Three year old temper tantrums

[Guest guest]

Hi everyone.

I was a member of this group a few years ago when I was pregnant with my

daughter, Grace. Thank you to all of you who talked with me and gave me advice.

Everything you told me about how my daughter would be more like us than

different was absolutely true. We've all sailed through the first three years

(relatively easily, save for heart surgery at 6 months) and she's become quite

the little charmer.

However........

I am in need of your assistance and expertise yet again! )

Grace has been throwing some temper tantrums when she doesn't get her way, and

usually at inopportune times (in church, in restaurants, etc.) and I'm pretty

much at my wits' end trying to figure out how to deal with it or discipline her.

Her language skills are actually quite good, and on most days she understands

very well. When she throws the tantrums, all of a sudden she doesn't seem to

know what I'm explaining to her. My mommy gut instinct is telling me she knows

exactly what she's doing, but I can't seem to get a handle on her bahvior.

She's quite resourceful in pretend play as well, so time outs usually wind up

with her talking to herself or some other object in the room. Or singing songs.

Sigh...........

Very cute, but I'm ready to run away! lol

Any advice?

Thanks so much!

Hurley

[Guest guest]

My eldest son swears he can remember when he was little and wanted to say

something and could not and throwing a tantrum out of frustration. As

hard-pressed as I am to believe he can remember that far back, it does make

sense. I always handled tantrums at that age by ignoring them. Worked most

of the time, but not always. I am no help at all, am I.

granny

On Mon, Apr 19, 2010 at 7:58 AM, lhurley06 <lhurley06@...> wrote:

>

>

> Hi everyone.

>

> I was a member of this group a few years ago when I was pregnant with my

> daughter, Grace. Thank you to all of you who talked with me and gave me

> advice. Everything you told me about how my daughter would be more like us

> than different was absolutely true. We've all sailed through the first three

> years (relatively easily, save for heart surgery at 6 months) and she's

> become quite the little charmer.

>

> However........

>

> I am in need of your assistance and expertise yet again! )

>

> Grace has been throwing some temper tantrums when she doesn't get her way,

> and usually at inopportune times (in church, in restaurants, etc.) and I'm

> pretty much at my wits' end trying to figure out how to deal with it or

> discipline her. Her language skills are actually quite good, and on most

> days she understands very well. When she throws the tantrums, all of a

> sudden she doesn't seem to know what I'm explaining to her. My mommy gut

> instinct is telling me she knows exactly what she's doing, but I can't seem

> to get a handle on her bahvior. She's quite resourceful in pretend play as

> well, so time outs usually wind up with her talking to herself or some other

> object in the room. Or singing songs. Sigh...........

>

> Very cute, but I'm ready to run away! lol

>

> Any advice?

>

> Thanks so much!

> Hurley

>

>

>

--

Not for ourselves but for the whole world we were born

[Guest guest]

I would not let the behavior dictate what your response is.  We all have a

tendancy " espcially when out " to be embarressed by tantrums but I think the best

way to deal with them is to ignore the behavior because eventually when she

doesn't get the wanted response she will quit.  I can remember taking my now

15 year old out to the stores.  He has ADHD and those early years were ROUGH. 

At home when he would throw a tantrum he would go to time out for

three minutes.  He was about three at this time.  It would take me 20 minutes

to get him to sit for three.  I would stand at the bottom of the stairs.

(bottom stair was time out bench because there was no stimuli there to keep hinm

happy) and play goalie.  He would get up I would put him back...all without

talking.  Eventually he would tire and after the required three minutes we

would " talk " and he would be let off.  After about a month of playing goalie he

would go to time out and stay there.  Figured he was going anyway lol!  It was

rough but worth it.  Also when we went out I would usually tell him that if he

behaved he would get a little toy or if in the market he could pick out his

favorite cereal.  That was the first thing we did when we got to store or

supermarket (whcih was particularly over stimulating for him) He would then hold

the coveted object.  If he started to misbehave I would remind him of the deal

one time.  Next time.  I would pick him up and walk out of wherever I was with

a screaming child and all eyes on me. Hard?  You bet (especially considering I

had to go BACK to do the shopping) but guess what...it paid off.  After three

or four times of leaving the store abruptly with no coveted prize.,  It only

took one rminder to get him back on track.  And then as he grew we changed it

up to if you behave for three times you get something ( a favorite show or food

etc.)  I hope this helps.  Unfortunately it isn't easy but tenacity and

consistence do work.  it will take a little time but be well worth your

effort.  Hope this helps.

 

Loree

Three year old temper tantrums

  Hi everyone.

I was a member of this group a few years ago when I was pregnant with my

daughter, Grace. Thank you to all of you who talked with me and gave me advice.

Everything you told me about how my daughter would be more like us than

different was absolutely true. We've all sailed through the first three years

(relatively easily, save for heart surgery at 6 months) and she's become quite

the little charmer.

However........

I am in need of your assistance and expertise yet again! )

Grace has been throwing some temper tantrums when she doesn't get her way, and

usually at inopportune times (in church, in restaurants, etc.) and I'm pretty

much at my wits' end trying to figure out how to deal with it or discipline her.

Her language skills are actually quite good, and on most days she understands

very well. When she throws the tantrums, all of a sudden she doesn't seem to

know what I'm explaining to her. My mommy gut instinct is telling me she knows

exactly what she's doing, but I can't seem to get a handle on her bahvior. She's

quite resourceful in pretend play as well, so time outs usually wind up with her

talking to herself or some other object in the room. Or singing songs.

Sigh...........

Very cute, but I'm ready to run away! lol

Any advice?

Thanks so much!

Hurley