Re: OT: need help with daughter

[Guest guest]

,

My heart goes out to you. I have an 11yr old son who has been in the same school

for 8yrs(2yrs pre-school and K) and still feels like a social outcast. He is

painfully shy, not a competitve bone in his body and somehow always ends up the

victim. He is mentally cluttered and has very little control over his life. He

too is known as a weirdo and it breaks my heart. Another boy in his class was

quite similiar and was labeled with aspergers. His mom told me she and his

doctor put him on a low-dose of straterra which cleared him up almost

immediately and the boy is doing well (so it appears). Naturally, this is not an

option for us. We are changing schools in Sept. in an effort to make a new start

but I am terrified he will end up in the same situation. We are covered for

therapy but I don't know if thats the right way to go.

I am curiously awaiting the advice from the group you are seeking. Maybe I can

tap into it too.

Anita

mmitchell_home <mmitchell_home@...> wrote:

I know this may be OT but my 9 year old , NT, daughter

has had some issues since she was 5 that I would like

to get cleared up. Here they are:

* nail biting to the quick including the skin around

the nail up to the first joint.

* the world's smelliest feet.

* skin on feet peel.

* her emotional state. Thsi is the biggest. Ever

since she was in kindergarden she has this low

self-esteem/I'm the victim " attitude. She says she has

no friends and no one wants to play with her. she

tries too hard to be the comedian/class clown (but not

during class). She has even asked friends if they

thought she was an idiot and weird. She got a yes

answer along with " no one likes her " . Why would

anyone set themselves up for that? Of course she gets

upset when she gets this answer. she tries too hard to

be friends with poeple who don't really like her. She

is very competitve in non-competive situations. In

sports she is meek when the competition should be in

overdrive. Her " friends " shun her at this point. she

does not really know how to be afreind. she does not

compromise very well when she has friends over to do

what they want.

Any help for a remedy on this would be much

appreicated. I sort of see a mini me here (emotionally) and don't

know what to do. I've grown out of this and was not as

bad. but i do not want her growing up like me.

thanks

---------------------------------

[Guest guest]

We are changing schools in Sept. in an effort to make a new start but I am

terrified he will end up in the same situation. We are covered for therapy but I

don't know if thats the right way to go.

I am curiously awaiting the advice from the group you are seeking. Maybe I can

tap into it too.

Anita

*****Why send them to school at all? I'm being very sincere here, we are home

learners and I have never considered sending my kids to school.

My advice is to learn about home education and meet some people in your area

who home school, join some , read Holt or Grace Llewellyn.

Take Care,

[Guest guest]

>

>

> *****Why send them to school at all? I'm being very sincere here, we are home

learners and I have never considered sending my kids to school.

>

> My advice is to learn about home education and meet some people in your area

who home school, join some , read Holt or Grace Llewellyn.

>

I second that! And Holt and Grace Llewellyn are AWESOME! Very

inspiring and informative...

Breezy

[Guest guest]

,

I have considered home schooling but my son Neville's father ( who is from a

relationship prior to my husband ) doesn't care for the idea and feels it would

isolate him even more. To be honest, I am not sure that is a committment I am

able to take on. Neville is a late bloomer and hungers for relationships. He

will be entering a Catholic school that is quite small and will enable us to

have close relationships with the staff and student body. I have let him down in

the past because of the crippling devastation of the autism blow we received in

2002. It took me over a year to fully accept it and become proactive. Both my

other boys suffered because of it only Neville was older and more in need. I

never (or rarely) say never so we'll see what the future holds, but for now this

what we all have decided is best. Thank you for your suggestion.

Anita

& <thesixofus@...> wrote:

We are changing schools in Sept. in an effort to make a new start but I am

terrified he will end up in the same situation. We are covered for therapy but I

don't know if thats the right way to go.

I am curiously awaiting the advice from the group you are seeking. Maybe I can

tap into it too.

Anita

*****Why send them to school at all? I'm being very sincere here, we are home

learners and I have never considered sending my kids to school.

My advice is to learn about home education and meet some people in your area

who home school, join some , read Holt or Grace Llewellyn.

Take Care,

[Guest guest]

Hi :

I don't know where you live but can your daughter wear sandals now with

leather inner soles not plastic to better absorb perspiration. Perhaps

her feet are too warm all the time if she is in running shoes, just a

thought.

Wrt to her emotional issues I highly recommend a course and book called

" Redirecting Children's Behavior " by Kvols. The book is

available in bookstores for $15.00. Here in San Diego the 12 hr course

is paid for with money from cigarette taxes I believe. However I paid

$300.00 for the course before I knew better, but feel it was worth ten

times more. Here is the RCB link, where you can fine a course near you.

http://www.incaf.com/index.php

It's a very positive loving approach to raising our children. The issue

of avoidance or disengagement is discussed in the book. Your child's

actions seem to say " I can't do anything right, so I won't do anything

at all. " " I'm no good " and " Leave me alone " . Sounds like the other

children pick up on this and treat her the way she would seem to want.

Some basic things you can do are not to feel sorry or pity her and

avoid doing things for her even when she says she can't. But to arrange

for success in small, manageable steps and find or create situations in

which she can feel valuable. Of course I can't go into any depth here

but hopefully you can see some of the basic strategies and the course

will give you real-life ways to do the above. I know I'm greatly

simplifying her issues but I assure you the course can get you through

them all.

Your issue is serious as it is affecting your daughter's self esteem so

deeply already and I'm glad you are wanting to help her before the

dangerous teenage years come and she is even more vulnerable to her

peers.

Regards,

Nansi

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

My heart was breaking reading this about your daughter! As a mom I know it must

tear your heart up seeing what your daughter is experiencing. ((((Hugs)))) to

you both!

The few symptoms you provided are great ones for a professional classical

homeopath to use to find a remedy for your daughter. This is not something that

should be handled by anyone other than a professional. Acute things such as a

bee sting, head cold, etc. we can kind of help eachother out on, but

chronic/emotional issues are best left to the pros.

Where do you live? We would be happy to help you find someone in your area if

possible.

All the best,

Kay

OT: need help with daughter

I know this may be OT but my 9 year old , NT, daughter

has had some issues since she was 5 that I would like

to get cleared up. Here they are:

* nail biting to the quick including the skin around

the nail up to the first joint.

* the world's smelliest feet.

* skin on feet peel.

* her emotional state. Thsi is the biggest. Ever

since she was in kindergarden she has this low

self-esteem/I'm the victim " attitude. She says she has

no friends and no one wants to play with her. she

tries too hard to be the comedian/class clown (but not

during class). She has even asked friends if they

thought she was an idiot and weird. She got a yes

answer along with " no one likes her " . Why would

anyone set themselves up for that? Of course she gets

upset when she gets this answer. she tries too hard to

be friends with poeple who don't really like her. She

is very competitve in non-competive situations. In

sports she is meek when the competition should be in

overdrive. Her " friends " shun her at this point. she

does not really know how to be afreind. she does not

compromise very well when she has friends over to do

what they want.

Any help for a remedy on this would be much

appreicated. I sort of see a mini me here (emotionally) and don't

know what to do. I've grown out of this and was not as

bad. but i do not want her growing up like me.

thanks

[Guest guest]

We also homeschool - my son was not doing well in a large classroom - we are

dealing with some auditory processing and hypersensitivity issues -- we are

still in the process of evaluating. Homeschooling has been working out

well. Any others dealing with auditory processing / hypersensitivities in

their children?

Re: OT: need help with daughter

>

> We are changing schools in Sept. in an effort to make a new start but I

am terrified he will end up in the same situation. We are covered for

therapy but I don't know if thats the right way to go.

> I am curiously awaiting the advice from the group you are seeking. Maybe

I can tap into it too.

> Anita

>

>

> *****Why send them to school at all? I'm being very sincere here, we are

home learners and I have never considered sending my kids to school.

>

> My advice is to learn about home education and meet some people in your

area who home school, join some , read Holt or Grace

Llewellyn.

>

> Take Care,

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

hi michelle,

i want to add something here, after several have

already replied to your post. personally, i'd be

extremely weary of becoming part of the 'system'. when

my dd had self-confidence issues similar to what you

describe, we decided to send her to martial arts

classes. not once a week, but 2-3 times right from the

start. the training put her into the frame of mind

where she simply didn't need to think of what she

perceived as her own shortcomings, it helped her a

tremendous deal. you might want to consider it.

martial arts classes are usually not expensive, and

most of the senseis we met over the years are

extremely dedicated to bringing the best out in the

children, with lots of individual attention.

smelly feet and peeling skin does sound like metal

poisoning, but you might still be at the stage where

you can help her detox with the appropriate diet as

well as epsom salt baths etc. or find a classical

homoeopath to help with these issues.

just my 2 knuts worth...

claudia

--- mmitchell_home <mmitchell_home@...> wrote:

> I know this may be OT but my 9 year old , NT,

> daughter

> has had some issues since she was 5 that I would

> like

> to get cleared up. Here they are:

> * nail biting to the quick including the skin around

> the nail up to the first joint.

> * the world's smelliest feet.

> * skin on feet peel.

> * her emotional state. Thsi is the biggest. Ever

> since she was in kindergarden she has this low

> self-esteem/I'm the victim " attitude. She says she

> has

> no friends and no one wants to play with her. she

> tries too hard to be the comedian/class clown (but

> not

> during class). She has even asked friends if they

> thought she was an idiot and weird. She got a yes

> answer along with " no one likes her " . Why would

> anyone set themselves up for that? Of course she

> gets

> upset when she gets this answer. she tries too hard

> to

> be friends with poeple who don't really like her.

> She

> is very competitve in non-competive situations. In

> sports she is meek when the competition should be in

> overdrive. Her " friends " shun her at this point. she

> does not really know how to be afreind. she does not

> compromise very well when she has friends over to do

> what they want.

>

> Any help for a remedy on this would be much

> appreicated. I sort of see a mini me here

> (emotionally) and don't

> know what to do. I've grown out of this and was not

> as

> bad. but i do not want her growing up like me.

>

> thanks

>

>

>

>

>

http://www.livejournal.com/users/lady_karelia

http://www.ladyinthecloak.com

" We shall no longer hang on to the tails of public opinion or to a non- existent

authority on matters utterly unknown and strange. We shall gradually become

experts ourselves in the mastery of the knowledge of the Future. " Wilhelm Reich

__________________________________

Discover

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[Guest guest]

great suggestion. I have just started detoxing her so hopefully we'll see some

improvements soon. i figured that I have one son who is heavy metal

poisoned/autistic

and we live in a older home so she is bound to have something going on as well.

thank you all who replied.

>

> > I know this may be OT but my 9 year old , NT,

> > daughter

> > has had some issues since she was 5 that I would

> > like

> > to get cleared up. Here they are:

> > * nail biting to the quick including the skin around

> > the nail up to the first joint.

> > * the world's smelliest feet.

> > * skin on feet peel.

> > * her emotional state. Thsi is the biggest. Ever

> > since she was in kindergarden she has this low

> > self-esteem/I'm the victim " attitude. She says she

> > has

> > no friends and no one wants to play with her. she

> > tries too hard to be the comedian/class clown (but

> > not

> > during class). She has even asked friends if they

> > thought she was an idiot and weird. She got a yes

> > answer along with " no one likes her " . Why would

> > anyone set themselves up for that? Of course she

> > gets

> > upset when she gets this answer. she tries too hard

> > to

> > be friends with poeple who don't really like her.

> > She

> > is very competitve in non-competive situations. In

> > sports she is meek when the competition should be in

> > overdrive. Her " friends " shun her at this point. she

> > does not really know how to be afreind. she does not

> > compromise very well when she has friends over to do

> > what they want.

> >

> > Any help for a remedy on this would be much

> > appreicated. I sort of see a mini me here

> > (emotionally) and don't

> > know what to do. I've grown out of this and was not

> > as

> > bad. but i do not want her growing up like me.

> >

> > thanks

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

>

>

> http://www.livejournal.com/users/lady_karelia

> http://www.ladyinthecloak.com

>

> " We shall no longer hang on to the tails of public opinion or to a non-

existent authority

on matters utterly unknown and strange. We shall gradually become experts

ourselves in

the mastery of the knowledge of the Future. " Wilhelm Reich

>

>

>

> __________________________________

> Discover

> Have fun online with music videos, cool games, IM and more. Check it out!

> http://discover./online.html