Thank you for the welcome!

March 27, 2006

I know this may sound harsh ..... why don't they go to couples counselling

before " Divorce Court? "

Divorce is way too easy to do when the bumps of life come along. It isn't an

SMA thing/issue either, it's a relationship thing/issue.

Can they not ride out the waves and take active steps to improve their

relationship first? Have they?

Angie

On Monday 27 March 2006 05:16, wrote:

> Hello all! I wanted to say hello and introduce myself and explain why

> I am here. My name is , I am 25 years old. I do not have SMA,

> but my best friend (we've been friends for 13 years) is married to a

> guy who has SMA. I am not sure what kind it is, but he is in a chair,

> and has almost no movement at all. He is 31 years old, and only has

> facial movement capabilities. The reason I requested to join this

> group is because they are currently going through a divorce. They are

> in the very beginning stages ... no legal action has been taken yet.

> My friend loves this guy dearly, and I don't blame her. He is a

> wonderful human being, but the romantic love that they had has faded

> and they are nothing more than friends now. They have decided on a

> divorce, but she doesn't want to leave unless she knows that he will be

> taken care of. Basically, he can't really work, and his government

> benfits aren't enough for him to live on. His brother is his aid, but

> can't get anymore than 50 hours a week paid for. I was just wondering

> if anybody here can give me some idea's for her. Is there any way that

> he can live on his own once she's gone? Can he get more assistance?

> Any thoughts would be welcome! Thank you and god bless.

>

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March 27, 2006

I agree. Many people need to pull out a dictionary and notice that

" love " is a verb. That means it's an action. You act your way into

feeling, you don't feel your way into acting. I never feel like working

out, but after I do it I feel pretty good about it. She probably had

some physical attraction at the very beginning, but the feeling of

romantic love came after she acted on that attraction...not before. I

think it's ridiculous that our society paints this happily ever after

happens automatically picture, and makes people think that the feeling

of love is always just there all by itself...and, if it goes away, so

should we. Hollywood has given us a completely inaccurate picture of

what love is, and as a result of that we have the most messed up family

structure in the history of our country. If you want to know what love

is, here ya go:

" Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it

is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily

angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but

rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always

hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. "

They're all action words. If she doesn't figure that out she'll have

the same problem with the next guy. She needs to start acting toward

her husband in a loving way, and then the feelings will return. On the

other side of the fence there may be a slightly different shade of

grass, but it's still just grass!!! In fact, there may be more weeds in

the next guys lawn!!!!!!

Jay

Re: Thank you for the welcome!

I know this may sound harsh ..... why don't they go to couples

counselling

before " Divorce Court? "

Divorce is way too easy to do when the bumps of life come along. It

isn't an