[The Little Bowl] A Prescription for Life

[Guest guest]

YAY! I weighed myself this morning and I am back to 237!!!! I told my husband that I will no longer weigh myself on home-time. I will weigh the day before we arrive and a week after we get back on the truck. This fluid weight gain we both have is just too depressing to see. I am ever so thankful to be back at 237. *Sigh of relief* The issue though of what we eat on hometime is still another thing to deal with and I am not sure what I will do about that. It is always so easy to say I can maintain the same diet on the truck at home-time. I have to stay aware of the difference between good intentions and what I actually can manage and what I do and how much of it is pure justification to indulge. I am doing better on the lower calories here on the truck. We had chicken last night. It was so good and I was content with 6 oz of chicken and not hungry when I went to bed. My BG is still too high, I tested at 116 this morning, I would like to see it drop to under 100 and hopefully get back in the 70-80 range. I am sure I will soon be in ketosis and it will all balance out again. Funny, I crave feeling better and it is becoming more important than ever before. I think again has something to do with that. With that in mind, how many more home-times do I want to upset my own apple cart, feel bloated and find myself eating too much? And how am I going to manage my eating a whole year at my daughter’s house with all the junk food and snacks in her cupboards? How do I want to complete my weight loss goal? How much longer do I want to do this? I have been thinking about discipline. The dreaded word, the word that holds such a negative connotation. But it has taken old fashioned discipline to get this far. It isn’t my diet that does it for me. It is my mindset that makes this diet a success or failure. In the past, I’ve compared my diet to being on a prescription medication. In order to get healthier and keep my body functioning at a better level, I must take my prescription every day. I can’t decide to take it when I feel like it, or skip a week because I want to feel worse. Doesn’t make sense! So if my diet is my prescription to better health and wellbeing, why would I suspend my daily dose? It takes discipline to keep on my diet and work through the temptations, the emotions, the hunger. I really want to get to goal. It no longer seems like a forever ride, it could be attained in a year! A year! This time, next year I could conceivably be at my goal weight. But I will not be there if I continue to make excuses as to why I can consume more calories on home time. Every single home-time in the past year has been about the struggle to stay on my diet, to deal with weight gain, to get all worked up about the consequences. So if I were taking a prescription med for say, my heart, I would not play these games with myself. I would take the damn pill every day and be glad it keeps me alive one more day. Why do I not consider my diet to be that pill of life? This is my thought and concern today, as I head toward the next home time in 5 weeks. Will I finally make the decision to continue on my diet as prescribed and work towards my goal with discipline and commitment every single day? All I have to do to make the decision is to comprehend that the next year could so easily turn into 3 or 4 years if I need to have all these “indulgences†along the way. It’s a choice isn’t it? And if I gave up my diet, what would happen besides weight gain? I would be needing diabetic meds, possibly even insulin, and ironically having to have a prescription that I would require discipline to take every day. Wow, sort of boggles the mind on how it all works into the same thing from every angle. I have answered my own question, without a doubt. --

Posted By elisaannh to The Little Bowl at 11/19/2010 06:45:00 AM