Re: Re: what I see now days

January 23, 2006

Thtas true. My other half of nine years had the police remove me from his

home as he couldnt stand me sick and crazy so he says anymore.

January 23, 2006

Thanks, I don't know what I would do without him!!!!!!!!

At least your husband is on your side.....

not all husbands are like that.

January 23, 2006

Other than this group you can count your friends on one hand and have a lot

left over!!!!!! Some people are polite and ask how you are but when you try

explain the illness they just shut down!!They don't EVEN TRY to understand It

just makes me want to scream!!!!!!

Sue

Dr D, who is doing fine now, tells me being fired not only helped get

her out of that bad place quicker, but it also opened her eyes about

the true nature of people she thought were her friends.

January 23, 2006

Serena, Everything you said is so very true. I'll try to use some of what

you said to the next eye roller I meet!!

Sue

found that the best thing for me to do in social or business situations is

to use the proper name for the illness. If I say I got sick from toxic mold,

or say CFS or fibromylagia or SBS, I get the pleasure of dealing with

responses ranging from, " That's just a phoney illness, " (true story!) to " I

don't

believe in that " (huh?) to " Yeah, I'm tired, too " (bet me!) to the ever-so

subtle Rolling of the Eyes (subtle like you tossed a stink bomb into the room,

that is). So, people are rude and sometimes mean. I can't change that.om

writes:

January 23, 2006

I've found that the best thing for me to do in social or business situations is

to use the proper name for the illness. If I say I got sick from toxic mold, or

say CFS or fibromylagia or SBS, I get the pleasure of dealing with responses

ranging from, " That's just a phoney illness, " (true story!) to " I don't believe

in that " (huh?) to " Yeah, I'm tired, too " (bet me!) to the ever-so subtle

Rolling of the Eyes (subtle like you tossed a stink bomb into the room, that

is). So, people are rude and sometimes mean. I can't change that.

OTOH, if I say matter-of factly, " I have mycotoxicosis. There's no cure, but

I'm fighting hard and doing the best I can. Don't worry, it's a genetic thing

and it's not at all contagious. " The whole social landscape changes. The

uninvited judgement and commentary disappears, because the listener hasn't got a

clue what I'm talking about. Some people will change the subject rather than

risking hearing about something as complicated and nasty-sounding as

" mycotoxicosis " . Some people will ask what that is, and I'll give them only an

ultra-brief description and stop right there unless more questions are asked. If

any doubt is expressed (hardly ever) I just tell them they can google it or I

can give them my doctor's number. I'm not snappish about it, but I'm not taking

any bull, either. I didn't become a less worthy human being when I got sick.

I think I've finally reached a point where I don't feel like I owe any

explanations to anyone at all. I didn't ask for this, and I don't have to

justify it. This illness makes us reach deep and find out some things about

ourselves. On the flip side, it also shows us some things about other people we

might rather not have known - especially when it comes to friends and loved

ones. That hurts, no getting around it. There isn't any cutesy silver lining in

all this that makes that hurt worthwhile. But we can acquire new strengths along

the way, and I think for me, the best place to start was to stop trying to

justify myself in the eyes of others. No great wisdom there - I finally quit

doing from sheer exhaustion. For what I spent energy-wise on this or that

blockhead, I could have gotten food or maybe even some clean laundry. Barring

dealing with the courts or the insurers, I'm not obligated to go places that are

bad for me, eat things I can't digest, attend events that put me in

situations that are bad for me, or interact with people who are even more toxic

than the mold is. So I don't. I don't have to defend or explain. I don't have

time or energy to clean up other people's messes or have those kinds of

conversations that are supposedly about one thing, but are really about

something else entirely (all married people have had these - you know the

drill). So in that sense, I've finally found some new strength out of all the

physical weakness.

Anyway, that's what's working for me right now. Hope it's of some use. Take

care out there!

Serena

There is no such thing as an anomaly. Recheck your original premise.

...Ayn Rand,

paraphrased

---------------------------------

What are the most popular cars? Find out at Autos

January 23, 2006

That is just wrong..........don't worry, I believe in Karma...it will come back

to him. That is just SAD!!!!! I am sorry that happened to you.

Sincerely,

Marcie

Gingersnap1964@... wrote:

Thtas true. My other half of nine years had the police remove me from his

home as he couldnt stand me sick and crazy so he says anymore.

January 23, 2006

Serena,

I am sitting in the library reading your post and crying like a baby. You are

fantastic with words. It is what I want to say but my brain does not work as

well as yours right now. THANK YOU.......THANK YOU......THANK YOU!!!!!

Marcie

SERENA EDWARDS <pushcrash@...> wrote:

I've found that the best thing for me to do in social or business situations

is to use the proper name for the illness. If I say I got sick from toxic mold,

or say CFS or fibromylagia or SBS, I get the pleasure of dealing with responses