Guest guest Posted July 20, 2003 Report Share Posted July 20, 2003 , The reason they told you that it feels like a horse kicking you in the chest, is because people that have been zapped use that expression. Of course it’s not exactly like being kicked by a horse; it’s only an analogy. I can’t think of anything that describes that better. The big difference is that a horse will do extensive damage if you are kicked in the chest by one. With an ICD, there’s no damage, no bruising, and if I remember correctly, no pain. But, you feel like a large, invisible animal has kicked you in the chest. I think I remember a feeling like a hard shove, or maybe even a kick in the chest when the ICD fired. It’s kinda like a New Mexico horse; not a NC horse. <g>. The big thing to remember is that there is no residual pain. It’s mostly a surprised feeling. No harm done. It’s a lifesaver. Norm -----Original Message----- From: m1555@... [mailto:m1555@...] Sent: Saturday, July 19, 2003 12:21 PM Subject: Re: Soc: Horse Kickin' I didn't mean to get people upset when I said they told me it would be or might be like a horse kicked me in the chest. Really, that is just a figure of speech which in reality means it might hurt a lot and then again it might not. I just don't know what to expect and I do understand that everyone is different. It has been a week and a half and I only had to take pain pills the first night where other people take them for weeks. I think it has a lot to do with how your health is otherwise and your mental attitude. I'm too much of a spit fire to let things get me down very long. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 20, 2003 Report Share Posted July 20, 2003 But Norm, that's my point. Your description of what it feels like for you is vastly different from what it feels like for me. I feel it most in the back of my head not in my chest. And I would not say it is painfree, especially afterward. I really believe we all feel electricity differently and it all depends on our individual bodies' resistance. Bridget > , > > The reason they told you that it feels like a horse kicking you in the > chest, is because people that have been zapped use that expression. Of > course it's not exactly like being kicked by a horse; it's only an analogy. > I can't think of anything that describes that better. The big difference is > that a horse will do extensive damage if you are kicked in the chest by one. > With an ICD, there's no damage, no bruising, and if I remember correctly, no > pain. But, you feel like a large, invisible animal has kicked you in the > chest. I think I remember a feeling like a hard shove, or maybe even a kick > in the chest when the ICD fired. It's kinda like a New Mexico horse; not a > NC horse. <g>. The big thing to remember is that there is no residual pain. > It's mostly a surprised feeling. No harm done. It's a lifesaver. > > Norm > > Re: Soc: Horse Kickin' > > I didn't mean to get people upset when I said they told me it would be or > might be like a horse kicked me in the chest. Really, that is just a figure > of speech which in reality means it might hurt a lot and then again it > might not. I just don't know what to expect and I do understand that > everyone > is different. It has been a week and a half and I only had to take pain > pills > the first night where other people take them for weeks. I think it has a lot > to do with how your health is otherwise and your mental attitude. I'm too > much of a spit fire to let things get me down very long. > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 20, 2003 Report Share Posted July 20, 2003 Becca, You didn't upset me. I have learned to not let little things upset me as life is too short. The EP that put in my defibrillator doesn't even want to see me unless its an emergency which is fine with me as I like my cardiologist a lot better. Don't get me wrong the EP was nice but I just don't feel that him or his staff gave me very much information as I had a lot of questions that he didn't answer but my cardiologist did and he even gave me some literature. Some doctors can be so insensitive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 21, 2003 Report Share Posted July 21, 2003 Dear Group, OK, so I want to stick my two cents in here. I am sure if I have followed all this correctly but I think I got it. Ben having those befuddled days. What does my ICD feel like to me when it shocks? Well, lets me go back to the beginning. My first icd from ages ago, hurt like hell. The first time it fired I was in the mall with my daughter who was then 16 and I thought that I had been shot. I screamed out and then before you know what I slumped to the floor passes out. When I came to there were hundreds of people around and I was embarrassed and trying to explain. I just wanted to get up and get the heck out of the mall. Thank God my daughter had just learned to drive. I was OK physically but emotional I was a reck. First I realized I could have been dead and I thank God I was still alive and then I realized how much I owed to that little thing in my chest, but at the same time I hated realizing that I didn't have control over my own body. Maybe that is the hardest part to accept. You have no control when or where it will happen and you pray that it will when you need it but at the same time you dread it. The second time it fired I was standing in my hallway handing my son his jacket. My husband was doing some wood working putting some shelves up on the wall and he walked past me and I thought he had hit me with the 2x4 he was carrying it knocked me to the ground and my knee went out of place. The next time my ICD went off. I was with my other son and we were jus standing still talking and I thought Sammy Sosa I had a homer into my chest. I went down and then out. But for me it didn't end there my unit kept firing every three minutes for 5 hours until I was life flighted to Cleveland Clinic. I cannot tell you how crazy I was and how much it terrified me and my whole family. It was such a new procedure that Akron General had no idea how to help me or shut it off. It was so badly damaged and I was too that it could not be fixed or repaired. Because of other serious problems and the damage it did from firing so often I could not get a new one right away. For those of you who know my soap opera life you know that I hid, I hid from the truth I hid from life I hid from doctors until that famous day in July of 1999. When I came to in the hospital Dr, Gordon was there standing over me saying it time Sharon we can wait no longer if you want to go on living you must have a new ICD or you'll never see your daughter married. Long story short after a week of therapy and my family and my pastor and the entire floor of the hospital talking to me day and night I agreed. Dr Klieman did the surgery and he promised that nothing would go wrong wrong awrong. Had the surgery was out of the hospital in a week? I was just in time for my daughters wedding She was married Aug 8, 1999. I was sore but very much there. Two weeks later I awoke to my new ICD firing every time I coughed, memories came flooding back I was scared to death. There was a mule on a rampage in my chest. Went to the hospital the Medtronic rep and doctors where there in an instant and guess what it was defective. I lost it I wanted the darn thing taken out and thrown in the trash. Dr Kleiman locked eyes with me and said I truly sorry I don't know how this happened but I give you my word I will fix this and it will never happen again. His word came true. My ICD has worked properly ever since. I on the other hand have not. I think somewhere between one and two I lost my mind and never found it on my journey back. I lived in constant fear that it would break or just start firing. I ended up with a shrink and some medicine to calm me down. Well, here it is July of 2003, still hate having a Icd in my chest. I still hate not having control. I hate getting shocked. I hate the feeling no matter how you describe it. I hate passing out I hate the bruises I get from falling down. Ihate not being able to drive. I hate many aspects of my life. But, then as of a month ago when it slammed me to the floor again. I set up and started to cry then there was like this replay in my mind and I heard someone saying hay you ICD Woman look your still here nothing is broken your OK pride was a bit insulted but I alive I am OK for right know I am everything I need to be. I am here, I can see my garden. I can here my grand children laugh. I can go to the Zoo with them. I can go camping and watch them grow and read to them. Because I have this crazy ICD I saw my daughter walk down the aisle. I watched my very first granddaughter and held her just minutes after she was born. I saw my baby girl holding her baby girl and her husband holding them which is a sight that makes anything worth while. Last September I saw my son marry a beautiful girl and start a new life. In just a couple of months I will be there when they have there fit child. I have sewed and cross stitched. I have seen the moon and the stars I have lost friends. I recent lost a very dear friend so no I must live for the two of us. I owe all this to a little machine that kicks like a mule. Small Price to pay I think. We all adjust in our own time and in our own way, some easier than others. Some just take right to it. Some need to go on the roller coaster. There long winded and all but a lot of two cents Sharon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 21, 2003 Report Share Posted July 21, 2003 Thanks Norm for all the rest of you let me tell you it has been a very long haul and I would have never made it except for this group. I remember the day I wonder in here and just started babbling and a there were people who picked me up and let me cry but stood beside me and when I was so down I couldn't think straight they made me laugh. We are all here together like some of you or not. Each of us will travel our own road emotional and mentally and physically but we all share one goal and that is to survive with our Icd's to the best of our ability. In 1999 I could never have said that but today in 2003 I can. Thanks group how about a big group hug. Love Sharon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 21, 2003 Report Share Posted July 21, 2003 Sharon, Thank you for sharing your experience. I am a newbie to the ICD. Be two weeks this Wednesday and I have no idea what is ahead of me but with the help of this group I am sure that I will make it just fine. The only problem I have right now is that I am blister where they had taped the bandage over my incision and it really stings a lot. Of course I am still sore and I realize I will be for a while. Any time they cut your body it is a major shock to your system. I feel like the ICD is an insurance policy to help keep me alive until my number is really up which is a long time off or at least I hope so as I have to much living to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 21, 2003 Report Share Posted July 21, 2003 Norm, Thanks for the advice. I have to call my cardiologist about some medicine he took me off so I will mention it to him and see if he can suggest something to stop the sting. I have tried several different things but nothing seems to help. It wouldn’t hurt if you called your physician, and explained about the blistering. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 21, 2003 Report Share Posted July 21, 2003 That was beautiful, Sharon. I’m happy for you, that you have reconciled that your ICD enables you to see and feel all those little things that are so satisfying in life. How unfortunate that you had defective ICDs in the past. I hope your future will be bright. How could it be otherwise, with your children starting families and grandchildren for you to love. Norm -----Original Message----- From: IIPistacio@... [mailto:IIPistacio@...] Sent: Monday, July 21, 2003 8:29 AM Subject: Re: Re: Soc: Horse Kickin' Dear Group, OK, so I want to stick my two cents in here. I am sure if I have followed all this correctly but I think I got it. Ben having those befuddled days. What does my ICD feel like to me when it shocks? Well, lets me go back to the beginning. My first icd from ages ago, hurt like hell. The first time it fired I was in the mall with my daughter who was then 16 and I thought that I had been shot. I screamed out and then before you know what I slumped to the floor passes out. When I came to there were hundreds of people around and I was embarrassed and trying to explain. I just wanted to get up and get the heck out of the mall. Thank God my daughter had just learned to drive. I was OK physically but emotional I was a reck. First I realized I could have been dead and I thank God I was still alive and then I realized how much I owed to that little thing in my chest, but at the same time I hated realizing that I didn't have control over my own body. Maybe that is the hardest part to accept. You have no control when or where it will happen and you pray that it will when you need it but at the same time you dread it. The second time it fired I was standing in my hallway handing my son his jacket. My husband was doing some wood working putting some shelves up on the wall and he walked past me and I thought he had hit me with the 2x4 he was carrying it knocked me to the ground and my knee went out of place. The next time my ICD went off. I was with my other son and we were jus standing still talking and I thought Sammy Sosa I had a homer into my chest. I went down and then out. But for me it didn't end there my unit kept firing every three minutes for 5 hours until I was life flighted to Cleveland Clinic. I cannot tell you how crazy I was and how much it terrified me and my whole family. It was such a new procedure that Akron General had no idea how to help me or shut it off. It was so badly damaged and I was too that it could not be fixed or repaired. Because of other serious problems and the damage it did from firing so often I could not get a new one right away. For those of you who know my soap opera life you know that I hid, I hid from the truth I hid from life I hid from doctors until that famous day in July of 1999. When I came to in the hospital Dr, Gordon was there standing over me saying it time Sharon we can wait no longer if you want to go on living you must have a new ICD or you'll never see your daughter married. Long story short after a week of therapy and my family and my pastor and the entire floor of the hospital talking to me day and night I agreed. Dr Klieman did the surgery and he promised that nothing would go wrong wrong awrong. Had the surgery was out of the hospital in a week? I was just in time for my daughters wedding She was married Aug 8, 1999. I was sore but very much there. Two weeks later I awoke to my new ICD firing every time I coughed, memories came flooding back I was scared to death. There was a mule on a rampage in my chest. Went to the hospital the Medtronic rep and doctors where there in an instant and guess what it was defective. I lost it I wanted the darn thing taken out and thrown in the trash. Dr Kleiman locked eyes with me and said I truly sorry I don't know how this happened but I give you my word I will fix this and it will never happen again. His word came true. My ICD has worked properly ever since. I on the other hand have not. I think somewhere between one and two I lost my mind and never found it on my journey back. I lived in constant fear that it would break or just start firing. I ended up with a shrink and some medicine to calm me down. Well, here it is July of 2003, still hate having a Icd in my chest. I still hate not having control. I hate getting shocked. I hate the feeling no matter how you describe it. I hate passing out I hate the bruises I get from falling down. Ihate not being able to drive. I hate many aspects of my life. But, then as of a month ago when it slammed me to the floor again. I set up and started to cry then there was like this replay in my mind and I heard someone saying hay you ICD Woman look your still here nothing is broken your OK pride was a bit insulted but I alive I am OK for right know I am everything I need to be. I am here, I can see my garden. I can here my grand children laugh. I can go to the Zoo with them. I can go camping and watch them grow and read to them. Because I have this crazy ICD I saw my daughter walk down the aisle. I watched my very first granddaughter and held her just minutes after she was born. I saw my baby girl holding her baby girl and her husband holding them which is a sight that makes anything worth while. Last September I saw my son marry a beautiful girl and start a new life. In just a couple of months I will be there when they have there fit child. I have sewed and cross stitched. I have seen the moon and the stars I have lost friends. I recent lost a very dear friend so no I must live for the two of us. I owe all this to a little machine that kicks like a mule. Small Price to pay I think. We all adjust in our own time and in our own way, some easier than others. Some just take right to it. Some need to go on the roller coaster. There long winded and all but a lot of two cents Sharon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 21, 2003 Report Share Posted July 21, 2003 All t his group will ask of you to to do your best and live well. I am not sure if you can use t his on your incision but what help me wre tucks. But you better check with your Dr.. Sharon in Ohio Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 21, 2003 Report Share Posted July 21, 2003 Sharon; What inspiration and so beautifully written. Just these words can help so many... YOU are awesome. I ca say that because I have gotten to know your life story over the last few years. ~guin IIPistacio@... wrote: Dear Group, OK, so I want to stick my two cents in here. I am sure if I have followed all this correctly but I think I got it. Ben having those befuddled days. What does my ICD feel like to me when it shocks? Well, lets me go back to the beginning. My first icd from ages ago, hurt like hell. The first time it fired I was in the mall with my daughter who was then 16 and I thought that I had been shot. I screamed out and then before you know what I slumped to the floor passes out. When I came to there were hundreds of people around and I was embarrassed and trying to explain. I just wanted to get up and get the heck out of the mall. Thank God my daughter had just learned to drive. I was OK physically but emotional I was a reck. First I realized I could have been dead and I thank God I was still alive and then I realized how much I owed to that little thing in my chest, but at the same time I hated realizing that I didn't have control over my own body. Maybe that is the hardest part to accept. You have no control when or where it will happen and you pray that it will when you need it but at the same time you dread it. The second time it fired I was standing in my hallway handing my son his jacket. My husband was doing some wood working putting some shelves up on the wall and he walked past me and I thought he had hit me with the 2x4 he was carrying it knocked me to the ground and my knee went out of place. The next time my ICD went off. I was with my other son and we were jus standing still talking and I thought Sammy Sosa I had a homer into my chest. I went down and then out. But for me it didn't end there my unit kept firing every three minutes for 5 hours until I was life flighted to Cleveland Clinic. I cannot tell you how crazy I was and how much it terrified me and my whole family. It was such a new procedure that Akron General had no idea how to help me or shut it off. It was so badly damaged and I was too that it could not be fixed or repaired. Because of other serious problems and the damage it did from firing so often I could not get a new one right away. For those of you who know my soap opera life you know that I hid, I hid from the truth I hid from life I hid from doctors until that famous day in July of 1999. When I came to in the hospital Dr, Gordon was there standing over me saying it time Sharon we can wait no longer if you want to go on living you must have a new ICD or you'll never see your daughter married. Long story short after a week of therapy and my family and my pastor and the entire floor of the hospital talking to me day and night I agreed. Dr Klieman did the surgery and he promised that nothing would go wrong wrong awrong. Had the surgery was out of the hospital in a week? I was just in time for my daughters wedding She was married Aug 8, 1999. I was sore but very much there. Two weeks later I awoke to my new ICD firing every time I coughed, memories came flooding back I was scared to death. There was a mule on a rampage in my chest. Went to the hospital the Medtronic rep and doctors where there in an instant and guess what it was defective. I lost it I wanted the darn thing taken out and thrown in the trash. Dr Kleiman locked eyes with me and said I truly sorry I don't know how this happened but I give you my word I will fix this and it will never happen again. His word came true. My ICD has worked properly ever since. I on the other hand have not. I think somewhere between one and two I lost my mind and never found it on my journey back. I lived in constant fear that it would break or just start firing. I ended up with a shrink and some medicine to calm me down. Well, here it is July of 2003, still hate having a Icd in my chest. I still hate not having control. I hate getting shocked. I hate the feeling no matter how you describe it. I hate passing out I hate the bruises I get from falling down. Ihate not being able to drive. I hate many aspects of my life. But, then as of a month ago when it slammed me to the floor again. I set up and started to cry then there was like this replay in my mind and I heard someone saying hay you ICD Woman look your still here nothing is broken your OK pride was a bit insulted but I alive I am OK for right know I am everything I need to be. I am here, I can see my garden. I can here my grand children laugh. I can go to the Zoo with them. I can go camping and watch them grow and read to them. Because I have this crazy ICD I saw my daughter walk down the aisle. I watched my very first granddaughter and held her just minutes after she was born. I saw my baby girl holding her baby girl and her husband holding them which is a sight that makes anything worth while. Last September I saw my son marry a beautiful girl and start a new life. In just a couple of months I will be there when they have there fit child. I have sewed and cross stitched. I have seen the moon and the stars I have lost friends. I recent lost a very dear friend so no I must live for the two of us. I owe all this to a little machine that kicks like a mule. Small Price to pay I think. We all adjust in our own time and in our own way, some easier than others. Some just take right to it. Some need to go on the roller coaster. There long winded and all but a lot of two cents Sharon Please visit the Zapper homepage at http://www.ZapLife.org Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 21, 2003 Report Share Posted July 21, 2003 , An allergy to some adhesive tapes is not unusual, and usually manifests itself with blisters under the tape. I just had my ICD replaced. The surgeon said that I should remove the bandage in one week. Often, people can tolerate paper and silk tape, where the cloth kind causes an allergic reaction. It wouldn’t hurt if you called your physician, and explained about the blistering. Norm -----Original Message----- From: m1555@... [mailto:m1555@...] Sent: Monday, July 21, 2003 12:08 PM Subject: Re: Re: Soc: Horse Kickin' Sharon, Thank you for sharing your experience. I am a newbie to the ICD. Be two weeks this Wednesday and I have no idea what is ahead of me but with the help of this group I am sure that I will make it just fine. The only problem I have right now is that I am blister where they had taped the bandage over my incision and it really stings a lot. Of course I am still sore and I realize I will be for a while. Any time they cut your body it is a major shock to your system. I feel like the ICD is an insurance policy to help keep me alive until my number is really up which is a long time off or at least I hope so as I have to much living to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 21, 2003 Report Share Posted July 21, 2003 My EP said the device is my insurance - that it should keep me going another 3 -5 years without a transplant. He thinks there will be advances made in the next 3 - 5 years that maybe a transplant would not be needed. I have had my ICD for 4 and 1/2 months without any shock. My doc put me way under during the procedure- said I was talking too much - so I haven't experienced the phantom shocks or have any memory of the testing or implant. Tommy -----Original Message-----From: m1555@... [mailto:m1555@...]Sent: Monday, July 21, 2003 1:08 PM Subject: Re: Re: Soc: Horse Kickin'Sharon,Thank you for sharing your experience. I am a newbie to the ICD. Be twoweeks this Wednesday and I have no idea what is ahead of me but withthe help of this group I am sure that I will make it just fine. The onlyproblem I have right now is that I am blister where they had taped thebandage over my incision and it really stings a lot. Of course I am stillsore and I realize I will be for a while. Any time they cut your body itis a major shock to your system. I feel like the ICD is an insurancepolicy to help keep me alive until my number is really up which is a long time off or at least I hope so as I have to much living to do.Please visit the Zapper homepage athttp://www.ZapLife.org Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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