Re: 2 1/2 screaming allot in public

[Guest guest]

Well, at 2.5, I'd guess toddler :-( Not that you can chalk everything

up to the " terrible twos " but there are some characteristics that have

led to this stereotype........ Our daughter with DS had sensory issues

with loud noises, which caused her distress, but these would show

equally at home and out, not just one place or the other. Do you think

that your daughter is expressing fear of/discomfort new people when she

screams in public? What is your gut, is she trying to communicate some

problem to you? My guess is that if it's just an irritating behavior

stage, it will pass before you figure it out.... that is a hallmark of

parenting all kinds of kids! You finally figure out how to deal with

something, and they stop doing it and move on to something else!

You have hit on one of the most challenging things about having a child

with a disability... knowing if the behavior is typical kid behavior, or

if it is because or/related to the disability, or a combination of the

two. I think what it comes down to is that you handle things in a way

that is appropriate for your child developmentally, no matter what is

causing a behavior, and be consistent.

I would assume that she's going to do this when going out, so be

prepared with different choices.... maybe she wants " her " noise, so how

about a favorite one of those books that you push buttons and it plays

music or sounds? I am not an advocate of pushing food at kids all the

time, but a little baggie of cheerios or gold fish crackers might keep

her distracted long enough to get your shopping done in peace? Like I

said before, stages don't last forever, so you do your best to deal with

them... if it's successful snacking while shopping, great, it's not like

you will have to give her a snack every time you leave the house for the

rest of her life... in fact, she'll let you know when it's time to stop

snacking while shopping because she'll start throwing the snacks..........

Wish I could be more helpful... as you can see, I've moved away from

toddler behavior and now live with three teen/tween daughters... whole

different ball game :-)

Good luck,

, mom to (16), (13 DS) and (12)

On 10/25/2011 9:25 AM, Alisonc wrote:

>

> Hi

>

> I would love any advice on how to handle my 2.5 year old screaming

> allot when we go in public. She is good when she is home with my

> husband and myself, but as soon as allot of people get around or in

> public. She yells allot. It is not the crying screaming in is the loud

> hey look at me and get attention screaming. She can speak about 2o

> words and does sign language, so she is able to communicate. We

> usually take her out of the store if there is two of us, and if there

> is only one than we will try to distract her with where is your eyes,

> or nose game.... This is my first child so I am not sure if this is a

> characterstic of down syndrome or a toddler.

>

> Thanks

> Ali

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi

Thank You so much for the advice! I was wondering about the sounds bothering or

fear but when someone passes us in the aisle she stops screaming long enough to

wave and say hi in this faux southern voice she has developed, and right back to

screaming. Great idea on taking the snacks. It does not bother me, I hate " the

looks " people give her

Have a great day

From: Kerrigan [mailto:leslie-kerrigan@...]

Sent: Tuesday, October 25, 2011 12:48 PM

Torrey, Alison

Cc:

Subject: Re: 2 1/2 screaming allot in public

Well, at 2.5, I'd guess toddler :-( Not that you can chalk everything up to the

" terrible twos " but there are some characteristics that have led to this

stereotype........ Our daughter with DS had sensory issues with loud noises,

which caused her distress, but these would show equally at home and out, not

just one place or the other. Do you think that your daughter is expressing fear

of/discomfort new people when she screams in public? What is your gut, is she

trying to communicate some problem to you? My guess is that if it's just an

irritating behavior stage, it will pass before you figure it out.... that is a

hallmark of parenting all kinds of kids! You finally figure out how to deal

with something, and they stop doing it and move on to something else!

You have hit on one of the most challenging things about having a child with a

disability... knowing if the behavior is typical kid behavior, or if it is

because or/related to the disability, or a combination of the two. I think what

it comes down to is that you handle things in a way that is appropriate for your

child developmentally, no matter what is causing a behavior, and be consistent.

I would assume that she's going to do this when going out, so be prepared with

different choices.... maybe she wants " her " noise, so how about a favorite one

of those books that you push buttons and it plays music or sounds? I am not an

advocate of pushing food at kids all the time, but a little baggie of cheerios

or gold fish crackers might keep her distracted long enough to get your shopping

done in peace? Like I said before, stages don't last forever, so you do your

best to deal with them... if it's successful snacking while shopping, great,

it's not like you will have to give her a snack every time you leave the house

for the rest of her life... in fact, she'll let you know when it's time to stop

snacking while shopping because she'll start throwing the snacks..........

Wish I could be more helpful... as you can see, I've moved away from toddler

behavior and now live with three teen/tween daughters... whole different ball

game :-)

Good luck,

, mom to (16), (13 DS) and (12)

On 10/25/2011 9:25 AM, Alisonc wrote:

Hi

I would love any advice on how to handle my 2.5 year old screaming allot when we

go in public. She is good when she is home with my husband and myself, but as

soon as allot of people get around or in public. She yells allot. It is not the

crying screaming in is the loud hey look at me and get attention screaming. She

can speak about 2o words and does sign language, so she is able to communicate.

We usually take her out of the store if there is two of us, and if there is only

one than we will try to distract her with where is your eyes, or nose game....

This is my first child so I am not sure if this is a characterstic of down

syndrome or a toddler.

Thanks

Ali

[Guest guest]

I have to admit when was that age I did my grocery shopping at lunch

time. He would sit in the cart and eat his special treat, Mcd's happy meal,

while I shopped. It gave him something special and me the time to look at what

was on the shelves without the reaching, pulling, touching, vocalizing when he

didn't get his way. We also went thru the stage where he just wanted attention

and would scream when he saw someone coming our way. I learned to not pay

attention to others and let him scream until he realized he wasn't getting his

way. He's 13 now and every now and then he tries to be a " baby " and whine in the

store and I just keep moving and he realizes I won't feed into it and stops and

apologizes.

Marcia Freeman

leslie-kerrigan@...

CC:

From: Alison.Torrey@...

Date: Tue, 25 Oct 2011 13:09:29 -0400

Subject: RE: 2 1/2 screaming allot in public

Hi

Thank You so much for the advice! I was wondering about the sounds bothering or

fear but when someone passes us in the aisle she stops screaming long enough to

wave and say hi in this faux southern voice she has developed, and right back to

screaming. Great idea on taking the snacks. It does not bother me, I hate " the

looks " people give her

Have a great day

From: Kerrigan [mailto:leslie-kerrigan@...]

Sent: Tuesday, October 25, 2011 12:48 PM

Torrey, Alison

Cc:

Subject: Re: 2 1/2 screaming allot in public

Well, at 2.5, I'd guess toddler :-( Not that you can chalk everything up to the

" terrible twos " but there are some characteristics that have led to this

stereotype........ Our daughter with DS had sensory issues with loud noises,

which caused her distress, but these would show equally at home and out, not

just one place or the other. Do you think that your daughter is expressing fear

of/discomfort new people when she screams in public? What is your gut, is she

trying to communicate some problem to you? My guess is that if it's just an

irritating behavior stage, it will pass before you figure it out.... that is a

hallmark of parenting all kinds of kids! You finally figure out how to deal with

something, and they stop doing it and move on to something else!

You have hit on one of the most challenging things about having a child with a

disability... knowing if the behavior is typical kid behavior, or if it is

because or/related to the disability, or a combination of the two. I think what

it comes down to is that you handle things in a way that is appropriate for your

child developmentally, no matter what is causing a behavior, and be consistent.

I would assume that she's going to do this when going out, so be prepared with

different choices.... maybe she wants " her " noise, so how about a favorite one

of those books that you push buttons and it plays music or sounds? I am not an

advocate of pushing food at kids all the time, but a little baggie of cheerios

or gold fish crackers might keep her distracted long enough to get your shopping

done in peace? Like I said before, stages don't last forever, so you do your

best to deal with them... if it's successful snacking while shopping, great,

it's not like you will have to give her a snack every time you leave the house

for the rest of her life... in fact, she'll let you know when it's time to stop

snacking while shopping because she'll start throwing the snacks..........

Wish I could be more helpful... as you can see, I've moved away from toddler

behavior and now live with three teen/tween daughters... whole different ball

game :-)

Good luck,

, mom to (16), (13 DS) and (12)

On 10/25/2011 9:25 AM, Alisonc wrote:

Hi

I would love any advice on how to handle my 2.5 year old screaming allot when we

go in public. She is good when she is home with my husband and myself, but as

soon as allot of people get around or in public. She yells allot. It is not the

crying screaming in is the loud hey look at me and get attention screaming. She

can speak about 2o words and does sign language, so she is able to communicate.

We usually take her out of the store if there is two of us, and if there is only

one than we will try to distract her with where is your eyes, or nose game....

This is my first child so I am not sure if this is a characterstic of down

syndrome or a toddler.

Thanks

Ali

[Guest guest]

I agree with . I think it's a combination of sensory (probably) and being

a toddler. I thought, foolishly, that my sweet angel who had NEVER had a cross

moment wasn't going to enter the terrible twos - HA! and double HA! She did.

Just after her brother was born - perfect time to start being contrary. No

stress...

On Oct 25, 2011, at 12:48 PM, Kerrigan wrote:

> Well, at 2.5, I'd guess toddler :-( Not that you can chalk everything

> up to the " terrible twos " but there are some characteristics that have

> led to this stereotype........ Our daughter with DS had sensory issues

> with loud noises, which caused her distress, but these would show

> equally at home and out, not just one place or the other. Do you think

> that your daughter is expressing fear of/discomfort new people when she

> screams in public? What is your gut, is she trying to communicate some

> problem to you? My guess is that if it's just an irritating behavior

> stage, it will pass before you figure it out.... that is a hallmark of

> parenting all kinds of kids! You finally figure out how to deal with

> something, and they stop doing it and move on to something else!

>

> You have hit on one of the most challenging things about having a child

> with a disability... knowing if the behavior is typical kid behavior, or

> if it is because or/related to the disability, or a combination of the

> two. I think what it comes down to is that you handle things in a way

> that is appropriate for your child developmentally, no matter what is

> causing a behavior, and be consistent.

>

> I would assume that she's going to do this when going out, so be

> prepared with different choices.... maybe she wants " her " noise, so how

> about a favorite one of those books that you push buttons and it plays

> music or sounds? I am not an advocate of pushing food at kids all the

> time, but a little baggie of cheerios or gold fish crackers might keep

> her distracted long enough to get your shopping done in peace? Like I

> said before, stages don't last forever, so you do your best to deal with

> them... if it's successful snacking while shopping, great, it's not like

> you will have to give her a snack every time you leave the house for the

> rest of her life... in fact, she'll let you know when it's time to stop

> snacking while shopping because she'll start throwing the snacks..........

>

> Wish I could be more helpful... as you can see, I've moved away from

> toddler behavior and now live with three teen/tween daughters... whole

> different ball game :-)

>

> Good luck,

> , mom to (16), (13 DS) and (12)

>

> On 10/25/2011 9:25 AM, Alisonc wrote:

> >

> > Hi

> >

> > I would love any advice on how to handle my 2.5 year old screaming

> > allot when we go in public. She is good when she is home with my

> > husband and myself, but as soon as allot of people get around or in

> > public. She yells allot. It is not the crying screaming in is the loud

> > hey look at me and get attention screaming. She can speak about 2o

> > words and does sign language, so she is able to communicate. We

> > usually take her out of the store if there is two of us, and if there

> > is only one than we will try to distract her with where is your eyes,

> > or nose game.... This is my first child so I am not sure if this is a

> > characterstic of down syndrome or a toddler.

> >

> > Thanks

> > Ali

> >

> >

>

>

[Guest guest]

I think you said it right there. She is not in distress if she can stop, say Hi

and then start again. Pardon my saying so but seems to me like she is trying to

control a situation and get your attention. Again - I don't know either of you

and this is just my opinion but I have a brat at home as well who will act up in

stores because he doesn't think he can be punished with all those people around.

Amazing how smart they are huh? Lol either way I am sure this will pass. Be

consistent with your response and she'll get tired of it. I used to give a

fav toy to play with from a shelf and put it back on my way out - just to keep

him occupied.

Good luck! Dawn mom to 18 ds

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Re: 2 1/2 screaming allot in public

Well, at 2.5, I'd guess toddler :-( Not that you can chalk everything up to the

" terrible twos " but there are some characteristics that have led to this

stereotype........ Our daughter with DS had sensory issues with loud noises,

which caused her distress, but these would show equally at home and out, not

just one place or the other. Do you think that your daughter is expressing fear

of/discomfort new people when she screams in public? What is your gut, is she

trying to communicate some problem to you? My guess is that if it's just an

irritating behavior stage, it will pass before you figure it out.... that is a

hallmark of parenting all kinds of kids! You finally figure out how to deal

with something, and they stop doing it and move on to something else!

You have hit on one of the most challenging things about having a child with a

disability... knowing if the behavior is typical kid behavior, or if it is

because or/related to the disability, or a combination of the two. I think what

it comes down to is that you handle things in a way that is appropriate for your

child developmentally, no matter what is causing a behavior, and be consistent.

I would assume that she's going to do this when going out, so be prepared with

different choices.... maybe she wants " her " noise, so how about a favorite one

of those books that you push buttons and it plays music or sounds? I am not an

advocate of pushing food at kids all the time, but a little baggie of cheerios

or gold fish crackers might keep her distracted long enough to get your shopping

done in peace? Like I said before, stages don't last forever, so you do your

best to deal with them... if it's successful snacking while shopping, great,

it's not like you will have to give her a snack every time you leave the house

for the rest of her life... in fact, she'll let you know when it's time to stop

snacking while shopping because she'll start throwing the snacks..........

Wish I could be more helpful... as you can see, I've moved away from toddler

behavior and now live with three teen/tween daughters... whole different ball

game :-)

Good luck,

, mom to (16), (13 DS) and (12)

On 10/25/2011 9:25 AM, Alisonc wrote:

Hi

I would love any advice on how to handle my 2.5 year old screaming allot when we

go in public. She is good when she is home with my husband and myself, but as

soon as allot of people get around or in public. She yells allot. It is not the

crying screaming in is the loud hey look at me and get attention screaming. She

can speak about 2o words and does sign language, so she is able to communicate.

We usually take her out of the store if there is two of us, and if there is only

one than we will try to distract her with where is your eyes, or nose game....

This is my first child so I am not sure if this is a characterstic of down

syndrome or a toddler.

Thanks

Ali

[Guest guest]

Hi Ali!

((Hugs & Empathy!))

I am a mom of 4, and my youngest is 2 1/2 with DS. I still wondered when she

started screaming if it was typical or DS! The main reason being that my other

children fussed, but I don't remember any of them screaming - especially not in

public.

So my youngest, with DS, is my first screamer. The only reason I figured out it

was manipulation (very typical of 2) and not DS was the fact it was situational.

It only happened with me at home when I was working with my other children, or

in public. It never happened when my husband was home with her alone or with

her & the other kids or all of us together. Never. She has my number, because

I was afraid to discipline a child with DS.

The solution. I started to discipline her like I would my other kids. She is

very responsive and learns easily in this area. She too has 50 words, so

communication is not the reason. She wants to get what she wants by screaming

at me. Since this is not a livable situation with 3 other children I am

disciplining her. Since she is 2 1/2, and it wasn't started at 14 months, it

has been harder to learn than it would have been earlier. She is getting it

though.

We had a day in the store where she screamed non-stop for 15 minutes. Torture.

She has only screamed once or twice since for 1 - 2 minutes since she didn't get

what she wanted the 15 minute time. What she wanted was to be held or down to

crawl. Both our completely unrealistic when shopping with 3 other children and

pushing a cart.

The second battle of wills occurred when she wanted up and screamed (this time

at home). She was wanting out of her favorite spot that she can not climb out

of herself. I told her to say ma-ma up. She screamed for 1 hour (this may

sound cruel, but I had to win). After 1 hour she said ma-ma up in a nice voice.

I then had 3 days of complete peace. She is starting to test the screaming

again this week. The result is time-outs.

Discipline her like any two year old. DS children learn slower, but they learn.

It is a blessing, and as far as I can tell they can learn things like this as

quickly as any strong willed 2 year old.

Blessings for success,

>

> Hi

>

> I would love any advice on how to handle my 2.5 year old screaming allot when

we go in public. She is good when she is home with my husband and myself, but as

soon as allot of people get around or in public. She yells allot. It is not the

crying screaming in is the loud hey look at me and get attention screaming. She

can speak about 2o words and does sign language, so she is able to communicate.

We usually take her out of the store if there is two of us, and if there is only

one than we will try to distract her with where is your eyes, or nose game....

This is my first child so I am not sure if this is a characterstic of down

syndrome or a toddler.

>

> Thanks

> Ali

>