Then I will get a

> > voluntary transfer. See always for my kids and family. I am strong enough

to

> > take care and my boss has backed off considerably. If it becomes blatant,

he is

> > gone!

> > I know I have been grieving over the little girl I once had. For some

reason

> > lately (since this list and info on ADA, getting therapy and new meds) I

have been

> > feeling elated and blessed w/ regards to Krysti. Adjusting is the hardest.

I

> > feel once I accomplish something w/ ocd, I take 2 steps backward and have to

begin

> > that fight all over again. I won't give up I know that. Today is my

birthday and

> > Krysti thanked me for spending time on the internet getting information

about

> > ocd. She said she feels we can really learn to deal w/ it. I am so proud

of

> > her. She keeps me going, even in her bad episodes.

> > I had a hysterectomy when she was 2 (14 yrs ago) so I have hormone

replacement to

> > deal with along w/ stress headaches. I have lived w/ this and it is the

least of

> > my worries.

> > This week for some reason I feel I am not being held or loved enough by my

> > husband. I can't get across to him that I don't want gifts, just hold my

hand,

> > stroke my hair and tell me I am special.

> > Whats that about? Maybe cause my energy is being spent on getting a handle

on ocd

> > which benefits our family living.

> > Thanks for listening from someone who thinks she has a little obsessing in

her

> > too.

> > Lori

> >

> > Kathy Hammes wrote:

> >

> > > From: Kathy Hammes <kathyh@...>

> > >

> > > HI Lori:

> > >

> > > It is only natural for us to wonder about our own brain problems when we

> > > learn how these NBDs are so biologically based. I too have scrutinized

how

> > > I function.

> > >

> > > It must be very difficult for you to put up with sexual harassment. This

> > > is illegal and I am very surprised to hear that your employer is advising

> > > you to have meetings to work things out rather than taking action. They

> > > are liable as the employer and should protect their own interests and take

> > > action.

> > >

> > > You are describing symptoms of irritability which is often a typical sign

> > > of depression. Have you been checked out for this? Many of us parents

> > > have mood and anxiety disorders too and most of us go through a time of

> > > considerable grief and loss when we are learning to cope with OCD and its

> > > impact on our families.

> > >

> > > Perfectionism is a symptom of many things, not just OCD. Learning

> > > relaxation skills can be a lifesaver to us. Try something you like, if

you

> > > like to keep busy perhaps it is a family activity with your girls that

will

> > > help you to relax. Some people like yoga, tai chi, meditation, breathing

> > > exercises, running, needlework, puzzles, whatever can get them to stop the

> > > eternal committee meeting going on in their head.

> > >

> > > always does a good job of reminding us to take care of ourselves and

> > > enjoy something just for ourselves. This is often done best by having a

> > > variety of interests rather than putting our whole lives into our kids.

> > > When they are sick with OCD it is very difficult to achieve this. Good

> > > luck, take care, aloha, kathy (H)

> > > kathyh@...

> > >

> > > At 07:10 PM 02/19/2000 -0800, you wrote:

> > > >From: volley4@...

> > > >

> > > >I don't think I have ocd like my 16 yr old, but at work I don't like to

be

> > > >interupted by clowning around. I work like a dog all day, hardly

> > > stopping. I

> > > >take no breaks but do take a lunch. When my boss looks over my shoulder

or

> > > >keeps walking in my office behind my back for attention I get crazy (I

have

> > > >tried to get him for sexual harassment-but school district just wants to

have

> > > >meetings to work things out. 7 yrs I have put up w/ him. Now knowing

> > > about my

> > > >daughter, I don't have the energy anymore. Some day I am going to go

off.

> > > >At home when my husband eats cereal or chips, he crunches forever. I get

so

> > > >annoyed. I mean I have to leave the room. No other noises bother me

> > > >I am a perfectionist. I must accomplish everything in one day. My head

just

> > > >won't slow down!

> > > >Dr's on board what do you think! I do have stress headaches!

> > > >No I can't afford a job change now. I make good money and am so in debt

I

> > > would

> > > >lose my house and cars and would be paying on them for years.

> > > >How do I mentally and physically relax and get to a place that is

peaceful

> > > >sometimes during the day. I can't have a pleasant moment. Enjoy the

sun,

> > > >flowers etc. I do enjoy my girls and put my whole life into them.

> > > >Help

> > > >Lori

> > > >

> > > >W. Birkhan wrote:

> > > >

> > > >> From: " W. Birkhan " <wb4@...>

> > > >>

> > > >> welcome Lori! (volley4@...)

> > > >>

> > > >> You have been so successful with moving things along!! Where do you

> > > live?

> > > >> You are very furtunate to be able to access a cognitive-behavioural

> > > >> therapist and what seems to be a very positive school environment!!

> > > >>

> > > >> I'm sure you will be able to offer us advise on how to communicate

with

> > > >> the therapist and what its like having a teen with ocd. I have a 16 yo

> > > son,

> > > >> 14 and 10 yo daughters all with ocd and MDD. I have dysphemia (long

term,

> > > >> low grade depression), and my husband has MDD and ocd. (yes we've been

> > > >> involved in genetic testing!) I know its tough with teens, but you

> > > >> certainly sound like your doing a good job!

> > > >>

> > > >> Meds are usually a matter of trial and error. Most of us have a

cupboard

> > > >> full of them to prove it! Lately the doc's are augmenting medications

to

> > > >> deal with the co-morbidity of ocd and other presenting issues. You

mention

> > > >> anger, I have seen my usually quiet, mature daughter turn into " Ziv the

> > > >> Zoloft Monster " - which disappeared after 6 weeks! She is back to

herself -

> > > >> and coping very well on 200mg/daily.

> > > >>

> > > >> Welcome again, we look forward to your participation and offering you

> > > >> support as needed! Just a reminder that its important to take care of

> > > >> yourself. If you collapse, everyone will be in trouble!!

> > > >>

> > > >> take care, wendy, in canada wb4@...

> > > >

> > >

> > > ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> > > WANT FREE MAGAZINES?

> > > Sample over 500 magazines in 30 categories-- all for FREE at

> > > FreeShop.com, your source for thousands of free and trial offers!

> > > 1/1610/2/_/_/_/951029448/

> > > ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> > >

> > > You may subscribe to the OCD-L by emailing

> > > listserv@... .

> > > In the body of your message write:

> > > subscribe OCD-L your name.

> > > The archives for the OCD and

> > > Parenting List may be accessed by going to

> > > .

> > > Enter your email address and password.

> > > Click on the highlighted list name and then click on index.

> >

> > ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> > Britney? Limp Bizkit? ? Who will win the Grammys???????

> > Guess the winners and you could win a FREE MP3 Player! from AWZ.com!

> > Click Here!

> > 1/1769/2/_/_/_/951030480/

> > ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> >

> > You may subscribe to the OCD-L by emailing

> > listserv@... .

> > In the body of your message write:

> > subscribe OCD-L your name.

> > The archives for the OCD and

> > Parenting List may be accessed by going to

> > .

> > Enter your email address and password.

> > Click on the highlighted list name and then click on index.

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Get your money connected @ OnMoney.com - the first Web site that lets you

> see, consolidate, and manage all of your finances all in one place.

> 1/1636/2/_/_/_/951068400/

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

>

> You may subscribe to the OCD-L by emailing

> listserv@... .

> In the body of your message write:

> subscribe OCD-L your name.

> The archives for the OCD and

> Parenting List may be accessed by going to

> .

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I'm sure you don't have OCD like your 16 year old. No one's OCD is like

anyone else's. But you probably have your very own version of OCD and

could really use some help about now with all this stress. Stress makes

anyone's OCD worse. Did you say you are already seeing a doctor about

your problems? Are you on medication? It is so important for you to

get the help you need--not only for yourself but for your family who

depend on you.

I have finally started getting some therapy for myself and have gotten

on medication. It is so much better for me and for my family when I am

being cared for also. I will say a prayer for you and hope that you get

some relief.

Judy

volley4@... wrote:

>

> From: volley4@...

>

> I don't think I have ocd like my 16 yr old, but at work I don't like

> to be

> interupted by clowning around. I work like a dog all day, hardly

> stopping. I

> take no breaks but do take a lunch. When my boss looks over my

> shoulder or

> keeps walking in my office behind my back for attention I get crazy (I

> have

> tried to get him for sexual harassment-but school district just wants

> to have

> meetings to work things out. 7 yrs I have put up w/ him. Now knowing

> about my

> daughter, I don't have the energy anymore. Some day I am going to go

> off.

> At home when my husband eats cereal or chips, he crunches forever. I

> get so

> annoyed. I mean I have to leave the room. No other noises bother me

> I am a perfectionist. I must accomplish everything in one day. My

> head just

> won't slow down!

> Dr's on board what do you think! I do have stress headaches!

> No I can't afford a job change now. I make good money and am so in

> debt I would

> lose my house and cars and would be paying on them for years.

> How do I mentally and physically relax and get to a place that is

> peaceful

> sometimes during the day. I can't have a pleasant moment. Enjoy the

> sun,

> flowers etc. I do enjoy my girls and put my whole life into them.

> Help

> Lori

>

> W. Birkhan wrote:

>

> > From: " W. Birkhan " <wb4@...>

> >

> > welcome Lori! (volley4@...)

> >

> > You have been so successful with moving things along!! Where do

> you live?

> > You are very furtunate to be able to access a cognitive-behavioural

> > therapist and what seems to be a very positive school environment!!

> >

> > I'm sure you will be able to offer us advise on how to

> communicate with

> > the therapist and what its like having a teen with ocd. I have a 16

> yo son,

> > 14 and 10 yo daughters all with ocd and MDD. I have dysphemia (long

> term,

> > low grade depression), and my husband has MDD and ocd. (yes we've

> been

> > involved in genetic testing!) I know its tough with teens, but you

> > certainly sound like your doing a good job!

> >

> > Meds are usually a matter of trial and error. Most of us have a

> cupboard

> > full of them to prove it! Lately the doc's are augmenting

> medications to

> > deal with the co-morbidity of ocd and other presenting issues. You

> mention

> > anger, I have seen my usually quiet, mature daughter turn into " Ziv

> the

> > Zoloft Monster " - which disappeared after 6 weeks! She is back to

> herself -

> > and coping very well on 200mg/daily.

> >

> > Welcome again, we look forward to your participation and offering

> you

> > support as needed! Just a reminder that its important to take care

> of

> > yourself. If you collapse, everyone will be in trouble!!

> >

> > take care, wendy, in canada wb4@...

> > ______________________________________________________

> > Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com

> >

> > ---------------------------

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Kathy, You are my inspiration! I have only been on this list for 1 week if

that.

Thanks for all the suggestions and thoughts about me. I do not have ocd (at

least

not been diagnosed) and you are there for me emotinally!

Great friend to have as no one here seems to want to here about Krysti. Guess

they can't understand.

That is one of my great frusrations! Family and friends thinking that ocd is

not

real, and that it is an excuse for a lot of misbehavior. I usually don't have

anyone to talk to. It is nice here!

Lori

Kathy Hammes wrote:

> From: Kathy Hammes <kathyh@...>

>

> HI Lori:

>

> It is only natural for us to wonder about our own brain problems when we

> learn how these NBDs are so biologically based. I too have scrutinized how

> I function.

>

> It must be very difficult for you to put up with sexual harassment. This

> is illegal and I am very surprised to hear that your employer is advising

> you to have meetings to work things out rather than taking action. They

> are liable as the employer and should protect their own interests and take

> action.

>

> You are describing symptoms of irritability which is often a typical sign

> of depression. Have you been checked out for this? Many of us parents

> have mood and anxiety disorders too and most of us go through a time of

> considerable grief and loss when we are learning to cope with OCD and its

> impact on our families.

>

> Perfectionism is a symptom of many things, not just OCD. Learning

> relaxation skills can be a lifesaver to us. Try something you like, if you

> like to keep busy perhaps it is a family activity with your girls that will

> help you to relax. Some people like yoga, tai chi, meditation, breathing

> exercises, running, needlework, puzzles, whatever can get them to stop the

> eternal committee meeting going on in their head.

>

> always does a good job of reminding us to take care of ourselves and

> enjoy something just for ourselves. This is often done best by having a

> variety of interests rather than putting our whole lives into our kids.

> When they are sick with OCD it is very difficult to achieve this. Good

> luck, take care, aloha, kathy (H)

> kathyh@...

>

> At 07:10 PM 02/19/2000 -0800, you wrote:

> >From: volley4@...

> >

> >I don't think I have ocd like my 16 yr old, but at work I don't like to be

> >interupted by clowning around. I work like a dog all day, hardly

> stopping. I

> >take no breaks but do take a lunch. When my boss looks over my shoulder or

> >keeps walking in my office behind my back for attention I get crazy (I have

> >tried to get him for sexual harassment-but school district just wants to have

> >meetings to work things out. 7 yrs I have put up w/ him. Now knowing

> about my

> >daughter, I don't have the energy anymore. Some day I am going to go off.

> >At home when my husband eats cereal or chips, he crunches forever. I get so

> >annoyed. I mean I have to leave the room. No other noises bother me

> >I am a perfectionist. I must accomplish everything in one day. My head just

> >won't slow down!

> >Dr's on board what do you think! I do have stress headaches!

> >No I can't afford a job change now. I make good money and am so in debt I

> would

> >lose my house and cars and would be paying on them for years.

> >How do I mentally and physically relax and get to a place that is peaceful

> >sometimes during the day. I can't have a pleasant moment. Enjoy the sun,

> >flowers etc. I do enjoy my girls and put my whole life into them.

> >Help

> >Lori

> >

> >W. Birkhan wrote:

> >

> >> From: " W. Birkhan " <wb4@...>

> >>

> >> welcome Lori! (volley4@...)

> >>

> >> You have been so successful with moving things along!! Where do you

> live?

> >> You are very furtunate to be able to access a cognitive-behavioural

> >> therapist and what seems to be a very positive school environment!!

> >>

> >> I'm sure you will be able to offer us advise on how to communicate with

> >> the therapist and what its like having a teen with ocd. I have a 16 yo

> son,

> >> 14 and 10 yo daughters all with ocd and MDD. I have dysphemia (long term,

> >> low grade depression), and my husband has MDD and ocd. (yes we've been

> >> involved in genetic testing!) I know its tough with teens, but you

> >> certainly sound like your doing a good job!

> >>

> >> Meds are usually a matter of trial and error. Most of us have a cupboard

> >> full of them to prove it! Lately the doc's are augmenting medications to

> >> deal with the co-morbidity of ocd and other presenting issues. You mention

> >> anger, I have seen my usually quiet, mature daughter turn into " Ziv the

> >> Zoloft Monster " - which disappeared after 6 weeks! She is back to herself -

> >> and coping very well on 200mg/daily.

> >>

> >> Welcome again, we look forward to your participation and offering you

> >> support as needed! Just a reminder that its important to take care of

> >> yourself. If you collapse, everyone will be in trouble!!

> >>

> >> take care, wendy, in canada wb4@...

> >

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

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> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

>

> You may subscribe to the OCD-L by emailing

> listserv@... .

> In the body of your message write:

> subscribe OCD-L your name.

> The archives for the OCD and

> Parenting List may be accessed by going to

> .

> Enter your email address and password.

> Click on the highlighted list name and then click on index.

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Hi Lori:

Thanks for your kind words.

We also found that most people normalize Steve's OCD behavior as being

things they do too. Even teachers have done this, but I think it was just

that they were in denial about what happened to him. Several of them have

told me they never see any of the behaviors we have described in our 504

meetings. I think that society really likes to think of kids as perfect,

untouched little things and that kids have problems really is just too

confusing and overwhelming to most people.

On Friday Steve had a very hard time with one well-meaning(??) family

friend who started telling him his OCD was caused by MSG in the Ramen

noodles he likes to eat. She has told me that she does not believe in the

existence of mental illness and that all Steve's problems are the result of

our being too indulgent as parents. This is inspite of her observing major

meltdowns from OCD on more than one occasion. That denial and rigid

thinking are tough to deal with and doesn't exactly give us an opportunity

to share our concerns in a meaningful way with a friend who thinks like

this. It is however a very good lesson for Steve that he is not the only

person alive who is hampered by problems with the way they think and

approach problems.

I too enjoy writing to the list where people know what I am talking about

and that I am not exaggerating about our difficulties with Steve. These

are thankfully much, much, much reduced due to the wonderful results from CBT.

Good luck, keep posting, take care, aloha, kathy (H)

kathyh@...

At 11:19 AM 02/20/2000 -0800, you wrote:

>From: volley4@...

>

>Kathy, You are my inspiration! I have only been on this list for 1 week

if that.

>Thanks for all the suggestions and thoughts about me. I do not have ocd

(at least

>not been diagnosed) and you are there for me emotinally!

>Great friend to have as no one here seems to want to here about Krysti.

Guess

>they can't understand.

>That is one of my great frusrations! Family and friends thinking that ocd

is not

>real, and that it is an excuse for a lot of misbehavior. I usually don't

have

>anyone to talk to. It is nice here!

>Lori

>

>Kathy Hammes wrote:

>

>> From: Kathy Hammes <kathyh@...>

>>

>> HI Lori:

>>

>> It is only natural for us to wonder about our own brain problems when we

>> learn how these NBDs are so biologically based. I too have scrutinized how

>> I function.

>>

>> It must be very difficult for you to put up with sexual harassment. This

>> is illegal and I am very surprised to hear that your employer is advising

>> you to have meetings to work things out rather than taking action. They

>> are liable as the employer and should protect their own interests and take

>> action.

>>

>> You are describing symptoms of irritability which is often a typical sign

>> of depression. Have you been checked out for this? Many of us parents

>> have mood and anxiety disorders too and most of us go through a time of

>> considerable grief and loss when we are learning to cope with OCD and its

>> impact on our families.

>>

>> Perfectionism is a symptom of many things, not just OCD. Learning

>> relaxation skills can be a lifesaver to us. Try something you like, if you

>> like to keep busy perhaps it is a family activity with your girls that will

>> help you to relax. Some people like yoga, tai chi, meditation, breathing

>> exercises, running, needlework, puzzles, whatever can get them to stop the

>> eternal committee meeting going on in their head.

>>

>> always does a good job of reminding us to take care of ourselves and

>> enjoy something just for ourselves. This is often done best by having a

>> variety of interests rather than putting our whole lives into our kids.

>> When they are sick with OCD it is very difficult to achieve this. Good

>> luck, take care, aloha, kathy (H)

>> kathyh@...

>>

>> At 07:10 PM 02/19/2000 -0800, you wrote:

>> >From: volley4@...

>> >

>> >I don't think I have ocd like my 16 yr old, but at work I don't like to be

>> >interupted by clowning around. I work like a dog all day, hardly

>> stopping. I

>> >take no breaks but do take a lunch. When my boss looks over my

shoulder or

>> >keeps walking in my office behind my back for attention I get crazy (I

have

>> >tried to get him for sexual harassment-but school district just wants

to have

>> >meetings to work things out. 7 yrs I have put up w/ him. Now knowing

>> about my

>> >daughter, I don't have the energy anymore. Some day I am going to go off.

>> >At home when my husband eats cereal or chips, he crunches forever. I

get so

>> >annoyed. I mean I have to leave the room. No other noises bother me

>> >I am a perfectionist. I must accomplish everything in one day. My

head just

>> >won't slow down!

>> >Dr's on board what do you think! I do have stress headaches!

>> >No I can't afford a job change now. I make good money and am so in debt I

>> would

>> >lose my house and cars and would be paying on them for years.

>> >How do I mentally and physically relax and get to a place that is peaceful

>> >sometimes during the day. I can't have a pleasant moment. Enjoy the sun,

>> >flowers etc. I do enjoy my girls and put my whole life into them.

>> >Help

>> >Lori

>> >

>> >W. Birkhan wrote:

>> >

>> >> From: " W. Birkhan " <wb4@...>

>> >>

>> >> welcome Lori! (volley4@...)

>> >>

>> >> You have been so successful with moving things along!! Where do you

>> live?

>> >> You are very furtunate to be able to access a cognitive-behavioural

>> >> therapist and what seems to be a very positive school environment!!

>> >>

>> >> I'm sure you will be able to offer us advise on how to communicate

with

>> >> the therapist and what its like having a teen with ocd. I have a 16 yo

>> son,

>> >> 14 and 10 yo daughters all with ocd and MDD. I have dysphemia (long

term,

>> >> low grade depression), and my husband has MDD and ocd. (yes we've been

>> >> involved in genetic testing!) I know its tough with teens, but you

>> >> certainly sound like your doing a good job!

>> >>

>> >> Meds are usually a matter of trial and error. Most of us have a

cupboard

>> >> full of them to prove it! Lately the doc's are augmenting medications to

>> >> deal with the co-morbidity of ocd and other presenting issues. You

mention

>> >> anger, I have seen my usually quiet, mature daughter turn into " Ziv the

>> >> Zoloft Monster " - which disappeared after 6 weeks! She is back to

herself -

>> >> and coping very well on 200mg/daily.

>> >>

>> >> Welcome again, we look forward to your participation and offering you

>> >> support as needed! Just a reminder that its important to take care of

>> >> yourself. If you collapse, everyone will be in trouble!!

>> >>

>> >> take care, wendy, in canada wb4@...

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Share on other sites

Top Ramen! That is so typical of some family members. You know this disorder

has

helped me also not catagorize people or think twice about commenting! I am so

much more loving and caring when I coach young girls. Some hear things

different,

some resond different. I have learned to except ways in which some handle

stressfull game situations. I have grown to love our society more and look at

each individuals offering.

Smiles to Kathy

Lori

Kathy Hammes wrote:

> From: Kathy Hammes <kathyh@...>

>

> Hi Lori:

>

> Thanks for your kind words.

>

> We also found that most people normalize Steve's OCD behavior as being

> things they do too. Even teachers have done this, but I think it was just

> that they were in denial about what happened to him. Several of them have

> told me they never see any of the behaviors we have described in our 504

> meetings. I think that society really likes to think of kids as perfect,

> untouched little things and that kids have problems really is just too

> confusing and overwhelming to most people.

>

> On Friday Steve had a very hard time with one well-meaning(??) family

> friend who started telling him his OCD was caused by MSG in the Ramen

> noodles he likes to eat. She has told me that she does not believe in the

> existence of mental illness and that all Steve's problems are the result of

> our being too indulgent as parents. This is inspite of her observing major

> meltdowns from OCD on more than one occasion. That denial and rigid

> thinking are tough to deal with and doesn't exactly give us an opportunity

> to share our concerns in a meaningful way with a friend who thinks like

> this. It is however a very good lesson for Steve that he is not the only

> person alive who is hampered by problems with the way they think and

> approach problems.

>

> I too enjoy writing to the list where people know what I am talking about

> and that I am not exaggerating about our difficulties with Steve. These

> are thankfully much, much, much reduced due to the wonderful results from CBT.

>

> Good luck, keep posting, take care, aloha, kathy (H)

> kathyh@...

>

> At 11:19 AM 02/20/2000 -0800, you wrote:

> >From: volley4@...

> >

> >Kathy, You are my inspiration! I have only been on this list for 1 week

> if that.

> >Thanks for all the suggestions and thoughts about me. I do not have ocd

> (at least

> >not been diagnosed) and you are there for me emotinally!

> >Great friend to have as no one here seems to want to here about Krysti.

> Guess

> >they can't understand.

> >That is one of my great frusrations! Family and friends thinking that ocd

> is not

> >real, and that it is an excuse for a lot of misbehavior. I usually don't

> have

> >anyone to talk to. It is nice here!

> >Lori

> >

> >Kathy Hammes wrote:

> >

> >> From: Kathy Hammes <kathyh@...>

> >>

> >> HI Lori:

> >>

> >> It is only natural for us to wonder about our own brain problems when we

> >> learn how these NBDs are so biologically based. I too have scrutinized how

> >> I function.

> >>

> >> It must be very difficult for you to put up with sexual harassment. This

> >> is illegal and I am very surprised to hear that your employer is advising

> >> you to have meetings to work things out rather than taking action. They

> >> are liable as the employer and should protect their own interests and take

> >> action.

> >>

> >> You are describing symptoms of irritability which is often a typical sign

> >> of depression. Have you been checked out for this? Many of us parents

> >> have mood and anxiety disorders too and most of us go through a time of

> >> considerable grief and loss when we are learning to cope with OCD and its

> >> impact on our families.

> >>

> >> Perfectionism is a symptom of many things, not just OCD. Learning

> >> relaxation skills can be a lifesaver to us. Try something you like, if you

> >> like to keep busy perhaps it is a family activity with your girls that will

> >> help you to relax. Some people like yoga, tai chi, meditation, breathing

> >> exercises, running, needlework, puzzles, whatever can get them to stop the

> >> eternal committee meeting going on in their head.

> >>

> >> always does a good job of reminding us to take care of ourselves and

> >> enjoy something just for ourselves. This is often done best by having a

> >> variety of interests rather than putting our whole lives into our kids.

> >> When they are sick with OCD it is very difficult to achieve this. Good

> >> luck, take care, aloha, kathy (H)

> >> kathyh@...

> >>

> >> At 07:10 PM 02/19/2000 -0800, you wrote:

> >> >From: volley4@...

> >> >

> >> >I don't think I have ocd like my 16 yr old, but at work I don't like to be

> >> >interupted by clowning around. I work like a dog all day, hardly

> >> stopping. I

> >> >take no breaks but do take a lunch. When my boss looks over my

> shoulder or

> >> >keeps walking in my office behind my back for attention I get crazy (I

> have

> >> >tried to get him for sexual harassment-but school district just wants

> to have

> >> >meetings to work things out. 7 yrs I have put up w/ him. Now knowing

> >> about my

> >> >daughter, I don't have the energy anymore. Some day I am going to go off.

> >> >At home when my husband eats cereal or chips, he crunches forever. I

> get so

> >> >annoyed. I mean I have to leave the room. No other noises bother me

> >> >I am a perfectionist. I must accomplish everything in one day. My

> head just

> >> >won't slow down!

> >> >Dr's on board what do you think! I do have stress headaches!

> >> >No I can't afford a job change now. I make good money and am so in debt I

> >> would

> >> >lose my house and cars and would be paying on them for years.

> >> >How do I mentally and physically relax and get to a place that is peaceful

> >> >sometimes during the day. I can't have a pleasant moment. Enjoy the sun,

> >> >flowers etc. I do enjoy my girls and put my whole life into them.

> >> >Help

> >> >Lori

> >> >

> >> >W. Birkhan wrote:

> >> >

> >> >> From: " W. Birkhan " <wb4@...>

> >> >>

> >> >> welcome Lori! (volley4@...)

> >> >>

> >> >> You have been so successful with moving things along!! Where do you

> >> live?

> >> >> You are very furtunate to be able to access a cognitive-behavioural

> >> >> therapist and what seems to be a very positive school environment!!

> >> >>

> >> >> I'm sure you will be able to offer us advise on how to communicate

> with

> >> >> the therapist and what its like having a teen with ocd. I have a 16 yo

> >> son,

> >> >> 14 and 10 yo daughters all with ocd and MDD. I have dysphemia (long

> term,

> >> >> low grade depression), and my husband has MDD and ocd. (yes we've been

> >> >> involved in genetic testing!) I know its tough with teens, but you

> >> >> certainly sound like your doing a good job!

> >> >>

> >> >> Meds are usually a matter of trial and error. Most of us have a

> cupboard

> >> >> full of them to prove it! Lately the doc's are augmenting medications to

> >> >> deal with the co-morbidity of ocd and other presenting issues. You

> mention

> >> >> anger, I have seen my usually quiet, mature daughter turn into " Ziv the

> >> >> Zoloft Monster " - which disappeared after 6 weeks! She is back to

> herself -

> >> >> and coping very well on 200mg/daily.

> >> >>

> >> >> Welcome again, we look forward to your participation and offering you

> >> >> support as needed! Just a reminder that its important to take care of

> >> >> yourself. If you collapse, everyone will be in trouble!!

> >> >>

> >> >> take care, wendy, in canada wb4@...

>

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> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

>

> You may subscribe to the OCD-L by emailing

> listserv@... .

> In the body of your message write:

> subscribe OCD-L your name.

> The archives for the OCD and

> Parenting List may be accessed by going to

> .

> Enter your email address and password.

> Click on the highlighted list name and then click on index.

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