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RE: Nick and suspensions/MDR

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The way the head of special ed explained it to me, the 5 days suspension

from the bus count toward the 10 day, plus the 1 day from school counts. When

we reach a total of 10 we can request the MDR. None of us (staff or parents)

feel that it will come to that point. I do know the staff at the school was

surprised the transportation department felt 5 days was necessary (most of

the school staff felt it was excessive given Nick's typical persona).

The head of special ed was going to request the behavioral specialist stop

back by Nick's school next week and see if we can determine what might be

triggering the problems (they tend to start about lunch time which he has with

regular ed). Tuesday's incident seems to have started when the teacher

monitoring the lunch room refused to let Nick go to the bathroom (he had just

went

at the end of her period right before lunch), as soon as her back was turned

he left the lunch room (didn't go to the bathroom). He was running in and out

of the clusters (it's an open classroom design school with four clusters).

Finally the cornered him in the principal's office (where he hid under the

desk and started screaming).

The dean of students doesn't feel bullying is a factor as the students all

seem very protective of Nick. (I'm wondering if too protective/controlling?)

Hopefully, tomorrow will go smoothly and then next week the behavioral

specialist can figure something out. The staff and his parents are bamboozled.

Cari

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The dean of students doesn't feel bullying is a factor as the students all

seem very protective of Nick. (I'm wondering if too

protective/controlling?)>>>>>

It's quite possible he has to many 'chiefs' telling him what to do. :-)

I know there have are times when I've actually had to remember to back off

as long as wasn't doing anything that could hurt her or others. (even

at a young age, hehe)

I think that all of our kids go through the to many 'chiefs' phase a few

times in their lives. Because of our need to insure their safety we alot of

times don't see that they're capable of handling a little bit more so they

finally let us know in ways that really get our attention.

So you could have a point that there he is feeling really restricted by the

protectiveness and controlling of everyone around him.

Good Luck

Joy

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The too many 'chiefs' thought is very good and could very possibly be one of

the reasons why he is acting out. Again look at the big picture and what

is happening before and after.

When Trent was at our local primary school, it was very normal for the kids

to 'hang out' around the fence waving to the passing traffic. Whenever

Trent ventured near the fence, half the school would be running after him

telling him not to go there. The staff had told the children to watch Trent

and not let him near the fence in case he runaway. In reality though they

were setting double standards and no one ever bothered to explain to him why

he couldn't watch the traffic while others could. At other times this was a

game for him, and became a full on attention seeking behaviour.

I will stand by my belief that the majority of 'bad behaviour' of our

children is a trigger of something else that is happening and their way of

letting us know. The hard part is trying to figure it out without always

looking like you are making an excuse for them.

All the best,

Jan, mother of Trent 21yo w/DS from the LandDownUnder

31 more sleeps until we head to the UK and Dubai via a sleepover in

Singapore. Had jabs yesterday and my arms are really sore today. :)

Re: Nick and suspensions/MDR

The dean of students doesn't feel bullying is a factor as the students all

seem very protective of Nick. (I'm wondering if too

protective/controlling?)>>>>>

It's quite possible he has to many 'chiefs' telling him what to do. :-)

I know there have are times when I've actually had to remember to back off

as long as wasn't doing anything that could hurt her or others. (even

at a young age, hehe)

I think that all of our kids go through the to many 'chiefs' phase a few

times in their lives. Because of our need to insure their safety we alot of

times don't see that they're capable of handling a little bit more so they

finally let us know in ways that really get our attention.

So you could have a point that there he is feeling really restricted by the

protectiveness and controlling of everyone around him.

Good Luck

Joy

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messages to go to the sender of the message.

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In a message dated 2/15/2006 9:12:51 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,

janmarie21@... writes:

I will stand by my belief that the majority of 'bad behaviour' of our

children is a trigger of something else that is happening and their way of

letting us know. The hard part is trying to figure it out without always

looking like you are making an excuse for them.

Boy you got that right. Micah is always getting in trouble in Sunday school

for pushing this particular little girl away from him. Well she in on top

of him like white on rice telling him what he should and shouldn't do. He

says " No " or " " Top " (stop) but when she doesn't he pushes her away. I have

told them to watch each week and not just put him in time out for pushing.

Yes,

correct him, but tell the little girl to back off. It's like our kids get

judged much more harshly for everything they do, but I also believe that with

most behaviors there is something else going on. Especially when you know

that your child is very easy going to begin with.

Loree

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