Re: PBS Special Message

[Guest guest]

I hate to say this and don't want to ruffle any feathers but are these parents

being given false hopes for their kids futures by the schools?? Just wondering

since honestly it took me a long time to accept what 's outcome might be

after high school.

H.

PBS Special Message

All,

Here's a link to Autism: Coming of Age, the PBS program about families' searches

or appropriate community supports for their adult children with autism:

ttp://www.wgby.org/autism/index.html. You can watch it online for free.

To Sherri and all, my suggestion would be to not only share with your

egislators (if they would actually watch it) but also, perhaps as importantly,

igure out strategies to get this in front of other PARENTS who do not subscribe

o places like IPADD and in front of community groups/leaders who are potential

artners to families in this situation. We all need to do our parts in widening

he net, and in capturing the imaginations of the next generation of

arents/young adults coming up behind us, as well as our local communities at

arge.

Why?

In my town, we have well-educated parents when it comes to advocating with the

chools. However, my impression is that MOST in our community are not seriously

lanning for 'vocation' of any kind, volunteer paid or somewhere in between.

e've recently had a situation locally where families/students were offered the

pportunity to work 10-15 hours a week in the (relatively) safe and supportive

nvironment of the public schools, in PAID jobs that some of us advocated for

reating, that are considered 'long-term' (I.e. will go beyond transition for as

ong as the person is doing the job well)...

AND FIVE FAMILIES TURNED THE JOBS DOWN.

There were many different reasons, all of them making complete sense to the

amilies involved.

What do we learn from this experience? Not to assume everyone is behind the

dea of working in the community, or of having their individual 'work' at all.

ut of misplaced kindness, concern, or the parent being overwhelmed (often

ightly so) at the concept of supporting, transporting, and troubleshooting paid

r volunteer community opportunities. We learned that sometimes, the idea of

he individual 'staying home' after transition seems like a safer choice to many

arents.

Think this couldn't happen in your neighborhood or in your school district?

hink again. I'll be it's more common that we know.

So next time we think about the need to educate our elected officials, let's

lso try spend some time educating one another and educating our community at

arge. We all need one another!

Laurie

[Guest guest]

,

I'm sure it's a combination of factors. Everyone is different. In some cases

it may be a failure of sorts on the part of the schools, in other cases parents

get good information but are unable to accept or process it. My husband being a

lawyer, one of his favorite expressions is 'ignorance is no defense' - and he

used to say it to me a lot, usually with a smile on his face, whenever I'd come

out with a statement like 'But no one told me!' about some transition-related

item that would have been helpful to our daughter. Thank goodness for the

internet!!!!

Laurie

Sent: Monday, April 04, 2011 1:44 PM

IPADDUnite

Subject: Re: PBS Special Message

I hate to say this and don't want to ruffle any feathers but are these parents

being given false hopes for their kids futures by the schools?? Just wondering

since honestly it took me a long time to accept what 's outcome might be

after high school.

H.

PBS Special Message

All,

Here's a link to Autism: Coming of Age, the PBS program about families' searches

or appropriate community supports for their adult children with autism:

ttp://www.wgby.org/autism/index.html. You can watch it online for free.

To Sherri and all, my suggestion would be to not only share with your

egislators (if they would actually watch it) but also, perhaps as importantly,

igure out strategies to get this in front of other PARENTS who do not subscribe

o places like IPADD and in front of community groups/leaders who are potential

artners to families in this situation. We all need to do our parts in widening

he net, and in capturing the imaginations of the next generation of

arents/young adults coming up behind us, as well as our local communities at

arge.

Why?

In my town, we have well-educated parents when it comes to advocating with the

chools. However, my impression is that MOST in our community are not seriously

lanning for 'vocation' of any kind, volunteer paid or somewhere in between.

e've recently had a situation locally where families/students were offered the

pportunity to work 10-15 hours a week in the (relatively) safe and supportive

nvironment of the public schools, in PAID jobs that some of us advocated for

reating, that are considered 'long-term' (I.e. will go beyond transition for as

ong as the person is doing the job well)...

AND FIVE FAMILIES TURNED THE JOBS DOWN.

There were many different reasons, all of them making complete sense to the

amilies involved.

What do we learn from this experience? Not to assume everyone is behind the

dea of working in the community, or of having their individual 'work' at all.

ut of misplaced kindness, concern, or the parent being overwhelmed (often

ightly so) at the concept of supporting, transporting, and troubleshooting paid

r volunteer community opportunities. We learned that sometimes, the idea of

he individual 'staying home' after transition seems like a safer choice to many

arents.

Think this couldn't happen in your neighborhood or in your school district?

hink again. I'll be it's more common that we know.

So next time we think about the need to educate our elected officials, let's

lso try spend some time educating one another and educating our community at

arge. We all need one another!

Laurie

[Guest guest]

Sometimes we just hear what we want to hear.....and sometimes it's the way

things are presented to us I guess.

Re: PBS Special Message

,

'm sure it's a combination of factors. Everyone is different. In some cases

t may be a failure of sorts on the part of the schools, in other cases parents

et good information but are unable to accept or process it. My husband being a

awyer, one of his favorite expressions is 'ignorance is no defense' - and he

sed to say it to me a lot, usually with a smile on his face, whenever I'd come

ut with a statement like 'But no one told me!' about some transition-related

tem that would have been helpful to our daughter. Thank goodness for the

nternet!!!!

aurie

ent: Monday, April 04, 2011 1:44 PM

o: IPADDUnite

ubject: Re: PBS Special Message

I hate to say this and don't want to ruffle any feathers but are these parents

eing given false hopes for their kids futures by the schools?? Just wondering

ince honestly it took me a long time to accept what 's outcome might be

fter high school.

ary H.

-----Original Message-----

rom: Jerue Family <jeruefamily@...>

o: IPADDUnite <IPADDUnite >

ent: Mon, Apr 4, 2011 12:22 pm

ubject: PBS Special Message

All,

ere's a link to Autism: Coming of Age, the PBS program about families' searches

or appropriate community supports for their adult children with autism:

tp://www.wgby.org/autism/index.html. You can watch it online for free.

o Sherri and all, my suggestion would be to not only share with your

gislators (if they would actually watch it) but also, perhaps as importantly,

gure out strategies to get this in front of other PARENTS who do not subscribe

places like IPADD and in front of community groups/leaders who are potential

rtners to families in this situation. We all need to do our parts in widening

e net, and in capturing the imaginations of the next generation of

rents/young adults coming up behind us, as well as our local communities at

rge.

hy?

n my town, we have well-educated parents when it comes to advocating with the

hools. However, my impression is that MOST in our community are not seriously

anning for 'vocation' of any kind, volunteer paid or somewhere in between.

've recently had a situation locally where families/students were offered the

portunity to work 10-15 hours a week in the (relatively) safe and supportive

vironment of the public schools, in PAID jobs that some of us advocated for

eating, that are considered 'long-term' (I.e. will go beyond transition for as

ng as the person is doing the job well)...

ND FIVE FAMILIES TURNED THE JOBS DOWN.

here were many different reasons, all of them making complete sense to the

milies involved.

hat do we learn from this experience? Not to assume everyone is behind the

ea of working in the community, or of having their individual 'work' at all.

t of misplaced kindness, concern, or the parent being overwhelmed (often

ghtly so) at the concept of supporting, transporting, and troubleshooting paid

volunteer community opportunities. We learned that sometimes, the idea of

e individual 'staying home' after transition seems like a safer choice to many

rents.

hink this couldn't happen in your neighborhood or in your school district?

ink again. I'll be it's more common that we know.

o next time we think about the need to educate our elected officials, let's

so try spend some time educating one another and educating our community at

rge. We all need one another!

aurie

Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

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[Guest guest]

I don't know about all of you, but I'm not the kind of person who is satisfied

with what the school tells me.  When it was time for my daughter to go to

college, I did all the leg work (with her of course).  When it comes time to

planning for the next stage of my son's life, I do the research myself.  The

school could never give me the amount of information I am absorbing from all my

sources.  Furthermore, when would they give me this information?  Too little

to late, I'm sure.  Most of the teachers are pretty clueless about this, and

the administrators simply don't do it because they are busy shuffling paper. 

 

This is hard stuff to learn and hard stuff to absorb.  The best way to learn

and absorb it is to learn from others who have had the experience

themselves. Probably the part of all of it that frustrates me the most is that

the bureacracy moves very, very slowly and it takes forever to get anything

accomplished. 

From: Jerue Family <jeruefamily@...>

Subject: Re: PBS Special Message

IPADDUnite

Date: Monday, April 4, 2011, 7:47 PM

 

,

I'm sure it's a combination of factors. Everyone is different. In some cases it

may be a failure of sorts on the part of the schools, in other cases parents get

good information but are unable to accept or process it. My husband being a

lawyer, one of his favorite expressions is 'ignorance is no defense' - and he

used to say it to me a lot, usually with a smile on his face, whenever I'd come

out with a statement like 'But no one told me!' about some transition-related

item that would have been helpful to our daughter. Thank goodness for the

internet!!!!

Laurie

Sent: Monday, April 04, 2011 1:44 PM

IPADDUnite

Subject: Re: PBS Special Message

I hate to say this and don't want to ruffle any feathers but are these parents

being given false hopes for their kids futures by the schools?? Just wondering

since honestly it took me a long time to accept what 's outcome might be

after high school.

H.

PBS Special Message

All,

Here's a link to Autism: Coming of Age, the PBS program about families' searches

or appropriate community supports for their adult children with autism:

ttp://www.wgby.org/autism/index.html. You can watch it online for free.

To Sherri and all, my suggestion would be to not only share with your

egislators (if they would actually watch it) but also, perhaps as importantly,

igure out strategies to get this in front of other PARENTS who do not subscribe

o places like IPADD and in front of community groups/leaders who are potential

artners to families in this situation. We all need to do our parts in widening

he net, and in capturing the imaginations of the next generation of

arents/young adults coming up behind us, as well as our local communities at

arge.

Why?

In my town, we have well-educated parents when it comes to advocating with the

chools. However, my impression is that MOST in our community are not seriously

lanning for 'vocation' of any kind, volunteer paid or somewhere in between.

e've recently had a situation locally where families/students were offered the

pportunity to work 10-15 hours a week in the (relatively) safe and supportive

nvironment of the public schools, in PAID jobs that some of us advocated for

reating, that are considered 'long-term' (I.e. will go beyond transition for as

ong as the person is doing the job well)...

AND FIVE FAMILIES TURNED THE JOBS DOWN.

There were many different reasons, all of them making complete sense to the

amilies involved.

What do we learn from this experience? Not to assume everyone is behind the

dea of working in the community, or of having their individual 'work' at all.

ut of misplaced kindness, concern, or the parent being overwhelmed (often

ightly so) at the concept of supporting, transporting, and troubleshooting paid

r volunteer community opportunities. We learned that sometimes, the idea of

he individual 'staying home' after transition seems like a safer choice to many

arents.

Think this couldn't happen in your neighborhood or in your school district?

hink again. I'll be it's more common that we know.

So next time we think about the need to educate our elected officials, let's

lso try spend some time educating one another and educating our community at

arge. We all need one another!

Laurie

[Guest guest]

For Laurie's example, it's possible that the 5 families turned down the 10-15

hour/wk position because they were concerned about their kids working in the

school in front of peers.

Some parents might have not liked this, and this kind of work is sometimes

criticized in parent circles. " They are making my kid a janitor in his own

school " --Never mind that the kid is getting paid and developing marketable

skills, and never mind that typical adults make a living this way!

In our district, for the co-op work program (paid in gift cards through STEP),

before a student was placed in an outside position, they had to put in a year of

working within their school building. (It was just for 1 class period a day.)

The district seemed to feel that they wanted to see how much supervision a

student needed before sending them out to a local business.

Responsibilities rotated through package delivery, lunchroom restocking,

recycling, and trash pick-up (mostly moving the wheeled cans to the back

dumpster, I think).

However, we saw it as the first move to a job. Neal surprised everyone when he

handed in to the supervisor an envelope of cash he found in one of the trash

cans. His honesty was praised by all who knew about it, and you couldn't buy

the kind of reference that earned him from the co-op coordinator.

-Gail

________________________________

From: Jerue Family <jeruefamily@...>

IPADDUnite

Sent: Mon, April 4, 2011 12:21:57 PM

Subject: PBS Special Message

All,

Here's a link to Autism: Coming of Age, the PBS program about families' searches

for appropriate community supports for their adult children with autism:

http://www.wgby.org/autism/index.html. You can watch it online for free.

To Sherri and all, my suggestion would be to not only share with your

legislators (if they would actually watch it) but also, perhaps as importantly,

figure out strategies to get this in front of other PARENTS who do not subscribe

to places like IPADD and in front of community groups/leaders who are potential

partners to families in this situation. We all need to do our parts in widening

the net, and in capturing the imaginations of the next generation of

parents/young adults coming up behind us, as well as our local communities at

large.

Why?

In my town, we have well-educated parents when it comes to advocating with the

schools. However, my impression is that MOST in our community are not seriously

planning for 'vocation' of any kind, volunteer paid or somewhere in between.

We've recently had a situation locally where families/students were offered the

opportunity to work 10-15 hours a week in the (relatively) safe and supportive

environment of the public schools, in PAID jobs that some of us advocated for

creating, that are considered 'long-term' (I.e. will go beyond transition for as

long as the person is doing the job well)...

AND FIVE FAMILIES TURNED THE JOBS DOWN.

There were many different reasons, all of them making complete sense to the

families involved.

What do we learn from this experience? Not to assume everyone is behind the

idea of working in the community, or of having their individual 'work' at all.

Out of misplaced kindness, concern, or the parent being overwhelmed (often

rightly so) at the concept of supporting, transporting, and troubleshooting paid

or volunteer community opportunities. We learned that sometimes, the idea of

the individual 'staying home' after transition seems like a safer choice to many

parents.

Think this couldn't happen in your neighborhood or in your school district?

Think again. I'll be it's more common that we know.

So next time we think about the need to educate our elected officials, let's

also try spend some time educating one another and educating our community at

large. We all need one another!

Laurie

[Guest guest]

well that's just silly for parents to think that way but what do I know.

had several jobs in school before he got his job in the community. He cleaned

the faculty cafeteria, worked in the mailroom, did shredding. I asked the

district special ed director why they wouldn't create jobs for our kids in the

district........didn't really get a great response, seems to me we'd want to

employ our own and be proud of them and their accomplishments.

H.

Re: PBS Special Message

For Laurie's example, it's possible that the 5 families turned down the 10-15

our/wk position because they were concerned about their kids working in the

chool in front of peers.

ome parents might have not liked this, and this kind of work is sometimes

riticized in parent circles. " They are making my kid a janitor in his own

chool " --Never mind that the kid is getting paid and developing marketable

kills, and never mind that typical adults make a living this way!

n our district, for the co-op work program (paid in gift cards through STEP),

efore a student was placed in an outside position, they had to put in a year of

working within their school building. (It was just for 1 class period a day.)

he district seemed to feel that they wanted to see how much supervision a

tudent needed before sending them out to a local business.

esponsibilities rotated through package delivery, lunchroom restocking,

ecycling, and trash pick-up (mostly moving the wheeled cans to the back

umpster, I think).

However, we saw it as the first move to a job. Neal surprised everyone when he

anded in to the supervisor an envelope of cash he found in one of the trash

ans. His honesty was praised by all who knew about it, and you couldn't buy

he kind of reference that earned him from the co-op coordinator.

-Gail

_______________________________

rom: Jerue Family <jeruefamily@...>

o: IPADDUnite

ent: Mon, April 4, 2011 12:21:57 PM

ubject: PBS Special Message

ll,

Here's a link to Autism: Coming of Age, the PBS program about families' searches

for appropriate community supports for their adult children with autism:

ttp://www.wgby.org/autism/index.html. You can watch it online for free.

o Sherri and all, my suggestion would be to not only share with your

egislators (if they would actually watch it) but also, perhaps as importantly,

igure out strategies to get this in front of other PARENTS who do not subscribe

to places like IPADD and in front of community groups/leaders who are potential

artners to families in this situation. We all need to do our parts in widening

the net, and in capturing the imaginations of the next generation of

arents/young adults coming up behind us, as well as our local communities at

arge.

hy?

In my town, we have well-educated parents when it comes to advocating with the

chools. However, my impression is that MOST in our community are not seriously

planning for 'vocation' of any kind, volunteer paid or somewhere in between.

e've recently had a situation locally where families/students were offered the

pportunity to work 10-15 hours a week in the (relatively) safe and supportive

nvironment of the public schools, in PAID jobs that some of us advocated for

reating, that are considered 'long-term' (I.e. will go beyond transition for as

long as the person is doing the job well)...

AND FIVE FAMILIES TURNED THE JOBS DOWN.

There were many different reasons, all of them making complete sense to the

amilies involved.

hat do we learn from this experience? Not to assume everyone is behind the

dea of working in the community, or of having their individual 'work' at all.

ut of misplaced kindness, concern, or the parent being overwhelmed (often

ightly so) at the concept of supporting, transporting, and troubleshooting paid

or volunteer community opportunities. We learned that sometimes, the idea of

he individual 'staying home' after transition seems like a safer choice to many

parents.

hink this couldn't happen in your neighborhood or in your school district?

hink again. I'll be it's more common that we know.

o next time we think about the need to educate our elected officials, let's

lso try spend some time educating one another and educating our community at

arge. We all need one another!

aurie

Non-text portions of this message have been removed]