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spending christmas alone - trying to find hope

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Hi all.

Sorry for the long post.

Well I just told my family that I can not join them for Christmas. The first

time ever. What is worse is that I did not have the nerve to tell them why. I

think it would either freak them out or they would minimize it. I can not

handle either scenario. The last thing I want to do is infect them. I am so

very alone.

I am paralyzed with exhaustion, both mentally and physically, and find my self

wondering why me hour after hour. I know so many on here are dealing with this,

but I never do get over the feeling of being alone with this nightmare. And

winter involves so many clothes!!!

All through the day, I come up with hundreds of questions and I find these

forums are the only outlet for communication. The fact that doctors and

exterminators are so inept is so disheartening. This is the 21st Century. I

never thought i would experience something that all the " professionals " would be

ignorant of. The exterminators tell me to go to doctors and the doctors tell me

to go to exterminators.

What is even more mentally exhausting is that I want to make a complete change,

but I feel I have to 1. move from my apt 2. get them off my body 3. quit my job

( I am so scared that they may be there as well, and I would just transfer them

to my new place). Doing all these three things needs to be timed and so

financially dangerous.

I am going to end with some probably silly questions, but I was hoping others

had heard about these obvious questions.

1. How do they respond in sea water? I was thinking of taking a trip to Florida

and practically stay in the ocean all day. I know they like humidity, but do

they stay on you in the ocean? In other words, do they like the beach?

2. Can you kill these things by going to Saunas and hot tubs?

3. I can't get these things off my face. I wear bathing cap at night with

medicated menthol powder inside, goggles, and ear plugs. I wash with Denorex and

Selsun Blue as well. I thought it was helping, but it seems a new batch just

started again.

4. I just started the Shani protocol. I have finished spraying Nylar and will be

putting down pyrethrin/Diat Earth as well. Question is: do you continue

vacuuming afterwards? Are you supposed to vacuum and put down Pyr/D Earth each

day? Anyone know.

Thank you anyone who reads this long post and offers their answers/insight. I,

like so many on here, am going through a hard time with this and feeling so

alone.

Thanks again.!

jdavid

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