Re: Me and my ICD (or for the English teachers: My ICD and I).

[Guest guest]

Tersea,

I am one who has responded to numerous postings, but of recent all I've seen

are the ones asking to be removed from the . I have also noticed that

I seem to receive a lot of responses to postings, but never seem to see the

actual posing first. Not sure if it's just me or if something is wrong with

the site. Just something to ponder. As for my IDC (owner since 16 May

2000), I don't have a name for mine either. I guess I never really thought

about it. My thoughts! Take care, stay healthy, and always feel free to

email me if you feel like nobody is listening.

Mike

Central Pennsylvania

Age 41

email:stcapital7@...

[Guest guest]

Dear ,

I was very sorry to hear that you are feeling invisible! I hope that I have

not contributed to your discomfort in any way. Of course every individual is

unique, special and wonderful in their own way! It is true that we all need

individual, personal encouragement from time to time, and I hope you will

start to get your fair share of that. You are indeed young, and brave, and I

admire you!

I am 38, and would still liked to be refered to as a " brave young woman "

myself! ;o) I have had my AICD for a little over nine weeks and have not

yet experienced a " zap " . I'm sure I will be looking to your for the wisdom

of your experience when that day finally arrives.

Keep your chin up, compare yourself to no others, and bless your sweet heart!

Laurie

[Guest guest]

Dear people that responded to my posting,

Thank you so very much. Laurie, you are indeed a brave young woman from

what I have heard from you and a real sweetheart. I would love to correspond

with you, Mike, Sue and anyone else who is interested. Please don't hesitate

to come to me with any questions or concerns because even though I'm only 20

I've been there and done that. My cardiologist said I've been though the

worst possible experiences you can have with an ICD, but five surgeries, four

ICDs, multiple caths and EP tests, and about 150 shocks later I'm still

standing. Don't get me wrong, I have severe post traumatic stress disorder

and the medicine and stress has combined to make me manic-depressive (or so

that's the theory) so I get knocked down a lot, sometimes even several times

in one day. But the important thing is that I get back up (eventually) even

though a lot of times it's the last thing I want to do. So I'm hardly the

invincible young lady with the ICD. When people ask me how I do it I tell

them " I do it because I have to. " There's no other way except to cop out of

life and I know that all of you do it because you have to also. Sometimes

life doesn't leave you with many options.

I believe the definition of courage is to do something even though you are

afraid to do it. So if anyone has ever gone to work even though they were

afraid of being shocked, they are courageous. If anyone has even gotten up

and gone to school or done work around the house even though they were afraid

of getting shocked, they are courageous. Have we covered everyone? So when

we talk about brave people of all ages I think we can include all the bionic

buddies on this list.

Well, my medicine (there's a useful word I know in Nihongo (Japanese).

It's pronounced koosooree, and roll the r), is making me tired so I'm going

to go to bed.

Sheetsureishimasu (good-bye for now),

[Guest guest]

,

I am writing to you and I hear you and I am listening to you. I have even

written you back.

I think you young ones are the salvation for us older ones as you give us

strength to keep coping.

You gave me an idea about a name I jsut named mine Williewacker, well that is

my lame attempt at humor

Love and Prayers

Sharon

[Guest guest]

Mike, Your computer sound like my computer I thought it was just me and I

didn't kow what I was doing wrong. welcome to the world of zappers. It is a

real shocking experience. I thik it is time for my medication. Did I tell

you I see a shrink? Bet you wouldn't have guessed that.

Take care, Stay grounded

Sharon

[Guest guest]

Dear Laurie,

Welcome to the world of Zappers. Have you met Sue yet? She has been

wonderful to me and and has supported me through some very rought times. I

think all you young zappers are incredible and you all give me strength and

encouragement. I consider anyone under 45 just a mere girl and how luck you

are. I hope and pray that by the time you all have reached my age (I will be

55 in Nov) that there is a cure for your heart problems,

The icd have changed so much over the past years. My first was huge and had

parts everywhere. My new one is small but is in an unconfotable place in my

right side. Wait till you have to have a mamogram with one in.

Love and Prayers

Sharon

[Guest guest]

Dearest ,

You got class and style. How well spoken! Thanks for the pep talk. I hate

to admitt it but sometimes I am afraid og just being alone but I don't have

any alternative I am a little old for a babysitter. Sometimes I am afraid to

go to sleep. Sometimes I am afraid just to go out side and take a walk in my

own neighborhood. I am not allowed to drive and sometimes I feel like a

prisioner.

Up until I had my new icd in I worked a 4o hour week in a very hectic office

and I just kept going. The I got very sick and ended up in the hospital with

pneumonia and that seemed to just drain me. I was on Predisone until my

sugar went sky high and then they tried to take me off but my lungs kept

filling upo and my regeration got worse.

I have not worked in over a year. At first it was fun to have my own time.

But then the bills kept coming in and weren't getting paid the doctors said

no more work. I applied for disabilty and it took over 6 months to get. Not

hat I get much.

My husband seems to think that I could go back to work at least part time as

of the coast of my meds and all but my doctors tell him that I need to reast

and get built back up and they doubt that I could ever work again do to all

the health problems I have develope. My husband also thinks that I should

drive and stop being a big baby. He doesn't see what can possible happen!

I know that he just understand how bad he makes me feel and How bad it malkes

me feel when he tells me how in debt we are and at his age we should have

more put back. Sometimes I don't want to be here period.

My shrink is crazier than I am and he tells me to ignore other and take care

of me. He thinks I am brave and have been through alot. He is trying to

figure out if my severe abuse as a child could have anything to do with how

bad my healt is!

Who knows maybe we will write abook and make millions and I can help all of

us to have better lives.

[Guest guest]

Sharon:

> I just named mine (AICD) Williewacker . . .

Sharon:

I don't think you'll find many of us guys using that name for ours.

Bill