Re: Re: Hi All! I'm new to the group.

[Guest guest]

Hi Richelle,

My daughter’s loud screaming peaked at about 7th grade, then held steady for

about 3-4 years despite our collective efforts at structuring her environments,

routines, visual supports, communication strategies, etc...and Risperdal did

help a lot. Happy to say that after living through those rough years (and

school lived through them with her) what made the biggest difference was getting

her out into community work sites, away from the large high school environment.

In retrospect, why did we ever not see that being with 4,000 other teenagers in

a building was something she would like? She much preferred being around

working adults, who were way more predictable than teens, and once we made that

leap into the work world and community recreation, her behaviors lessoned

immediately. Teachers said ‘we can’t believe she’s the same student’

and it was true. Lessons learned!

So keep the faith. Your son’s behaviors may increase with onset of puberty,

but then didn’t we all suffer through raging hormones as teens? If you can

get through the next few years, it’s quite likely you’ll all emerge on the

other side with sanity and skin intact. Do what you need to in the meantime to

help him live as high a quality of life as possible...and if that means drug

cocktails, so be it. That’s my opinion anyway. There were lots of times when

I thought we wouldn’t make it, when we were pushed to the edge of crisis.

It’s at those times when it helps to have a good neurologist or psychiatrist

on your speed dial. And a few friends you can be honest with.

Glad you found us,

Laurie

P.S. We’re also big proponents here of NAPS and CHOCOLATE. Just fyi...

From: Richelle Post

Sent: Saturday, July 09, 2011 7:29 AM

IPADDUnite

Subject: Re: Hi All! I'm new to the group.

Hi.. I am also new to this group and have an 11 year old with Autism.

He too is really sweet at times, but, also has aggression issues. I'm just

wondering what other's

have seen with aggression. We have a behaviorist and a neurologist who has him

on a low dose of Risperdal.

Just wondering how this plays out with puberty... Uggh

[Guest guest]

Richelle,

 

I have a 19 year old son with autism.  His behavior, and many of his friends,

actually improved when he went through puberty.  He take prozac for anxiety. 

I think what helped alot was the social outlets that were available as he

entered high school, such as Special Olympics and Best Buddies.  We live in

Naperville and have typical peer partners at the high school level.  This is

very helpful too. 

From: Jerue Family <jeruefamily@...>

Subject: Re: Re: Hi All! I'm new to the group.

IPADDUnite

Date: Saturday, July 9, 2011, 2:28 PM

 

Hi Richelle,

My daughter’s loud screaming peaked at about 7th grade, then held steady for

about 3-4 years despite our collective efforts at structuring her environments,

routines, visual supports, communication strategies, etc...and Risperdal did

help a lot. Happy to say that after living through those rough years (and school

lived through them with her) what made the biggest difference was getting her

out into community work sites, away from the large high school environment. In

retrospect, why did we ever not see that being with 4,000 other teenagers in a

building was something she would like? She much preferred being around working

adults, who were way more predictable than teens, and once we made that leap

into the work world and community recreation, her behaviors lessoned

immediately. Teachers said ‘we can’t believe she’s the same student’ and

it was true. Lessons learned!

So keep the faith. Your son’s behaviors may increase with onset of puberty,

but then didn’t we all suffer through raging hormones as teens? If you can get

through the next few years, it’s quite likely you’ll all emerge on the other

side with sanity and skin intact. Do what you need to in the meantime to help

him live as high a quality of life as possible...and if that means drug

cocktails, so be it. That’s my opinion anyway. There were lots of times when I

thought we wouldn’t make it, when we were pushed to the edge of crisis. It’s

at those times when it helps to have a good neurologist or psychiatrist on your

speed dial. And a few friends you can be honest with.

Glad you found us,

Laurie

P.S. We’re also big proponents here of NAPS and CHOCOLATE. Just fyi...

From: Richelle Post

Sent: Saturday, July 09, 2011 7:29 AM

IPADDUnite

Subject: Re: Hi All! I'm new to the group.

Hi.. I am also new to this group and have an 11 year old with Autism.

He too is really sweet at times, but, also has aggression issues. I'm just

wondering what other's

have seen with aggression. We have a behaviorist and a neurologist who has him

on a low dose of Risperdal.

Just wondering how this plays out with puberty... Uggh

[Guest guest]

My daughter seems to be helped by magnesium. Can take the edge off.

There is a powder that is sometimes used with her, Gilhams Calm.

It's mixed in hot water and fizzes a lot. Used regularly it also keeps

her bowels moving and if real constipated (think that's a problem with a

lot?), a little extra can be used, but make sure a toilet is around

within the next 8 hours!

Ellen K

On 7/11/2011 6:57 AM, Richelle Post wrote:

>

> Thank you all so much for your experiences with aggression.

> It is not easy staring into this black hole.

> I remind myself to take things on a day to day basis.

> I am also looking into several supplements.

> I read that magnesium deficiencies are common and can help with

> hypersensitive hearing which can

> accompany puberty.

> It's a small thing that can't hurt and may help.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Glad to hear your son (and your family) have gotten a little break from the

meltdowns. Your rollercoaster analogy is a common one, and oh so true. What

this group (IPADD) can do for you is reassure you that, often – but not always

– as our kids move through puberty, behaviors & emotions may get worse for

awhile, but then tend to even out as they get older. Just like what all of us

experienced as teenagers! Ok, not exactly the same, but you get my point.

So brace yourself and your son as best you can for school starting again, I

remember those days clearly.

One other hopeful thought: there is NO SCHOOL CALENDAR in adult life. Yippee!

The typical 5-day workweeks become THE NORM instead of the exception. AND..no

more ‘August’, no more 2 weeks off for Winter Break, etc etc. Isn’t that

something to look forward to? It’s made a world of difference for my

daughter.

Take care,

Laurie

From: Richelle Post

Sent: Saturday, August 06, 2011 9:28 AM

IPADDUnite

Subject: Re: Hi All! I'm new to the group.

I just wanted to give a little update.

My 11 year old son with high functioning autism has not had

a physical meltdown since July 4th. Whewww.

We have been giving a magnesium supplement as well as continuing with his meds.

We also have a behaviorist.

School starts on the 24th of August.

I sense anxiety already, but am working on talking about it with him and social

stories.

Man.. I hate autism.. It is so draining.. Then emotional roller coaster of this

disorder is one ride

I'd like to get off of.

I am really appreciative of this board though, and, all of the questions and

great ideas.

Sometimes I can't believe I live the life I do. Other times my heart is so full

I think it will burst.

A lot of extremes..

[Guest guest]

Boy! do I know what you mean about waiting for the other shoe to

drop....it does make it harder to enjoy the good times. Maybe that's

another reason to try to learn to live in the moment, I've always been

so much into planning and looking ahead. It so helps to hear others with

similar stories! It's hard for others to quite understand.

On 8/8/2011 8:27 AM, Richelle Post wrote:

>

> Well said Ellen..

> I wish I could learn to not always expect the other shoe to drop at

> some point though.

> It makes it harder to enjoy the good times.

> It is getting a little better though.

>

>

[Guest guest]

I'm sorry you went through that. I have three children with intellectual

disabilities. Rick is 20 and has Down syndrome, andra is 17 and has Autism

and I adopted who is now 16 and has Down syndrome, Autism, Hearing

Impaired and has some other medical issues. I gave up even trying to visit

family. 2 years ago I attempted to take all three to a Christmas Eve party. It

was heart wrenching to me because no one was willing to lend a hand. I just

took the kids and went home. I have told my family if they want to see us, come

over! Every other year I will hold a family BBQ in the summer and that is when

I see the crew. It is completely exhausting! I have a large family on both

sides; but that is all I can do.

Bedard, PLA

Ricky, andra and 's Mom

Mothers on a Mission, Inc.

6515 Stanley Avenue #4

Berwyn, IL 60402

708-217-3196

www.mothersonamission.net

www.noewait.net

" Science may have found a cure for most evils; but it has found no remedy for

the worst of them all -- the apathy of human beings. " - Helen Keller

I don't regret my past, I just regret the time I've wasted with the wrong

people!

CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: This e-mail message, including any attachments, is for

the sole use of the intended recipients(s) and may contain confidential and

privileged information. Any unauthorized review, use, disclosure, or

distribution is prohibited. If you have received this e-mail and are not the

intended recipient, please contact the sender by reply e-mail and destroy all

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________________________________

From: Richelle Post <richellepost@...>

IPADDUnite

Sent: Tue, August 9, 2011 10:08:07 AM

Subject: Re: Hi All! I'm new to the group.

I remember once when Evan was about 4.

I brought him to visit my mom and sister along with our dog (to WI).

They were more concerned about getting lunch on the table, when I really could

have used a little help.

I said, " Maybe I should just go home " . And my mom said, " Maybe you should. "

It was a snarky comment. I know she didn't really mean it.

It was chaos, and I was having a hard time wrangling my two.

The thing that stuck the most with me was my sister looking at her and saying,

" This is her life " .

That was the saddest, quietest lunch I have ever eaten.

I cried most of the way home.

Most people will never understand. How could they.

[Guest guest]

We went through a year where we had 5 or 6 deaths in the family and close

friends. I had to call my Case Manager and get a respite worker to come to the

house so my husband and I could go. It was the worst year. I took all three of

them to their Great Grandma's wake. I felt it was extremely important that they

get to say good bye to her. It was very difficult; I swear that two of them knew

exactly what was happening. We talked with them before we went. I noticed that

my oldest; who was about 11 when this happened, was watching a family video and

he burst into tears when he saw his " Grammy " .

Bedard, PLA

Ricky, andra and 's Mom

Mothers on a Mission, Inc.

6515 Stanley Avenue #4

Berwyn, IL 60402

708-217-3196

www.mothersonamission.net

www.noewait.net

" Science may have found a cure for most evils; but it has found no remedy for

the worst of them all -- the apathy of human beings. " - Helen Keller

I don't regret my past, I just regret the time I've wasted with the wrong

people!

CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: This e-mail message, including any attachments, is for

the sole use of the intended recipients(s) and may contain confidential and

privileged information. Any unauthorized review, use, disclosure, or

distribution is prohibited. If you have received this e-mail and are not the

intended recipient, please contact the sender by reply e-mail and destroy all

copies of the original message.

________________________________

From: Liz <dljar58@...>

IPADDUnite

Sent: Wed, August 10, 2011 6:53:40 AM

Subject: Re: Hi All! I'm new to the group.

>

> , this is so sad. I don't get much help either.

I'm having the same thing happen. My stepdad's memorial service is in a couple

weeks. Most of my brother in laws will be there with my sisters. One of my

sisters is bringing all of her kids (4 of them), along with her hubby. My

youngest sister & I will be the only ones without our spouses. She has a son

with autism & my son , is too disruptive to take to a family gathering like

that. I've taken him to other family gatherings, but since we live so far from

everybody, it's a lot easier not to.

We live closer to my hubby's side of the family, & there used to be more family

gatherings when he was little; not so much anymore, because everybody has their

own families,etc.

Liz, mom to 29 yrs. Blind, adhd, ocd, depression, cmv