well...new, sad, question for help

[Guest guest]

Folks,

My girl is 16. She attends high school. The aide she had was pulled for monetary

reasons...last hired, first fired...so a new (to us) aide was given the

responsibility of working with my girl to help her maintain her focus and

shepherd her safely through the halls to her classes. My girl has severe ADD and

is really impulsive. She tries hard, is very pleasant, is well liked by the

other kids, but has a lot of trouble staying on task, hence the need for the

aide.

Here's the reason for my posting:

1.The new aide did not want to be pulled from her self contained classroom to be

placed with . She made no bones about that. She never once pretended (even

to me - 's mom - helloooo!) that she wanted to work with her.

2. I have had concerns for a variety of reasons about the new aide, but hoped it

would get better as she got to know and work with her. Apparently, I'm too

much the eternal optimist.

3. I have been approached by parents of fellow students, students, and several

teachers telling me in various ways they are greatly concerned about the aide. I

have been told (I did not seek out any of this information) the aide is terribly

impatient with , has, at a minimum, made her cry in homeroom (for goodness'

sake!), doesn't allow her to visit in the hall (unlike the old aide) as she

heads to her next class, and is generally mean to her. Even in front of me as I

drop off at school, she has spoken to her harshly and with impatience.

Even over little stuff.

4. Additionally, the aide is just really grumpy, hardly ever seems happy, looks

miserable, and teachers are saying, " Gee, we sure miss _____(previous aide). "

My stomach is a ball of knots. I didn't sleep last night. And I'm on the verge

of sobbing every minute of the day today. It is a parent's third worst nightmare

(having a kid stolen is my first worst, death is 2nd). I have an appointment

for next Monday with the assistant principal who I like a lot. I would go

sooner, but I really want my husband there and he's away on travel.

I know my list seems long, but I don't know that it's really concrete. I do not

have a child who can tell me about her day, and you can bet the aide did not

write a note on the daily comm log informing me she made my girl cry in front of

her entire homeroom, over nothing significant. I actually don't care if it was

significant - that should pretty much NEVER happen! You don't get to make a

child cry! I'm a teacher, and I NEVER do that to a kid, even one who is horribly

disrespectful and disobedient. We're supposed to be the adults.

Anyway, please tell me what you think I should do, and/or how to go about this.

I want a new aide placed with my daughter. Someone compassionate, kind, patient,

etc. My girl is high energy and busy.

All advice is welcome.

Thank you in advance,

Eleanor