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Re: Krystal -- MY MIL IS A WITCH! (A long rant)

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In a message dated 3/29/2004 11:10:50 AM Central Standard Time,

krystal.monroe@... writes:

> When he

> finally came out she called to ask me " how retarded " he would be. Oh, and

> referred to him for several months as " the child " .

>

Such a sweet and caring Grandmother. Did you slap her teeth out? Sorry, but

I think I would have! If she asked me " How retarded is he? " , I would have

said, " He'll never be as retarded as you! " I'm not sure how old your son is,

but when she calls him " the child " , tell him to call her " the hag " !

I think you win the prize, you have an even worse MIL than I do. Should I

send congratulations or condolences? You know what, it is her loss! She's

going to miss out on all the " everyday miracles " our children show us. I feel

sorry for her and my MIL. Someday they will regret it.

Sue

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My mother is not as bad as my mother in law, but she does have problems

accepting Maverick and she is very critical of him.

A few years ago a grandma in our area started a support group for

Grandparents with special needs grandchildren. I suggested that my mom get

involved in

the group. The Grandmother who started it called her several times to invite

her, but she didn't.

I don't let Mav spend much time with her. I dread family functions when he

is so clearly trreated differently from the other grandchildren. But I

surround him with people who appreciate and applaud his accomplishments in life.

He

knows he is awesome. She doesn't, but he does.... (now WHO is the one who has

challenges?? LOL).

     ¸...¸ __/ /\____ ________

      ,·´º o`·,/__/ _/\_ //____/\

      ```)¨(´´´ | | | | | | | || |l±±±± |

      ¸,.-·²°´ ¸,.-·~·~·-.,¸ `°²·-. :º°

     As for me and my house,

      we will serve the Lord.

             24:15

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Well, I have referred to her as " the old bag of bones " since Ian was born (8

years ago this Monday!) which was pretty funny when my daughter (now 6)

began to talk and parrot that name back to her. I actually had to cut off

communication with the in-laws a couple of years ago, because she kept

cutting out articles from the paper on what I should have done to avoid

having a son with DS (eating more eggs and shellfish, according to this

article), and I finally just snapped. By then he was 5 and I was just

finished with a woman who professed to love him but still thinks of him as a

mistake. My husband takes the kids over for visits once a week, Ian one

week, Meg the next. He was taking them both at the same time but from what

my daughter would repeat to me I could tell that Ian was being ignored while

Meg got all the attention. So now they take turns and I insist that Steve

watch closely how Ian is treated. Also, I don't want Meg thinking it's ok

for him to be sidelined because he doesn't talk or whatever. Ian can tell

the difference between her and my mom, he doesn't initiate hugs or kisses

and seems to hold himself back from her, so I am spared the pain of watching

him ask for love and be rejected - that would be the hardest!

You are right, grandparents like these lose out on so much! I'd rather have

Ian the way he is than a " typical " child with a heart as cold as the MIL's.

Krystal

mom to Ian DS (8 on April 5th) and (6)

Re: Krystal -- MY MIL IS A WITCH! (A long rant)

In a message dated 3/29/2004 11:10:50 AM Central Standard Time,

krystal.monroe@... writes:

When he

finally came out she called to ask me " how retarded " he would be. Oh, and

referred to him for several months as " the child " .

Such a sweet and caring Grandmother. Did you slap her teeth out? Sorry,

but I think I would have! If she asked me " How retarded is he? " , I would

have said, " He'll never be as retarded as you! " I'm not sure how old your

son is, but when she calls him " the child " , tell him to call her " the hag " !

I think you win the prize, you have an even worse MIL than I do. Should I

send congratulations or condolences? You know what, it is her loss! She's

going to miss out on all the " everyday miracles " our children show us. I

feel sorry for her and my MIL. Someday they will regret it.

Sue

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In a message dated 3/31/2004 12:29:33 PM Eastern Standard Time,

krystal.monroe@... writes:

> with the in-laws a couple of years ago, because she kept

> cutting out articles from the paper on what I should have done to avoid

> having a son with DS (eating more eggs and shellfish,

> according to this

> article),

Gosh, that would make me want to send articles back to her in the mail ... how

to be a loving person, how to be a better grandparent, how to .. well you could

probably find 100 things to send her! ;-)

Cheryl in VA

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That is sad to hear, my parents treated my daughter that way when she was

born ,,telling me to put her up for adoption but now she is 11 and over the last

couple years she has become the apple of their eye and soul she brings it out

in everyone, a peace and love which is irreplaceable and only found in

children, and especially children who have a disability. My heart pulls for you,

because I know that feeling , but its them who miss out , that dont give our

kids

a chance but in return my daughter didnt care who would give her time if they

didnt she would just walk away!! But I made sure she got plenty of love at

home and a true bond with me, so she didnt really care if anyone else did! GIVE

plenty and he wont care what anyone else thinks is my thought!! She is now

very sure about herself ,talks to everyone but if they dont talk back she just

keeps moving, sometimes now at 11 she will ask personal questions, like what is

your name? Im ERIN!! THen they chuckle , smile and talk back,, usually!! There

are some who are too good about themselves and refuse to talk to a child with

ds?? But again its their loss as she brings a smile to everyone she meetss..

Jeanette

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