's motd Sunday November 21, 2010

[Guest guest]

GRUDGE RHYMES

WITH...FUDGE!

Sunday, 21 November 2010

We'll talk about the fudge part

later. But first, let's cover the "G" word. Grudge!

Oh, you can't imagine how many E-mails I receive from

individuals who're no longer speaking to certain

people in their lives. I'm talking about from friends

to even family members. They've stopped talking to

them because of some incident that happened between

them recently or even years ago. (I can't

believe how long some people hold grudges.)

"I haven't talked to my mother

in 16 years! I never got along with her when I was

a kid and I still don't get along with her today.

So, we just don't even talk to each other."

"I haven't seen or spoken to my brother for three

years now. And I may as well be frank about it. I

don't care if I ever speak to him again!"

" and I were best friends since high

school. I'm telling you, we were like glue. You

never saw one of us without the other. But then,

one day, we had a big falling-out and haven't spoken

to each other since."

So, do any of those statements sound at all familiar

to you? It's such a shame to hold a grudge. For one

thing a grudge leads to...fudge. No, wait.

Let me explain. See, when you have all of that anger

stored inside you because of a broken relationship,

you often try to soothe your anger with food. (Like

fudge, or any other fattening food for that matter.)

You keep replaying in your mind how close you once

were to the person you're no longer speaking to. And

you may as well admit it. There's a little sadness

inside you because, in your heart-of-hearts, you

really miss that person. And you keep thinking about

the thing that led to the hard feelings existing

between the two of you now.

So, what was that big

disagreement about, anyway? Do you even remember?

You know, when you hold on to a grudge, it's like you

have unfinished business in your life. There're all

of these big question marks in your mind about the

friend or family member you left behind. And...you

really need to answer those questions.

Deep inside your soul, you miss that person being a

part of your life. And I say maybe it's time...time

to make a phone call or pay them a visit. And hey, I

know it's hard to pick up that phone or get into your

car to go see them. But tell me, which is harder?

Holding the grudge until your dying day or finding

peace with that person while you're both still here on earth?

Now look, maybe the other person

involved in this grudge with you isn't interested in

making up. I know, reaching out to make amends is a

touchy thing. Let's say you do pick up that phone,

call the person you've not been speaking to but you're

met with a frosty reception. Well,

regardless, the point is...you made the phone call. You

reached out. You broke the ice and now you've

gotta make sure every piece of that ice is melted.

You have to tell the person you've been feuding with

that you feel really bad about what happened in the

past. Ask if they feel the same as you. Now I've

gotta tell you, what you get back is often a flip of

the emotions coin. I mean, if the person you had the

disagreement with doesn't want to become friends

again, then at least you'll know that you were brave

enough, doing your part to make things better. And

believe me, this valiant effort on your part will

bring you some much-needed peace.

And who knows, even if that first phone called didn't

yield good results, after the person you reached

out to thinks about how strong you were, they may be

tempted to call you! They could

be ready to make things better. And wouldn't

that be grand?

But here's the real bottom line. You'll no longer be

reaching for fudge because you've been holding a

grudge!

Love,