A Fractured American History of Turkey

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A Fractured American History of " Turkey "

Wednesday, November 24, 1999

[A tongue-in-cheek reprint from last thanksgiving for the 90% of our

readers who've subscribed only within the last year.]

The bird commonly known as the " turkey " and familiar as the centerpiece

of the Thanksgiving Day feast is a native of the New World. It acquired the

name of the Old World country as a result of two different mistakes. The

name turkey, or turkey cock, was originally applied to an African bird now

known as the guinea fowl, which was believed to have originated in Turkey.

When the Europeans came upon the American Turkey, they thought it was the

same bird as the African fowl, so they gave it the name Turkey. Turkeys

were introduced to Europeans by American Indians. Europeans also misnamed

the American aboriginals as Indians, named after inhabitants of the Indian

continent.

This was also the result of two distinct mistakes by the Europeans.

First the Europeans thought they had landed on the Pacific edge of the

Indian Continent, which of course, would have been Asia or African, if there

were no American Continent, but not India in any event.. Also, they later

misread the maps of the earliest Italian explorers of the New World

Continent. The maps were created by a mapmaker named Amerigo Vespucci, who

would sign his FIRST name to his maps of the new Continent, " Amerigo " Once

again the Europeans had erred when they mislabeled the American Continent,

" America " based on the whimsical signature.

Meanwhile in true American tradition, Turkish-American-Italian-Indians

are demanding economic redress for having to endure this historic

mislabeling of their peoples, lands and dinner birds. Ironically the only

monetary denomination they will accept are Indian Rupees. The Hindi " rupee "

is not the name of any African fowl, according to Vespuccilander Hindians of

the

Ottoman Empire.

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