Re. Cognitive problems update - dopamine and CFS / Janice

[Guest guest]

Hi Janice,

I am not very smart about neurotransmitters either, I'm afraid, but

perhaps I can relate part of my experience that may help you sort out

or achieve what you're after.

I do have diagnoses for generalized anxiety disorder and panic

disorder. I do not have diagnoses for depression or CFIDS or CFS or

ME or FMS. (My last doctor said he wasn't sure if I had FM or the

rest of what's wrong with me was " only getting worse. " The rest of

what's wrong with me includes: degenerative disk disease, ruptured

L4-5, osteoporosis, bilateral peripheral neuropathy, hypothyroidism,

and probably a few other things I've forgotten right now.)

I had my first horrific panic attack in my mid-late 20s, whichever

year it was and on July 10th. (Funny how some of these things cling

to memory, no?) I was never housebound, but I did have particular

situations I needed to avoid, to try to tapdance around the extreme attacks.

At this time (late 70s), I was prescribed librium, which did not

" touch " me, and then oxazepam, which did. It helped. In fact, it

saved my sanity and possibly my life at the time. I was tried on

Xanax, but only took it once, because all it did was make me

intolerably sleepy, not helping the actual underlying anxiety at

all. I took oxazepam from the late 70s until around 2002.

Also during this time, I was prescribed amitriptyline, first for aid

in sleep (I was going through a messy divorce and the Dalmane for

sleep wasn't working -- the amitriptyline helped " kick into action "

the Dalmane). In the early 80s I began seeing a neurologist for all

my spine problems. He continued the prescription for amitriptyline,

but then for pain. (It was never prescribed for me as an actual

antidepressant, which it is.)

In the late 90s, with my life and health falling to ruins around me,

I stopped (on my own) taking the amitriptyline. I had odd dreams for

a week, and then they ended. No big deal, and I was rid of the awful

amitriptyline.

During 1999-2004, I lost everything including most family members,

all my work, a good number of my pets, several friends, many

significant tangible goods, and whatever small shreds of health I had

then remaining. With loss of income, I had no way to keep seeing the

doctor I was seeing (nor to pay for medicine once prescribed). I

think it was in August or September of 2002 that I took the last of

the prescription for oxazepam that I had. I had tapered down

somewhat, beforehand, seeing " the end of the road " coming into

sight. I had some extra anxiety, sweats, and so on for a week or

two, and then that was over. I still avoid some situations in life,

and also I'm not about to go bungee jumping (afraid of heights) or go

on a " talk tour " (public speaking phobia) either <smile>. I am still

generally a more " anxious " person, but I'm not as bad as I was for

all my previous years.

Earlier this year, after I'd gotten a bit of a handle on a lot of the

bad body pain I was having, I started taking SAMe. I started slow

and low. I did not " jump right in " as I'm basically a skeptical

person who trusts very little (and certainly not the pharmaceutical

companies). I started slowly and with a low dosage. This was July.

After I was taking SAMe for only a couple of weeks (at 200 mg twice

per day, just starting out), I awoke one Friday with a very distinct

" snap, zing " sensation going on in my head. My perception was

noticeably clearer and my mind was more ordered, less cluttered. In

the spring, I had started to have catastrophic-for-me problems with

cognition, and I truly despaired that my mental faculties were on

their way out, too ( " bye-bye body, bye-bye brain " ). This " snap,

zing " was, for me, another sign that I was perhaps finding another

" key " to workable (and non-pharma) solutions for me.

I kept up the SAMe, increasing the dosage slowly, into the fall of

this year. In September and then November, I lost two more of my

critters, which threw me into another downward spiral. At

Thanksgiving, with the loss of the second fuzzball, I finally

increased the SAMe to the therapeutic dosage for depression (1600 mg

per day in two doses of 800), plus I added one 50-mg capsule of 5-HTP

to my daily repertoire. About two weeks after this, I approached

another birthday, this one a " milestone. " I was going to be 60 and

all I could think was " oh my god, SIXTY...I'm done for! " I was terrified.

Well, my birthday happened, and I got a wonderful gift by

surprise. An incredible sense of spiritual uplifting, for lack of

better words, a kind of serenity and sanity I'd never had before. At

first, I thought it was just the birthday and some odd

coincidence. Then, a week or so after the birthday was over but the

feeling of serenity was still with me, I realized it was upping the

SAMe or taking the 5-HTP, or possibly both of them. Am I lucky or am

I lucky? I am finally able to think about tackling some of the messy

jobs I was left with, a few years ago when my life fell apart. And

it all happened coincidentally on a birthday I thought would be the

penultimate worst day of my life. Imagine that! To be sixty years

old, relatively serene and competent, and also be pharmaceutical free

(except for the thyroxine for the hypothyroidism).

Well, I don't know if any of this helps you sort things out, but I

hope so. If you have any questions or need clarification on

something, please feel free to post here or backchannel me.

Best wishes to you, Janice, and to all, in the coming new year, and

may we all be blessed with peace on earth.

in Champaign IL

kcapel@...

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Cognitive problems update - dopamine and CFS.

Posted by: " qqtip2001 " qqtip2001@... qqtip2001

Sat Dec 30, 2006 6:20 am (PST)

Many group members are highly educated/informed about

neurotransmitters - I am not. Because of that, I will share some

personal information that someone could interpret that may help the

group as well as myself.

[...]

Janice