Guest guest Posted October 31, 2001 Report Share Posted October 31, 2001 In a message dated 10/31/01 11:02:27 PM Central Standard Time, b4alltoday@... writes: > > told me " Kathy, you have nothing to worry about (I was worried about not > That is so beautiful, Kathy. And I'm sure it's true. I guess 10 is sort of a turning point, age wise, I remember being concerned about 's speech at that point, feeling he may have sort of topped out with it, but he improved a great deal after that. But I won't hit you with a wet noodle, Sara is doing great by any standard. And she has the personality to get away with anything. Jessie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 31, 2001 Report Share Posted October 31, 2001 In a message dated 10/31/01 11:02:27 PM Central Standard Time, b4alltoday@... writes: > > told me " Kathy, you have nothing to worry about (I was worried about not > That is so beautiful, Kathy. And I'm sure it's true. I guess 10 is sort of a turning point, age wise, I remember being concerned about 's speech at that point, feeling he may have sort of topped out with it, but he improved a great deal after that. But I won't hit you with a wet noodle, Sara is doing great by any standard. And she has the personality to get away with anything. Jessie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 In a message dated 11/1/01 12:02:27 AM Eastern Standard Time, b4alltoday@... writes: > oh have to share a dream I had recently. I dreamt Sara and I went to heaven > and > I could not find her, knowing she'll be made perfect I could not find her > Kathy - my dad always says that Jimmy is the perfect one.....it is the rest of us that need some work!! Nonetheless, I have to admit that, when all the news about cloning the Dolly the sheep came out, I did wonder what it would be like if we could take a non-DS cell from Jimmy (he has mosaic DS, so he has some 46 chromosome cells), clone it, and have another child genetically identical to Jimmy, but without the DS. Obviously a fantasy, but I did quite a bit of " wondering " in those days.... And don't worry about comparing Sara to other kids......I think at some point, we do that regarding ALL of our kids. I think that it's just more conscious with our kids with DS....since the differences are so great.....even between our own kid and other kids with DS. Our best friends have a daughter who speaks SO well, and is SO socially appropriate.....I frequently think " gee, I wish..... " after we get together with them. Yet, Jimmy has strengths that she doesn't have. LOL - we joke with our friends that if (when!?!?!?) Jimmy and Ellen get married, Ellen will do all the talking and Jimmy will balance the checkbook!!! (hmmmmm - kind of like MY marriage!) So, this too, will pass. Maybe you and Sara could do a " mom and daughter " outing together - take her to dinner and a movie, or to the zoo, or to the mall.......I'm sure you'll gain new appreciation for all of the wonderful things about Sara.......and not worry so much about that other stuff. Take care, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 In a message dated 11/1/01 12:02:27 AM Eastern Standard Time, b4alltoday@... writes: > oh have to share a dream I had recently. I dreamt Sara and I went to heaven > and > I could not find her, knowing she'll be made perfect I could not find her > Kathy - my dad always says that Jimmy is the perfect one.....it is the rest of us that need some work!! Nonetheless, I have to admit that, when all the news about cloning the Dolly the sheep came out, I did wonder what it would be like if we could take a non-DS cell from Jimmy (he has mosaic DS, so he has some 46 chromosome cells), clone it, and have another child genetically identical to Jimmy, but without the DS. Obviously a fantasy, but I did quite a bit of " wondering " in those days.... And don't worry about comparing Sara to other kids......I think at some point, we do that regarding ALL of our kids. I think that it's just more conscious with our kids with DS....since the differences are so great.....even between our own kid and other kids with DS. Our best friends have a daughter who speaks SO well, and is SO socially appropriate.....I frequently think " gee, I wish..... " after we get together with them. Yet, Jimmy has strengths that she doesn't have. LOL - we joke with our friends that if (when!?!?!?) Jimmy and Ellen get married, Ellen will do all the talking and Jimmy will balance the checkbook!!! (hmmmmm - kind of like MY marriage!) So, this too, will pass. Maybe you and Sara could do a " mom and daughter " outing together - take her to dinner and a movie, or to the zoo, or to the mall.......I'm sure you'll gain new appreciation for all of the wonderful things about Sara.......and not worry so much about that other stuff. Take care, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 In a message dated 11/1/01 4:42:03 AM Central Standard Time, blat@... writes: > Wow, Kathy, this does not sound like you! I'm really surprised that you > believe that DS means there is something wrong and that it needs to be > fixed! I fully believe that our kids were created with DS for a purpose > and that heaven is full of slanty-eyed cherubs. > Bev HI Bev I don't really think she needs to be fixed but maybe Im questioning/examing myself on if Im doing the right stuff, maybe I need to do more..........I accept Sara for who she is and really love it too, sass and all heehee but am I really preparing her for the future, is there more I should be doing etc.......stuff .....I hope Im not letting her down Kathy mom to Sara 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 In a message dated 11/1/01 4:42:03 AM Central Standard Time, blat@... writes: > Wow, Kathy, this does not sound like you! I'm really surprised that you > believe that DS means there is something wrong and that it needs to be > fixed! I fully believe that our kids were created with DS for a purpose > and that heaven is full of slanty-eyed cherubs. > Bev HI Bev I don't really think she needs to be fixed but maybe Im questioning/examing myself on if Im doing the right stuff, maybe I need to do more..........I accept Sara for who she is and really love it too, sass and all heehee but am I really preparing her for the future, is there more I should be doing etc.......stuff .....I hope Im not letting her down Kathy mom to Sara 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 Wow, Kathy, this does not sound like you! I'm really surprised that you believe that DS means there is something wrong and that it needs to be fixed! I fully believe that our kids were created with DS for a purpose and that heaven is full of slanty-eyed cherubs. Bev b4alltoday@... wrote: I dreamt Sara and I went to heaven and > I could not find her, knowing she'll be made perfect I could not find > her > sweet chubby face, upward slanted eyes that resemble a child with ds. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 Wow, Kathy, this does not sound like you! I'm really surprised that you believe that DS means there is something wrong and that it needs to be fixed! I fully believe that our kids were created with DS for a purpose and that heaven is full of slanty-eyed cherubs. Bev b4alltoday@... wrote: I dreamt Sara and I went to heaven and > I could not find her, knowing she'll be made perfect I could not find > her > sweet chubby face, upward slanted eyes that resemble a child with ds. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 In a message dated 11/1/01 10:34:51 AM Eastern Standard Time, sharonhughes@... writes: > They don't do inclusion here, it was done in the state we moved from. I > have made my wishes known, but I already feel they are going to want her in > self contained. Ummmmm, Sharon......the right to be included is FEDERAL law.....it's not something that a state has a choice about. If you think that it is most appropriate for to be included in a regular ed classroom, then GO FOR IT! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 In a message dated 11/1/01 10:34:51 AM Eastern Standard Time, sharonhughes@... writes: > They don't do inclusion here, it was done in the state we moved from. I > have made my wishes known, but I already feel they are going to want her in > self contained. Ummmmm, Sharon......the right to be included is FEDERAL law.....it's not something that a state has a choice about. If you think that it is most appropriate for to be included in a regular ed classroom, then GO FOR IT! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 <<I hope Im not letting her down Kathy mom to Sara 9>> Sara couldn't have a better mom. This goes for all on this list. (and those not ) We wouldn't be here if we were not trying to do the best for our kids. I have feelings of failing Ted since he is overweight. I do not over feed him and I try but no success. It is the hardest job I have ever had to parent Ted. He is very different and it is very different from parenting my other 2 sons. But I do the best that I can. I think you just had a moment of being very scared. I know I have those and maybe you don't but I am guilty of second guessing myself. I am doing this as a single parent so it is all the more scary at times. Gail Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 <<I hope Im not letting her down Kathy mom to Sara 9>> Sara couldn't have a better mom. This goes for all on this list. (and those not ) We wouldn't be here if we were not trying to do the best for our kids. I have feelings of failing Ted since he is overweight. I do not over feed him and I try but no success. It is the hardest job I have ever had to parent Ted. He is very different and it is very different from parenting my other 2 sons. But I do the best that I can. I think you just had a moment of being very scared. I know I have those and maybe you don't but I am guilty of second guessing myself. I am doing this as a single parent so it is all the more scary at times. Gail Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 Kathy I understand exactly what you are saying. turned 10 in September, and it was one of the hardest birthdays for me that I can remember. When she turned 1, I remember celebrating because she had been so healthy. I don't ever remember doing so much thinking, questioning of our decisions, or second guessing ever. I think 10 is a milestone - most decades are, I just had my 40th. And while is doing great, and she is beautiful, I still sometimes wonder about the what ifs. I think that is human nature. will soon complete her testing in our new state, and I will receive those results. Then an IEP meeting will be called. They don't do inclusion here, it was done in the state we moved from. I have made my wishes known, but I already feel they are going to want her in self contained. Maybe I am just worrying too much, but the whole situation also makes me want to question the decisions we have made. Anyway, I think you are great and Sara is wonderful, and I always look forward to reading your posts. Just know that what you are feeling and thinking is the same that many others have thought and felt. Take Care!!! -- Sharon, Mom to (10, DS) and (6) > I don't really think she needs to be fixed but maybe Im questioning/examing > myself on if Im doing the right stuff, maybe I need to do more..........I > accept Sara for who she is and really love it too, sass and all heehee but am > I really preparing her for the future, is there more I should be doing > etc.......stuff .....I hope Im not letting her down > > Kathy mom to Sara 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 Kathy I understand exactly what you are saying. turned 10 in September, and it was one of the hardest birthdays for me that I can remember. When she turned 1, I remember celebrating because she had been so healthy. I don't ever remember doing so much thinking, questioning of our decisions, or second guessing ever. I think 10 is a milestone - most decades are, I just had my 40th. And while is doing great, and she is beautiful, I still sometimes wonder about the what ifs. I think that is human nature. will soon complete her testing in our new state, and I will receive those results. Then an IEP meeting will be called. They don't do inclusion here, it was done in the state we moved from. I have made my wishes known, but I already feel they are going to want her in self contained. Maybe I am just worrying too much, but the whole situation also makes me want to question the decisions we have made. Anyway, I think you are great and Sara is wonderful, and I always look forward to reading your posts. Just know that what you are feeling and thinking is the same that many others have thought and felt. Take Care!!! -- Sharon, Mom to (10, DS) and (6) > I don't really think she needs to be fixed but maybe Im questioning/examing > myself on if Im doing the right stuff, maybe I need to do more..........I > accept Sara for who she is and really love it too, sass and all heehee but am > I really preparing her for the future, is there more I should be doing > etc.......stuff .....I hope Im not letting her down > > Kathy mom to Sara 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 In a message dated 11/1/2001 8:48:35 AM Eastern Standard Time, b4alltoday@... writes: << .I accept Sara for who she is and really love it too, sass and all heehee but am I really preparing her for the future, is there more I should be doing etc.......stuff .....I hope Im not letting her down >> I don't have any other kids so I don't have anything to compare it to, but I feel that way all the time. Should I have learned and taught him more signs? Should he be eating more of a variety of foods? Should I be stricter with him? Should I be pushing him to toilet train? On top of it all I have some family members who like to tell me how I SHOULD be raising him. I've come to the conclusion that he might be further along with another mom, but he might not be as happy, headstrong or independent as he is. It sounds like Sara's a great person. I really believe that people who think this parenthood job is easy probably aren't doing a very good job of it. Kathy, Liam's mom (3 1/2) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 In a message dated 11/1/2001 8:48:35 AM Eastern Standard Time, b4alltoday@... writes: << .I accept Sara for who she is and really love it too, sass and all heehee but am I really preparing her for the future, is there more I should be doing etc.......stuff .....I hope Im not letting her down >> I don't have any other kids so I don't have anything to compare it to, but I feel that way all the time. Should I have learned and taught him more signs? Should he be eating more of a variety of foods? Should I be stricter with him? Should I be pushing him to toilet train? On top of it all I have some family members who like to tell me how I SHOULD be raising him. I've come to the conclusion that he might be further along with another mom, but he might not be as happy, headstrong or independent as he is. It sounds like Sara's a great person. I really believe that people who think this parenthood job is easy probably aren't doing a very good job of it. Kathy, Liam's mom (3 1/2) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 In a message dated 11/1/01 3:01:36 PM Central Standard Time, sharonhughes@... writes: > Sometimes it can be slightly intimidating when you have > a group of " professionals " lined up telling you what > they think is right for your child. But then, she is > my child, and I do what I feel is right. HI Sharon Im guessing when you said they don't do Inclusion you meant that they haven't done Inclusion lol meaning this will be a teaching road you'll have to go down. If the professionals here had their way, all kids would be in self contained classes, they are slowly learning how to do it successfully but it does get frustrating when a Mom knows more than the professionals Heehee But I do go on, buy the books, have the conferences and sell " my way " so far this has worked. I hope when we make our big move I wont have to jump through the hoops like you are going to have to jump through.........I will be turning to you Kathy mom to Sara 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 In a message dated 11/1/01 3:01:36 PM Central Standard Time, sharonhughes@... writes: > Sometimes it can be slightly intimidating when you have > a group of " professionals " lined up telling you what > they think is right for your child. But then, she is > my child, and I do what I feel is right. HI Sharon Im guessing when you said they don't do Inclusion you meant that they haven't done Inclusion lol meaning this will be a teaching road you'll have to go down. If the professionals here had their way, all kids would be in self contained classes, they are slowly learning how to do it successfully but it does get frustrating when a Mom knows more than the professionals Heehee But I do go on, buy the books, have the conferences and sell " my way " so far this has worked. I hope when we make our big move I wont have to jump through the hoops like you are going to have to jump through.........I will be turning to you Kathy mom to Sara 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 Gail, Before amanda got diabetes i was looking into a nutritionist because she was a little over weight. And all that I've read about people with ds and their weight, I didnt want her to have any problems. And because all my life I blamed my mother for my weight problems as a kid because I felt that it was her responsibility to do something about it. well, now 2 years later after having diabetes, amanda has grown like 3 inches and lost like 3 pounds. She also developed this really cute teenager body. With a waist and boobs. Well, she looks so good now, that she can even be said to be " thin " . I look at pics of her right before she got diabetes and she was really heavy! I cant believe how much she's changed. She even went down a size in her jeans!!!!! So my point is, anything is possible to do. too is a picky eater. But we worked on it and now shes used to the foods she eats and those she cant have. I dont really deny her anything, (like she had a piece of Halloween candy), but its all in moderation. I still have to bring food for her to many places because she's sooo picky! Oh, one more thing. My son, jesse gained 17 lbs in one year! and hes only 7. so the pediatrician just took him off soda and juices. he can only have one glass of juice a day and that includes his juice box at lunch. So now he has a lot of water and some diet drinks. It's tough but if we have to do it for our kids sake, well then we do! ~ mom to amanda 11 ds and jesse 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 Gail, Before amanda got diabetes i was looking into a nutritionist because she was a little over weight. And all that I've read about people with ds and their weight, I didnt want her to have any problems. And because all my life I blamed my mother for my weight problems as a kid because I felt that it was her responsibility to do something about it. well, now 2 years later after having diabetes, amanda has grown like 3 inches and lost like 3 pounds. She also developed this really cute teenager body. With a waist and boobs. Well, she looks so good now, that she can even be said to be " thin " . I look at pics of her right before she got diabetes and she was really heavy! I cant believe how much she's changed. She even went down a size in her jeans!!!!! So my point is, anything is possible to do. too is a picky eater. But we worked on it and now shes used to the foods she eats and those she cant have. I dont really deny her anything, (like she had a piece of Halloween candy), but its all in moderation. I still have to bring food for her to many places because she's sooo picky! Oh, one more thing. My son, jesse gained 17 lbs in one year! and hes only 7. so the pediatrician just took him off soda and juices. he can only have one glass of juice a day and that includes his juice box at lunch. So now he has a lot of water and some diet drinks. It's tough but if we have to do it for our kids sake, well then we do! ~ mom to amanda 11 ds and jesse 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 Kathy, As you know, 10 ended up being a really hard year for amanda. But after 10 is 11 and for some reason, this is the year that she is blossming and becoming her own little person. you know all about patience. well sara will just teach you more patience. And of course if she doesnt go where you want her to go, she will go where she wants to and where she is happy. i had to let go of something that was very hard for me. I always struggled about amanda not having friends. Well someone told me once, maybe I want friends for amanda because I think thats the way it should be. Like i had so many friends and how can she be happy with just one??? Well how do we know what makes our kids happy? amanda may very well be happy with one good friend and in fact, that may be all that she can handle. So who are we to determine what makes our children happy and productive???? We just have to provide the opportunities and then they will decide their life and we will sit by and ACCEPT what they do, and be happy and always know we did our very best. Especially you. and you know that! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 Kathy, As you know, 10 ended up being a really hard year for amanda. But after 10 is 11 and for some reason, this is the year that she is blossming and becoming her own little person. you know all about patience. well sara will just teach you more patience. And of course if she doesnt go where you want her to go, she will go where she wants to and where she is happy. i had to let go of something that was very hard for me. I always struggled about amanda not having friends. Well someone told me once, maybe I want friends for amanda because I think thats the way it should be. Like i had so many friends and how can she be happy with just one??? Well how do we know what makes our kids happy? amanda may very well be happy with one good friend and in fact, that may be all that she can handle. So who are we to determine what makes our children happy and productive???? We just have to provide the opportunities and then they will decide their life and we will sit by and ACCEPT what they do, and be happy and always know we did our very best. Especially you. and you know that! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 Kathy, I HEAR YOU!! I went through that big time last year!! I was looking at other kids with ds and seeing their strengths where Mav had weaknesses. I was wondering if I wasn't doing enough. I was wondering if I was focusing on the wrong areas......I even wondered if he would have done better if he were in the self contained classroom!! What I realized was that Mav was GREAT in some areas....and not so great in other areas...just like the rest of my kids. I do the best that I can..and more than many.....and I just have to accept that we are where we are because that is where we are meant to be!! And the HEAVEN issue....Been there done that!! My friend and I had this discussion when our boys were 5. I stated that I didn't want Mav not to be Mav...and if he didn't have DS that is a major part of HIM...so he was already perfect in my eyes. (Does that make sense?) told me she felt that when our kids went to Heaven they would still have DS because that WAS/IS them, but with none of the problems that go with it. That explaination suits me fine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 Kathy, I HEAR YOU!! I went through that big time last year!! I was looking at other kids with ds and seeing their strengths where Mav had weaknesses. I was wondering if I wasn't doing enough. I was wondering if I was focusing on the wrong areas......I even wondered if he would have done better if he were in the self contained classroom!! What I realized was that Mav was GREAT in some areas....and not so great in other areas...just like the rest of my kids. I do the best that I can..and more than many.....and I just have to accept that we are where we are because that is where we are meant to be!! And the HEAVEN issue....Been there done that!! My friend and I had this discussion when our boys were 5. I stated that I didn't want Mav not to be Mav...and if he didn't have DS that is a major part of HIM...so he was already perfect in my eyes. (Does that make sense?) told me she felt that when our kids went to Heaven they would still have DS because that WAS/IS them, but with none of the problems that go with it. That explaination suits me fine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2001 Report Share Posted November 1, 2001 Sharon, What state are you in? You need to contact Pilot Parent, ARC, something,,,,and get some advocates to help you. Inclusion is a RIGHT...not a method a state or district uses....(although they will have you believe otherwise.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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