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In a message dated 1/6/2003 3:07:09 PM US Mountain Standard Time,

shippahoy@... writes:

> kids but know

> that if the kids are adopted and raised by adoptive parents that they

> will get the services like medical care and money for adapted things

> they may need and diapers and wipies for kids over potty training age.I

> don't know why they don't help by- birth parents but by-adoption parents

> they bend over backwards for.

Not true here.

We are the adoptive parents of 5 children, 3 of them special needs and we

aren't getting anything more than the rest of the sp needs parents.

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,

You are right. I am all for subsidies if the children have special needs, but

those of us who are raising our biological special needs children basically get

very little assistance. Our only assistance is 's special education

services. Everything else is done through private insurance and copays. The

only thing that I would really like to have and that my insurances won't pay for

is for someone to come into the home and work with us - also consult with the

school and daycare. If had medicaid, I could get that without jumping

through hoops. There is a possibility that I could get this now through his

IEP, but then it would go through our local family assessment family team, which

my supervisor serves on.

As far as developmental disabilities, I have two kids on my caseload whose needs

are greater than s. Most of the other children have been affected

socially and emotionally - not to mention being taken away from their biological

families. If ever had to go into care (and if anything happened to Tim

and I - this could happen b/c we don't have anyone who would take him), his

adoptive parents would get everything through subsidy - including a darm

stroller that I often dream of having.

I wish those who are most vulnerable would be served appropriately. We live in

a state that is near the bottom as far as services to the MR population goes.

We pay thousands of dollars a year in taxes - yet I doubt $1 goes towards the

MR/DD population :(

Services for kids

It is a shame they don't help families with special kids more.I know

there are some families that want to raise their special kids but know

that if the kids are adopted and raised by adoptive parents that they

will get the services like medical care and money for adapted things

they may need and diapers and wipies for kids over potty training age.I

don't know why they don't help by- birth parents but by-adoption parents

they bend over backwards for.The kids get everything (Mostly ) and since

there is adoption assistance to meet the childs needs, there is no worry

over money.It is really unfair to by-birth families .I have really seen

them struggle and feel awful they don't get more help for the kids.

Somebody has to do something to help these parents.I see them working so

hard to try to provide the best for their kids when just a little help

from a program,any program would help these families.Especially the

single moms out there.They are the unsung heroes of America.But somebody

needs to help the parents who want to parent their special needs child

and give them the services they need without making them feel like they

are begging.

I personally do not think we need a space program.What for?I'm not going

to the moon to live,or any other planet.Just because we have the

technology to go there and take soil samples and millions of pictures

should we?And why are we giving all this money to third world countries

when our children need it.

These countries don't even pay us back. And why don't those that should

speak out do it? Because they are working so many jobs that they don't

have the time.We help everybody.Why don't we help our own people first?

We are important,we love our country,american kids count.If we are the

greatest country in the world then why are some of our kids and families

suffering the most???

And why is there so much hoopla about sports in schools.I think too

much money is spent on that.We need a science program for special kids

in our schools more than we need sports.

Our is 12.He has ds but he loves science.He and I just put

together a planetarium over the weekend.It was fun.It also has the sun

in the middle with all the planets revolving around it.We accurately

painted the planets.My husband and I are thinking about starting a

science club for kids who are not getting it in school.They would have

fun with it.

Thanks for letting me vent. wife of mom to

,Kristi, and

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Do you ever wonder if society is going down the path that will punish parents

that choose to have children with disabilities rather than abort them ...

because of the costs that are involved in supporting those children and adults?

I really don't believe services and funding is going to improve for people with

disabilities. If people like Singer influence college students and others

in our society, I think things will just get worse.

Cheryl in VA (one of the worst states for support services to people with

disabilities)

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I think that already happens, if not as overtly as it might. There seems to

be a lingering attitude that parents of children with and people with d/a

" suffer " and it seems to be an attitude that they <should> suffer--like they

need to be made to if they don't evidence sufficient levels in the eyes of

some.

Judi

Re: Services for kids

Do you ever wonder if society is going down the path that will punish

parents that choose to have children with disabilities rather than abort

them ... because of the costs that are involved in supporting those children

and adults?

I really don't believe services and funding is going to improve for people

with disabilities. If people like Singer influence college students

and others in our society, I think things will just get worse.

Cheryl in VA (one of the worst states for support services to people with

disabilities)

Click reply to all for messages to go to the list. Just hit reply for

messages to go to the sender of the message.

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Yes, I think that is exactly where we are headed. I hope and pray it doesn't

happen that way. The world would miss out on so much!

B CNY

Mom to Heidi 12 DS, Caleb 11 NDA,

Corrie 10 DS and Mae 6 DS

GOD BLESS AMERICA!

Do you ever wonder if society is going down the path that will punish

parents that choose to have children with disabilities rather than abort

them ... because of the costs that are involved in supporting those children

and adults?

I really don't believe services and funding is going to improve for people

with disabilities. If people like Singer influence college students

and others in our society, I think things will just get worse.

Cheryl in VA (one of the worst states for support services to people with

disabilities)

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We adopted from Texas and we got a subsidy and Medicaid (if we lived in

Texas, it was no good elsewhere). She had special needs and therefore

qualified. is our biological son and we made too much for SSI. Even

though we qualified for food stamps and free lunches when my husband was an E-4,

we made too much for SSI. Interesting, isn't it??

Elaine

Re: Services for kids

In a message dated 1/6/2003 3:07:09 PM US Mountain Standard Time,

shippahoy@... writes:

> kids but know

> that if the kids are adopted and raised by adoptive parents that they

> will get the services like medical care and money for adapted things

> they may need and diapers and wipies for kids over potty training age.I

> don't know why they don't help by- birth parents but by-adoption parents

> they bend over backwards for.

Not true here.

We are the adoptive parents of 5 children, 3 of them special needs and we

aren't getting anything more than the rest of the sp needs parents.

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... from this single mom and her kids....

WE LOVE YOU!

Judi - Proud mother to Jordan 7, ds and Savannah 9 weeks, nda

Where ever you go....

There you are

Services for kids

I see them working so

hard to try to provide the best for their kids when just a little help

from a program,any program would help these families.

Especially the single moms out there.They are the unsung heroes of America.

Thanks for letting me vent. wife of mom to

,Kristi, and

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Not meaning to sound lost here but who is Singer?

Judi - Proud mother to Jordan 7, ds and Savannah 9 weeks, nda

Where ever you go....

There you are

Re: Services for kids

Do you ever wonder if society is going down the path that will punish parents

that choose to have children with disabilities rather than abort them ...

because of the costs that are involved in supporting those children and adults?

I really don't believe services and funding is going to improve for people

with disabilities. If people like Singer influence college students and

others in our society, I think things will just get worse.

Cheryl in VA (one of the worst states for support services to people with

disabilities)

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> ... from this single mom and her kids....

> WE LOVE YOU!

> Judi - Proud mother to Jordan 7, ds and Savannah 9 weeks, nda

> Especially the single moms out there.They are the unsung heroes of

America.

Ditto from this single mom and her kids!!!

Sue mom to Kate 13 and Karrie 6 w/ds

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i would not be surprised if it does happen.

already i've heard how wrong i am to have had ny & bla bla bla. This society

is just so sad.

i would not change a thing about my having had ny. He is great & he has

helped make me into who i am. without him i would still be ignorant to all of

this & i would be just a regular parent. i am so blessed johnny has entered my

life. Why can't people see that??

Re: Services for kids

Do you ever wonder if society is going down the path that will punish parents

that choose to have children with disabilities rather than abort them ...

because of the costs that are involved in supporting those children and adults?

I really don't believe services and funding is going to improve for people

with disabilities. If people like Singer influence college students and

others in our society, I think things will just get worse.

Cheryl in VA (one of the worst states for support services to people with

disabilities)

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I can say I feel this way at times also that society would just rather have

us abort or hide away our kids from the world! But I refuse I say she has

every right to be here just as you and I , maybe more so since she seems to

be using her time wisely at reaching others and showing them what she has

shown me, A unconditional love that is simple in needs..... So I say who

should be here??? I think its these kids first! Nettie619 mom to 4 kids ,,

and 9 with ds and legally blind Or is it the world who is truly blind??

LOL---- Jeanette

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In a message dated 1/7/03 2:34:41 AM Central Standard Time,

writes:

>

> ,

>

> You are right. I am all for subsidies if the children have special needs,

> but those of us who are raising our biological special needs children

> basically get very little assistance. Our only assistance is 's

> special education services. Everything else is done through private

> insurance and copays. The only thing that I would really like to have and

> that my insurances won't pay for is for someone to come into the home and

> work with us - also consult with the school and daycare. If had

> medicaid, I could get that without jumping through hoops. There is a

> possibility that I could get this now through his IEP, but then it would go

> through our local family assessment family team, which my supervisor serves

> on.

>

> As far as developmental disabilities, I have two kids on my caseload whose

> needs are greater than s. Most of the other children have been

> affected socially and emotionally - not to mention being taken away from

> their biological families. If ever had to go into care (and if

> anything happened to Tim and I - this could happen b/c we don't have anyone

> who would take him), his adoptive parents would get everything through

> subsidy - including a darm stroller that I often dream of having.

>

> I wish those who are most vulnerable would be served appropriately. We

> live in a state that is near the bottom as far as services to the MR

> population goes. We pay thousands of dollars a year in taxes - yet I doubt

> $1 goes towards the MR/DD population :(

>

>

>

I think the whole system is very unbalanced. I'm one of the fortunate

adoptive parents that gets lots of services. I also have the experience

necessary to find the funding and programs and the connections who will tell

me when I'm being denied things unfairly. Unfortunately, even with all this,

it doesn't always seem like enough to meet this child's needs.

I know of a few other families with adopted children with special needs that

aren't getting near the assistance that they need or should be getting

through the subsidy system. Every state is a bit different and it seems some

really don't provide much.

Wisconsin actually is very good at providing at least medical assistance to

families with children with special needs. Family support dollars are always

in short supply.

On the whole flip side of the coin I'm amazed at all the things our son's bio

family got to assist them with this child while I had to work very hard to

get anything for him from that county before the adoption.

I hate the lack of privacy in the whole system. I worked in residential care

for years so know the county caseworkers and the whole circle at the county.

I'm sure we are the subject of some good gossip over coffee for some of my

old acquiantances. They can say anything they want-just give me what I need

to help this child.

Karyn

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