Guest guest Posted October 7, 2004 Report Share Posted October 7, 2004 In a message dated 10/7/2004 7:39:11 PM US Mountain Standard Time, jbocci55@... writes: This next phase of his life is what has always scared me to death and now it is right around the corner and rapidly approaching. I SO agree with that. Maverick will be in HIGH SCHOOL next year and I really worry about what his future will be like. He has his goals..to be a cop and a basketball player, but the reality of what is out there for him is NOT something that he is going to understand. I am saddened when I think that I am going to have to be the one to shatter his dreams....and feel overwhelmed when I think that at the same time, I have to find something that will look exciting to him that is within his, and societies limits. Even worrying about whether to have him going to school after the rest of his class graduates bothers me. UGH. However, I agree with you, as I stated before that Cheryl's article was well written and informative and inspiring. M. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 7, 2004 Report Share Posted October 7, 2004 Finally was able to find time to sit down and read the last issue of Disability Solutions. Cheryl, great article on . I have to say, I came away from reading it with a feeling of being overwhelmed. is approaching age 17 at the end of this month and so much still needs to be done to prepare him for adulthood. Where I get hung up is right at the beginning, LOL, where everyone states that you must ask your child what he wants to do. What if your child cannot communicate that with you? speaks just fine, but he really has no concept of " the future " and setting goals for himself. So where do you begin when that is the case? I know he is sociable and loves to be around other people, but anytime I ask him what job he would like to have or what he wants to do he looks at me cluelessly. I'm so amazed at these wonderful young adults with DS who are able to advocate for themselves, and I feel bad that can't at this point. He is too " carefree " and he just goes with the flow and is never unhappy with where he is at or what he is doing. I've been guided by special education teachers all through 's school days and he has always loved going to school. Glancing over the checklist in that issue of the newsletter, I see many areas needs to improve on.......but everything takes sooooooooooooo long for him to accomplish, but at least I can start there and work on the things he still can't do independently. This next phase of his life is what has always scared me to death and now it is right around the corner and rapidly approaching. There are not enough hours in a day or days in week to set the things in motion that I would really like to try. I guess I will have to figure it out somehow. This issue was wonderful and is a great resource for me now. Jackie, Mom to 16ds, 14, and Bradley 10 -------------- Original message -------------- > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 8, 2004 Report Share Posted October 8, 2004 I think the time factor is one reason why I am so jealous of people living in Minnesota .... isn't that where the young adults can stay in public school until age 26?!?!??! I hope you saw that some of our " planning " was really just luck! Stef took courses when she started high school that came in handy later on. But many schools have work experience style programs, where kids " try out " different jobs ... as a way to familiarize themselves with what is involved and a way to see if they have the skills and desire to look further in those fields. Another good option for some is to look at what volunteer jobs are available at school (not talking about table cleaning here!) and start the students participating in those. School supply stores, office work, in house coffee shops, shelving books in the library ... look and see what opportunities are available in the school. Yep, high school and beyond pretty scarey. The future we always thought was so far off arrives pretty fast!! Cheryl in VA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 8, 2004 Report Share Posted October 8, 2004 > This next phase of his life is what has always scared me to death and now it is right around the corner and rapidly approaching. Same here Jackie - but 's next phase is middle school. This is a kid who doesn't handle transitions well. In addition to this big change, he will also be the only child at home. He'll only be there for 2 years, then he will move to the Intermediate School, which is right across the street. I can see him sneaking out and coming home! --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.773 / Virus Database: 520 - Release Date: 10/6/2004 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 8, 2004 Report Share Posted October 8, 2004 From where you are with 17 year old, you need to step back. Most of our children that age have hardly declared their adult personalitiies. Both my aspirations for Janet and hers have changed very much from that time. Jan wants to be a cop or a soldier or a rock star or a woman wrestler, even today if you ask her .. or even better a movie star. Of course I wanted to be an inventor as famous and successful as I thought Edison was. Because when Jan was 17, she was compliant and often a good worker, I missed the personality traits that make her a poor employee in the long run. She starts enthusiastically, but eventually is bored or decides to do things her way rather than the way her supervisor wants. She is just back to her independent life, and time will tell how things work out vocationally, but right now she is unemployed. This summer I went with Jan to Kingsley's 30th birthday party. It was an opportunity for me to see the kids I'd known up through late teens, but who I hadn't seen for a decade. They are still just as wonderful as adults as they were earlier. Their settings range from living at home to living in a group home. I think that Janet and Mitch Levitz are the only ones who have thier own apartments and Mitch is very close to his parents and Jan has a much needed few hours a week of life skills counselling. So far as I can tell, none of them is full time employed, but almost everyone has at least a part time or volunteer job. They are a happy group. The big adjustment you have in the next ten years seems to me one of your re-adjusting your sights. Most of the parents of the young adults I was with had much bigger aims for their children a decade ago. Today they are comfortable with where their kids/adults are. We want our kids to have the normal outcome we vision for all the other kids. Jobs, independence, marriage, and their own place. The reality is different, but it is a place where our kids are comfortable. I don't currently place much credibility on inspiring stories where the outcome isn't yet known. Often much of that is the dreams of the parents (picked up by their kids) and the reality over time turns out differently. In discussing adult outcomes with other parents, it has almost always gone much different from how we imagined it would. Still, it has gone well. Rick .. dad to Jan .. now 31 and back to health Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 9, 2004 Report Share Posted October 9, 2004 yes, in michigan you can attend school until you are 26. i know this because its where i live! lol anyway, my son ben (19ds) is still attending school and this year his class will be working at businesses in the community. last year he worked at pizza hut, the food bank and the local arc. they continue to work on life and academic skills also. by the way, ben spent the second week of sept in the hospital with pneumonia, bronchitis and fluid around his heart. they sent him home on oxygen, steroids, antibiotics, nebulizer treatments and visiting nurse services. his oxygen levels were quite low for a long time without oxygen so we had to continue with it. it has taken him a really long time to recover from being so sick. we are just now really seeing a huge difference in the congestion he has been having. to recap, was in the hospital from sept 14-20, sent home and three weeks later, finally well again (fingers crossed). if all goes well he will be back in school tuesday of next week. the nurse will be checking his pulse ox level at least twice a day and we are sending a portable backpack type oxygen tank with him just in case he is struggling. take care all, kerrie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 9, 2004 Report Share Posted October 9, 2004 No.....I think you're thinking of Michigan. Wasn't it Michigan where Amibel (?) moved so could go to school there and then they found out it really wasn't the right type of program for her? Joy Re: Ramblings about I think the time factor is one reason why I am so jealous of people living in Minnesota .... isn't that where the young adults can stay in public school until age 26?!?!??! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 9, 2004 Report Share Posted October 9, 2004 : What grade is in now? Nick's in 4th. He did 3 years of preschool, 1 year of kindergarten, 2 years of 1st grade, 1 year each of 2nd and 3rd grade. n County is giving me the we need to look at sending him to Barrackville (they wanted to do it this year but I said no keep him in his home school) since that is where they educate the kids that test Moderately to severely impaired. Nick is testing at the moderate level, though I feel he can do better if he wouldn't view tests as games. Gia Deasey (and others) stated their big concern is what to do with Nick at the Junior high level (7, 8 & 9 here) as the school he currently attends goes through 6th grade. I think they are pushing to send him to Barrackville because they can keep him in that school until he is 15 and technically age level with 10 graders. I hate it partly because he has done so well with the group of kids he is currently with and he does seem to mimic quite well that the thought of sending him into an environment with kids who may have lots of behaviors we don't want is scarey. Nick also has a hard time with change in his routine. When they have subs they see behavior from him they don't see on a daily basis. He also has problems with 'too many chiefs' trying to direct him (tends to shut down). If you give him a heads up to the change he sometimes responds better (less disruptive behaviors). Cari PS sorry to hijack the thread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 9, 2004 Report Share Posted October 9, 2004 Hi , You know, Depending on if you intend him to graduate with his class (same age) at about 17/18 you can do lots of things. is still in middle school...tho she was in 8th grade last year and she'll turn 15 this fall. We saw no reason to change her program at this time. We're not really sure we want to change it next year. (can you say comfy with how she;s progressing at this time? hehe, if i could I think I'd keep her in this classroom forever, lol, but that's not realistic) Maybe you can make a plan for that would eliminate one of the transitions by keeping him where he is longer and then transitioning to the intermediate school if that would be easier on everyone. Or maybe the middle school would be a good option for more then 2 yrs, but remember it's what you think would work best for . Never forget the I . :-) Joy PS what is an intermediate school? >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Same here Jackie - but 's next phase is middle school. This is a kid who doesn't handle transitions well. In addition to this big change, he will also be the only child at home. He'll only be there for 2 years, then he will move to the Intermediate School, which is right across the street. I can see him sneaking out and coming home! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 9, 2004 Report Share Posted October 9, 2004 > > PS what is an intermediate school? Well in our community, the intermediate school educates kids in 8th and 9th grade. Our area has grown so fast, that this school was originally designed to be a middle school, but the high school (which has undergone extensive expansion) could not handle all four grades. We are getting another new high school, 2 miles from the other one, and I'm betting that they turn this one into a middle school, which will be 2 miles from the other middle school, which will be expanded next year. Whew, talk about a long sentence! Glad to hear is doing well in her placement. I have no idea what we will do with next year. Part of me wants to see him move up with his peers, and the other part of me worries, realistically, that he can't handle it. I could always ask for a transition plan - it may not be a bad idea for him to go to the middle school for 1-2 hours a day next spring. --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.773 / Virus Database: 520 - Release Date: 10/7/2004 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 9, 2004 Report Share Posted October 9, 2004 This is what our school district did, . The would allow the students to spend about an hour once a week with the new teacher in the new building was transitioning to. has never had a hard time transitioning.....infact he was very ready to move on.....got tired of the same teacher faces....LOL. I would definately push for that if you can. Jackie -------------- Original message -------------- > > > > > > > PS what is an intermediate school? > > Well in our community, the intermediate school educates kids in 8th and 9th > grade. Our area has grown so fast, that this school was originally designed > to be a middle school, but the high school (which has undergone extensive > expansion) could not handle all four grades. We are getting another new > high school, 2 miles from the other one, and I'm betting that they turn this > one into a middle school, which will be 2 miles from the other middle > school, which will be expanded next year. Whew, talk about a long sentence! > > Glad to hear is doing well in her placement. I have no idea what we > will do with next year. Part of me wants to see him move up with > his peers, and the other part of me worries, realistically, that he can't > handle it. I could always ask for a transition plan - it may not be a bad > idea for him to go to the middle school for 1-2 hours a day next spring. > > > > > --- > Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. > Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). > Version: 6.0.773 / Virus Database: 520 - Release Date: 10/7/2004 > > > > > Click reply to all for messages to go to the list. Just hit reply for messages > to go to the sender of the message. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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