Re: Inclusion & Gender

[Guest guest]

Maverick is also very extroverted. He wants to be a part of the crowd and

that is a major advantage to inclusion. My foster daughter didn't have that

desire and while she spent most of her time in the reg ed class, she didn't

really try to connect with any of the kids.

Also, as Eliane said, it's a team effort. I tell my husband all the time that

there is NO WAY I could work AND have Maverick successfully fully included.

It takes alot of work at home, to help them, and at school to moniter them.

I don't know that it is so much a gender thing, as it is just the right team

and ...well....a pushy parent or two. (Not that I consider myself

pushy.....LOL....but THEY do!)

Oh, and as for the behavior..... remember, POSITIVE, POSITIVE, POSITIVE!

Maverick is not a placid kid. He has a very strong will and you need to know

how

to manipulate it to what you want him to be doing. I will NOT allow them to

use behavior as an excuse for things not working. We are constantly

readjusting his behavior program and I am constantly needing to remind them to

PRAISE... " Oh, he's having a bad day? PRAISE HIM MORE!! "

Right now he is having a very hard time with our 10 yr old foster daughter

leaving. She was with us for 11 months and Mav, my 10 yr old and my 7 yr old

all had the most wonderful bond to each other. Maverick is showing his pain

with anger, both at home and at school. UGH! I just keep reminding them (and

myself) that it will pass.

[Guest guest]

Hi,

Actually, before I read 's and Elaine's reply, I was just gonna say that

amanda is such a social butterfly- but they concur about their sons. How

about other males that have been very successful- Burke comes to mind and

Levitz? is in a theater group with young adults most of whom

have DS and both the males and females are extremely talented and creative and

they all have pretty productive jobs.

I think we/you have to offer our kids the best of all worlds and hope beyond

hope for the best. And now I'm discovering this balance between an inclusive

world for amanda and another one where she feels comfortable and wants to be

with people who are more like her than not.

~ Mom to 13 DS and Diabetes Type 1 and 9 NY

PS - you did miss the buddy walk, right????????

[Guest guest]

is an extrovert in the EXTREME. That is one reason it worked for him.

Another was caring teachers who were willing to give it a try and modified

curricula (plural of curriculum) very well. Also, he always had a one-on-one

para in the regular classroom. She wasn't superglued to him and helped all

children so the reg. ed. teacher enjoyed her help. She also made sure he was on

task and helped modify some things the other kids were doing. We also made sure

he did every part of his homework. It takes a team and support. It was NOT

dumping. He had behaviors but we had a very good behavior plan in place each

year. The behaviors got better the more he was exposed to appropriate behavior.

His language got better as well. I do think teachers tend to focus on kids with

special needs more and therefore notice EVERY little behavior that they would

ignore with typical kids. Not just an humble opinion, witnessed first hand as a

parapro.

Elaine

Inclusion & Gender

After reading the posts on 'Graduating ' and inclusion I started

thinking. I thought about the young people I 'know' from this list and the

other and

how far they got without or before they went to special ed, particularly

those who get to middle school and beyond. Does it seem to anyone else that

in

general girls seem to do better in inclusive environments? Of course there

are

exceptions ( Elaine's son , Pam's son , 's son Mav) and I

cling to their successes. I then started trying to figure out why. For Liam

I

know it will be his behavior that gets in the way. I remember going to a

seminar where the speaker mentioned that behavior problems are jumped on by

administrators to try and force kids out of inclusive environments.

I wonder if anyone has put together statistics. Any thoughts?

Kathy, Liam's mom( 5)

[Guest guest]

I agree that administrators jump on any behavior issue with a child with

special needs and yet in my son's classroom there has been a child two years

running (typical???) who has punched, kicked jumped on and off tables etc,

and just generally disrupted the class. I guess emotional problems don't

count if your IQ is okay. But when it is our kids that is what is usually

jumped on to keep them out of inclusion. A double standard. You betcha.

As far as boys are concerned. All boys are more apt to be physical, it's

called testosterone lol!!!

Loree

Inclusion & Gender

>

> After reading the posts on 'Graduating ' and inclusion I started

> thinking. I thought about the young people I 'know' from this list and

the other and

> how far they got without or before they went to special ed, particularly

> those who get to middle school and beyond. Does it seem to anyone else

that in

> general girls seem to do better in inclusive environments? Of course

there are

> exceptions ( Elaine's son , Pam's son , 's son Mav) and I

> cling to their successes. I then started trying to figure out why. For

Liam I

> know it will be his behavior that gets in the way. I remember going to a

> seminar where the speaker mentioned that behavior problems are jumped on

by

> administrators to try and force kids out of inclusive environments.

>

> I wonder if anyone has put together statistics. Any thoughts?

>

> Kathy, Liam's mom( 5)

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I would go so far as to say that in GENERAL all girls do better in a school

environment. (Of course there are plenty of exceptions - I have 2 rather low-key

boys.) But overall who is better suited for sitting quietly, writing nicely,

paying atttention to detail, etc.? I look at my sons' classes and think how hard

it is for some of those boys to just sit quietly for a few minutes. This is not

to say, of course, that girls are smarter or make better grades - just that they

behave better and handle school better. Whenever I have taught Vacation Bible

School - ALMOST all my problems came from boys. Just my 2 cents. in Dallas

Inclusion & Gender

After reading the posts on 'Graduating ' and inclusion I started

thinking. I thought about the young people I 'know' from this list and the

other and

how far they got without or before they went to special ed, particularly

those who get to middle school and beyond. Does it seem to anyone else that

in

general girls seem to do better in inclusive environments? Of course there

are

exceptions ( Elaine's son , Pam's son , 's son Mav) and I

cling to their successes. I then started trying to figure out why. For Liam

I

know it will be his behavior that gets in the way. I remember going to a

seminar where the speaker mentioned that behavior problems are jumped on by

administrators to try and force kids out of inclusive environments.

I wonder if anyone has put together statistics. Any thoughts?

Kathy, Liam's mom( 5)

[Guest guest]

I have noticed that in both my daughter's 3rd grade and my son's 2nd grade

classes, the ratio of boys to girls is about 65% to 35%. I feel for those

teachers!

I wonder if that is just in our community?

Darcy

Inclusion & Gender

After reading the posts on 'Graduating ' and inclusion I started

thinking. I thought about the young people I 'know' from this list and the

other and

how far they got without or before they went to special ed, particularly

those who get to middle school and beyond. Does it seem to anyone else that

in

general girls seem to do better in inclusive environments? Of course there

are

exceptions ( Elaine's son , Pam's son , 's son Mav) and I

cling to their successes. I then started trying to figure out why. For

Liam I

know it will be his behavior that gets in the way. I remember going to a

seminar where the speaker mentioned that behavior problems are jumped on by

administrators to try and force kids out of inclusive environments.

I wonder if anyone has put together statistics. Any thoughts?

Kathy, Liam's mom( 5)

[Guest guest]

There is a good deal of research that suggests that girls are more suited to

the traditional classroom than boys.

I have seen the same thing most years with my younger son's classes (5th

grade)--more boys than girls here too. And when (14) was in early

intervention, there were always more boys than girls in those, and that was

in two different states and we live in a third now.

Re: Inclusion & Gender

I have noticed that in both my daughter's 3rd grade and my son's 2nd grade

classes, the ratio of boys to girls is about 65% to 35%. I feel for those

teachers!

I wonder if that is just in our community?

Darcy

Inclusion & Gender

After reading the posts on 'Graduating ' and inclusion I started

thinking. I thought about the young people I 'know' from this list and

the other and

how far they got without or before they went to special ed, particularly

those who get to middle school and beyond. Does it seem to anyone else

that in

general girls seem to do better in inclusive environments? Of course

there are

exceptions ( Elaine's son , Pam's son , 's son Mav) and

I

cling to their successes. I then started trying to figure out why. For

Liam I

know it will be his behavior that gets in the way. I remember going to

a

seminar where the speaker mentioned that behavior problems are jumped on

by

administrators to try and force kids out of inclusive environments.

I wonder if anyone has put together statistics. Any thoughts?

Kathy, Liam's mom( 5)

[Guest guest]

asks specifically about Burke and Levitz re

inclusion.

Burke was really on the very front-side of education, starting

school before our kids were really allowed an education. It is a credit

to his parents and many others that he has come to the top as an actor

and spokesperson. It has also taken a great deal of training as an

adult and supervision to make him as effective as he is.

Levitz did get a regent's diploma, but he was in the same sped

environment as Janet went through a couple of years behind. We used

many of the same teachers and the envrionment, while open and with

classes with the regular kids, was simply now what we talk about today

as inclusion. His Mom was very helpful in networking to find good sped

classes and teachers. It was quality education within a special

education system that did allow true independent education programs

truly tailored to the individual. Mitch's parents and grandfather had a

great deal to do with supporting and tutoring him to get the real NY

high school diploma. It involved a lot of stress and setbacks along the

way, but the aim was achieved. Jan got a fhigh school diploma, but not

the regent's one. If it had been a different year, she wouldn't have

gotten one, but they were giving them to the sped kids the year she

graduated.

Few of the 'poster adults' of the NDSS and NDSC were educated in

inclusive envrionments. All had a great deal of family support as well

as personalities that kept them motivated. One has to be careful not to

overly credit their achievements. Often there is an incredible amount

of on-going help and support behind their accomplishments and it is

sometimes hard to separate the support from the achievements.

The bottom line is that we should not be measuring our kids by some

competitive level. Each of them is an individual and each has their own

accomplishments (and issues). We need to help develop our children to a

state as adults where they can have happy and satisfying lives and not

to some life ideal or model that may stressful or even very unsatisfying

when achieved. We need to love and enjoy them for who they are.

We still occasionally talk about whether the rather ambitious post high

school programs Jan has been through have been the best path. While she

has achieved a lot, perhaps more modest aims might have been more

comfortable for her in the long run. We do not have regrets, but we do

review things.

Rick ... dad to 30 year old Jan .. ds .. but maybe with AML getting

cured

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 10/23/2003 11:57:55 AM Eastern Daylight Time,

lowenthalrj@... writes:

> There is a good deal of research that suggests that girls

> are more suited to

> the traditional classroom than boys.

I've always thought this. I used to tease my son all the time that girls were

smarter than boys ... drove him crazy! At his high school graduation I had to

point out to him that there were many more girls sitting in the honor graduate

section than boys .... not that he objected being surrounded by girls at

graduation! ;-)

Cheryl in VA

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 10/23/03 9:00:19 AM, karenmotes@... writes:

<< I would go so far as to say that in GENERAL all girls do better in a

school environment. >>

Sorry, but I beg to differ with you- what about all the really smart, well

educated males in the world??? My son, nds not being an excpetion. he is a

model student and so are many of his friends who really love and do well in

school.

That is just a sterotype ww2

[Guest guest]

I like both worlds myself. is included this year in art and p.e. I

would like to have more but the high school is on the block system and there

isn't much time for academics. I think this class spends too much time on voc.

ed. for me. I may work on the IEP. swims with the regular YMCA swim

team along with his best friend (also with DS). He loves all the kids and

especially loves having around. I wish there were girls in his sped class

though.

I think boys tend to test limits more than girls. Some girls are

exceptions of course, but that is what I see. Testerone and compliance don't go

together IMHO:))

Elaine

Re: Inclusion & Gender

Hi,

Actually, before I read 's and Elaine's reply, I was just gonna say that

amanda is such a social butterfly- but they concur about their sons. How

about other males that have been very successful- Burke comes to mind

and

Levitz? is in a theater group with young adults most of whom

have DS and both the males and females are extremely talented and creative and

they all have pretty productive jobs.

I think we/you have to offer our kids the best of all worlds and hope beyond

hope for the best. And now I'm discovering this balance between an inclusive

world for amanda and another one where she feels comfortable and wants to be

with people who are more like her than not.

~ Mom to 13 DS and Diabetes Type 1 and 9 NY

PS - you did miss the buddy walk, right????????

[Guest guest]

I think boys tend to test limits more than girls. Some girls are exceptions

of course, but that is what I see. Testerone and compliance don't go

together IMHO:))

Elaine

Neither do estrogen and compliance. As a mother of an exception (see

above), I am ready to pull my hair out. 's favorite expression is " I

don't like it " . Or just moaning, rolling her eyes, and stomping off. Our

neighborhood's Mom's Nite Out is this coming Tuesday, and it is margarita

special night at Habanero's. Don't have to ask me twice! )

Sharon H.

Mom to , (12, DS) and , (8)

South Carolina