[Mindful i Mouse] I Feel Terrific!

[Guest guest]

It is definitely different to write about eating than it is to just plug in the foods and stare at the numbers. I worked on my daily menu yesterday and realized that I was doing it again, trying to tweak the menu to bring better numbers into view. I got a good idea of what to eat, so I needed to leave it alone. I know I am attached to the numbers and that I find a weird sense of safety and validation there, but it is a false sense of security. The only three numbers I want to care about is my blood glucose, my ketones and the number on the scale is going down. Those numbers can tell me whether I am eating the right foods in the right amounts, even if I am just not that good yet at eating intuitively. Ketosis does bring about a reduced appetite so that I often think that this is how normal people feel about eating, but that's just another area to be deluded about. I just don't know if I will ever be able to be normal about eating, after 55 years, it surely is too ingrained in my psyche. But I can make habit changes, I can reason and I can be mindful. I am about halfway through the Zen of Eating and for some reason the middle chapters are hard for me to grasp. She is using the Buddha's teachings directly in the teaching to change our mindfulness about eating and while I grasp the overall attachment to suffering and how to be present, I find myself having to re-read a few times to get her meaning. She does say that it is a lifetime practice, so I will finish the book and go back to it when I feel more in tune with the concepts. My BG was a staggering 63 this morning! Last night I tested for ketones and had a 40/moderate reading, so I was happy about that. I am in ketosis and my BG's are normal. My estimated carbs are in the lower 20's, coming from flaxseed, fresh veggies, cheese and eggs and raw nuts. My calorie count is higher than the last time I was on the truck because of the added olive oil and nuts, but I am thinking this is good for my hair and skin and will not affect weight loss. At least i hope so. I will weight on Saturday. So far, absolutely no cravings or hunger beyond knowing when it is mealtime. Today's Meals are the same as yesterday: B- Golden flaxseed mixed with peanut butter and coffee, cup of coffee with dry whole milk powder L- cubed summer sausage, hard boiled egg, grape tomatoes, cucumber drizzled with olive oil and lemon juice, apple core, diet pepsi T- small handful of raw pecans, tea D- 2 chicken sausages with sundried tomatoes and provolone, tea --

Posted By i Mouse to Mindful i Mouse at 1/04/2011 05:37:00 AM