YOU KNOW YOU'RE HAVING A BAD DAY WHEN

[Guest guest]

YOU KNOW YOU'RE HAVING A BAD DAY WHEN..

You put your bra on backwards and it fits better.

You call suicide prevention and they put you on hold.

You get to work and find a 60 MINUTES news team waiting in your office.

Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.

You turn on the evening news and they are showing emergency routes out of

the city.

Your twin forgets your birthday.

Your 4-year-old tells you that it's ALMOST impossible to flush a grapefruit

down the toilet.

You realize that you just sprayed spot remover under your arms instead of

deodorant.

You discover that your 12-year-old's idea of humor is putting crazy glue in

your preparation H.

You have to sit down to brush your teeth in the morning.

Your cat abandons the nice box you prepared for her and has her kittens in

your dresser drawer.

It costs more to fill up your car than it did to buy it.

You wake up to the soothing sounds of running water...and remember that you

just bought a waterbed.

You spend $75 at the hair dressers and when you get home your dog starts

barking at you.

Everyone avoids you the morning after the company office party.

The bird singing outside your window is a vulture.

You wake up and your braces are stuck together.

You call your answering service and they tell you it's none of your

business.

Your income tax refund check bounces.

You put both contact lenses in the same eye.

Your husband says " Good Morning, " and your name is Sharon.

You call your wife and tell her that you would like to eat out tonight and

when you get home there is a sandwich on the front porch.

Your aunt Maude who has two poodles and a Chihuahua tells you that her

doctor just recommended plenty of rest in a warm, dry climate...and you live

in Arizona.

Airline food starts to taste good.

Your mother approves of the person your dating.

Your doctor tells you that you are allergic to chocolate chip cookies.

You have to borrow from your Visa to pay off you MasterCard.

You realize that you have memorized the back of your cereal box.

Nothing you own is actually paid for.

Everyone loves your driver's license picture.

Your kids start treating you the same way you treated your parents.

You compliment the boss' wife on her unusual perfume and she isn't wearing

any.

The health inspector condemns your office coffee maker.

The restaurant check has been on the table for ten minutes...and no one has

touched it.

You look out the window of the airplane and the BF Goodrich blimp is gaining

on you.

You invite the peeping tom in...and he says no.

The gypsy fortune teller offers to refund your money.

People think you are 40...and you are.

You notice dandruff...on your umbrella.

The worst player on the gold course wants to play you for money.

You are pigging out at Mc's by yourself and the manager orders the

numbers on the sign outside changed.

Ever happen to you? (grin)...still...

Have a WONDERFULL day,

May God continue to provide each of us with a measure of

STRENGTH, WISDOM and PEACE.

elaine

MamaE