Re: Fw: Embarassing moments

[Guest guest]

Oh I laughed so much, good jokes! Anne

[Guest guest]

Well this was cute. Last night my mom was saying that once when my sister

was really really little they were in the Grocery store and I guess she

wasnt behaving very well. SO my mom got really close to her and said to her

in her ear, " If you dont be quiet now Im going to break your arm. "

My sister turned and looked and her and loudly said, " WHY WOULD YOU WANT

TO BREAK MY ARM? "

hehe.

At 10:50 PM 3/6/01 +0800, you wrote:

>Strip Mall

>My husband and I took our three kids out shoe shopping one

>day. We were going from store to store, and the kids were

>getting restless. At one crowded store, I was standing near

>a bench when my 3-year-old climbed up on it, grabbed hold

>of my elastic-waist shorts, and jumped off pulling both my

>shorts and my underwear to the floor. I raced out of there,

>much to the delight of the appreciative onlookers.

>

>Curl Up and Die

>I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids

>in tow and asked loudly, " How much do you charge for a

>shampoo and a blow job? "

>

>Calculator Pad

>An insurance man visited me at home to talk about our

>mortgage insurance. He was throwing a lot of facts and

>figures at me, and I wanted to follow as best I could, so I

>told my 6-year-old son to run and get me a pad. He came

>back and handed me a Kotex right in front of our guest.

>

>Ho, Ho, Ho

>I was taking a shower when my 2-year-old son came into the

>bathroom and wrapped himself in toilet paper. Although he

>made a mess, he looked adorable, so I ran for my camera and

>took a few shots. They came out so well that I had copies

>made and included one with each of our Christmas cards.

>Days later, a relative called about the picture, laughing

>hysterically, and suggesting I take a closer look. Puzzled,

>I stared at the photo and was shocked to discover that in

>addition to my son, I had captured my reflection in the

>mirror - wearing nothing but a camera!

>

>Na-na na-na na-nah!

>While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided

>to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally

>able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust

>and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she

>did not start behaving " right now " she would be punished.

>To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice

>just as threatening, " If you don't let me go right now, I

>will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee

>last night! " . The silence was deafening after this

>enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they

>were doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked

>out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I

>heard when the door closed behind me were screams of

>laughter.

>

>Priceless

>One of the funniest " most-embarrassing-moment " stories I've

>come upon in a long time was about a lady who picked up

>several items at a discount store. When she finally got up

>to the checker, she learned that one of her items had no

>price tag. Imagine her embarrassment when the checker got

>on the intercom and boomed out for all the store to hear,

> " PRICE CHECK ON LANE THIRTEEN, TAMPAX, SUPERSIZE. " That was

>bad enough, but somebody at the rear of the store

>apparently misunderstood the word " Tampax " for

> " THUMBTACKS. "

>In a business-like tone, a voice boomed back over the

>intercom. " DO YOU WANT THE KIND YOU PUSH IN WITH YOUR THUMB

>OR THE KIND YOU POUND IN WITH A HAMMER? "

>

>Mom's Advice

>A teacher noticed that a little boy at the back of the

>class was squirming around, scratching his crotch and not

>paying attention. She went back to find out what was going

>on. He was quite embarrassed and whispered that he had just

>recently been circumcised and he was quite itchy. The

>teacher told him to go down to the principal's office. He

>was to phone his mother and ask her what he should do about

>it. He did it and returned to his class. Suddenly, there

>was a commotion at the back of the room. She went back to

>investigate only to find him sitting at his desk with his

>penis hanging out. " I thought I told you to call your mom. "

>she screamed. " I did, " he said, " And she told me that if I

>could stick it out till noon, she'd come and pick me up

>from school. "

>

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