's motd Sunday January 31, 2010

[Guest guest]

I FORGIVE...

Sunday, 31 January 2010

Growing up an overweight child led to my being ridiculed a lot by the other kids in school. And, I'm telling you, their kidding was relentless! I had all kind of "fat names" thrown at me. You know, like...pig, porky or rhino. And hey, those were the nice ones!

Then there were the adults who judged me by the pound. You could see in their faces what they were thinking to themselves when they saw me."Oh, isn't that pitiful. Just look at the size of that poor kid. I feel so sorry for him!"At night, when I went to bed, I would replay all of the insulting soundbites I'd heard all day. It's so hard to cry when you're lying down. You can just about drown in your own tears. By the time I got to high school, let me tell you, things didn't get any better. And besides, I had gotten bigger! Those high school kids could be worse than my grade school classmates. Yes, the name calling continued but by high school, the pranks had started, too.

The other students at my high school would do anything to make me uncomfortable. There was one guy in particular who bothered me the most. When I went to the bathroom, he'd follow me there. And once I got inside, he'd pop in right after me. While I was in the stall, he'd wet some paper towels, ball them up then hurl the wadded-up balls of paper towels into the stall I was in. It was humiliating. (I tried using the school bathroom as little as possible!)And you know what? For some brief moments, I actually began to believe some of the mean things the other kids were saying to me and about me. I'd get really depressed. One day, I was so down, I wanted some advice. So I went to visit and talk to the father at the church I attended. He told me that my classmates were obviously not very nice for calling me such horrible names and treating me the way they did. He told me that being overweight made me a "target." Everyone got out their bows and arrows, taking aim at me! The father told me that the only way to move on was to forgive them all. He also told me that I should pray for them. And if they started again, then I should pray silently to myself for them.

As it turns out, the father was right. After a while, I was able to forgive my classmates, even that boy who threw those wadded-up paper towels into my stall in the bathroom!As I continued life past my school years, I still to this day sometimes get called names. And I have to tell you, it still hurts...for a moment. But these days, I quickly get over it. See, I no longer allow the name-calling and put-downs made by others to control my mood. And neither should you.If you hold a grudge, your weight will not budge. Remember that.Love,