wandering

[Guest guest]

Hello Margaret,

I'm sure that Helen could not hear me when I shouted for her when she was

running off. She didn't turn or indicate in any way that she'd heard me -

she'd just continue her bee-line for whatever it was she was making for

(usually nothing!). It was really great when she did turn, and even if she

still ran off, I knew she'd heard me. Nowadays she nearly always returns

when I ask her to - just wonderful! It's amazing how quickly you forget

about all the bad times when things start going right.

Eileen mum to triplets Emma, Helen (DS) and Kate (7 years)

[Guest guest]

I have 5 DS kids here, only one with DS/Autism. If given the opportunity

they would wonder.

& Garry, parents of (9 ds), (8 ds/g-tube), JJ (6

ds/autism/celiac), (5 ds), and Esther (3 ds). All adopted.

[Guest guest]

Pat,

I agree completely with you. Brook is doing his own thing and would and

has taken off before. The famous case were was when he left his special day

class 3 1/2 years ago, crossed the street and wandered over to a house where

I think he probably saw a hose. He is obsessed with water. The owner of the

house was in his garage and after 15 to 20 minutes managed to figure out what

classroom he belonged to and returned him to his class. Meanwhile his

teacher didn't even know he was gone! This was one of the worst teachers in

the universe and we had been trying to get her fired for months. That took

care of her and we actually have Brook to thank.

The next time he had a great escape he was watching a video in the living

room. DH didn't hear him and went to look in the LR and he was gone. He had

pushed the screen out of the window frame and climbed out the window. Then

he crossed the street and went down 2 houses until he found what he had been

looking for a hose. I ran across the street to find him watering the

driveway of some of our neighbors.

Anyway Brook isn't afraid of any consequences and he just plain doesn't

understand the rest of the world at all. So it's just up to us to keep him

under lock and key. I just hope his teacher at his new school realizes that

he could walk off at any time, it's hard to get this across sometimes when

they haven't seen it yet.

Marisa

[Guest guest]

Leah,

I remember you asked once about Brook's respite care provider who is 72

and how does she handle him. She has been taking care of him for almost 5

years and he has really calmed down a great deal over the last few years. He

can be very difficult sometimes mainly because he's in one of his whiny

miserable moods and hates all of his videos. This happens when he is off of

school for breaks or even on weekends. At those times we usually give him a

bath. We have to use techniques with him in order to accomplish tasks. Music

and Teddy Ruxpin and baths are a great part of this. Mainly we try to

distract him.

Marisa

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 7/14/100 2:26:22 PM EST, poggim@... writes:

<< Anyway Brook isn't afraid of any consequences and he just plain

doesn't

understand the rest of the world at all. So it's just up to us to keep him

under lock and key. I just hope his teacher at his new school realizes that

he could walk off at any time, it's hard to get this across sometimes when

they haven't seen it yet.

Marisa

>>

Hi Marisa,

has escaped 2 times from home and we were frantic to find him and

fortunate that he hadn't been gone long or far. fits your statement

above to a tee. He doesn't know about the outside world and he'd walk into

any dangerous situation with no regards to his life or limb. Because he is

like this he has a constant aide with him in school. He never goes anywhere

without her. Lately, she told us that she has dropped about 10 steps behind

him when he's going to the cafe or library to see how he would do. She says

that he does really well. I know that he's always one step away from

distraction and wandering off. He still needs that constant supervision and

so far all at the school agree. Next year will go to another building

and I'm afraid of how he will react to it. I don't know of another child that

has a one on one aide there and I will be eager to see how they will handle

's uniqueness.

Judy

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 8/21/02 9:11:04 PM Pacific Daylight Time,

pastmidvale@... writes:

<< Well, my concern about Elie waue again. Today, while I was at work and dh

was in charge, the man forgot to set the alarm on the door while he went

outside to work in the garden. Elie left, went to the neighbors and walked

through their house and up to the 3rd floor where he refused to be moved.

>>

Whoa Sara, how scary. Glad he went to the *good* neighbors at least. Do you

think that was enough to scare him into staying in the house and not

wandering any more?

Gail :-)

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 8/22/02 12:11:22 AM Eastern Daylight Time,

pastmidvale@... writes:

> Life is such an adventure.

>

Eeekkk Sara!!! I'll say!! Maddie hasn't escaped in a long long time,

but we're extremely diligent about locking doors and gates. Would Elie run

into the street or something really dangerous? Living in the city, it's my

biggest fear with Maddie (well, that and roof walking....LOL). First thing

she does when she gets outside is head for the street.

Donna

[Guest guest]

Hi Sara,

Thankfully Elie went to the good neighbors! You never know when they're old

tricks will resurface, oh well. At least he is home and safe.

Charlyne

Mom to Zeb 9 DS/OCD ?

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 8/22/2002 9:55:37 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

pastmidvale@... writes:

> Elie left the yard tonight while his respite worker was talking to me - he

> crossed the street to her car - just ahead of a speeding auto. The respite

> worker is positive she locked the gate. Either she is mistaken or he has

> learned how to unlock the gate. This adventure is not fun!! :~(

Hi Sara,

I think Elie had his angel watching over him! Yikes.

Charlyne

Mom to Zeb 9 DS/OCD ?

[Guest guest]

----Original Message Follows----

Elie left the yard tonight while his respite worker was talking to me - he

crossed the street to her car - just ahead of a speeding auto. The respite

worker is positive she locked the gate. Either she is mistaken or he has

learned how to unlock the gate. This adventure is not fun!! :~(

Sara

From: duffey48@...

Reply-

Subject: Re: Wandering

Date: Thu, 22 Aug 2002 13:37:20 EDT

In a message dated 8/22/02 12:11:22 AM Eastern Daylight Time,

pastmidvale@... writes:

> Life is such an adventure.

>

Eeekkk Sara!!! I'll say!! Maddie hasn't escaped in a long long time,

but we're extremely diligent about locking doors and gates. Would Elie

run

into the street or something really dangerous? Living in the city, it's my

biggest fear with Maddie (well, that and roof walking....LOL). First thing

she does when she gets outside is head for the street.

Donna

[Guest guest]

im very glad elie is ok, i know what yo mean as soon

as we start to relax, BOOM! shame on us, lol, hugs

shawna,.

--- sara cohen <pastmidvale@...> wrote:

> Well, my concern about Elie waue again. Today,

> while I was at work and dh

> was in charge, the man forgot to set the alarm on

> the door while he went

> outside to work in the garden. Elie left, went to

> the neighbors and walked

> through their house and up to the 3rd floor where he

> refused to be moved.

> DH was called (and actually heard the 'phone) and

> went to get Elie. Elie

> was asked where he was and he answered " My house " .

> The neighbors have a

> mirror of our house with minor differences from 85

> years of different

> families, but basically the same house. Elie

> refuses (or doesn't realize)

> that he was in someone elses house. Thought he had

> outgrown this but back

> to ever vigilant with the outside door alarm. I had

> even stopped locking our

> gates all the time. That will teach me. At least

> these neighbors have SOME

> understanding - they had a daughter with a " touch of

> DS " who is now " one of

> G-d's angels " .

>

> My neighbors on the otherside would just call the

> police!!

>

> Life is such an adventure.

>

> Sara

>

>

_________________________________________________________________

> Join the world’s largest e-mail service with MSN

> Hotmail.

> http://www.hotmail.com

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

My has also done this... waits until I'm distracted and then

bolts for the road. Several times I have been lucky enough that a

motorist stopped and honked or got out of his car. We live on a

street that is sometimes busy and the traffic always goes too fast.

Also lost him for 10 minutes earlier this summer - inches from

calling 911 when we found him hiding behind the barn. Doesn't come

when he's called and doesn't get the safety thing. A very scary

combination.

Ruth mom to Shauna 7, twins Mike(PDD) and (DS/PDD) 6, and

almost one and full of it.

> ----Original Message Follows----

>

> Elie left the yard tonight while his respite worker was talking to

me - he

> crossed the street to her car - just ahead of a speeding auto. The

respite

> worker is positive she locked the gate. Either she is mistaken or

he has

> learned how to unlock the gate. This adventure is not fun!! :~(

>

> Sara

>

>

> From: duffey48@a...

> Reply-@y...

> @y...

> Subject: Re: Wandering

> Date: Thu, 22 Aug 2002 13:37:20 EDT

>

> In a message dated 8/22/02 12:11:22 AM Eastern Daylight Time,

> pastmidvale@h... writes:

>

>

> > Life is such an adventure.

> >

>

> Eeekkk Sara!!! I'll say!! Maddie hasn't escaped in a long

long time,

> but we're extremely diligent about locking doors and gates.

Would Elie

> run

> into the street or something really dangerous? Living in the

city, it's my

> biggest fear with Maddie (well, that and roof walking....LOL).

First thing

> she does when she gets outside is head for the street.

> Donna

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Sure understand this issue. It's one of our biggest worries with

Angel. she is fast when she bolts and always heads for danger. It's

the most horrible feeling when you can't find them and they won't

answer you at all.

Cheryl

mom to Angel and Allie

> > ----Original Message Follows----

> >

> > Elie left the yard tonight while his respite worker was talking

to

> me - he

> > crossed the street to her car - just ahead of a speeding auto.

The

> respite

> > worker is positive she locked the gate. Either she is mistaken

or

> he has

> > learned how to unlock the gate. This adventure is not fun!! :~(

> >

> > Sara

> >

> >

> > From: duffey48@a...

> > Reply-@y...

> > @y...

> > Subject: Re: Wandering

> > Date: Thu, 22 Aug 2002 13:37:20 EDT

> >

> > In a message dated 8/22/02 12:11:22 AM Eastern Daylight Time,

> > pastmidvale@h... writes:

> >

> >

> > > Life is such an adventure.

> > >

> >

> > Eeekkk Sara!!! I'll say!! Maddie hasn't escaped in a long

> long time,

> > but we're extremely diligent about locking doors and gates.

> Would Elie

> > run

> > into the street or something really dangerous? Living in the

> city, it's my

> > biggest fear with Maddie (well, that and roof walking....LOL).

> First thing

> > she does when she gets outside is head for the street.

> > Donna

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

I had a nightmare the other night that was so realistic. I had a dream that

wandered away. For those who know us, he got the wandering gene

which started to show when he was 2. I've experienced that panicky feeling

that continues to haunt me, even though has been doing much better.

He is almost 17 now.

We thought about the companion dog, but we felt he needed a pet instead. So

we got Snoop and he had the wandering gene, too! In time, got

really good about keeping Snoop in unless he wanted our attention and would

let Snoop out. Snoop really was the best thing we ever got - and I

am still missing him something terribly!

So we moved into a house that has a tall fence (split rail- 5 feet tall with

wire) and hard to open gates. When got out the front door, then we

got the security system. If the alarm goes off and we don't reset it quick

enough, a voice comes over the speakers to ask if there is an emergency and

if not, we give our codes. The alarm is pretty loud and scared when

we used it consistently. It also can tell you if a door is open or a

window. Tim thought a cat or something has been getting to the pond until

he caught and Wiggles (my grandpug) out by it the other morning.

was feeding the fish. So we scrounged up a baby monitor to put near

the main intercom station - that way we can hear if opens the door

while we are in bed and tend to him quickly.

Katey's best friend/college room mate is the execuative director for

Paws4People. Her father brought dogs in to 's self-contained

classroom when we lived in Virginia and they were able to incorporate some

IEP goals with them.

wandering

>

>

>

>

> The parents in my support group have been talking a lot about their kids

> wandering off.

> We've been looking into GPS type alarms. We don't want the ankle bracelet

> that goes through the police.....we want to be able to monitor it

> ourselves.

> Here is one we've been considering.

> http://WWW.brickhousesecurity.Com/child-locator.HTML

>

> Dayna

> <><

>

>

[Guest guest]

The parents in my support group have been talking a lot about their kids

wandering off.

We've been looking into GPS type alarms. We don't want the ankle bracelet

that goes through the police.....we want to be able to monitor it ourselves.

Here is one we've been considering.

http://WWW.brickhousesecurity.Com/child-locator.HTML

Dayna

<><

[Guest guest]

Search for devices that they use for Alzheimer patients....I mean use that word

in your search because there is technology that help them with wandering.

I've also heard of small inexpensive devices that you can put on windows and

doors that sound an alarm when the contact is broken.

Also about wandering.... Most of our kids outgrow...or mature....enough that

they eventually stop the wandering. At least that has been our experience...and

others that I know.

Best wishes to you all!

Shirley, mom to Josiah, now 21yo

wandering

The parents in my support group have been talking a lot about their kids

wandering off.

We've been looking into GPS type alarms. We don't want the ankle bracelet

that goes through the police.....we want to be able to monitor it ourselves.

Here is one we've been considering.

http://WWW.brickhousesecurity.Com/child-locator.HTML

Dayna

<><

[Guest guest]

Myah is 9. I'm not sure if it is wandering so much as purposeful escape...LOL we

have keyed doors on both sides throughout the house. The place is on lockdown!

Have a fenced yard with a padlock on it too.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Re: wandering

I'm trying to remember....hopefully others with kids....experiencing it now (or

more recently) will post when their kids stop the risky behavior of

wandering....or with us it was running away....he was so fast. Vaguely I think

it was mid to late elementary school...but I don't have a clear memory of it.

Shirley

wandering

The parents in my support group have been talking a lot about their kids

wandering off.

We've been looking into GPS type alarms. We don't want the ankle bracelet

that goes through the police.....we want to be able to monitor it ourselves.

Here is one we've been considering.

http://WWW.brickhousesecurity.Com/child-locator.HTML

Dayna

<><

[Guest guest]

I strongly believe part of the reason why our kids do wander, is

a) - they don't have the communication skills to ask questions, so

they go and seek for themselves

- the majority of times if they do indicate they want to look at

something they are told 'no', we are not interested in that etc. etc.

c) - they are trying to prove to us that they are able to get from a

to b safely.

d) - they see their peers/siblings with freedom and want the same.

For those with wandering children, put yourselves in their shoes and try and

understand why they are taking off. I cannot recall one instance where

Trent has just taken off for the purpose of just getting away from me.

There has always been a reason sometimes it has been embarrassing as his

curiosity has driven him to open an alarmed door or his need to go to the

bathroom has him in a staff/security only area.

Then there is the nice person in the neighbourhood, who never says no and

will give them something that they like/want. We use to have Trent up early

of a morning going to a neighbour's house just to get his much loved 2

minute noodles. We live in a rural area and the neighbour wasn't just next

door, fortunately we could see him making his way to her house and back.

Or another time, at another neighbours, late at night but further away,

across a highway and a river - he disappeared. He had torn his shirt and

wanted to go home and change it.

Yes, the wandering is a worry but how about giving your child a bit more

freedom (supervised without their knowledge sometimes) and instead of

getting cross because they have left you/house, explain that they have to

ask first and be prepared for no it isn't the best time. When it isn't the

best time to go, again explain why and maybe suggest a time they can do it.

Our kids are very intelligent and can be reasoned with, just that 'we' (as

in society) have been conditioned to believe that they can't do anything

without constant supervision.

Keep smiling

Jan, mother of Trent 25yo w/DS from the LandDownUnder

From: [mailto: ] On Behalf

Of cshos

Sent: Tuesday, 18 May 2010 10:18 AM

Subject: Re: wandering

Search for devices that they use for Alzheimer patients....I mean use that

word in your search because there is technology that help them with

wandering.

I've also heard of small inexpensive devices that you can put on windows and

doors that sound an alarm when the contact is broken.

Also about wandering.... Most of our kids outgrow...or mature....enough that

they eventually stop the wandering. At least that has been our

experience...and others that I know.

Best wishes to you all!

Shirley, mom to Josiah, now 21yo

wandering

The parents in my support group have been talking a lot about their kids

wandering off.

We've been looking into GPS type alarms. We don't want the ankle bracelet

that goes through the police.....we want to be able to monitor it ourselves.

Here is one we've been considering.

http://WWW.brickhousesecurity.Com/child-locator.HTML

Dayna

<><

[Guest guest]

Not saying it isn't easy and like all kids she will test the

boundaries. Trent will walk into houses, closed doors mean nothing to him.

He woke our neighbour up who had just gone to bed after being on night shift

- for some reason the guy didn't appreciate being woken.

Keep on trying giving her independence, in the long run it will work.

I suppose something else we should all be working on, don't go off with

strangers, another hard one.

Last year when were in LA, Trent left our Hotel room to look for his brother

and sil, I was fine with that knowing he would either come back to me or

stand at the end of the walkway watching the traffic. Except a nice person,

saw him alone in the car park and decided for his own safety to take him

back to his room.

In the meantime, I decided to check on him and he was nowhere in sight -

the kids had gone out for the night, I was still recovering from stress

fractures in my foot so walking wasn't the easiest, walked half the way back

to Disney asking people if they had seen him. Went back to reception and

the receptionist who was busy at the time knew who he was with.

Keep smiling

Jan

From: [mailto: ] On Behalf

Of kspilious@...

Sent: Tuesday, 18 May 2010 11:47 AM

Dayna Chandler;

Subject: Re: RE: wandering

We are trying to start to give myah more freedom, but we live in town and

the biggest problem is that she will go in other people's houses (that

aren't on lockdown!) Lol. She has gone in our neighbor's house and was found

playing their expensive instruments, which was not OK. She is showing more

restraint this summer, but we added a sliding door where she can go from the

house to the yard by herself and that gives her a little more independence.

Still, the problem is that she will escape when you take your eyes off of

her for one min. Or ride her bike right into the street with no concept of

the consequence. Last summer there were 12 kids playing together and 3 moms

watching them. She was on her scooter. All of a sudden, she was gone!! We

all panicked! We split up to look for her and had found that she left the

pack, when behind the garages, down the alley and was riding her scooter

down the street. She was outside and having fun but she still wanted to

escape-and knew I would never allow her to ride down the middle of the

street I guess! LOL I don't want anything to happen to her, but we are

trying to give her a little more space now. Just yesterday she was playing

in the neighbors yard for at least an hour. I would check on her every few

min. I then went to the front of the house and came back -maybe 3 min and

she was gone-had gone in their garage. My heart sank. I guess I have to work

on her telling me when she changes locations.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Fw: RE: wandering

Good advice Jan. Thanks.

In our group we are talking about 3 and 4 yr old kids that don't have any

concept of safety yet.

[Guest guest]

We just moved to a new house and our five year old that I never imagined

would be a wanderer has escaped twice now. It is the exact same thing

with the sliding glass door, and the moment I get distracted she is

silently out the door and on her way down the abandoned golf course cart

path. The girl is gonna drive me to drink!

We live in a duplex and the first time she went to the neighbors and set

the alarm off which called the police and she was sitting in the middle

of the dark golf course by the time I found her. The latch on the

sliding glass door is unreliable at best and you can think it is locked

and it is not. There is a bar, but after years of people trying to bang

it open without realizing it is there, it is bent and is not always

reliable either.

So I bought a baby gate that was supposedly " extended " only to find it

is too short. UGHHHH... So the chime alarm is getting installed

tomorrow. I hope, I hope, I hope it helps us.

The neighbor is also the sister of the landlord who was not happy and

immediately tattled on us behind our backs! Although if the door lock

had worked properly I do not think we would have had as big of an issue!

Still trying to slow my heart rate down and get a handle on this whole

'I wa-wa-wa-wa-waaaander... " thing that used to be:

" oh not my perfect little angel... she would never... HEY! COME

BACK HERE!!!! "

Dink-Bork

Phoebe 5 Our lively sparkle girl Ds & Cf

Nolan 7 Our loving smart all boy child

" Do not be afraid of tomorrow; for God is already there " ~Author unknown

On 5/17/2010 8:46 PM, kspilious@... wrote:

>

> We are trying to start to give myah more freedom, but we live in town

> and the biggest problem is that she will go in other people's houses

> (that aren't on lockdown!) Lol. She has gone in our neighbor's house

> and was found playing their expensive instruments, which was not OK.

> She is showing more restraint this summer, but we added a sliding door

> where she can go from the house to the yard by herself and that gives

> her a little more independence. Still, the problem is that she will

> escape when you take your eyes off of her for one min. Or ride her

> bike right into the street with no concept of the consequence. Last

> summer there were 12 kids playing together and 3 moms watching them.

> She was on her scooter. All of a sudden, she was gone!! We all

> panicked! We split up to look for her and had found that she left the

> pack, when behind the garages, down the alley and was riding her

> scooter down the street. She was outside and having fun but she still

> wanted to escape-and knew I would never allow her to ride down the

> middle of the street I guess! LOL I don't want anything to happen to

> her, but we are trying to give her a little more space now. Just

> yesterday she was playing in the neighbors yard for at least an hour.

> I would check on her every few min. I then went to the front of the

> house and came back -maybe 3 min and she was gone-had gone in their

> garage. My heart sank. I guess I have to work on her telling me when

> she changes locations.

> Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

>

> Fw: RE: wandering

>

>

> Good advice Jan. Thanks.

>

> In our group we are talking about 3 and 4 yr old kids that don't have

> any concept of safety yet.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Jan,

I totally agree with you! is 9 and when she goes off on her own

( does not wander at all,knows EXACTLY where and what she wants ) the way to

diffuse it is to find ways to give MORE freedom. That is what she wants.

We too have the house locked down when I sleep or take a shower. You have

to. I would LOVE to see the maker of those invisible dog fences modify a

device so it would alarm when the child was about to cross the fence. That

would give lots of freedom in her yard!

Carol in IL

Mom to , 9 DS

My problem is not how I look. It's how you see me.

facebook- doihavtasay@...

Listen to oldest dd's music http://www.myspace.com/vennamusic

On Mon, May 17, 2010 at 8:25 PM, Jan Marie <janmarie21@...> wrote:

>

>

> I strongly believe part of the reason why our kids do wander, is

>

> a) - they don't have the communication skills to ask questions, so

> they go and seek for themselves

>

> - the majority of times if they do indicate they want to look at

> something they are told 'no', we are not interested in that etc. etc.

>

> c) - they are trying to prove to us that they are able to get from a

> to b safely.

>

> d) - they see their peers/siblings with freedom and want the same.

>

> For those with wandering children, put yourselves in their shoes and try

> and

> understand why they are taking off. I cannot recall one instance where

> Trent has just taken off for the purpose of just getting away from me.

> There has always been a reason sometimes it has been embarrassing as his

> curiosity has driven him to open an alarmed door or his need to go to the

> bathroom has him in a staff/security only area.

>

> Then there is the nice person in the neighbourhood, who never says no and

> will give them something that they like/want. We use to have Trent up early

> of a morning going to a neighbour's house just to get his much loved 2

> minute noodles. We live in a rural area and the neighbour wasn't just next

> door, fortunately we could see him making his way to her house and back.

>

> Or another time, at another neighbours, late at night but further away,

> across a highway and a river - he disappeared. He had torn his shirt and

> wanted to go home and change it.

>

> Yes, the wandering is a worry but how about giving your child a bit more

> freedom (supervised without their knowledge sometimes) and instead of

> getting cross because they have left you/house, explain that they have to

> ask first and be prepared for no it isn't the best time. When it isn't the

> best time to go, again explain why and maybe suggest a time they can do it.

>

> Our kids are very intelligent and can be reasoned with, just that 'we' (as

> in society) have been conditioned to believe that they can't do anything

> without constant supervision.

>

> Keep smiling

>

> Jan, mother of Trent 25yo w/DS from the LandDownUnder

>

> From: <%40> [mailto:

> <%40>] On Behalf

> Of cshos

> Sent: Tuesday, 18 May 2010 10:18 AM

>

> <%40>

> Subject: Re: wandering

>

> Search for devices that they use for Alzheimer patients....I mean use that

> word in your search because there is technology that help them with

> wandering.

>

> I've also heard of small inexpensive devices that you can put on windows

> and

> doors that sound an alarm when the contact is broken.

>

> Also about wandering.... Most of our kids outgrow...or mature....enough

> that

> they eventually stop the wandering. At least that has been our

> experience...and others that I know.

>

> Best wishes to you all!

>

> Shirley, mom to Josiah, now 21yo

>

> wandering

>

> The parents in my support group have been talking a lot about their kids

> wandering off.

> We've been looking into GPS type alarms. We don't want the ankle bracelet

> that goes through the police.....we want to be able to monitor it

> ourselves.

>

> Here is one we've been considering.

> http://WWW.brickhousesecurity.Com/child-locator.HTML

>

> Dayna

> <><

>

>